Arizona: Is a straight, submissive, voyeur, CD a thing?

[azlit]

One of my multiple kinks is CD'ing and a fantasy I've had for many years is finding another guy that is into CD'ing but who is also a submissive, voyeur.

Let me explain my kink first and maybe some could help me to understand why I will never accomplish this.

I'm not bi, I'm not wanting to try bi, have zero interest in trying to be intimate with another man but would love to have a friend I can enjoy this kinky side with on other levels.

I would like to correspond, sharing a little about our lives, the things we're doing including indulging in our naughty pastimes. Hopefully, we would have other things in common so could become friends, go off doing things and of course finding ways to include our little fetishes.

If we ever got to dress together, I would want to enjoy the experience of doing this with someone else that totally understands it and where our fun would at most be jerking off to porn, pictures, fantasies but not getting intimate.

I would have fun sharing my sexy wife's panties now and then, to get that reaction or to hear how he might have enjoyed jerking off while wearing her panties.

Can my fantasy be considered BDSM?

I can be a bit of an alpha male, like doing things my way. I certainly welcome input and ideas but I might still want to do things my way. It would also be fun to tell my friend to wear panties and something else underneath while we are out having drinks etc.

Now that you know my fantasy, why is this something I've never been able to achieve? I've advertised on at least a dozen different personals sites but always get guys that say they are ok with my not wanting to be intimate but it's always BS, it's absolutely what they want and thought I could be talked into it in the heat of the moment or something.

If there is any site out there that could provide some kind of understanding of why I will never accomplish this, it's got to be this one.

 

[azlit]

I guess this is the wrong site or forum to post this on?

 

[IrisAlthea]

I guess this is the wrong site or forum to post this on?

Yes, try the personals down the hall. I’m guessing a mod will move it, so don’t think you need to make a new thread though.

 

[azlit]

While I wrote this as a personal ad, it's not. It's wanting to reach out to others who feel similarly. I've already got an ad in the personals .

 

[sub2femdom]

I think your biggest issue is that you are saying "I want to dip my toes in the water", while at the same time telling potential partners that you will only ever want to dip your toes in the water. It's a no-win for nearly everyone who would ideally be interested in playing with you.

You need to ask yourself what you are offering others while still being able to fulfill your needs. Understand the difference between wants and needs.

 

[SissySalina]

With all you listed, please describe what you are calling "voyeur". Can understand CD and Submissive as to what you want but not the voyeur part.

 

[azlit]

I think your biggest issue is that you are saying "I want to dip my toes in the water", while at the same time telling potential partners that you will only ever want to dip your toes in the water. It's a no-win for nearly everyone who would ideally be interested in playing with you.

You need to ask yourself what you are offering others while still being able to fulfill your needs. Understand the difference between wants and needs.

Actually, I make it completely clear that I am not interested in dipping toes, if you mean trying bi. I specifically tell anyone responding that I'm not testing the waters. Not all people are testing, some know specifically what they don't want or do want.

>You need to ask yourself what you are offering others while still being able
>to fulfill your needs. Understand the difference between wants and needs.

Ah but I do know what I'm offering and make no mystery about it. Simply friendship. I'm not asking someone to give me something one sided, I'm saying I'd like to find someone that is similar to myself. However, it seems that almost all CD's have this need to try bi rather than just enjoying the kink.

The point of my post is there seem to be few like me who would be interested in knowing another CD but not interested in being intimate.

 

[azlit]

With all you listed, please describe what you are calling "voyeur". Can understand CD and Submissive as to what you want but not the voyeur part.

You're right, I don't seem to get into details about that . I would call myself or one of my kinks being a voyeur. If a woman or a couple would enjoy having a voyeur as a friend, I could be that person I like watching, I like porn such as images, short video clips and would enjoy someone who is similar.

 

[sub2femdom]

The point of my post is there seem to be few like me who would be interested in knowing another CD but not interested in being intimate.

Actually if you offer just ^THAT^ as your interest and skip all of the specific kink details, you should find plenty of sissies and CD's who are interested in this type of friendship. Many of (us) aren't interested in playing sexually with other CD's and sissies, but enjoy the friendship(s).

Being too specific in a dating profile, much like you are in your original post, can do more damage than good.

 

[azlit]

>Actually if you offer just ^THAT^ as your interest and skip all of the specific kink >details, you should find plenty of sissies and CD's who are interested in this type >of friendship. Many of (us) aren't interested in playing sexually with other CD's >and sissies, but enjoy the friendship(s).

I didn't post to be edited on how I ask for things .

I've made it clear. I'd love to find a straight friend that enjoys CD'ing for what it is, no need to tell the world, no need to find support, he just enjoys it as the kink it is. To some it's more which is fine by me since I've seen that TG's have to go through but I'm not interested in anything more.

My post was my being interested in hearing from others that feel the same way, have had similar experiences, never finding someone like that, nothing else.

 

[sub2femdom]

>Actually if you offer just ^THAT^ as your interest and skip all of the specific kink >details, you should find plenty of sissies and CD's who are interested in this type >of friendship. Many of (us) aren't interested in playing sexually with other CD's >and sissies, but enjoy the friendship(s).

I didn't post to be edited on how I ask for things .

I've made it clear. I'd love to find a straight friend that enjoys CD'ing for what it is, no need to tell the world, no need to find support, he just enjoys it as the kink it is. To some it's more which is fine by me since I've seen that TG's have to go through but I'm not interested in anything more.

My post was my being interested in hearing from others that feel the same way, have had similar experiences, never finding someone like that, nothing else.

I'm just trying to be helpful and offer some advice. That's fine if you don't want it.

 

[azlit]

I welcome all interesting and related experiences but so far, most are only editing what I said or breaking it down. I didn't post to be edited, I posted looking to hear from others that have had similar experiences, to better understand if being a straight CD is kind of a rare thing.

Maybe it's just that straight CD's have no interest in being with other men at all. I don't know, it's why I posted.