Sexless Marriages

She's 69. I'm 66. I try to entice her every other Saturday afternoon or evening with no luck. It's just been too uncomfortable for her. Last Saturday morning, I woke up and spooned her, rubbing my cock up and down her panty covered tush. She kind of wiggled against me making me think maybe she's up for something. I started rubbing her snatch over her panties from from behind and she didn't push me away, so I pulled them off and started rubbing her on the outside of her slit. Finally coated my middle finger with saliva and slipped it in. She was very relaxed and even pushed against me a bit. Only problem was that she wouldn't change positions, kind of half on her back, half on her side. Reached into the night stand and grabbed some lube. Got both my hands slick, then coated my cock. Twisted myself in position to slip it inside her and it went right in. Usually takes a few minutes for her to adjust which makes it hard to maintain my erection. This time she opened up nicely. I started humping but was very uncomfortable because of her position. I grabbed her hips and started pulling myself into her really fast. Was starting to feel a surge but wasn't sure my back would hold out long enough. Finally pushed my right index finger deep in her ass and started pumping it. Only took another 10 seconds before I unloaded several weeks worth of backed up jizz. I grabbed the hand towel that's been sitting on my night stand for weeks and stuck it between her legs. She went right back to sleep. Found out later that she had taken a Klonipan right before bedtime. Now I know what to do next time.
 
The last time I remember having actual sex with my wife was pre COVID... There's been the occasional dalliance but that's typically only me getting her off with a toy / fingers / mouth / etc before she rolls over and I go to my computer and check out Chatropolis for someone to chat with.

Not sexually compatible, as well as lack of sex drive from her due to PCOS, or at least, partly so.

So yes, here we all are, huh...
 
The last time I remember having actual sex with my wife was pre COVID... There's been the occasional dalliance but that's typically only me getting her off with a toy / fingers / mouth / etc before she rolls over and I go to my computer and check out Chatropolis for someone to chat with.

Not sexually compatible, as well as lack of sex drive from her due to PCOS, or at least, partly so.

So yes, here we all are, huh...
Yepp
 
So, possibly some development. I pushed the "platonic?" question again. It seemed to lead to some progress, though there were also some tears as well. I tried to keep ALL the anger out of it, though I did express how hurt, anger, depression and loneliness had impacted my mental health.

I'll share this, in case it helps one of you. I'm multilingual; she is not. I described it this way to her. I asked her to imagine that I decided (with no known reason) to stop speaking English to her when I come home. She'd know that I CAN speak English, but suddenly, I just stop speaking "her" language. Eventually, you'd get lonely because now you can't talk, can't share, can't enjoy the person who has been your best friend most of your life. That illustration seemed to help her understand.

It seemed like we had some breakthrough, though my optimism is highly guarded. I'll let y'all know if it bears fruit.
 
Sex was a real joy when we were younger, but it got to be just less and less important to her. So now I work and then sit around on my days off because I just don’t really care right now. I’ve lost 90lbs in 18 months without even trying. I have no health issues and can eat whatever I want. It seems like I need to get my brain fixed. I probably shouldn’t post this, because I’ll never find anyone to chat with now 🤷‍♂️🤪
 
Heading to the gym. 💦 Working out helps me deal with the frustrations at home. Have a great day friends.
Dude, props to you. This sounds very similar to me. I just started my journey last week. I decided to stop feeling sorrow for myself and get off the couch. At this point I just work out at home but any pointers or things to watch out for in my journey would be appreciated.
 
Dude, props to you. This sounds very similar to me. I just started my journey last week. I decided to stop feeling sorrow for myself and get off the couch. At this point I just work out at home but any pointers or things to watch out for in my journey would be appreciated.
Good for you! It all starts with one step, one lift, one mile. I found a very supportive community at my gym. After a year, I lost 60lbs. It’s a journey so be kind to yourself.
 
Mine is sexless because he refused to take care of diabetes when it first happened. Now he's been impotent for over 10 years but it's not just that. I got tired of asking for a hug, some not sexual touch other than when he wants a hj or bj. Even though it is a disease there's a lot of contained rage because he could have taken care of himself. Sex consists of giving him start he wants, then turns around a goes to sleep and i take care of myself when I'm alone. It's a lonely life.
I get no physical attention and try get a hug and she goes stop it
 
Checking in with all the people with whom this thread reasonates. Sexless and lonely. How has your March started?

Anyone making meaningful connections on Lit?

With Spring coming soon, hope springs forth.

Hang in there peeps!
I am very hopeful. Soon I'll have the money for the divorce and I can finally get out of this ridiculous, sexless marriage. I can't wait to lay down with someone who has something to offer
 
In the same boat, been mostly sexless marriage for the last 7 years, completely for the last 2. I'm 40 and she is 34. At one point she suggested opening the marriage up and things improved greatly for about 6 months before she got jealous and I had to close everything back up, so back to trying to find a connection with someone who is only online so as to appease her and still have some outlet for myself that she isn't interested in. I don't understand why she cares if she isn't interested in sex, but no matter the conversation she has never really given me an explanation that clicks for me. I hope everyone is having a wonderful day.
 
In the same boat, been mostly sexless marriage for the last 7 years, completely for the last 2. I'm 40 and she is 34. At one point she suggested opening the marriage up and things improved greatly for about 6 months before she got jealous and I had to close everything back up, so back to trying to find a connection with someone who is only online so as to appease her and still have some outlet for myself that she isn't interested in. I don't understand why she cares if she isn't interested in sex, but no matter the conversation she has never really given me an explanation that clicks for me. I hope everyone is having a wonderful day.
Did you find an outlet
 
Same crud. The depression is a constant battle.
I recently asked her if what she wanted was actually a platonic marriage (since, by way of refusal, that's what she's actually forcing on ME). She sputtered, said she wasn't saying anything like that...but then she didn't say it's NOT what she wants, either. We had some unrelated crap stir up, so it got tabled, but I'm going to press it again this weekend. Time to just put the cards on the table.
If she says yes, that's her desire, then that's my open pass to meet those needs elsewhere with no guilt. If she says no, I'm preparing some expectations. No more riding the fence.
Good luck with your battle
 
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