Who is BlackShanglan and why is he here?

[BlackShanglan]

Somewhere, Machiavelli is weeping with envy.

It's phrases like this one that tempt me to the wicked excesses of a sig file.

 

[Paendragon]

(sotto voce)

Ssshh. It's part of my cunning plan.

You see, about three years ago, I realized what a fascinating, erudite, and insightful person Ishmael is. Of course, I was so intimidated by his intellect that I didn't have the courage to approach him openly, so I created this alt instead. I spent two and three quarters years carefully constructing its identity, writing stories, posting bulletin board messages, and feigning social interaction all while shyly concealing my admiration from Ishmael. I'm bashful that way. Then finally, a few months ago, I brought my masterpiece to perfection and pretended to notice for the first time that such a person as Ishmael existed.

Ingenious.

Well, I apologize for assuming the worst. Welcome to the GB.

 

[~Avalon~]

(sotto voce)

Ssshh. It's part of my cunning plan.

You see, about three years ago, I realized what a fascinating, erudite, and insightful person Ishmael is. Of course, I was so intimidated by his intellect that I didn't have the courage to approach him openly, so I created this alt instead. I spent two and three quarters years carefully constructing its identity, writing stories, posting bulletin board messages, and feigning social interaction all while shyly concealing my admiration from Ishmael. I'm bashful that way. Then finally, a few months ago, I brought my masterpiece to perfection and pretended to notice for the first time that such a person as Ishmael existed.

you are a wicked horsey

 

[tortoise]

Durian?

No, thank you, I just ate.

I think I'd prefer a durian to a mealy apple, all things considered. The former can be tolerated as long as one holds one's nose.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Ingenious.

Well, I apologize for assuming the worst. Welcome to the GB.

Thank you, that's very kind of you. I enjoy the color and spirit of the place. Such warm hospitality, too. It's awfully sweet of Ishmael to start a thread to introduce me to everyone.

 

[Recidiva]

No, thank you, I just ate.

I think I'd prefer a durian to a mealy apple, all things considered. The former can be tolerated as long as one holds one's nose.

I'm not sure about that. But I've seen Andrew Zimmern try to eat one and spit it out. And that dude ate pickled whale blubber.

Though it is said it's texture is like custard. Granted, custard that tastes like rotten onions.

 

[Recidiva]

Thank you, that's very kind of you. I enjoy the color and spirit of the place. Such warm hospitality, too. It's awfully sweet of Ishmael to start a thread to introduce me to everyone.

And I got to see tortoise speak to BlackShanglan.

Life has its truly sublime moments amidst the ridiculous.

 

[tortoise]

"Struggle not, Black Shanglan," said Ishmael, "I have tamed thy better."

 

[Darktan]

And I got to see tortoise speak to BlackShanglan.

Life has its truly sublime moments amidst the ridiculous.

What did I miss?

Did they make out?

 

[sophieloves]

things are getting surreal here... first a talking horse, then a talking tortoise, Cade (the talking mutt that he is), and a Paendragon. i'll just talk out my arse because it feels apt, right now, in such diverse company.

omg curiouser and curiouser - a little orange monkey now too!

 

[Recidiva]

What did I miss?

Did they make out?

No, let's go start a thread saying they did, though.

It's a no-fail strategy to create truth.

 

[Saint Peter]

Tort is a ginny alt. I am calling the FBI.

 

[sophieloves]

Reci - you may be the oracle down there, in your well, but a tortoise and a horse? c'mon, that's so not right.

 

[Darktan]

No, let's go start a thread saying they did, though.

It's a no-fail strategy to create truth.

Awesome.

Can it have pictures?

 

[Recidiva]

Tort is a ginny alt. I am calling the FBI.

"I need to report HOTNESSSSSSS..."

 

[Recidiva]

Reci - you may be the oracle down there, in your well, but a tortoise and a horse? c'mon, that's so not right.

You're so narrow minded. Honestly!

 

[Recidiva]

Awesome.

Can it have pictures?

Yes, please.

Lurid is convincing.

 

[tortoise]

You all are quite mad.

This should in no wise be construed as a complaint.

 

[sophieloves]

You're so narrow minded. Honestly!

oh, it's not about inter-species re-lay-shun-ships, just more to do with sizes and the mechanics involved... my narrow mind needs elasticating

 

[Recidiva]

You all are quite mad.

This should in no wise be construed as a complaint.

I know I am.

It helps.

(I miss you way too much when you're not here. This should be construed as a complaint.)

 

[phrodeau]

I wonder how often Ishmael logs on and then wonders how much he'd had to drink the night before.

 

[tortoise]

I know I am.

It helps.

(I miss you way too much when you're not here. This should be construed as a complaint.)

*smiling*

I've been deliciously... occupied, of late. But it's fun to come back and engage in this brand of madness from time to time. The horse definitely adds to the fun.

 

[Recidiva]

*smiling*

I've been deliciously... occupied, of late. But it's fun to come back and engage in this brand of madness from time to time. The horse definitely adds to the fun.

I'm glad to hear about the delicious, even if it does take you away.

If I must be denied your presence, at least it's for a delicious cause.

 

[BlackShanglan]

"Struggle not, Black Shanglan," said Ishmael, "I have tamed thy better."

I wondered when someone would get 'round to Standish O'Grady! Clearly you are a tortoise of mettle. That particular line has for some reason always spoken to me ... I, ah, can't imagine why.

I've had a weak spot for O'Grady ever since I read The Coming of Cuculain in a wonderful old edition whose plates depicted the "water dog" (a typical way of saying "otter" in Irish legend) as a giant aquatic terrier. Marvellous.

 

[BlackShanglan]

No, let's go start a thread saying they did, though.

It's a no-fail strategy to create truth.

God bless you and the star you were born under. What would I have to pay you to sway the truth of this tryst in certain particularly delicious directions?