How To Kill A Date In Four Words...

[loquere]

I am Jesus Christ

 

[loquere]

What's that rancid smell?

 

[jezzilee]

No sex til marriage.

 

[jezzilee]

No sex til marriage.

Yes, oral is sex

 

[TxRad]

BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG!

Too literal, uh?

 

[Hypoxia]

Did that hurt much?

 

[Kantarii]

Anal sex is betterKant

 

[Kantarii]

That wasn't my finger.

 

[Lia Monde]

Burger King or Qdoba's?

 

[Handley_Page]

Quickly; it's the wife.

 

[Kimikimidoll]

My husband was better

 

[Lia Monde]

Meet my inflatable doll.

 

[MamasChastityBoy]

"Aliens replaced my penis."

...actually, that might just spark curiosity with the right people...

"You'll fit in a suitcase." (Okay, it's five. Sue me.)

 

[ChloeTzang]

"Aliens replaced my penis"

But its not hard.

 

[My I]

My rash is oozing.

 

[ChloeTzang]

My rash is oozing.

Yeeeech. Okay, you win. I am so outa here. Keep the panties as a present. Rotflmao at that one. Now I need to floss that image out of my mind. Sooooooo gross. I can't even think of another one after that.

And a whole day later I'm still laughing. Yes, that'd kill a date for sure.

 

[Lia Monde]

My last date died.

 

[Emily124]

"Mom?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm pregnant."

 

[KindofHere]

...........

 

[Handley_Page]

What DO you mean ?

 

[ChloeTzang]

What DO you mean ?

THAT little thing? Bwwwwaaaaahhhaaaaahaaaaa.

 

[Handley_Page]

THAT little thing? Bwwwwaaaaahhhaaaaahaaaaa.

I have a cold !

 

[holliday1960]

I have a cold !

My hobby is proctology.

 

[ChloeTzang]

My hobby is proctology.

Proctologist? Look at this!

 

[chocolategirl74]

I voted for Trump.