Dictionary: BDSM Library Thread (READ ONLY)

[bdsm_librarian]

Dictionary

1-10

• 24/7: see lifestyler.

Af - An

• After Care: A period of time after intense BDSM activity in which the dominant partner cares for the submissive partner.

• Age Play: Acting out the role of someone of a different age, such as a Dom/me playing a baby to be taken care of by a submissive playing mommy/daddy or vice versa; see infantilism.

• Algolagnia: The act of transforming pain into sexual pleasure.

• Alpha Sub: In a relationship in which one dominant has more than one submissive, the submissive accorded the greatest power or respect among all the submissives. See polyamory.

• Alternative Lifestyle: Having a sexuality that differs significantly from the 'norm'.

• Anal Beads: These are a sex toy which usually consists of several small balls/beads which are attached together in a line.

Ba - Bu

• Bastinado: Any form of pain play involving inflicting pain on the soles of the feet, often by striking, cropping, or whipping them.

• BBW: Big, beautiful woman.

• Blood Play: Any activity involving drawing blood. Specific types of blood play include needle play and knife play, among others.

• BOB: Battery operated boyfriend; see vibrator.

• Body Modification: Deliberate physical alteration of the human body, such as tattooing and piercing.

• Bondage: Sexual practice that involves physically restraining one of the partners.

• Bottom Topping: See topping from the bottom.

• Breast Play/Torture: See tit torture.

• Breath Play: The deprivation of air during sexual role playing games, including choking, hanging, and other such oxygen deprivation acts.

• Bukkake: From the Japanese "to splash water". A sexual practice, originating in Japan, in which a very large number of men masturbate and ejaculate onto a person.

• Butt Plug: These are sex toys which are inserted into the anus to enhance your sexual pleasure. They are normally shorter than dildos and vibrators and usually have a flared end to prevent the Butt Plug becoming lost inside the rectum.

Ca - Cu

• Canes: Long, thin rods with straight (as opposed to the curved one on grandpa’s) handles. The most common materials used to make canes are nylon and fiberglass, and the more expensive rattan.

• CBT: (Cock and ball torture) is a sexual activity involving torture of the male genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball busting, genital flogging, urethral play, tickle torture, erotic electro-stimulation or even kicking.

• Claws: Gloves that have long talons attached to them (claws can also come by themselves, with some kind of finger attachment).

• Clitoris: The Clitoris is a Female sexual organ located just above the Vagina and Urethra.

• Clover clamps: A clamp used to stimulate the nipples by applying varying degrees of pressure. Its basic principle relies on restriction of blood flow to the erect nipple. See tit torture.

• Cock Ring: A Cock ring is a ringed device which is placed around the base of a mans penis. This slows down the penises blood flow and helps to maintain an erection for longer than normal.

• Conditioning: The term used in psychology for the deliberate process of creating a psychological link between a desired response and an unrelated stimulus.

• Consensual Non-Consent: a style of play in which the participants have agreed to consent to non-consent. Basically the participants have agreed that for the purposes of this scene, the pyl will be 'forced' and the PYL will use force, and that words like "No" or "Stop" will effectively be ignored. Best used with a safe word. Also known as resistance play and a 'rape' scene.

• Crops: Riding crops. The flap at the end is usually what is used. The shaft of the crop is used less often.

• Cross Dresser: Someone who dresses up in the other gender’s clothes. Often male, but not always.

• Cupping: a form of traditional medicine found in many cultures worldwide. It involves placing cups containing reduced air pressure (suction) on the skin. It is known in local languages as badkesh, banki, bahnkes, bekam, buhang, bentusa, kuyukaku, gak hoi, hijama, and many other names.

• Cum, cumming: Male semen; Female ejaculatory discharge; To have an orgasm; to ejaculate or to feel the sensation of an orgasm.

• Cunnilingus: Cunnilingus is the act of using the mouth, lips, and tongue to stimulate the female genitals. See oral sex.

De - Du

• Dental Dam: A latex barrier used for cunnilingus, or felatio to prevent disease transmission.

• Dildo: A Dildo is a sex toy that is shaped like a mans penis and is inserted into the vagina or anus for sexual pleasure.

• Discipline: Punishment in order to gain control or enforce obedience.

• Dom Space: Dom Space also has another meaning which is analogous to the second meaning of subspace. It is when the PYL becomes so intensely focused on the play that they feel as if they are in themselves, outside of themselves observing, and also gloriously one with the pyl.

• D/s: Dominance and submission; is a set of behaviors, customs and rituals involving the giving by one individual to another individual of dominance over them in an erotic episode or as a lifestyle.

• Dungeon: A dungeon is any place specifically designated for play and where larger equipment specifically used for the purpose of play is kept.

Ed - Ex

• Edgeplay: Those activities which involve a larger risk of damage, physical and/or emotional, than others.

• Enema: The act of introducing water or other liquid into the bowel or lower intestine, often by means of a nozzle inserted into the anus and connected to a liquid-filled bag or bulb. Commentary: Enemas may be given for pleasure (some people find the sensations enjoyable or arousing), as a form of humiliation play, or simply as a precursor to anal sex.

• ETA: Edited to add.

• Exhibitionist: One who is sexually aroused by showing others his or her body or by being watched, particularly in a sexual setting or while engaged in sexual activity.

Fe - Fo

• Fellatio: Oral sex performed upon the penis. Also known as a blow job. See oral sex.

• Female Ejaculation: Refers to the expulsion of noticeable amounts of clear fluid by human females from the para urethral ducts through and around the urethra during or before orgasm. Also known as squirting or gushing.

• Feminization: See sissification.

• Fetish: A fetish or fetishism is the term given to a sexual arousal to a body part, situation or any object which is not commonly viewed as being sexual or arousal in nature.

• Figging: The practice of placing a piece of carved ginger root into the anus or vagina. The result is a burning sensation which many people claim can intensify orgasm, and which other people use as an adjunct to physical discipline such as spanking.

• Fire Play: Fire play is a type of BDSM play that involves lighting 50% to 70% rubbing alcohol or other flammable substances on or very close to the skin.

• Fisting: Fisting is a sexual activity that involves inserting a hand into the vagina or rectum. Once insertion is complete, the fingers either naturally clench into a fist or remain straight.

• Flogger: A catchall term that includes any multi-thonged whip (a whip with more than one "tail" on it, if that helps to picture it).

• Foot Fetish: A pronounced sexual interest in feet.

G - Gu

• G-spot: The G-Spot is a term used to describe an erogenous zone within the vagina that when stimulated results in a very heightened state of arousal / sexual pleasure and can lead to very powerful orgasms.

• Golden Showers: A sexual act where people urinate on each other. Also known as watersports.

• Gorean: In the most general use of the word, Gorean means anything characteristic of the Gor science fiction novels by John Norman.

• Gushing: See female ejaculation.

He - Hu

• Head Games: See Mind Fuck.

• HNG: Horny Net Geek.

• Humiliation Play: Sexual arousal from activities which include an element of humiliation, shame, or embarrassment for one or more of the participants.

Im - In

• Impact Play: Any activity involving striking or hitting, as for example flogging, spanking, whipping, or percussion.

• Infantilism: An emotional dependency on being treated as an infant; a sexual dependency on the sight or feeling of diapers, or being diapered.

Ka - Kn

• Kajira: A term taken from John Norman's Gore series to refer to a Gorean female pleasure slave. See gorean.

• Kinky: Showing or appealing to 'different' or 'deviant' tastes.

• Kitten Play: See pet play.

• Knife Play: Knife play is form of consensual BDSM edgeplay involving knives, daggers, and swords as a source of physical and mental stimulation. See blood play.

Le - Lu

• Leather: Used in a general sense to describe the people who do bdsm, or whatever else you call it. Most commonly it is used as an adjective, e.g., leather community, leatherfolk. It does not necessarily denote a particular taste for that material.

• Lifestyler: Someone whose dominant/submissive inclinations and interactions extend beyond the bedroom or dungeon and into their daily lives. Such people are often said to be involved in what is called a 24/7.

• Lube: A slippery substance used to make sex or masturbation more comfortable and pleasurable. Water based lubes are probably the most used and are certainly the best choice for just about everything. It won't harm your sex toys, it works well with latex, and it feels more natural.

Ma - Mu

• Masochism: sexual pleasure obtained from receiving punishment (physical or psychological).

• Medical Fetish: a collection of sexual fetishes for objects, practices, environments, and situations of a medical or clinical nature.

• MILF: Mothers I'd Like to Fuck.

• Mind Fuck: Play whose focus is primarily mental/psychological, such as some kinds of roleplay. Also known as Head Games.

• Mummification: A bondage technique of completely or almost completely wrapping a submissive in restrictive material such as; plastic wrap, spandex, elastic or gauze bandages, etc.

• Munch: A munch is a low-pressure social gathering for people involved in or interested in BDSM, usually at a restaurant. When available, munches often use a private room.

Ne - Ot

• Needle Play: Play piercing, needle play, or recreational acupuncture is body piercing done for the purpose of enjoying the experience rather than producing a permanent body decoration.

• Objectification: Sexual arousal from any act in which one person is dehumanized or dehumanizes another.

• Oral Sex: Also called oral intercourse. Refers to contact of mouth or tongue with another person's genitals or sex organs.

• Orgasm Control: The practice whereby one person is not permitted to reach sexual orgasm without the permission of another person, or for a set period of time, or sometimes at all, even though that person may be permitted (or required) to engage in sexual activity or sex.

• OTK: Over The Knee.

Pa - Py

• Pain Slut: A masochist who derives pleasure from physical pain.

• Pansexual: Of or relating to all sexual orientations, sexes, and gender identities. One who engages in sexual or erotic activities with partners of all sexes and orientations.

• Pet play: Animal roleplay may be either a non-sexual or an erotic sexual role-play (when it may also be called petplay, ponyplay, ponyism, kittenplay, or pup-play). In its erotic sexual role-play form, one or more of the participants takes on the role of a real or imaginary animal in character, including appropriate mannerisms and behavior, and sometimes a partner will act as another animal, or, in a sexual context, may take the role of rider, trainer, or caretaker (or even breeding partner).

• Pee Play: see golden showers.

• Penis Pump: These are commonly sold from sex toy shops are are a device used to extend the length of a mans penis. They are usually a cylinder device which is placed over the penis and then the air is pumped out either manually or sometimes motorized to create a vacuum around the penis to draw more blood to it and resulting with it becoming engorged. Penis pumps can be used to help make a mans penis larger but excessive vacuum pressures can result in vascular damage.

• Play Party: A different kind of social gathering where people gather for the purpose of socializing and playing, and to watch others play.

• Polyamory: Any of various practices involving relationships with multiple partners with the knowledge and consent of all involved.

• Pony play: See pet play.

• Pornography: creative activity (writing or pictures or films etc.) of no literary or artistic value other than to stimulate sexual desire.

• Power Exchange: The commonly used term for play that involves some exchange of control or power. This can occur over the course of a SCENE or for a longer period of time.

• Pre-op transsexual: someone who has not yet undergone the operation, but is/has been taking hormones and preparing for the operation, and is for all intents and purposes fully reassigned.

• Punishment: Punishment is the practice of imposing something unpleasant or aversive on a person or animal or property, usually in response to disobedience, defiance, or behavior deemed morally wrong by individual, governmental, or religious principles.

• Puppy play: See pet play.

• PYL/pyl: Pick Your Label. In upper case for a top, in lower case for a bottom.

Ra - Ro

• RACK: Risk Aware Consensual Kink. See SSC.

• Resistance Play: See consensual non-consent.

• Role Play: Role-playing refers to the changing of one's behavior to assume a role, either unconsciously to fill a social role, or consciously to act out an adopted role.

Sa - Su

• Sadism: Sexual pleasure obtained by inflicting harm (physical or psychological) on others.

• Safeword: A safeword is a codeword or series of codewords that are sometimes used in BDSM for a submissive (or "bottom") to unambiguously communicate their physical or emotional state to a dominant (or "top"), typically when approaching, or crossing, a physical, emotional, or moral boundary.

• SAM: Smart Ass Masochist.

• Scat: The fetish involving sexual pleasure from feces.

• Scene: In BDSM, a scene is the stage or setting where BDSM activity takes place, as well as the activity itself.

• Service-oriented: A submissive who gets deep satisfaction from rendering service to a dominant, such as making their coffee, giving foot massages, etc. is said to be service-oriented.

• Shibari: Japanese bondage, involving rope bondage raised to an intricate and specialized art form.

• Singletail: signal whips and bullwhips, are examples of singletail whips. Usually when someone is talking about a singletips, a signal whip is what they are referring to. Singletail whips take much practice to use properly. Persons not yet competent enough to use the singletail (or the flogger) will often make the mistake of wrapping.

• Sissification: A practice desired by a male sub of 'forced' cross-dressing and/or gender reassignment.

• Sounding: the medical use of probes called sounds to increase the inner diameter of the urethra and to locate obstructions in it. Sounds are also used to stretch the urethra in order to receive piercing. Urethral sounding and urethral play are also used to refer to this practice in a sexual context.

• Spanking Bench/Horse: a bit like a sawhorse, usually padded and upholstered with leather, and with some kind of crosspiece added for leg-stability. Often there are hooks added as well so that the victim can be bound or hooked to it.

• Spivak Pronouns: a proposed set of gender-neutral pronouns in English devised by Michael Spivak. They are not in widespread use, but have been employed in gender-neutral language by some people who dislike the more common alternatives "he/she" or singular they.

• Spreader Bar: An implement consisting of a rigid bar or rod, often with attachment points for restraints built into it at each end, designed to be attached to a person's feet or ankles so as to hold the person's legs spread apart. May be adjustable in length.

• Squirting: see female ejaculation.

• SRP: Sexual Role Play

• SSC: Safe, sane, and consensual. See RACK.

• St. Andrews Cross: A large piece of furniture that is x-shaped, sometimes with a wooden base, sometimes just nailed or otherwise fastened to a wall. The pyl can then be stood up against it and bound to it through the conveniently placed eye bolts in the appropriate places. Also known as an x-frame.

• Strap-on: This is a term commonly used for a dildo which is attached / strapped to the user usually via a harness.

• Sub Drop: Feelings of sadness or anxiety that are sometimes experienced by a bottom after a scene.

• Sub Frenzy: A very strong, sometimes overwhelming, desire to find a dominant partner or to become immersed in BDSM-related activities, sometimes seen in people who identify strongly as submissive, particularly people who have either just newly discovered their submissive side or who have not partaken in BDSM-related activities for a long time. People in the grip of sub frenzy may sometimes make unwise or unsafe choices.

• Sub Space: Describes the state of a submissive's mental state while involved in serious play. Subspace is subjective, but is commonly described as a "floaty" feeling.

• Suspension: A bondage technique wherein the submissive's weight, totally or partially, is borne by the restraints used in the bondage.

Te - Tr

• Tens Unit: A device that delivers regular, low-grade electrical signals that distract or override pain signals. TENS stands for 'trans-cutaneous electrical stimulation'.

• Tit Torture: Tit torture refers to any of several erotic BDSM activities focusing solely on inflicting pain on the breast, nipples, and aureole for sexual gratification. It is often used in conjunction with breast bondage, which focuses on the restraint of the area.

• TMI: Too Much Information.

• Topping From the Bottom: The terms top, bottom and versatile are used to describe roles for the duration of a sexual act, or may be used more broadly as a psychological, social, and sexual identity, as well as indicating one's usual preference.

• tl;dr : Too long; didn't read.

• TPE: (Total Power Exchange) In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual (the submissive) gives to another (the dominant) ultimate authority over them.

• Training: Something a dominant does with a submissive. Training can be used to denote the teaching of certain cues, rules, and/or signals such as the system of whistle signals that the PYL trains the pyl to obey in a timely fashion.

• Transvestite: A transvestite is also someone who dresses up in the other gender’s clothes, but often the word has a different connotation. The difference is usually that this is way beyond a sexual turn-on, but actually more like a way of life. See cross dresser.

• Transsexual: Is someone who has reassigned their gender, or to put it more crudely, they’ve gone through the operation already.

• Troll: Someone who posts controversial and usually irrelevant or off-topic messages in an online community, such as an online discussion forum or chat room, with the intention of baiting other users into an emotional response or to generally disrupt normal on-topic discussion.

Ur - Vo

• Urine Play: See golden showers.

• Vampire Gloves: A pair of gloves, most often lightweight leather driving gloves, that have metal prickly things on the inside. These can range from metal snaps to tacks.

• Vanilla: Vanilla sex (or conventional sex) is a description of what a culture regards as standard or conventional sexual behavior.

• Vibrator: This is a sex toy usually shaped in the style of a penis and can be similar to a dildo but it vibrates.

• Violet Wand: A device used for electrical play consisting of a handle, which contains a high-voltage coil called an “Oudin coil,” and several interchangeable electrodes, most commonly made of glass and filled with a gas which glows a brilliant purple in the presence of an electrical field. Used in electroplay.

• Voyeurism: A viewer who enjoys seeing the sex acts or sex organs of others.

Wa - Wr

• Wartenburg Wheel: A metal handle with a free-spinning pinwheel with saw-like "teeth" attached, and it can be used gently or more firmly. Also called a Neural Wheel or Nero Wheel.

• Watersport: See golden showers.

• Wax Play: Wax play is a form of sensual play involving warm or hot wax usually dripped from candles or ladled onto a person's naked skin. Wax play may be combined with other BDSM or sexual activity.

• Weights: Lead fishing weights or other weights hung from clamps that are attached to the body to increase torment.

• Wrapping: a term for miscalculating your throw so that the tip of the whip actually lands in a place you did not aim at. The skill of wrapping intentionally is often the sign of someone who -really- knows what they are doing. Most wrapping is not done intentionally, however. Nasty bruises on a pyl's hips are one sign that someone hasn’t quite mastered their whip yet.