Safe_Bet
No she's not back I'm Amy
- Joined
- Aug 6, 2008
- Posts
- 8,663
Safe_Bet, you're still ignoring the reliable sources I've shown you that show that there are different definitions of lesbian. I just got through agreeing with Dyslexicea that the way some people, including some researchers, define us as though sex is all we are about is frustrating. But these definitions (page 22) among researchers exist. And they exist because a lot of women define themselves as lesbian based on the things mentioned in that source.
Nope not ignoring just disagreeing for the most part. Sure there are SOME researchers who believe as you say. There are also some researchers that believe that we are all the work of the devil, have horns, eat babies and cause cancer.
What I AM saying is that the VAST majority of researchers (and thinking logical folks) agree that if you routinely, or even occasionally, fuck both men and women you are bi not lesbian.
As for you being back, you never left, right? Or someone contacted you about this thread? Either way, I'm going to go ahead and state "Welcome back." Maybe we can start over. After all, most people don't agree on everything. And people can dislike each other's beliefs while still being civil.
Actually, I been busy.... I merged the company I owned with another and then a few months ago we bought another firm. Like I said... we've been busy.
BTW, just to clarify, the first person you ever TRIED to get into it with that used this account WAS my late wife. She had passed before I responded to any of your attempts at "debate". I, frankly, give a rat's ass who you THINK I am, but I will tell you that seeing as how this weekend is the anniversary of her passing I would be VERY careful of expressing your "skepticism". I am willing to be civil with you, but if you push that particular subject I will go the fuck off.
I did follow your post to find where you and Safe_Bet, by the way it was Safe_Bet's wife Amy, had your debate. After reading what Amy said I guess I'm going change my mind and agree with her. Labels are important. I'm a lesbian. I'll always be a lesbian, sexual orientation is not fluid, as some claim, unless of course your bi. If a woman enjoys relationships involving sex with a man she isn't a lesbian, she's bisexual.
Guess what, being a lesbian isn't about sex, it's about life, it's about who we are. Sex is but a minor part of our lives with other women. Even if I never have sex again I'll still be a lesbian!
Taking a deep breath. Regardless of what I've just said, I have nothing against bisexual women. I've had relationships with enough of them that Amy may have said I can't possibly be a lesbian. But I would never be with a woman who was also with a man at the same time she was with me.
Thanks.
BTW, I don't usually have an issue with bisexual women either. All I've ever asked is that they let me KNOW that they are bisexual so that I have a choice. It's when they basically lie and say that they are lesbian, then go back and fuck some dude that I have a problem. I don't like having my choice not to fuck dudes, even by proxy, taken away from me.
It was better not mentioning Safe_Bet. Are you trying to bait her into commenting? But she did acknowledge that not all lesbians are "gold star lesbians" (as in lesbians who have never had sex with a man). She stated that she isn't one either, though her sexual interaction with a man was the result of rape. And, as a lot of us know, rape is discounted as "having had sex" in a lot of people's opinions.
I've stressed here and elsewhere that most lesbians (and most gay men) have engaged in sexual activity with the opposite sex due to heteronormative society.
Safe_Bet is against women identifying as lesbian but occasionally having sex with men, as well as women who state that they have minor sexual attraction to men while identifying as lesbian...but don't have sex with men. As you obviously remember, though maybe not my involvement, this resulted in debates between the two of us (and other people) because I feel that it is okay that these women identify as lesbian. For a lot of these women, the lesbian label fits them better than the bisexual label because their sexual attraction to men is so minor that they can't be sexually happy with men. And I see why it fits them better, especially in the case of those who don't have sex with men at all.
Geez... It's NEVER been a case of me "acknowledging" that not all lesbians are "gold star lesbians", FFS! Of course they aren't. I would dare say that the hugest part of the lesbian population isn't. To say otherwise is stupid.
In fact, one of the very, very few I have ever met was my late wife and she didn't find the idea of having M/F sex to be repulsive as much as being something that held 0% interest for her and that she strongly disliked being pressured towards by the hetero community. I on the other hand, absolutely do find the thought to be abhorrent. I'd sooner shoot myself than have sex with a man (or a woman who does). There's nothing wrong with hetero sexual attraction, it just makes ME PERSONALLY nauseous
...Im surprised the head of lesbian affairs and authority; Safe_Bet hasnt stepped in talking about "psuedo-lesbians" and how any "true" lez will get kicked out of the guild if she lay with beast(men). ....
Dude you aren't a lesbian, or even a woman, so why the freak'in hell are you even IN this convo? Your "opinion" has no validity.
Oh, and fuck off, asshat!