What's She (or He) Saying? Redeux

[thefishfryer]

https://i.pinimg.com/550x/ef/27/74/ef277465579c374977dec2a977cfd383.jpg

It's really strange how that plain looking waitress seems to look more attractive after each glass of wine. I'm on the second bottle now and about to make the same mistake again.

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/e1b521a2fd6cae12fbe61997f1484ce0/c3358d9c55336a2f-5c/s1280x1920/ea8c32c8ba914774e8eeba9131ca4b92f5086ff6.jpg

"Oh my god you were right! This is the most beautiful place in the world I have ever been!
Thank you sooooo much for bringing me here. I know we just did it in the hotel this morning,
but can we have sex down there on that beach? Please, please, please! Take another Viagra.
So what if we get caught? Who cares? It'll just make this place even more unforgettable!"

 

[LizVegas79]

https://www.hawtcelebs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/09/kara-del-toro-and-ella-cervetto-for-oh-polly-satin-capsule-campaign-september-2024-9.jpg

(blonde): "Oh my god. Does that sound like a sybbie to you? I think this perv has a sybbie!
Yaaay!!! If it is, we totally have to fuck him so he'll let us play with it. Okay?"
(brunette): "Yeah, that totally sounds like a sybbie. Sure, we can fuck him if you want.
But do you see that painting over there? I think it's a real Picasso. We should leave a door
open or something so that we can come back later and totally fucking steal it. "

 

[EricaAnna]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/4387eb15090e79592791a1fcb6e036f9/f8af76f345da558c-ae/s1280x1920/b0f2bbc422bec9ac4bc43fa0f3834e5e32fbe849.jpg

"So, with my husband gone for the weekend, I wonder if that cute, curvy girl at his work that he talks about all the time has ever had experience with a sybbie?"

 

[zoso682001]

What are your plans for dinner?
View attachment 2401725

I think I'll be eating out !

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/586c986bba877cfc2d11e1ed5997533b/324d841e62f3e234-bf/s1280x1920/82b26fb5974c3e6e17f5e474e596832c480c9da8.jpg

"Really? You've never fucked on the ocean before? It's so awesome. The waves do half the work."

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/586c986bba877cfc2d11e1ed5997533b/324d841e62f3e234-bf/s1280x1920/82b26fb5974c3e6e17f5e474e596832c480c9da8.jpg

"It's too bad you're married. I've always thought you were kinda cute."

 

[EricaAnna]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/2d1b8b684514c99c3873c1a5f562832b/4fed20f36c35722b-7a/s1280x1920/f4e4210b930eceb24516b13e99320f9015f0c0e8.jpg

"Well, yes, my girlfriend is gone for the week....see we have a deal, when either of us are on vacation we can sleep with anyone we want while we're apart...but no strings attached."

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/586c986bba877cfc2d11e1ed5997533b/324d841e62f3e234-bf/s1280x1920/82b26fb5974c3e6e17f5e474e596832c480c9da8.jpg

"It looks like you have a flashlight in your pocket. But I don't know why you would have a
flashlight in your pocket out here on the ocean in the middle of the day. Oh? It's not a
flashlight? Then what pray tell could it be? Do you want to show me? You know, my husband
is going to be riding his stupid jet ski for at least an hour so we don't have anything else to
do but play hide the flashlight."

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/586c986bba877cfc2d11e1ed5997533b/324d841e62f3e234-bf/s1280x1920/82b26fb5974c3e6e17f5e474e596832c480c9da8.jpg

"You do realize our husbands are going to be riding their stupid jet skis for at least an hour, right?
I could show you the cabin again if you like. We could mix ourselves a drink and take a little nap
together and wait for them to come back if you want."

 

[investor2020]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/0ee326d263723d60fe95cfdbb980473c/tumblr_pm1maooJfn1sh3qsyo1_500.pnj
Her: "Well you certainly know the right key to play with me."

 

[EricaAnna]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/0ee326d263723d60fe95cfdbb980473c/tumblr_pm1maooJfn1sh3qsyo1_500.pnj

Her: "You better hurry before my husband comes back...unless you want him to catch you with his wife"

 

[LizVegas79]

Guys, here's an excellent example of a bad joke ending your sex life:



https://i.pinimg.com/736x/90/a8/f3/90a8f33b180c2df245b97a28c9d2c529.jpg

Take away lesson - please stop making bad jokes in bed!!!

I have to admit this one was pretty funny though - I may have to use it some day
(for the record, girls can get away with making bad jokes in bed because you guys are thrilled we are even there lol)

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/0ee326d263723d60fe95cfdbb980473c/tumblr_pm1maooJfn1sh3qsyo1_500.pnj

"Mmmm, a G-chord for my G-spot. My, my, you ARE talented!"

 

[JustDave478]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/586c986bba877cfc2d11e1ed5997533b/324d841e62f3e234-bf/s1280x1920/82b26fb5974c3e6e17f5e474e596832c480c9da8.jpg

"Really? You've never fucked on the ocean before? It's so awesome. The waves do half the work."

Insane.

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/0554439b1ea639137e6f8e7fd94c734f/7f5a6ac571547d6d-d8/s640x960/aa8146650dd4f779b8d6063cefddc1189f95c74a.jpg

(brunette): "Oh my god, I can't even remember my husband's name right now!"

 

[EricaAnna]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/0554439b1ea639137e6f8e7fd94c734f/7f5a6ac571547d6d-d8/s640x960/aa8146650dd4f779b8d6063cefddc1189f95c74a.jpg

(brunette): "Oh my god, I can't even remember my husband's name right now!"

(Blonde): "Does that mean you can stay the whole weekend?"

 

[mickyp123]

"You do realize our husbands are going to be riding their stupid jet skis for at least an hour, right?
I could show you the cabin again if you like. We could mix ourselves a drink and take a little nap
together and wait for them to come back if you want."

https://64.media.tumblr.com/0ee326d263723d60fe95cfdbb980473c/tumblr_pm1maooJfn1sh3qsyo1_500.pnj
Well done, first music lesson and you managed to find middle C

 

[mickyp123]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/586c986bba877cfc2d11e1ed5997533b/324d841e62f3e234-bf/s1280x1920/82b26fb5974c3e6e17f5e474e596832c480c9da8.jpg

Wow, I can tell you haven’t seen one before, it’s called a dick magnet

 

[EricaAnna]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/17158d3963fc8a56480ad06aae8856da/d5952435ba70d670-9b/s1280x1920/818965a4dece18dc1d7d1c56a78af821b7ef30d4.jpg

"So....what other qualifications do you have for being my assistant? Be specific, it's just between us."

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/17158d3963fc8a56480ad06aae8856da/d5952435ba70d670-9b/s1280x1920/818965a4dece18dc1d7d1c56a78af821b7ef30d4.jpg

"So....what other qualifications do you have for being my assistant? Be specific, it's just between us."

"I'm really good at keeping secrets and being discreet if we become friends. Or even more than just friends."

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/73127a870995333284c5577b9bd27db4/125b3c6686c42cb7-d4/s500x750/a8f2bb1e2b0418102c339fd2cd36cb8047664ae2.jpg

"Really? Your husband won't be home until then? Well, you do have a
really nice house Lizzie and that gives us the whole afternoon doesn't it?"

 

[LizVegas79]

"So what? We're both married. And we both have needs that aren't being met, right? It's either going to be you or some other guy here tonight so the choice is yours."

 

[LizVegas79]

https://ist8-2.filesor.com/pimpandhost.com/3/2/8/9/328981/i/Z/x/M/iZxMr/ezgif-2-e5e6d0aee0.gif

"I told you you should come hiking with me today, baby. Now I'm going to let this
boy I just met and his two friends go hiking with me and make you watch. Ready?"



(guys: when we say we want to get outside and get some exercise you really should
always, ALWAYS come with us because exercise doesn't always mean hiking or jogging
or anything that boring!)

 

[LizVegas79]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/3a1eabca88afdbaccbdc69277261d635/3b5a402323a0a3b9-31/s2048x3072/388b78434f4509eb4b48d9074e52dc1d44e7fc65.jpg

"Why are you so nervous? Come sit down and talk to me. I promise I won't bite.
Unless of course you want me to. But even then, I won't bite too hard. I promise."