*True Confessions*
- Thread starter Jewelz
- Start date
- Status
naughtygirl
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Dec 26, 2000
- Posts
- 6,884
You guys have become dear dear friends to me...Thanks for being so good to me.
*tears streaming doen my face, silently crying at the joy I am feeling right now*
*tears streaming doen my face, silently crying at the joy I am feeling right now*
naughtygirl
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Dec 26, 2000
- Posts
- 6,884
*hugs Naded sweetly*
naded
Inked and Scarred
- Joined
- May 14, 2002
- Posts
- 6,500
* is not in a hug or holding mood
* does not want to talk about it
* is currently drinking alot of vodka
* plans NOT to remember today
* has put a sign on his door at home that literally says "GO THE FUCK AWAY"
* is not in his friendly place
* dares the asshole upstairs to get loud
* is done venting
* does not want to talk about it
* is currently drinking alot of vodka
* plans NOT to remember today
* has put a sign on his door at home that literally says "GO THE FUCK AWAY"
* is not in his friendly place
* dares the asshole upstairs to get loud
* is done venting
Batch
Airship Captain
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2002
- Posts
- 52,619
* i confess that after this shit high day...
*and with my un natural ....feeling sometimes.....
*id on't understand myself
*or why i am so immature about this stupid thing....
*stupid me
stupid
stupid
stupid
i am stupid......
and I need to leave ehre..what the fuck was I thinking?????????????????????????????????
like some high school..thing...............
get over it
get over it
get over it
like an idiot.like an idiot
* and I want to punch someone
* ifeel violent
i feel angry.....
and hurt.like a little puppy
little pathetic puppy
not going to talk about it any more
*and with my un natural ....feeling sometimes.....
*id on't understand myself
*or why i am so immature about this stupid thing....
*stupid me
stupid
stupid
stupid
i am stupid......
and I need to leave ehre..what the fuck was I thinking?????????????????????????????????
like some high school..thing...............
get over it
get over it
get over it
like an idiot.like an idiot
* and I want to punch someone
* ifeel violent
i feel angry.....
and hurt.like a little puppy
little pathetic puppy
not going to talk about it any more
Marilyth
Heartland Inspiration
- Joined
- Dec 10, 2001
- Posts
- 1,214
* Is frustrated that lit wasn't working for her this afternoon.
*Happy that room is clean.
*Pissed that glasses are broken.
*Glad that tomorrow is SUNDAY!!
* Friend Rob said that a "Kari" came across his desk at work, he does background checks for a bank. Maybe one is me
* Feels blind in one eye cuz contacts don't like cigarrette smoke, and I don't even smoke.
* Hates that all her friends smoke and she quit years ago.
* Didn't drink any alcohol at all tonite, was a good girl
* Sorry that Naded is in a foul mood. Not gonna hug, just let you be in that "angry" place. Hell if women can do it, men can too by god!!
Um, yeah... ok that's it from me...
*Happy that room is clean.
*Pissed that glasses are broken.
*Glad that tomorrow is SUNDAY!!
* Friend Rob said that a "Kari" came across his desk at work, he does background checks for a bank. Maybe one is me
* Feels blind in one eye cuz contacts don't like cigarrette smoke, and I don't even smoke.
* Hates that all her friends smoke and she quit years ago.
* Didn't drink any alcohol at all tonite, was a good girl
* Sorry that Naded is in a foul mood. Not gonna hug, just let you be in that "angry" place. Hell if women can do it, men can too by god!!
Um, yeah... ok that's it from me...
To Starfyre...
First of all, I usually read all of the posts. And each of you seem to have several points in common about your fears and experiences. I, too, share many of them.
Starfyre, I especially enjoyed your most recent confession. There were so many points in it that touched a place inside me. I feel most fortunate at times, in that I had a rather average middle-class childhood. But the time and generation in which I was raised made a big difference in my personality and life experiences.
It was my misfortune to have a mother that was raised by very strick and overbearing parents. She also developed severe hormonal deficiencies during my early childhood, ages 8 and upwards. This affected her mood and mental state. And by the time I was 11, she had so demoralized me that my only thought was how I was going to kill her when I was old enough.
You would think that being raised in a Christian family, I would never consider doing such. But her mental and emotional abuse so affected me, that I became like a caged and tortured animal.
I don't think I have even now completely outgrown that part of my life. And her treatment of me, along with things my dad said early in my development, has weakened my self-esteem for most of my adult life.
Being a member here at Lit. has helped me immensely. I have found and made good friends with several people and that has assisted me in getting back some of my healthy ego I need to overcome some very large obsticles in my life now. I am still growing and will continue to need good friends to help me in that process. I would like to thank each one of you that has befriended me and been a positive influence on my mind and heart. I believe we grow the most when we accept our weaknesses and move forward to strengthen that part of ourselves. It is the careful help of friends that help us to honestly look at those parts of ourselves that need that work.
Please continue to help by expressing your fears and hopes and showing how you have grown from the pain and hurt that has molded your life. Hugs to all !!!
First of all, I usually read all of the posts. And each of you seem to have several points in common about your fears and experiences. I, too, share many of them.
Starfyre, I especially enjoyed your most recent confession. There were so many points in it that touched a place inside me. I feel most fortunate at times, in that I had a rather average middle-class childhood. But the time and generation in which I was raised made a big difference in my personality and life experiences.
It was my misfortune to have a mother that was raised by very strick and overbearing parents. She also developed severe hormonal deficiencies during my early childhood, ages 8 and upwards. This affected her mood and mental state. And by the time I was 11, she had so demoralized me that my only thought was how I was going to kill her when I was old enough.
You would think that being raised in a Christian family, I would never consider doing such. But her mental and emotional abuse so affected me, that I became like a caged and tortured animal.
I don't think I have even now completely outgrown that part of my life. And her treatment of me, along with things my dad said early in my development, has weakened my self-esteem for most of my adult life.
Being a member here at Lit. has helped me immensely. I have found and made good friends with several people and that has assisted me in getting back some of my healthy ego I need to overcome some very large obsticles in my life now. I am still growing and will continue to need good friends to help me in that process. I would like to thank each one of you that has befriended me and been a positive influence on my mind and heart. I believe we grow the most when we accept our weaknesses and move forward to strengthen that part of ourselves. It is the careful help of friends that help us to honestly look at those parts of ourselves that need that work.
Please continue to help by expressing your fears and hopes and showing how you have grown from the pain and hurt that has molded your life. Hugs to all !!!
sortacurious
Je suis prête
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2002
- Posts
- 5,250
Batchoohus said:
Batch,
Freya is so right. I think most of us at one time or another have developed feelings for someone here at Lit. It makes you feel alive, and gives you hope. I know I've been where I look forward to any contact with that person, I laugh at their posts when I see them, everything about them brightens my world. It's really hard when those feelings are not returned. It hurts just as much as if you were face to face with that person. Especially when it feels like that is the person you've been waiting for. I learned that while there are success stories here...FOR ME, it's best to not let those feelings develop. For someone to capture this heart now, I would have to believe they were sincere and actually wanted it once it was captured. This was a lesson that I needed to learn, but it crushed me. I'm sorry you are having to go through it.
Please don't let your hurt keep you away. Feel your anger, feel your pain, and know that it is not stupid or pathetic, but very real. Don't go.
Freya
gmilf
- Joined
- Apr 8, 2002
- Posts
- 42,367
All those threads on abuse and pain really brought up some horrible memories today....was feeling really quite shitty and down on myself, and not really sure why....it's not my fault my parents were/are nasty people.
Told my "friend" last night how I felt about what he did last weekend to me, and how it made me question a very good friendship, and how much I disliked that. Talked to my girlfriend about how I felt about it too...admitted that I questioned her loyalty and my trust in her...she understands, he apologized...it's all good!
Still feeling a bit of hurt over the comment made by my other friend Thursday night.....will not confront her about it as I think her essentially self-centred nature would not allow her to understand anyways. I feel good about myself because I helped her through a rough time last night, and let her know I'd be there for her all the way through. I am a good friend, and I will not question that about myself anymore.
Am very happy that my forthright honesty with people sometimes actually sinks into their heads. Funny, I can usually stand up for my friends to the death, but when it comes to someone hurting me I turn into a quiet little mouse. But for once I confronted someone on their treatment of me, and it made such a huge difference...hopefully it will last and hopefully I will be able to continue defending myself from now on. I deserve to not be treated like shit.
Admitted some stupid, juvenile jealousy tonight...it was silly but methinks my feelings run deep here and that is why.
Looked up sappy love poems today to reflect how I am feeling lately....like a teenager with a crush...but having an awful lot of thumps and flutters from deep inside me. Wishes I had money to make a trip and hopes it's not too soon to think/feel this way.
I am so happy I waited up tonight for someone to get home.....he puts a smile on my face and I needed it after today. Amazing how someone can boost your self-esteem simply by existing in the same world as you.
Is going to try and feel as beautiful inside and out as people seem to be telling me I am lately. For whatever reason I have been hearing it a lot, and it makes me wonder if it might just be true.
Will be getting off my lazy ass Monday and getting myself out there, researching possible new careers....thinking of massage therapy as a possibility, and am quite excited by it.
Has KY jelly on her hands and a smile on her face.....God I LIKE this guy!
Sending hugs to all the girls...NG, Amber, sorta, Marilyth (good luck hunny!), Liza, Batch (you especially), and the guys too! Naded babe, I hope you are feeling better now!
to all and to all a goodnight!
Told my "friend" last night how I felt about what he did last weekend to me, and how it made me question a very good friendship, and how much I disliked that. Talked to my girlfriend about how I felt about it too...admitted that I questioned her loyalty and my trust in her...she understands, he apologized...it's all good!
Still feeling a bit of hurt over the comment made by my other friend Thursday night.....will not confront her about it as I think her essentially self-centred nature would not allow her to understand anyways. I feel good about myself because I helped her through a rough time last night, and let her know I'd be there for her all the way through. I am a good friend, and I will not question that about myself anymore.
Am very happy that my forthright honesty with people sometimes actually sinks into their heads. Funny, I can usually stand up for my friends to the death, but when it comes to someone hurting me I turn into a quiet little mouse. But for once I confronted someone on their treatment of me, and it made such a huge difference...hopefully it will last and hopefully I will be able to continue defending myself from now on. I deserve to not be treated like shit.
Admitted some stupid, juvenile jealousy tonight...it was silly but methinks my feelings run deep here and that is why.
Looked up sappy love poems today to reflect how I am feeling lately....like a teenager with a crush...but having an awful lot of thumps and flutters from deep inside me. Wishes I had money to make a trip and hopes it's not too soon to think/feel this way.
I am so happy I waited up tonight for someone to get home.....he puts a smile on my face and I needed it after today. Amazing how someone can boost your self-esteem simply by existing in the same world as you.
Is going to try and feel as beautiful inside and out as people seem to be telling me I am lately. For whatever reason I have been hearing it a lot, and it makes me wonder if it might just be true.
Will be getting off my lazy ass Monday and getting myself out there, researching possible new careers....thinking of massage therapy as a possibility, and am quite excited by it.
Has KY jelly on her hands and a smile on her face.....God I LIKE this guy!
Sending hugs to all the girls...NG, Amber, sorta, Marilyth (good luck hunny!), Liza, Batch (you especially), and the guys too! Naded babe, I hope you are feeling better now!
to all and to all a goodnight!
Last edited:
sortacurious
Je suis prête
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2002
- Posts
- 5,250
Re: To Starfyre...
I'm so glad you were able to express yourself! {soft warm hugs}.
zetacon4 said:
I'm so glad you were able to express yourself! {soft warm hugs}.
naded
Inked and Scarred
- Joined
- May 14, 2002
- Posts
- 6,500
My went to bed woke back up and need to confess confession:
* Didn't have much family time growing up, folks worked 16 hour days running 2 businesses.
* was in quite a bit of trouble in my senior year of HS, the Army straightened me out thank god
* wishes every day he could trade his life for the soldier who died in my arms so long ago. My son carries his name, he was my first soldier to be in charge of, I was 18, and I still see his blood on my hands.
* has never hated a specific race or creed or sex. But I can never be trusted in the same room with any person from a place calle The Mog.
* was once on CNN, on a stretcher, covered in bandages, and bleeding. And my mother saw it. This was how my mother learned what I really did in the Army.
* hates reporters
* Signed, sealed and sent my letter of intent to resign to my boss today. Not sure how I feel about that.
* Spent 2 weeks in detox (mental and physical) after the Army.
* has the same nightmare every night for the last 7 years
* has walls that can't be climbed and barriers that will never be crossed. I am a mindfield of memories that I will never discuss. Hope she can understand.
* is too tired to continue this
* Didn't have much family time growing up, folks worked 16 hour days running 2 businesses.
* was in quite a bit of trouble in my senior year of HS, the Army straightened me out thank god
* wishes every day he could trade his life for the soldier who died in my arms so long ago. My son carries his name, he was my first soldier to be in charge of, I was 18, and I still see his blood on my hands.
* has never hated a specific race or creed or sex. But I can never be trusted in the same room with any person from a place calle The Mog.
* was once on CNN, on a stretcher, covered in bandages, and bleeding. And my mother saw it. This was how my mother learned what I really did in the Army.
* hates reporters
* Signed, sealed and sent my letter of intent to resign to my boss today. Not sure how I feel about that.
* Spent 2 weeks in detox (mental and physical) after the Army.
* has the same nightmare every night for the last 7 years
* has walls that can't be climbed and barriers that will never be crossed. I am a mindfield of memories that I will never discuss. Hope she can understand.
* is too tired to continue this
Last edited:
Don K Dyck
Devilish Don Downunder
- Joined
- Jun 29, 2002
- Posts
- 8,255
Hey Cloud Dancer . . .
Hey Cloud Dancer, How goes it?? Mending I trust.
naded said:
Hey Cloud Dancer, How goes it?? Mending I trust.
sortacurious
Je suis prête
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2002
- Posts
- 5,250
Starfyre,
I just want to thank you.
You found me in the middle of the night, crying and feeling like such a terrible person. I was feeling so lonely and so lost. And like a really shitty person.
I don't know how you knew I need someone right then, but you did. You listened to my rants, and were so supportive. I was ready to leave Lit. but your friendship and warmth made me realize what I would miss if I did.
You made me smile and laugh, which was exactly what I needed more than anything!
Thank you!
I just want to thank you.
You found me in the middle of the night, crying and feeling like such a terrible person. I was feeling so lonely and so lost. And like a really shitty person.
I don't know how you knew I need someone right then, but you did. You listened to my rants, and were so supportive. I was ready to leave Lit. but your friendship and warmth made me realize what I would miss if I did.
You made me smile and laugh, which was exactly what I needed more than anything!
Thank you!
- Status
