How to use/get the most out of a vibrator?

[cheekygirl75]

I just got my first vibrator last week (I’m a late starter, I know). The first two or three times I used it were fine. I eventually came but it took longer than I expected. And since then, it’s been harder and harder to come, ending at not being able to at all yesterday, after trying a few times.

I never got a vibrator before now because I thought it would just get me off really quickly but only a small orgasm. Now I feel like it’s just making me de-sensitized and numb. I would understand this if I were just using it every free moment in the last week, but I really haven’t I don’t think.

So my questions are: has anyone else had a similar experience? Did you just give up on the toy? Or is there something I’m doing wrong? Or that could help make it more enjoyable? Or did I maybe just get a crappy toy? It wasn’t an expensive one, like $20 from Amazon. Would a better quality one toy work better?

 

[jehoram]

Well, I don't have much experience with them, but others who do have that experience have posted that vibrators do have a desensitizing effect if you use them a lot. The trick is to use it sparingly, or use different kinds of vibrators in rotation.

But also bear in mind that there are times when you are feeling more horny than other times. When you use the vibrator during one of those lulls, it's not going to have the same effect. So don't blame the tool.

I hope you figure it out and have many, many happy orgasms!

 

[uncle easy]

What to do

Buy you a Hitachi magic wand. They are some what on the expensive side,,but. You will cumm fast, hard, and many times. My wife loves her and has had it for several years. Hope you get one. If you do let us know what you think.

 

[NaomiDPlumm]

If traveling abroad don't be like Nick Rivers' (Val Kilmer's) unfortunate underground contact in the movie 'Top Secret' (1984)...

Streck: "What he did not realize was that, in this country, we use 220-volt current. He was found dead in his room with this... " (a "jack hammer" shaped dildo.)

 

[Ssbbw4u1974]

Vibrators

I enjoy a long, thick dildo in my pussy, fuck myself with that for a bit before putting my magic wand on my clit!
It makes the orgasm incredible!

 

[Silk_Princess]

Trial and Error

I don’t have answers to all of your questions, but can commiserate with the experience of purchasing a vibrator that does not work for you, for whatever reason. It is frustrating in more ways than one! The only way I have found to remedy this is through trial and error of different vibrator types. It could be that the novelty of the experience helped you get off the first time, but you need a different type of vibrator to provide you with a more consistently satisfying experience. There are so many different types of vibrators available these days in terms of shape, target zone(s), intensity and technology. Which is good, because we’re all built a little differently. If you have not already, consider researching different types on a good sex toy website, and see if a different style sounds more appealing. Good Vibrations, She Vibes, and LoveHoney are among this sites that have some good educational and comparative information, though you may need to dig through the websites a little bit to find it. Of these, LoveHoney actually has a “happiness guarantee” where they will refund the cost of a sex toy with which you are dissatisfied if you explain why, which helps mitigate the financial risk. (There are of course limits to this policy to prevent abuse, but I have used it without hassle). And if you don’t see anything in your price range, I think your strategy of starting with a lower-cost version on Amazon makes sense — if you find a style you like you can then consider upgrading later.

When you talk about being “de-sensitized” I’m not sure if you mean literally feeling numb (which can happen), or being bored by a repeat experience, or both. In the former case, you might consider taking a look at some of the new-ish “air pleasure” vibrators — the Womanizer is the best known (and admittedly expensive) but there are now many cheaper models that use similar types of technology. Good luck!

 

[30bandits]

I just got my first vibrator last week (I’m a late starter, I know). The first two or three times I used it were fine. I eventually came but it took longer than I expected. And since then, it’s been harder and harder to come, ending at not being able to at all yesterday, after trying a few times.

I never got a vibrator before now because I thought it would just get me off really quickly but only a small orgasm. Now I feel like it’s just making me de-sensitized and numb. I would understand this if I were just using it every free moment in the last week, but I really haven’t I don’t think.

So my questions are: has anyone else had a similar experience? Did you just give up on the toy? Or is there something I’m doing wrong? Or that could help make it more enjoyable? Or did I maybe just get a crappy toy? It wasn’t an expensive one, like $20 from Amazon. Would a better quality one toy work better?

you could add a hot wet tongue to the action....

 

[NightL]

you could add a hot wet tongue to the action....

There is even a product for that

https://vimeo.com/403489241

 

[Jada59]

I had a vibrator that was perfect. Actually a massager. Naked? Orgasm in seconds. Clothed? Orgasm in minutes. Alas, it was borrowed and never returned. I have never found another like that. Used to be 2 or 3 companies that made a similar design. There are a couple now (old stock) that look similar but pack no punch.

My Hitachi is hit and miss. Attachments ere worthless. My search continues. Most of the sex toys I've bought over the years were pretty worthless.

 

[BongoGal]

Fwiw, I use vibrators sparingly. I typically go weeks between uses. It seems to keep it a novelty.

 

[cheekygirl75]

Thanks for all the responses! I think I'll just have to try another type - I got the recommendation for Tracy's Dog in another thread. Strange name I know but it's supposed to be amazing! And it's very different than what I have... Fingers crossed!

 

[Mei5ter]

Thanks for all the responses! I think I'll just have to try another type - I got the recommendation for Tracy's Dog in another thread. Strange name I know but it's supposed to be amazing! And it's very different than what I have... Fingers crossed!

I'm reliably informed that, if anything, Tracy's Dog is ruthlessly effective. Fiddly to get the positioning right, but once you have...it works. Consistently. The only thing I've heard against it is that the ruthless efficiency militates against getting happily lost in the moment, but I can imagine there are worse problems!

 

[lanceGibs]

I admire the fact that men appear to be knowledgeable in the field.
While I see no point in reading what the men have written ,I would add for cheeky to cheer up ,relax .It's just the initial hesitation.
You will be gushing soon.

 

[AnnieLit]

I never got a vibrator before now because I thought it would just get me off really quickly but only a small orgasm. Now I feel like it’s just making me de-sensitized and numb. I would understand this if I were just using it every free moment in the last week, but I really haven’t I don’t think.

What type is your vibe and where are you using it? Meaning, inside or outside?
If you are talking about getting de-sensitized by a cheap toy DO NOT get a hitachi! It is the strongest one out there and you will kill yourself in seconds. You will eventually recover, but it's no fun.

As for the Tracy's Dog, you can get that, or you can get just a regular suction vibe and combine it with the one you already have. Who said you can'tuse them one at a time? But this way, if you decide to use only the suction part, it will be easier to do so. There are few brands making them, I think Womanizer was the first one and it is still the most expensive one. Satisfyer Pro costs about 1/3 of that, but a few people that tried both said that there is no difference.

A big plus of suction vibes is that there is no risk of overdoing it.

The trick with any type of vibes to make your orgasm stronger is edging. Try going light (barely touching with a regular vibe or on lower power with a suction one) and stop as soon as you feel the wave rising in you. Take a breath or two and go again. And stop again. Repeat. You will see that it takes you less and less time to get there. When you are at the point where you start feeling it the moment the vibe makes the contact, then you are ready - don't stop, let it happen. You will love it!

When I was just starting a long time ago I discovered that 10 sec intervals work best for me: lightly on for 10 sec, couple seconds off, 10 on, 2 off. This pattern worked even before I would get to that wave feeling. And then it becomes harder and harder to stop and it's up to you when not to stop at all and let it happen.

How many iterations it will take to get there nobody will know untill you try, it can be 3, it can be 10, it really depends on so many things. And it will change day to day too. Your mood, the day of the cycle, time since the last time you played, if you are tired or sleepy -- they all affect how your body reacts. But even when it takes a long time, this low intensity self teasing should still be very pleasurable.

Hope this helps

 

[lanceGibs]

What type is your vibe and where are you using it? Meaning, inside or outside?
If you are talking about getting de-sensitized by a cheap toy DO NOT get a hitachi! It is the strongest one out there and you will kill yourself in seconds. You will eventually recover, but it's no fun.

As for the Tracy's Dog, you can get that, or you can get just a regular suction vibe and combine it with the one you already have. Who said you can'tuse them one at a time? But this way, if you decide to use only the suction part, it will be easier to do so. There are few brands making them, I think Womanizer was the first one and it is still the most expensive one. Satisfyer Pro costs about 1/3 of that, but a few people that tried both said that there is no difference.

A big plus of suction vibes is that there is no risk of overdoing it.

The trick with any type of vibes to make your orgasm stronger is edging. Try going light (barely touching with a regular vibe or on lower power with a suction one) and stop as soon as you feel the wave rising in you. Take a breath or two and go again. And stop again. Repeat. You will see that it takes you less and less time to get there. When you are at the point where you start feeling it the moment the vibe makes the contact, then you are ready - don't stop, let it happen. You will love it!

When I was just starting a long time ago I discovered that 10 sec intervals work best for me: lightly on for 10 sec, couple seconds off, 10 on, 2 off. This pattern worked even before I would get to that wave feeling. And then it becomes harder and harder to stop and it's up to you when not to stop at all and let it happen.

How many iterations it will take to get there nobody will know untill you try, it can be 3, it can be 10, it really depends on so many things. And it will change day to day too. Your mood, the day of the cycle, time since the last time you played, if you are tired or sleepy -- they all affect how your body reacts. But even when it takes a long time, this low intensity self teasing should still be very pleasurable.

Hope this helps

This girl knows how things work.

 

[Savanasexi]

I just got my first vibrator last week (I’m a late starter, I know). The first two or three times I used it were fine. I eventually came but it took longer than I expected. And since then, it’s been harder and harder to come, ending at not being able to at all yesterday, after trying a few times.

I never got a vibrator before now because I thought it would just get me off really quickly but only a small orgasm. Now I feel like it’s just making me de-sensitized and numb. I would understand this if I were just using it every free moment in the last week, but I really haven’t I don’t think.

So my questions are: has anyone else had a similar experience? Did you just give up on the toy? Or is there something I’m doing wrong? Or that could help make it more enjoyable? Or did I maybe just get a crappy toy? It wasn’t an expensive one, like $20 from Amazon. Would a better quality one toy work better?

Hi
The numbing sensation you speak of is something that can happen to the clitoris. I dont know how common it is, but I have heard of this problem before. My opinion is that it could happen with a toy that delivers high frequency vibration and could even bruise your clitoris. I'm not saying that high frequence vibes will cause it, but desensitisation is real.
It is similar to "White Knuckle" which is a real problem from construction machines that deliver high frequence vibrations (mechanical hammers) and affects the users knuckles. The effects are numbness in the users hands and can last for a long time.

 

[Athalia]

I had a vibrator that was perfect. Actually a massager. Naked? Orgasm in seconds. Clothed? Orgasm in minutes. Alas, it was borrowed and never returned. I have never found another like that. Used to be 2 or 3 companies that made a similar design. There are a couple now (old stock) that look similar but pack no punch.

I feel for you, sister. One of my first vibrator-induced orgasms came from one of those. It got lost in one of my many moves over the years. I miss it. Like you, I've tried other similar ones, but they usually required some modification in the padding, or lack thereof, to get them into the ballpark.

A boyfriend of mine hooked one up to a sort of dimmer switch so that I could dial in the amount of vibration. That helped.

My Hitachi is hit and miss. Attachments ere worthless. My search continues. Most of the sex toys I've bought over the years were pretty worthless.

I've spent my share of money on worthless ones, as well. If LoveHoney offers a money-back guarantee, that would be a huge selling point.

 

[AnnieLit]

I had a vibrator that was perfect. Actually a massager. Naked? Orgasm in seconds. Clothed? Orgasm in minutes. Alas, it was borrowed and never returned. I have never found another like that. Used to be 2 or 3 companies that made a similar design. There are a couple now (old stock) that look similar but pack no punch.

I wonder now what it was...

My first one was a Conair massager, it lasted for about 10 years, died, and I got a new one exactly the same. That also was more than 10 years ago, but I think they still make them.

 

[AnnieLit]

This girl knows how things work.

Thank you.
I know how things work for me. For others it might be the same, or it might be not.

 

[Savanasexi]

What to do

Buy you a Hitachi magic wand. They are some what on the expensive side,,but. You will cumm fast, hard, and many times. My wife loves her and has had it for several years. Hope you get one. If you do let us know what you think.

 

[Savanasexi]

I have to disagree with you about the Hitachi wand.They are not good for clitoris masturbating.
They have very high frequency vibration and can cause desensitisation of the clitoris. This is something we should avoid if we are to enjoy long term masturbating, or risk ruining your clitoris for ever. By All means buy a wand, but get one with less high frequency.

 

[Lady2020]

Overall, I think vibrators are a good option to the tool box. I threw my last beloved vibrator into the trash. My bf at the time had bought it for me, which I appreciated. What I didn't appreciate was being told to use the vibrator when I wanted sex with him. So I took that damned vibrator and forcefully threw in in the garbage can, and left it there. I'm not into solo bc after a while it gets old fast. But I realize others don't feel the same way.

 

[Diosax]

There is even a product for that

I love it when a thread reminds me of something. I have this lol

Thanks for all the responses! I think I'll just have to try another type - I got the recommendation for Tracy's Dog in another thread. Strange name I know but it's supposed to be amazing! And it's very different than what I have... Fingers crossed!

I've been meaning to get one from there. Did you?


We are all different so what works for one may not work for the next person. Using lube is important and even though the toy will do a lot of the work you also want to make sure you're aroused before using the toy. Alternating toys or places of use (clit v penetration) might also help with the desensitizing issue. Personally rotating between toys works. But you need at least 2 toys to be able to do that. If the vibrations are too high you can also use something so that there isn't direct contact. Such as doing it over your underwear or something similar

 

[curiouschattycouple]

Variety is good. Dildos, clitoral, g-spot, etc on a rotation or in combination. We started with a cheap "egg", then added a "rabbit", then dildos, then g-spot, then a womanizer, then a wand. Lovehoney has always had great product support...

 

[AlleeDreap]

First off, congrats on getting your first vibrator! It's totally normal to have different experiences with it, and sometimes it takes a bit of experimenting to figure out what works best for you. You're right. It's not just about the price but finding the right toy that suits your preferences. Maybe the $20 one wasn't the perfect fit for you.
Remember, a vibrator is like a loyal partner that's always ready to please, so don't be discouraged if it takes time to find your sweet spot. It's all about exploring and discovering what feels good for you. If you're looking for some fresh ideas or different toys to try, you could check out edenfantasys. They have a wide variety of options that might pique your interest.