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dutchrain said:
I did not mind the pings and pangs I felt when I read that book right after the hysterectomy! It really made me laugh out loud a few times and I giggled a lot.

There is second one now, I don't know if it is a sequel, but it seems to be in the same style: "The Girl who Saved the King of Sweden"
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Thanks both - I have read the 100yr old man and cried with laughter - it's brilliant... not much of an association for you though :(
I'm keeping an eye out for the next book - it's cheap on Spamazon

I got a second hand paperback today ... Out Stealing Horses by Per Petterson - I liked the title - I'm shallow like that
 
stickygirl said:
I think the partner in an already-married couple requires the written permission to have their gender considered by the panel ( and so have their birth cert changed ). Some have objected to this on principle, but in practise I think it's a reasonable request given that, say a woman has married a man who then transitions to a trans woman: there are a number of examples where this has been done happily, but personally I think it's pretty unfair on the cis-gender partner, and doesn't say much for their marriage… but then I suppose there's the whole thing about custody of any children… I'm seeing it from a single person's POV.
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Yeah, it's a difficult situation all round - "this is not what I signed up for" territory. But I've seen concerns that the rule could easily be abused, and it's not consistent with the degree of control that spouses are granted over other life decisions.

If Bob and Carol are married, and Bob decides he wants to go work in backwoods Albania, or get a vasectomy even though they'd agreed they both wanted kids, or have consensual sex with Carol's best friend, Carol doesn't get a veto. If she feels Bob's made their marriage untenable, it's up to her to file for divorce. By my understanding, Bob can even go on HRT and have SRS without needing Carol's permission - and if transitioning is going to destroy the marriage in Carol's eyes, you'd think that would be enough.

But if Bob transitions to Barbara and wants that legally recognised... if Carol's feeling vengeful enough, she may be able to drag the divorce proceedings out for a very long time. It seems weird that Barbara can move out, get a new job, find a new partner, etc etc even without initiating divorce proceedings, but can't get gender recognition.

(Although now I think about it, I don't actually know how Australian law handles this situation!)
 
Bramblethorn said:
Yeah, it's a difficult situation all round - "this is not what I signed up for" territory. But I've seen concerns that the rule could easily be abused, and it's not consistent with the degree of control that spouses are granted over other life decisions.

If Bob and Carol are married, and Bob decides he wants to go work in backwoods Albania, or get a vasectomy even though they'd agreed they both wanted kids, or have consensual sex with Carol's best friend, Carol doesn't get a veto. If she feels Bob's made their marriage untenable, it's up to her to file for divorce. By my understanding, Bob can even go on HRT and have SRS without needing Carol's permission - and if transitioning is going to destroy the marriage in Carol's eyes, you'd think that would be enough.

But if Bob transitions to Barbara and wants that legally recognised... if Carol's feeling vengeful enough, she may be able to drag the divorce proceedings out for a very long time. It seems weird that Barbara can move out, get a new job, find a new partner, etc etc even without initiating divorce proceedings, but can't get gender recognition.

(Although now I think about it, I don't actually know how Australian law handles this situation!)
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Phew! I hope they are both OK?? An update please. Did they manage to work out their difficulties? Is Bob now Barbara?

(Sorry;))

Sticky, was there a point in time that the re-assurance of a loving partner would have made you re-consider re-assignment? Would Bob and Carol have had problems if they had adjusted to each others needs?? When does the chemical overtake the balm of support from another??
 
Thanks Bram. While the birth certifcate is important, it isn't the be all and end all. For instance, if you are born after 1983, you can apply for a passport using your parents birth certificate, so Barbara can still head off to Albania. As for divorce proceedings - I don't see that as being a specifically trans issue: people drag out divorces for years anyway. I'm pretty happy with the law on paper even if its implementation via Policeman Plod is from the last century.

Pops "was there a point in time that the re-assurance of a loving partner would have made you re-consider re-assignment?"
No.
It's my decision, for me. Me, me, me :)
 
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Bramblethorn said:
Can you tell them something like "I'll need some time out during the day for exercises prescribed by my doctor"? I don't know what UK employment law is like, but in .au an employer would normally be required to accommodate that.
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Since we talking about earlier, I found a declaration by the Norwegian courts banning forced sterilisation, but this is only after the HRC made it's views known ( and Sweden did the same ).
 
Sticky just wanted to give a quick update shoulder x-rays came back no bone issue. Not really a big surprise there. Now it is be a good solder and wait for the physical therapist to get back to me on my pt schedule. Good news I will start my new drugs 💊 tomorrow hopefully they help.
 
warl0ck1 said:
Sticky just wanted to give a quick update shoulder x-rays came back no bone issue. Not really a big surprise there. Now it is be a good solder and wait for the physical therapist to get back to me on my pt schedule. Good news I will start my new drugs 💊 tomorrow hopefully they help.
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That's good news in one way (not bone probs) but tendons & their attachments can be stubborn things to get right - you'll have to be patient. From what I hear, don't have the steroid injections - they are last resort and can weaken the tendons in the process. I'm a quack physio and know all sorts of useless info on these things :) Hopefully the physio is a good one.
 
Hey there sticks. Glad to see things are still progressing. I missed keeping up with you. :rose::kiss:
 
stickygirl said:
That's good news in one way (not bone probs) but tendons & their attachments can be stubborn things to get right - you'll have to be patient. From what I hear, don't have the steroid injections - they are last resort and can weaken the tendons in the process. I'm a quack physio and know all sorts of useless info on these things :) Hopefully the physio is a good one.
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I did cortisone in my left knee some 25 years ago. I do not want to do that again.
 
Mr Tom :rose:
...and Mr W :heart: yep - stay away from the steely needle :eek:

maybe we should start a triage here?! I can include myself - things have not been going too well with Mr Darcy and me, though I'm told bleeding isn't that usual... :eek:
 
stickygirl said:
Mr Tom :rose:
...and Mr W :heart: yep - stay away from the steely needle :eek:

maybe we should start a triage here?! I can include myself - things have not been going too well with Mr Darcy and me, though I'm told bleeding isn't that usual... :eek:
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Oh honey!!! *hugs you tight*
 
stickygirl said:
Mr Tom :rose:
...and Mr W :heart: yep - stay away from the steely needle :eek:

maybe we should start a triage here?! I can include myself - things have not been going too well with Mr Darcy and me, though I'm told bleeding isn't that usual... :eek:
Click to expand...

Group hug. A big squeeze for sticky. :rose: :kiss:
 
stickygirl said:
Thanks both - I have read the 100yr old man and cried with laughter - it's brilliant... not much of an association for you though :(
I'm keeping an eye out for the next book - it's cheap on Spamazon

I got a second hand paperback today ... Out Stealing Horses by Per Petterson - I liked the title - I'm shallow like that
Click to expand...

Hey, here's one for you!

http://www.amazon.com/Loving-Mr-Darcy-Journeys-Pemberley/dp/1402217412

(not actually, I've read some of it and it was REALLY terrible.)
 
stickygirl said:
Mr Tom :rose:
...and Mr W :heart: yep - stay away from the steely needle :eek:

maybe we should start a triage here?! I can include myself - things have not been going too well with Mr Darcy and me, though I'm told bleeding isn't that usual... :eek:
Click to expand...

Take care of your special self and hugs from a long way away.
 
stickygirl said:
I can include myself - things have not been going too well with Mr Darcy and me, though I'm told bleeding isn't that usual... :eek:
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Oh no!!!
I'm so sorry to hear that it hasn't been smooth sailing with you and Mr Darcy.
That sucks!!

I have been off the forum for a while but I've been wondering how you are doing so logged on today.

I really hope it's not anything serious and it is all better soon.
 
Erochic said:
Oh no!!!
I'm so sorry to hear that it hasn't been smooth sailing with you and Mr Darcy.
That sucks!!

I have been off the forum for a while but I've been wondering how you are doing so logged on today.

I really hope it's not anything serious and it is all better soon.
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Hiya. :rose:
 
Thanks both :kiss:
Yea it's a roller coaster for sure: the frustration of having to temporarily stop dilation v the upset of bleeding and contradictory medical advice. It's difficult to stay positive tbh.

I shouldn't be impatient - I know it'll take a little while to get through this but it has to work out right in the end.
 
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