Your best or your worst PM or IM opening lines... and if you want your reactions ...

So I see. Sorry I'm still on the third chapter of the lit handbook. I'll make sure to say cock instead of junk, package or jewels from now on. Although now I think the poultry pictures will be coming.



it's "wang" for me...don't fuck up!!
 
So I see. Sorry I'm still on the third chapter of the lit handbook. I'll make sure to say cock instead of junk, package or jewels from now on. Although now I think the poultry pictures will be coming.

I'm surprised you got so many pictures showing you actual packages. I thought men around here would whip it out for anyone that wanted to see. Or for anyone that didn't want to see but just happened to be online. A quick perusal of Personals and the ads for men offering to show off on cam made me think so.
 
it's "wang" for me...don't fuck up!!

Lemme see your wang Slinger! Now! ;)

I'm surprised you got so many pictures showing you actual packages. I thought men around here would whip it out for anyone that wanted to see. Or for anyone that didn't want to see but just happened to be online. A quick perusal of Personals and the ads for men offering to show off on cam made me think so.

I seriously must be doing something wrong cause I've only gotten ONE unsolicited cock pic. You men are too bashful.
 
Dang that sounds like a fair trade. I am not afraid to share the love of my cock , as some on lit know , especially if it will be well received. I should try the pm "I will show you mine if you show me yours"
 
hello
Hi. Married 40/ND here. Hubby at work? Are you submissive?


---

I'm responding back with a link to this thread- but I have a question for men and women -

Why do you tell people where you are from, if you are just PMing them for chat or phone play? I mean - one person PMed me that they were in the USA, who gives a flip, I mean, if we're going to chat via PMs or messenger programs, or maybe even phone play, do you really think any one in virtual land gives a flip to where you're from?

I mean really, it isn't like you're looking to hook-up with the person in real life, not with that pick-up line.
 
I've found that when I send an out-of-the-blue picture of my cock, I have to always remember to send the pic that was taken with the fisheye lens...to make me look less pathetic.....

Just a PSA for average (at best) guys out there....while women claim to not want spontaneous cock shots sent, they REALLY do not want spontaneous lame ass cock shots...take it from someone with a LOT of experience...:D
 
Just yesterday I got one that said: Be mine id pamper you

I wrote back, I'm not looking for someone to pamper me, I'm looking for a Sugar Daddy. You up for that?

He said, "lol of course"

I said, "I need a financial statement and a health certificate from your doc letting me know if you are healthy or going to kick the bucket soon."

No response. Figures. :rolleyes:
 
Just yesterday I got one that said: Be mine id pamper you

I wrote back, I'm not looking for someone to pamper me, I'm looking for a Sugar Daddy. You up for that?

He said, "lol of course"

I said, "I need a financial statement and a health certificate from your doc letting me know if you are healthy or going to kick the bucket soon."

No response. Figures. :rolleyes:

In my defense, my doctor is on a long weekend golfing and my financial advisor is pulling together all of the paperwork from my offshore accounts as we speak!
:D
 
There are times I won't reply to a PM and that's regardless of whether it's a truly decent PM or crass PM. I'm pretty clear in my profile about the PMs I will/won't reply to.

Having said that...this PM was just simple yet so touching...

___________________________________________________

Just wanted you to know the entire reason I finally signed up was it was the only way I could see your photos. You are... gorgeous!

___________________________________________________

If that wasn't flattering I'm not sure what would be...I actually got to meet that Litster earlier this year, he was very nice :)
 
There are times I won't reply to a PM and that's regardless of whether it's a truly decent PM or crass PM. I'm pretty clear in my profile about the PMs I will/won't reply to.

Having said that...this PM was just simple yet so touching...

___________________________________________________

Just wanted you to know the entire reason I finally signed up was it was the only way I could see your photos. You are... gorgeous!

___________________________________________________

If that wasn't flattering I'm not sure what would be...I actually got to meet that Litster earlier this year, he was very nice :)


That is nice. :) And it was cool you got to meet him too. I've met many Litsters and the experiences were all positive.
 
You should never PM me unless you know I'm in a good mood.

-just prefer direct if care to chat, share, explore. see if a connect. and i promise to know the difference between too and to, which surely has to be a turn-on, right? plus your incredible number of posts compared to my zero are a perfect juxtaposition, don't you think?-


You may know the difference between "to" and "too" - however you don't seem to know how to capitalize things. Which is more of a turn on than knowing the difference between "to" and "too" because even I sometimes mess that up. So sorry, that didn't work out for you.

I do have a number of posts, and that's because I've been here off and on for six years. I've also posted on the threads, allowing people - many people - to get to know me (whether sexually or not) without taking up my time in a PM where most all of their questions could have been answered publicly if they had taken the time to get to know me. So your "0" post count, again is a big turn off.

See, had you posted in the threads, and if you'd had your signature option on you may have saved yourself a lot of trouble. There is a link in my signature that directs people on proper PM etiquette and again you've struck out.

So, since this is the age of 3 strikes you're out -- I'm pretty sure we aren't going to fit together. I do hope you have a wonderful day, find what you're looking for and rethink how you approach women on the internet. Some of us are very "catty" and you never know what mood we'll be in when you PM us.

~ Red

***

No, this guy isn't rude, and maybe I was harsh and this probably wouldn't have bothered me nearly as much if:

1. I was in the mood to PM strangers this afternoon.
2. He hadn't bragged about his grammar skills.
3. He hadn't thought a zero PM count was a great way to hook up with me.
 
hi,

27 y/o male here with a hard 7 inches...wear a cock ring..heavy cummer..bisexual tendencies..love to be made to suck cock while you direct/masturbate

i have a huge big tit fetish and enjoy am older sexually dominant woman..

*name ommitted to protect the dumbass



I don't even have words to express my disgust in dumbass.
 
hi,

27 y/o male here with a hard 7 inches...wear a cock ring..heavy cummer..bisexual tendencies..love to be made to suck cock while you direct/masturbate

i have a huge big tit fetish and enjoy am older sexually dominant woman..

*name ommitted to protect the dumbass



I don't even have words to express my disgust in dumbass.

lmao I was just going to post this one too!! Must be a mass PM arent we lucky NOT lol
 
lmao I was just going to post this one too!! Must be a mass PM arent we lucky NOT lol

I sent him a response: Have fun getting to know me better. And of course a link to this thread. :rolleyes:

Defintely a mass PM. His 7 inch cock is only 7 inches because of the ring and it's probably more like 2.5 and that extra .5 is foreskin. :rolleyes:
 
I sent him a response: Have fun getting to know me better. And of course a link to this thread. :rolleyes:

Defintely a mass PM. His 7 inch cock is only 7 inches because of the ring and it's probably more like 2.5 and that extra .5 is foreskin. :rolleyes:

lol damn wish I had thought of sharing the link! Sad part is a guy like that wont get it even then
 
I sent him a response: Have fun getting to know me better. And of course a link to this thread. :rolleyes:

Defintely a mass PM. His 7 inch cock is only 7 inches because of the ring and it's probably more like 2.5 and that extra .5 is foreskin. :rolleyes:


He started measuring from his asshole. :eek:
 
I love it when guys pm me thinking I'm a woman.........do I act like one or something?
 
PM to Red:
Come trip the light fantastic with me if you want to have fun.
 
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