Cheesy Pick-Up lines

[PrincessHoney]

mmmmmmmmmm

heres another rude one....

"i'd only kick you out of bed so i could f**k you on the floor"

 

[midwestyankee]

GOD I wish my mom would have been as cool as you when she was subbing.

Try getting your own MOTHER subbing in your GYM CLASS!!

I was in hell for the rest of the year. It NEVER got forgotten.

Ang

My best friend in college had a similar experience. His mother occasionally taught at his high school too. No fun at all. That's one of the reasons why we intentionally live in a different school district than the one where my wife teaches.

 

[logan ross]

c'mon people where are all the cheesy pick up lines?
i need more ammo for the weekend.

here is one that never works: "if i said you had a beautiful body would ou swallow 10 inches"?
upon rejection simple reply " i wouldn't fold it half anyway".

2) walk up to your target grap the back of there top and look at the label inside the collar, when asked what are you doing reply "just seeing if your made in heaven"

 

[midwestyankee]

So, you want cheesy, eh? Let me see what I can do...


Hi there. I've been looking for the swiss to go with my ham all night and I'm so glad I found you.

Hello, my beautiful little fontinella. Aren't you smooth looking tonight.

Say, beautiful, how much fondue you think we could have together if we just got naked and dipped into each other?

Sweetheart, I've been storing up strength in my roquefort you for almost a week.

Do you mind if I gently touch your cheek? I love the velveeta feel of a beautiful young woman's cheek.

I'm a little blue and you have been so gouda listen to me.



Sorry, that's all I can come up with for right now. And unless you all pony up something valuable, I'll make up a dozen more real soon.

 

[CelticFrog]

*guffaw*

Nope... I wanna SEE YOU come up with a dozen more. I DARE YOU to do it.



Okay... let's see.

Nope. Can't think of any. Brain has melted.

I'll ponder.

Ang

 

[wideeyedgrin]

Have you ever seen the little cards that say

Date Card - If you keep it, I get a date,
If you give it back, I get a kiss,
If you tear it up, I get both.

When do I collect?

 

[midwestyankee]

*guffaw*

Nope... I wanna SEE YOU come up with a dozen more. I DARE YOU to do it.



Okay... let's see.

Nope. Can't think of any. Brain has melted.

I'll ponder.

Ang

Sweetheart, I have a beaufort you, and he is standing right here in my shoes.

Lovely one, the brie-lyant shine in your eyes tells me that you are the end of my rainbow.

Hey sugar, wanna camembert to my place and spread out on my cracker?

Look, I don't want to be the goat of the evening or anything, so how about you just not slap me and we'll call it even?

Sweetie, I see that your friend over there looks a little sad, How about if we gorgonzola her? I always feel better after making someone feel better, you know what I mean?

Look, I'm not the kind of guy to string a girl along. When I like her, I tell her. I'm just a plain American singles kind of guy.

Look closely at my hand, beautiful. When I open my parmigiano look you in the eye and tell you just how beautiful you really are.

You, my lovely one, are the soufflé at the end of a gourmet meal compared to all the others here tonight.

Honey, which would you rather do: take a slow limo ride to paradise, or cheddar way to Vegas and maybe get married?

Beautiful, I just had to walk over here to tell you that as soon as you walked in the room, I gruyere in my pants and now it's hard to walk.

Hi there, Snow White, how'd you like to come visit my little cottage in the woods? I promise I'm not a dwarf.

 

[CelticFrog]

Oh.
My.
God.

*wiping the tears from her eyes*

You are my hero.

(but only if you came up with those on your own)
Ang

 

[midwestyankee]

I'm only mildly embarrassed to say, yes, these are all the invention of this one little twisted mind.

 

[sheath]

Hey sugar, wanna camembert to my place and spread out on my cracker?

Look, I don't want to be the goat of the evening or anything, so how about you just not slap me and we'll call it even?

LOL

They are all great, but THOSE are priceless.

S.

 

[PrincessHoney]

legs is the word....

lets spread the word!

 

[sheath]

Two that made me laugh out loud...

"There is a big reason I don't play a mandolin."

"You think I can play this instrument that well, imagine how well I could play YOU." (That one has actually worked. *blushing*)

Among others, but if I think about them now I might get horny.



S.

 

[mitchboot]

Is your dad in jail? Because he stole the stars and put them in your eyes.

Do you wash your pants in windex? Because I can see myself in them.

 

[midwestyankee]

No cheese this time, I promise.

(After someone approaches because I have given them the "come hither" signal with my finger) Look at that. I made you come with just one finger. Imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

No cheese (but not original either - someone used it on me).

 

[CelticFrog]

(After someone approaches because I have given them the "come hither" signal with my finger) Look at that. I made you come with just one finger.

It never fails. I always fall for this one, even though I know what the result will be.

J's supervisor, when Alekz and I go visit him at work, ALWAYS pulls that on me. In front of J.

And then he turns to J and says, "Hey look -- I can make your wife come with one finger. Feel inadequate?"

Which, of course, always always always leads to a nice little war of words between the two that has the entire office rolling by the end. Those two are absolutely hilarious together.

Ang

 

[firefighter02]

I need a nap...can I use your pillows?

 

[hook848]

"I'll bet I can flip you and dip you before you can throw me and blow me."

 

[DLL]

ok heres a few cheesy pick up lines.......

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.


Do you know what'd look good on you? Me.


Do you wash your panties with Windex? Because I can really see myself in them

There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?

ok how are those....


ducks before a tomatoe hits me....

 

[midwestyankee]

ok heres a few cheesy pick up lines.......

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.


Do you know what'd look good on you? Me.


Do you wash your panties with Windex? Because I can really see myself in them

There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?

ok how are those....


ducks before a tomatoe hits me....

How about this one: Hi, I'm Dan Quayle. Wanna go spell with me?

 

[DLL]

heres more......
Do you believe guys think with their dick? (Yeah.) Well, in that case, will you blow my mind?

I have a job for you.... but it blows...

What's your favorite position on extramarital sex?

You're daddy must be an archer because he sure shot a bulls eye!
Your daddy must play the trumpet, because he sure made me horny!


yes i heard a few corny lines in my day....

 

[logan ross]

So, you want cheesy, eh? Let me see what I can do...


Hi there. I've been looking for the swiss to go with my ham all night and I'm so glad I found you.

Hello, my beautiful little fontinella. Aren't you smooth looking tonight.

Say, beautiful, how much fondue you think we could have together if we just got naked and dipped into each other?

Sweetheart, I've been storing up strength in my roquefort you for almost a week.

Do you mind if I gently touch your cheek? I love the velveeta feel of a beautiful young woman's cheek.

I'm a little blue and you have been so gouda listen to me.



Sorry, that's all I can come up with for right now. And unless you all pony up something valuable, I'll make up a dozen more real soon.

ok i asked for that! but they gouda been better!

how about these

i lost my teddy bear. will you sleep with me?

exuse me, do you have a band-aid because i scaped my knee when i feel for you.

i hope you have a libary card because i'm checking you out.

your tag says made in the USA, but i could have sworn you were made in heaven.

hey, there real nice clothes, can i talk you out of them.

how do like your eggs, poached, scambled or fertilized.

my love for you is like diarrhea, i just cant hold it in.

your parents must be retarded, because your so special.

if you were a burger at Mc donalds, they would call you
Mc beautiful.

do you beleive in love at first sight or should i walk pass again.