Couples: Frequency of BDSM vs. vanilla sex?
As much as I enjoy getting kinky, my experience is that it takes notably more time, especially around planning. negotiating, set-up/clean-up, and aftercare. It's certainly worth it for the thrill, but sometimes we just don't have the time and energy to go that route - Sometimes we just want a quickie before the roommate gets home, or a morning romp before work. I also find that kinky sex tends to be on the "fun fucking" end of the spectrum rather than the "emotional lovemaking" end. I think both types are important in a substantive relationship.
Particularly those of you in established relationships, how do you find the balance between kink and vanilla in your sexual relationship, and how much of each do you tend to have relative to the other?
As much as I enjoy getting kinky, my experience is that it takes notably more time, especially around planning. negotiating, set-up/clean-up, and aftercare. It's certainly worth it for the thrill, but sometimes we just don't have the time and energy to go that route - Sometimes we just want a quickie before the roommate gets home, or a morning romp before work. I also find that kinky sex tends to be on the "fun fucking" end of the spectrum rather than the "emotional lovemaking" end. I think both types are important in a substantive relationship.
Particularly those of you in established relationships, how do you find the balance between kink and vanilla in your sexual relationship, and how much of each do you tend to have relative to the other?
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