Toffer_Guy
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Mar 6, 2013
- Posts
- 574
Hello. I’ve written and published my first story in Lit. I have a chapter two and three roughly planned out, but I’ve been trying to get some input to see what works and what doesn’t from the first part before diving into the next chapter. I’m especially interested in hearing from women readers, and I partially wrote this with women in mind. I consulted with at least eight different women on what they want in this sort of erotic fiction.
The inspiration for the story was looking in the Fetish forums and how often I saw women expressing shame for their rough sex/non-con fantasies. Yet, they’re just fantasies. Not something people should feel shame about. As I learned in psychology in school. That fantasy is a lot more common than many are willing to admit, due to social stigma. I was aiming to normalize the fantasy of a CNC situation.
A rough summary is that a married woman has a wild past and uses the long hours of alone time at her job to masturbate to some of her darker fantasies. It's more about her describing her fantasies with no actual sex occurring. This was written for people who enjoy rough sex, CNC themes, age gaps, group sex, dirty talk, and pregnancy risk. If you don’t enjoy those themes. You likely won’t enjoy this.
One big revision this went through in the first draft was the final scene. Multiple test readers were disappointed the final scene is revealed to be a dream that didn’t happen. Which was frustrating, given how many times I pointed out the story is about her fantasies. I tried fixing the final scene with gaps of snapping back to reality due to some distraction in reality.
I did appreciate one comment enjoyed that my main character wasn’t a mindless sexpot. I just need a bit more to go on and hopefully from more than one source.
What I’m looking for are thoughts on the main character, favorite part, anything that feels like it crossed a line to get too rough, thoughts on the dialog, and impressions of the big, final scene. It felt like a balancing act to write a CNC fantasy where things are a little scary for the thrill but not being excessively violent. I wanted rollercoaster/slasher movie thrills.
I hadn’t intended the story to be a four page story, but I needed the early part to set up the character and her way of thinking. Following chapters shouldn’t be as long.
Here is the link to my story: Venus Sunset Mall Escapades Ch. 1
Anyone interested, feel free to post here or in DM.
The inspiration for the story was looking in the Fetish forums and how often I saw women expressing shame for their rough sex/non-con fantasies. Yet, they’re just fantasies. Not something people should feel shame about. As I learned in psychology in school. That fantasy is a lot more common than many are willing to admit, due to social stigma. I was aiming to normalize the fantasy of a CNC situation.
A rough summary is that a married woman has a wild past and uses the long hours of alone time at her job to masturbate to some of her darker fantasies. It's more about her describing her fantasies with no actual sex occurring. This was written for people who enjoy rough sex, CNC themes, age gaps, group sex, dirty talk, and pregnancy risk. If you don’t enjoy those themes. You likely won’t enjoy this.
One big revision this went through in the first draft was the final scene. Multiple test readers were disappointed the final scene is revealed to be a dream that didn’t happen. Which was frustrating, given how many times I pointed out the story is about her fantasies. I tried fixing the final scene with gaps of snapping back to reality due to some distraction in reality.
I did appreciate one comment enjoyed that my main character wasn’t a mindless sexpot. I just need a bit more to go on and hopefully from more than one source.
What I’m looking for are thoughts on the main character, favorite part, anything that feels like it crossed a line to get too rough, thoughts on the dialog, and impressions of the big, final scene. It felt like a balancing act to write a CNC fantasy where things are a little scary for the thrill but not being excessively violent. I wanted rollercoaster/slasher movie thrills.
I hadn’t intended the story to be a four page story, but I needed the early part to set up the character and her way of thinking. Following chapters shouldn’t be as long.
Here is the link to my story: Venus Sunset Mall Escapades Ch. 1
Anyone interested, feel free to post here or in DM.
Last edited:
