Dear X,

[imemkay]

Dear Target of Pester-Power,

I share your pain.

However, winding forwards twenty or thirty years, what goes around comes around. That's all I'm saying.

Your's,

The reproductive imperative is not to become a parent but rather a grand-parent, and parenthood is a phase one must go through - Litster.

Dear Future Grandparent,

Egads! Grandparent-hood is a long way off for me! Although, I am sure I will the coolest grandmother ever, you know, in like 25 years.

And yes, what goes around comes around. I, for one, can't wait to sit back and watch and laugh!

Yours,
Let's Not Go Rushing Things, Litster

 

[imemkay]

Dear Ed Sheeran,

Why does your song, Kiss Me, always bring a few tears to my eyes?

Seriously considering removing you from the playlist!

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Playlist Editing Litster,

Don't be so sad. Revel in the fact that as humans, we are able to experience such emotions, and be thankful for the joy and happiness that is the opposite of the sadness that particular song evokes in you.

So, rather than deleting this part of the hairy songsmith's oeuvre from your playlist, why not follow it up with something emotionally uplifting such as this or even this?

Your's,

This is not really representative of my musical taste Litster.

 

[imemkay]

Dear Sophisticated Music Lover,

I think you are very wise. The Birdie Song brought tears to my eyes as well; tears from laughter. I haven't laughed that hard in a while, and I thank you!! I shall add it to my playlist at once!

Your's,

Now in a very silly mood Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Silly Mood Litster,

Did you do the dance??

Yours,

The world needs to know this Litster

 

[imemkay]

Dear Silly Mood Litster,

Did you do the dance??

Yours,

The world needs to know this Litster

Dear Inquisitive Litster,

You know I did the dance! The question is, did you do the dance? Who could hear that song and not do the dance???

Yours,

Dancing Like a Fool Litster

 

[mwmnpa]

Dear Neighbor,

I see you out there walking your dog. I also see you're keeping to your side of the property line. Very good, you've learned a lesson.

I didn't even need to call Dimitri or Mad Freddy!

Smug Neighbor

Dear Neighbor,

Well played!

Waiting For Another Storm Litster

 

[imemkay]

Dear Neighbor,

Well played!

Waiting For Another Storm Litster

Dear Litster on Storm Watch,

Thanks! I'm glad it worked!

Hoping the forecast is wrong and we don't get snow Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Litster on Storm Watch,

Thanks! I'm glad it worked!

Hoping the forecast is wrong and we don't get snow Litster

Dear Bobble-hatted, Snow-watch Litster,

Time to stock up on the hot chocolate and cognac?

Yours,

I love building snowmen Litster

 

[imemkay]

Dear Bobble-hatted, Snow-watch Litster,

Time to stock up on the hot chocolate and cognac?

Yours,

I love building snowmen Litster

Dear Sculptor of Snowmen,

I always have hot chocolate in the house. Do you like marshamallow in your cocoa? If I run out and get some cognac, will you help me with a snowman?

Yours,
Suddenly Looking Forward to this Nor'easter Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Sculptor of Snowmen,

I always have hot chocolate in the house. Do you like marshamallow in your cocoa? If I run out and get some cognac, will you help me with a snowman?

Yours,
Suddenly Looking Forward to this Nor'easter Litster

Dear Well-prepared Litster,

In my hot choc' I'll take whatever you can offer. As for helping with your snowman, there is little I won't do for cognac.

Do you prefer carrots or coal for your snowman's nose?

Yours,

Wooly mitts and scarf at the ready Litster.

 

[Saucyminx]

Guys, I think I have an idea for your snowman nose. . .

 

[imemkay]

Dear Well-prepared Litster,

In my hot choc' I'll take whatever you can offer. As for helping with your snowman, there is little I won't do for cognac.

Do you prefer carrots or coal for your snowman's nose?

Yours,

Wooly mitts and scarf at the ready Litster.

Dear Bundled Up Litster,

Just added cognac to my shopping list!

Usually, I go with a carrot for the nose. However, you're the pro, I'll defer to your wisdom.

Yours,
Now searching for a top hot and pipe for our frosty friend Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Guys, I think I have an idea for your snowman nose. . .

Dear Original Thinker,

Do your Snowman Competitions have an adult section?

Yours,

This could lead to some difficult questions from the neighbourhood kids Litster

Dear Bundled Up Litster,

Just added cognac to my shopping list!

Usually, I go with a carrot for the nose. However, you're the pro, I'll defer to your wisdom.

Yours,
Now searching for a top hot and pipe for our frosty friend Litster

Dear Snowman Torturer Litster,

A 'Top Hot'!! What has Mr Frosty done to make you so angry?

Yours,

I'm shocked and heartbroken Litster

 

[imemkay]

Dear Snowman Torturer Litster,

A 'Top Hot'!! What has Mr Frosty done to make you so angry?

Yours,

I'm shocked and heartbroken Litster

Dear Shocked Litster,

I didn't mean to break your heart! Don't cry! You know my difficulties with this magic phone of mine! I love frosty and would never hurt him.

Yours,
Frustrated by Typos Litster

 

[imemkay]

Guys, I think I have an idea for your snowman nose. . .

Dear Original Thinker,

HAHAHA Yeah, I'd have to grab that "nose" back pretty quick. I couldn't do without mine for too long!!

Owner of nose-less snowman Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Shocked Litster,

I didn't mean to break your heart! Don't cry! You know my difficulties with this magic phone of mine! I love frosty and would never hurt him.

Yours,
Frustrated by Typos Litster

Dear Cellphone Operating While Wearing Mittens Litster,

Sorry for doubting you, and accusing you of crimes against frostanity.

Yours,

Heart repaired and pumping once again Litster.

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Original Thinker,

HAHAHA Yeah, I'd have to grab that "nose" back pretty quick. I couldn't do without mine for too long!!

Owner of nose-less snowman Litster

Dear temporarily deprived Litster,

Can I suggest you warm it up before use.

Yours,

Can't bear the screams Litster.

 

[Saucyminx]

Dear Original Thinker,

HAHAHA Yeah, I'd have to grab that "nose" back pretty quick. I couldn't do without mine for too long!!

Owner of nose-less snowman Litster

That is why one should always have a spare. . . or 2 . . . or 3. . .

*Makes self note to call sex toy home demo party lady to set up another party*

 

[Saucyminx]

Dear sweater dress,

Why must you cling so ferociously to my large rump? Seriously, give it a rest will you?

yanking self-consciously at skirt litster

 

[imemkay]

Dear temporarily deprived Litster,

Can I suggest you warm it up before use.

Yours,

Can't bear the screams Litster.

Dear Healhy Hearted Once Again Litster

I'm glad you realize I would never hurt our frosty friend.

As for warming the "nose" before use.....haven't you ever played with ice cubes before??

Trying Hard to Stifle the Screams Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Healhy Hearted Once Again Litster

I'm glad you realize I would never hurt our frosty friend.

As for warming the "nose" before use.....haven't you ever played with ice cubes before??

Trying Hard to Stifle the Screams Litster

Dear Muffled Litster,

Cubes yes 'Bergs, noooooooo

Yours,

Recalling pleasant memories Litster.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Rainshine,

Stop living 16 hours in the future. Come back to normal, American time.

Living in the past,

Pmann

 

[imemkay]

Dear Muffled Litster,

Cubes yes 'Bergs, noooooooo

Yours,

Recalling pleasant memories Litster.

Dear Reminiscing Litster,

That made me laugh out loud! Unfortunately, I happen to be working at the moment. My co-worker now thinks I am insane and is quite angry that I won't let her in on the joke.
However, I am glad I could help you recall such pleasant memories.

Yours,
Tittering Litster

 

[NightL]

from the future as well - to whomever - Go rim a rat! ™pmann

edit: repaired to avoid above advice being directed at me