Your best or your worst PM or IM opening lines... and if you want your reactions ...

[Aquagal]

Actually there are two. The first one, recently said one word:

POKE - *what the hell was that supposed to mean...like in the eye or something *


The other was a while ago.

Someone pm'd me that he could cause me to have an orgasm without touching myself or describing what I would do to him.


OKAY... I told him if he had that ability, he was wasting his time on LIT...and reminded him of the old saying about if something seemed to good to be true, it usually was...

There's only one person that I know that PMs POKE. Yeah, not very thought provoking.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Just got my second one from this guy:

fun?
Hey there! How are you today? I'm xxxx, a charming, funny, good looking and fit 28.m from Atlanta-I have brown hair, blue eyes, 6'0 and fit. I thought I would say hello, and see what you were up to today?

My friends know me as the smart and driven one of the group, always at work or up to something-- but they have no idea how far my sexual side goes- nor do they have any idea how horny or kinky I am. I'd love to chat and have some fun.

I love to run, be outside, watch sports, read, go out with friends, and I have a bit of a sarcastic streak. I hope we can chat soon.

I hope to hear from you soon.

xxxxxx

Yahoo: xxxxxxxxx

I didn't respond last time so I'm contemplating this as a response and decided to send it. *sigh*

Hi xxxx,

My name is not RedHairedandFriendly, it's actually --- oh wait, I probably should remain all mysterious for you. I am funny, charming, good-looking and moderately fit (let's be honest here - who really cares if we're fit or not, in the land of cyberville) -- In fact let's go all out...

I'm 23 years old, red hair down to my ass, the curls skate across my bottom, and make the perfect silky rope for you to grab on to as you try to be that kinky man you hide from your friends. I'm five foot nine (why be too short, or too tall - right). I've got the darkest green eyes you've ever seen, men have died just for the right to look into my sexy orbs of sin.

I'm glad you said hello, because I have never before received a PM as witty and fun loving as the one you sent me. Well, I have - just once, it was from you but I ignored it. Obviously I was wrong to, because you have portrayed yourself as my dream man. I'm sure you know exactly what I'm looking for. In cyberville you can be anything I want - right?

I love to chat and have fun too, and kinky - baby you have no idea how kinky I can be. You'll have to wait in line because my cyber box is so stuffed right now; hell baby, I'm so kinky I had to create a lottery system and you're number hasn't come up yet.

I love nature walks, camping and walking along the beach holding hands and stroking my pet poodle as she peeks out from my purse. Oh wait that's Paris and a bald pooch that yaps a lot. Sorry was distracted by the fantasy of myself.

I'm not sarcastic in the least, please feel free to check out this thread if you doubt me.

~ RHF

 

[rbijon]

Just got my second one from this guy:

fun?
Hey there! How are you today? I'm xxxx, a charming, funny, good looking and fit 28.m from Atlanta-I have brown hair, blue eyes, 6'0 and fit. I thought I would say hello, and see what you were up to today?

My friends know me as the smart and driven one of the group, always at work or up to something-- but they have no idea how far my sexual side goes- nor do they have any idea how horny or kinky I am. I'd love to chat and have some fun.

I love to run, be outside, watch sports, read, go out with friends, and I have a bit of a sarcastic streak. I hope we can chat soon.

I hope to hear from you soon.

xxxxxx

Yahoo: xxxxxxxxx

I didn't respond last time so I'm contemplating this as a response and decided to send it. *sigh*

Hi xxxx,

My name is not RedHairedandFriendly, it's actually --- oh wait, I probably should remain all mysterious for you. I am funny, charming, good-looking and moderately fit (let's be honest here - who really cares if we're fit or not, in the land of cyberville) -- In fact let's go all out...

I'm 23 years old, red hair down to my ass, the curls skate across my bottom, and make the perfect silky rope for you to grab on to as you try to be that kinky man you hide from your friends. I'm five foot nine (why be too short, or too tall - right). I've got the darkest green eyes you've ever seen, men have died just for the right to look into my sexy orbs of sin.

I'm glad you said hello, because I have never before received a PM as witty and fun loving as the one you sent me. Well, I have - just once, it was from you but I ignored it. Obviously I was wrong to, because you have portrayed yourself as my dream man. I'm sure you know exactly what I'm looking for. In cyberville you can be anything I want - right?

I love to chat and have fun too, and kinky - baby you have no idea how kinky I can be. You'll have to wait in line because my cyber box is so stuffed right now; hell baby, I'm so kinky I had to create a lottery system and you're number hasn't come up yet.

I love nature walks, camping and walking along the beach holding hands and stroking my pet poodle as she peeks out from my purse. Oh wait that's Paris and a bald pooch that yaps a lot. Sorry was distracted by the fantasy of myself.

I'm not sarcastic in the least, please feel free to check out this thread if you doubt me.

~ RHF

Really?

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Really?

It was the line about having the pet poodle right? Damn it. I forgot I had shared online that I have a half Australian Shepherd/Border Collie mix. That's where I lost you wasn't it?

 

[rbijon]

It was the line about having the pet poodle right? Damn it. I forgot I had shared online that I have a half Australian Shepherd/Border Collie mix. That's where I lost you wasn't it?

You had me deep in with the super long Red hair and the deadly green eyes. The poodle could have been a snake after that.

I love Reptilian Red Heads with green eyes

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

You had me deep in with the super long Red hair and the deadly green eyes. The poodle could have been a snake after that.

I love Reptilian Red Heads with green eyes

LMAO - yeah, dead-red that's me.

He actually responded back telling me that because of my response I am now at the head of the line in his list. I'm not responding back. He's got a link to the thread if he truly wants to find me and I'm sure if he doesn't poke into the thread, he'll PM me back in a different name, or forget he sent me one and I'll get a repeat PM from him again sometime.

PMs from strangers are no longer adventurous for me, no one is creative and than if they are you only find out they were creative enough to send it to 20 other women on Lit. as well.

 

[rbijon]

LMAO - yeah, dead-red that's me.

He actually responded back telling me that because of my response I am now at the head of the line in his list. I'm not responding back. He's got a link to the thread if he truly wants to find me and I'm sure if he doesn't poke into the thread, he'll PM me back in a different name, or forget he sent me one and I'll get a repeat PM from him again sometime.

PMs from strangers are no longer adventurous for me, no one is creative and than if they are you only find out they were creative enough to send it to 20 other women on Lit. as well.

My Dear you have to problem of being too delicious!.........and to smart

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Not smart enough - I misspelled "your" *sigh* it isn't "you're" ! Now he'll probably back out of cyber-fucking me because I can't spell. Oh well, back to writing and random posting I go. Enjoy your evening.

 

[Aquagal]

Let's give him points for cheesy creativity.......lol

"Your moon pulls me as if it has control too."

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Let's give him points for cheesy creativity.......lol

"Your moon pulls me as if it has control too."

Oh my that is very cheesy. lol

 

[fathom7]

Take a petal from a rose. Touch the inside of it as gently as you can with your fingertip.

That is what exists in my imagination as I think of you and how you feel.

 

[trojank]

Let's give him points for cheesy creativity.......lol

"Your moon pulls me as if it has control too."

Im very cheesey lol ...........

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Take a petal from a rose. Touch the inside of it as gently as you can with your fingertip.

That is what exists in my imagination as I think of you and how you feel.

See.. because I know you, that is sexy.

If I got that from some random guy it would come across as a come online from another random stranger. From you it would come across as a soft sweet promise to an erotic encounter.

That's why men who think of beautiful words such as those need to post on Lit. and interact with the folks here, otherwise how can their words ever be taken seriously - even if they may not be.

 

[fathom7]

See.. because I know you, that is sexy.

If I got that from some random guy it would come across as a come online from another random stranger. From you it would come across as a soft sweet promise to an erotic encounter.

That's why men who think of beautiful words such as those need to post on Lit. and interact with the folks here, otherwise how can their words ever be taken seriously - even if they may not be.

Ahem.
thank you.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Ahem.
thank you.

You're very welcome.

 

[TexasWife25]

" ... 72 hours of giving you multiple orgasms, one after another, each one better than the last"

Just my fav part of the "best" PM i think
ive had all week

 

[Aurantica]

Holy crap, I just realized... I dont get many PMs from random people anymore..... Weird.

 

[Artina Heartflash]

Just got my second one from this guy:

fun?
Hey there! How are you today? I'm xxxx, a charming, funny, good looking and fit 28.m from Atlanta-I have brown hair, blue eyes, 6'0 and fit. I thought I would say hello, and see what you were up to today?

My friends know me as the smart and driven one of the group, always at work or up to something-- but they have no idea how far my sexual side goes- nor do they have any idea how horny or kinky I am. I'd love to chat and have some fun.

I love to run, be outside, watch sports, read, go out with friends, and I have a bit of a sarcastic streak. I hope we can chat soon.

I hope to hear from you soon.

xxxxxx

Yahoo: xxxxxxxxx

I didn't respond last time so I'm contemplating this as a response and decided to send it. *sigh*

Hi xxxx,

My name is not RedHairedandFriendly, it's actually --- oh wait, I probably should remain all mysterious for you. I am funny, charming, good-looking and moderately fit (let's be honest here - who really cares if we're fit or not, in the land of cyberville) -- In fact let's go all out...

I'm 23 years old, red hair down to my ass, the curls skate across my bottom, and make the perfect silky rope for you to grab on to as you try to be that kinky man you hide from your friends. I'm five foot nine (why be too short, or too tall - right). I've got the darkest green eyes you've ever seen, men have died just for the right to look into my sexy orbs of sin.

I'm glad you said hello, because I have never before received a PM as witty and fun loving as the one you sent me. Well, I have - just once, it was from you but I ignored it. Obviously I was wrong to, because you have portrayed yourself as my dream man. I'm sure you know exactly what I'm looking for. In cyberville you can be anything I want - right?

I love to chat and have fun too, and kinky - baby you have no idea how kinky I can be. You'll have to wait in line because my cyber box is so stuffed right now; hell baby, I'm so kinky I had to create a lottery system and you're number hasn't come up yet.

I love nature walks, camping and walking along the beach holding hands and stroking my pet poodle as she peeks out from my purse. Oh wait that's Paris and a bald pooch that yaps a lot. Sorry was distracted by the fantasy of myself.

I'm not sarcastic in the least, please feel free to check out this thread if you doubt me.

~ RHF

ROTFL!!!! OH thank you for sharing that! Maybe you can add it to your personal profile.

I do have dark red hair and green eyes but if any have died for the right to look in them, it's because I was having a Medusa moment. (One gaze can turn a man to stone...but the boulder balls drop off...! lol.)

 

[Rayne_Clowd]

Just got my second one from this guy:

fun?
Hey there! How are you today? I'm xxxx, a charming, funny, good looking and fit 28.m from Atlanta-I have brown hair, blue eyes, 6'0 and fit. I thought I would say hello, and see what you were up to today?

My friends know me as the smart and driven one of the group, always at work or up to something-- but they have no idea how far my sexual side goes- nor do they have any idea how horny or kinky I am. I'd love to chat and have some fun.

I love to run, be outside, watch sports, read, go out with friends, and I have a bit of a sarcastic streak. I hope we can chat soon.

I hope to hear from you soon.

xxxxxx

Yahoo: xxxxxxxxx

I didn't respond last time so I'm contemplating this as a response and decided to send it. *sigh*

Hi xxxx,

My name is not RedHairedandFriendly, it's actually --- oh wait, I probably should remain all mysterious for you. I am funny, charming, good-looking and moderately fit (let's be honest here - who really cares if we're fit or not, in the land of cyberville) -- In fact let's go all out...

I'm 23 years old, red hair down to my ass, the curls skate across my bottom, and make the perfect silky rope for you to grab on to as you try to be that kinky man you hide from your friends. I'm five foot nine (why be too short, or too tall - right). I've got the darkest green eyes you've ever seen, men have died just for the right to look into my sexy orbs of sin.

I'm glad you said hello, because I have never before received a PM as witty and fun loving as the one you sent me. Well, I have - just once, it was from you but I ignored it. Obviously I was wrong to, because you have portrayed yourself as my dream man. I'm sure you know exactly what I'm looking for. In cyberville you can be anything I want - right?

I love to chat and have fun too, and kinky - baby you have no idea how kinky I can be. You'll have to wait in line because my cyber box is so stuffed right now; hell baby, I'm so kinky I had to create a lottery system and you're number hasn't come up yet.

I love nature walks, camping and walking along the beach holding hands and stroking my pet poodle as she peeks out from my purse. Oh wait that's Paris and a bald pooch that yaps a lot. Sorry was distracted by the fantasy of myself.

I'm not sarcastic in the least, please feel free to check out this thread if you doubt me.

~ RHF

First I want to spank your ass, cause you just made me do the most UN-lady like thing of snorting milk out my nose.. LOL

Second I want to give you the biggest hi5, cause that is the funniest post I have seen so far.

Had me in stitches good job RHF

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

" ... 72 hours of giving you multiple orgasms, one after another, each one better than the last"

Just my fav part of the "best" PM i think
ive had all week

*chuckles* Really - do men honestly think we women would want 72 hours of multiple orgasms, or that we even believe they could do it?

Holy crap, I just realized... I dont get many PMs from random people anymore..... Weird.

It's nice isn't it? I did get a few yesterday, but they weren't nearly exciting enough to post here. I was "judgmental" one said because I didn't want to mess around with a 19 year old (I'm 38.)

ROTFL!!!! OH thank you for sharing that! Maybe you can add it to your personal profile.

I do have dark red hair and green eyes but if any have died for the right to look in them, it's because I was having a Medusa moment. (One gaze can turn a man to stone...but the boulder balls drop off...! lol.)

Glad you liked. I was quite happy with it, and surprised when he responded back, but touched that I was moved to the head of the line - in front of all the ladies I'm sure were eagerly waiting his attention.

First I want to spank your ass, cause you just made me do the most UN-lady like thing of snorting milk out my nose.. LOL

Second I want to give you the biggest hi5, cause that is the funniest post I have seen so far.

Had me in stitches good job RHF

Need a napkin.

 

[1sickbastard]

Hello --

simple yes, boring somewhat, straightforward - hmm... I don't know.

For me, hello gets a hello back, and nothing more.

Then usually I get back a "how are you?" or "how r u?"

My answer: Fine

Next PM "What r u doin?"

My answer: Posting

Next PM: "What do u like?"

--- By this point I'm annoyed and tired. I definitely feel I'm either about to be hit on, or I'm only being PMed for one thing and one thing only. I'm just some random woman on the internet that was only worth a "hello" - there is nothing in that PM to say that the PMer knew anything about me, except my name.

Gack! I don't blame you!
Thing for me is; I don't pm anyone until we've interacted somewhat, and I'm actually curious to to the person. I which case I'll have something to say that I hope will at least get a smile and a thanks for sending it. If not, I wouldn't pm to begin with.

But that's just me

 

[poisonplum]

RHF that was uber funny and just made me snort laugh. I haven't gotten any as interesting as that one yet. I guess I'm just not that inspiring. I'll keep you posted.

Oh as an aside, the brownies are AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Gack! I don't blame you!
Thing for me is; I don't pm anyone until we've interacted somewhat, and I'm actually curious to to the person. I which case I'll have something to say that I hope will at least get a smile and a thanks for sending it. If not, I wouldn't pm to begin with.

But that's just me

Good policy in place.

RHF that was uber funny and just made me snort laugh. I haven't gotten any as interesting as that one yet. I guess I'm just not that inspiring. I'll keep you posted.

Oh as an aside, the brownies are AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!

Please do, and I'm really glad you liked the brownies.

 

[TexasWife25]

todays fav i think

"If you let me jingle your bell I will tie a bow round something under my kilt and you can play with it........and I don't mean the bow!!!!!! "

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

This thread provides me the best incentive to NEVER send a PM without being asked to first.....