World's Funniest Joke?

[PacificBlue]

...according to some research and scientists it is....



“A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
“The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: ‘My friend is dead! What can I do?’
“The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: ’Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.’
“There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: ‘OK, now what?”

 

[lobito]

I passed this story up this morning when reading the news on Yahoo. Now I'm wishing I wouldn't have wasted my time here too. It's a pretty lame joke, as jokes go.

 

[Cibo]

...according to some research and scientists it is....



“A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
“The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: ‘My friend is dead! What can I do?’
“The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: ’Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.’
“There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: ‘OK, now what?”

ROFL....

 

[Ice Cold]

Now come on Jersey hunters know to shoot first before you make a phone call.

 

[Star of Penumbra]

That joke has been around for at least the last decade. I thought it was pretty stupid when I first heard, and I still do.

 

[Guest]

lmao

 

[Shaq]

eh...those scientists should be arrested for squandering millions of dollars in lab and research grants because that joke was a 3...maybe a 4..but the pull my finger ones are funnier...

 

[Lady X]

 

[Spinaroonie]

didn't the britsfind that thefunniest joke was the Sherlock Holms one?

 

[Guest]

blonde, redneck, jew, nigger, paki, desi, jap, chink, muslim, catholic, paddy, jock, toff, frog, beach towel, kike, etc.

the brits love any jokes which are about bodily functions.

 

[Starblayde]

"My mate's girlfriend comes up to me and says that he wants her to have bigger breasts. Do I know anything that could help her out, she asks.

"Yes, I say, take some toilet paper and rub it between your breasts once a day and you'll find your breasts will get bigger.

"Really? she asks, Will that work?

"Of course, I say, look what its done for your arse."

 

[Guest]

that was five points funny.

 

[Guest]

...according to some research and scientists it is....



“A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
“The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: ‘My friend is dead! What can I do?’
“The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: ’Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.’
“There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: ‘OK, now what?”

lmao !!

 

[Guest]

didn't the britsfind that thefunniest joke was the Sherlock Holms one?

______

According to a poll conducted by the British Association for the Advancement of Science, the following is the world's funniest joke:


Famed fictional detective Sherlock Holmes and his gruff assistant Doctor Watson pitch their tent while on a camping expedition, but in the middle of the night Holmes nudges Watson awake and questions him.

HOLMES: Watson, look up at the stars and tell me what you deduce.

WATSON: I see millions of stars, and if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it is quite likely there are some planets like earth, and if there are a few planets like earth out there there might also be life.

HOLMES: Watson, you idiot! Somebody stole our tent.






British science ... I think you have to be there.

 

[Guest]

good one.

 

[Guest]

I think you have to be there.

better one.
i think i got it.

 

[Sandia]

A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them goes into the bush to take a piss and a snake jumps out and bites him on his dick.

The other guy, frantic, gets on his cell phone and calls 911. "What sould I do?" he asks.

He listens while the operator carefully tells him how to suck the poison out of the wound.

"Well," his friend asks, "What'd they say?"

"They said," he says, looking at his friend and hanging up the phone, "That you're about to die."

 

[Guest]

too many re-cycling, boss.

 

[Thrillhouse]

The article I read about the "funniest joke" mentioned one that NO ONE found funny. I must be the only one who laughed the first time I heard it:

What's brown and sticky?



























A stick.