Thoughts from an older man....

[SlutAddicted]

They never had to fuck him. That's not exactly what he was trying to say in his op.
He feels because of the internet that traditional avenues of meeting an attractive women is harder. Technology has passed him by so to speak because he thinks these women are getting lots of offers he can no longer compete with. He thinks his status and age are a factor. In some cases that is true, but not all.

This whole "he feels entitled or sex" thing is just wrong. I'm just so tired of people talking like this. It's not an entitlement issue. The pond has become much much larger because of the internet. He comes from a time where people went up to other people and he feels he had a better chance then. He didn't evolve with the times and that's about it.


Smh

Personally I don't think that the issue here arises from a sense of entitlement to sex.

But if you think all the way through what he said you will see that there is another issue. He starts from the perspective that on his own merit he has no shot with these hot young women. On its own that premise is a bit sad and self-indulgent, but ok fair enough. Wanting to date out of your league so to speak isn't a sin. But then he goes on to more or less blame this situation on the empowerment of women and the fact that they have more options than they did in the past and pose the question what is to be done.

In other words, the empowerment of women is against his interests - because he no longer has a shot with them that results directly from constraining their options - so he would like to see it curtailed.

It is kind of like a long distance runner lamenting the fact that he/she is no longer competitive because there are no longer restraints on the Kenyan and Ethiopian runners. Lamenting the loss of status or competitiveness is perhaps unfortunate, but it is also understandable. The issue is the suggestion that something should be done about it when the it that you want something done about is someone else's empowerment or liberation.

 

[stickygirl]

You nailed it @SlutAddicted

 

[Plasmaball]

Personally I don't think that the issue here arises from a sense of entitlement to sex.

But if you think all the way through what he said you will see that there is another issue. He starts from the perspective that on his own merit he has no shot with these hot young women. On its own that premise is a bit sad and self-indulgent, but ok fair enough. Wanting to date out of your league so to speak isn't a sin. But then he goes on to more or less blame this situation on the empowerment of women and the fact that they have more options than they did in the past and pose the question what is to be done.

But hes not wrong, but its also not a bad thing either. What is to be done is another issue all together.

In other words, the empowerment of women is against his interests - because he no longer has a shot with them that results directly from constraining their options - so he would like to see it curtailed.

Hmmm I'm not sure I agree totally here with the curtailing. I see it more as leveling the playing field to online dating, but not grasping the fact that men out number women when it comes to these. Anyone who has been on lit would understand this by going to the personals or the amateur sections.

It is kind of like a long distance runner lamenting the fact that he/she is no longer competitive because there are no longer restraints on the Kenyan and Ethiopian runners. Lamenting the loss of status or competitiveness is perhaps unfortunate, but it is also understandable. The issue is the suggestion that something should be done about it when the it that you want something done about is someone else's empowerment or liberation.

Time and technology has passed him. Either he adapts or he doesn't. He needs to make himself more attractive to these women in his profile. The idea younger women aren't into his age is wrong way to look at it

 

[Escierto]

There's a world of difference between porn-world, and I include Lit in that, and real world. The OP and men who watch porn may need a reality check, often.

So true! Men get so many stupid ideas from porn and then believe that what they see in porn is reality. Porn has done a tremendous disservice to women in general and transgender women especially.

 

[KatieDoes]

They never had to fuck him. That's not exactly what he was trying to say in his op.
He feels because of the internet that traditional avenues of meeting an attractive women is harder. Technology has passed him by so to speak because he thinks these women are getting lots of offers he can no longer compete with. He thinks his status and age are a factor. In some cases that is true, but not all.

This whole "he feels entitled or sex" thing is just wrong. I'm just so tired of people talking like this. It's not an entitlement issue. The pond has become much much larger because of the internet. He comes from a time where people went up to other people and he feels he had a better chance then. He didn't evolve with the times and that's about it.


Smh

I am 58 and my love/lust for young, gorgeous women has never diminished. Nowadays, because of the technology, we see their images all the time. When one such image makes my heart ache, or my sex drive go to warp factor 10, I always have the same thought: how could I, a humble nobody-in-particular, but a nice man and true gentleman ever even interest this girl?
First, they are often making so much money from their OnlyFans or other pay sites that they certainly don't need a man's financial support, not to mention that precisely because they are so stunning, rich men must offer them the moon and the stars all the time.
I'm not saying I would want a relationship that was based on a financial transaction, I'm saying that in a certain way, the empowerment of women has kind of ruined traditional avenues a man could take to establish a rapport with a woman he fancied.
What is to be done? I actually have quite a lot to offer a young woman, I'm alluding to ways in which I could improve the quality of her life and save her time, while also loving her and receiving love in return. But, the young ones either expect too much, or know they can get it themselves and so are closed to the entreaties of nice men like me, or have gotten caught up in the wave of straight white man hatred that has erupted these recent years.
What is to be done...

You’re bending over backwards to make up excuses for him, to the point of creating an entire line of motivating factors that the original poster did not offer.

I’m sorry if you’re tired of women refusing to deal with men that act entitled access to our bodies. You’re going to need to get used to it, though.

 

[Plasmaball]

You’re bending over backwards to make up excuses for him, to the point of creating an entire line of motivating factors that the original poster did not offer.

I'm a man. My insights to how things look from a male point a view are going to be better than yours. Just like if the op was a female then you would have greater insights as to how it is for a woman.

You aren't the expert here in how he feels. You are the expert in how you conduct yourself on those dating sites. You could come in here and give the woman point of view that sure he has a chance but these steps should be taken to make yourself more attractive.

This place has always been about exploring and enjoy all aspects of sex. Old vs young, 3somes, group, gay, trans, wearing women's clothes, etc etc.

I’m sorry if you’re tired of women refusing to deal with men that act entitled access to our bodies. You’re going to need to get used to it, though.

It's not that simple. You can't have your Cake amd eat too. You can't claim that'd you are entitled and then use your body on onlyfans to create " relationships" with men to get you more money. This isn't one sided..it never has been. I'm glad women have more power when choosing, but let's not be ignorant to the fact that a lot of women use their bodies as well to make money and "dupe" men.

Which also as we are here is the man's fault as well for buying into the fact that these women really like them.

In no way am I saying this should stop because I want to see women in traditional roles. I don't, but context matters with these issues.


Society has shifted and the op doesn't know how to handle it. Maybe he is getting ahead of himself thinking he can get these women..the issue is before when he could walk up to a woman and say hello he stood a chance. Now it's impersonal.

I was never one to walk up to a woman like that but I get the idea around why someone doesn't like this change.

 

[JenniZinc]

Famous quote of Lee Trevino, I'm told.

It was in the bible

 

[JenniZinc]

I am 58 and my love/lust for young, gorgeous women has never diminished. Nowadays, because of the technology, we see their images all the time. When one such image makes my heart ache, or my sex drive go to warp factor 10, I always have the same thought: how could I, a humble nobody-in-particular, but a nice man and true gentleman ever even interest this girl?
First, they are often making so much money from their OnlyFans or other pay sites that they certainly don't need a man's financial support, not to mention that precisely because they are so stunning, rich men must offer them the moon and the stars all the time.
I'm not saying I would want a relationship that was based on a financial transaction, I'm saying that in a certain way, the empowerment of women has kind of ruined traditional avenues a man could take to establish a rapport with a woman he fancied.
What is to be done? I actually have quite a lot to offer a young woman, I'm alluding to ways in which I could improve the quality of her life and save her time, while also loving her and receiving love in return. But, the young ones either expect too much, or know they can get it themselves and so are closed to the entreaties of nice men like me, or have gotten caught up in the wave of straight white man hatred that has erupted these recent years.
What is to be done...

As a 55 year old woman I can only say I hope you at one stage get over your delusions. Younger women will only be interested in draining one thing and it won't be between your legs. You may of course charm one with your knowledge of KISS and the original Porky's movie, but aside from that you're going to be treading a lonely path.

 

[JenniZinc]

Maybe you could work on developing a personality that is appealing to women.

Love it! When I read his post in my mind the voice is Stuey from Family Guy

 

[KatieDoes]

I'm a man. My insights to how things look from a male point a view are going to be better than yours. Just like if the op was a female then you would have greater insights as to how it is for a woman.

You aren't the expert here in how he feels. You are the expert in how you conduct yourself on those dating sites. You could come in here and give the woman point of view that sure he has a chance but these steps should be taken to make yourself more attractive.

This place has always been about exploring and enjoy all aspects of sex. Old vs young, 3somes, group, gay, trans, wearing women's clothes, etc etc.





It's not that simple. You can't have your Cake amd eat too. You can't claim that'd you are entitled and then use your body on onlyfans to create " relationships" with men to get you more money. This isn't one sided..it never has been. I'm glad women have more power when choosing, but let's not be ignorant to the fact that a lot of women use their bodies as well to make money and "dupe" men.

Which also as we are here is the man's fault as well for buying into the fact that these women really like them.

In no way am I saying this should stop because I want to see women in traditional roles. I don't, but context matters with these issues.


Society has shifted and the op doesn't know how to handle it. Maybe he is getting ahead of himself thinking he can get these women..the issue is before when he could walk up to a woman and say hello he stood a chance. Now it's impersonal.

I was never one to walk up to a woman like that but I get the idea around why someone doesn't like this change.

Oh, bullshit.

Women have autonomy. And agency. And the ability to choose to spend time with men whose company we enjoy, for the sake of enjoying their company.

This dinosaur is grumpy because women don’t require men to be able to have a bank account and a mortgage anymore.

That you would bend over backwards to mansplain that speaks volumes.

 

[Plasmaball]

Oh, bullshit.

Not at all. This is reality.

Women have autonomy. And agency. And the ability to choose to spend time with men whose company we enjoy, for the sake of enjoying their company.

We all do. Nobody should be forced to spend time with someone they don't want. Nobody is arguing this.

This dinosaur is grumpy because women don’t require men to be able to have a bank account and a mortgage anymore.

Yeah no. That's not what he said and until he says it he hasn't.

That you would bend over backwards to mansplain that speaks volumes.

ah mansplain. That's the issue here. People like you with chips on their shoulders who don't like it when men talk back becsuse you feel they have had all the advantages up until recently. So there fore it doesn't matter how far it swings the other way you are justified in your crap..

Yeah nah don't work like that kiddo. This is a give and take world and you don't get to have it all.


How about this..next time you post some woman issue you are having you can tag me and I'll tell you how you should be feeling and how you feel because as a man I know better.

Get the fuck out of here. You wouldn't accept that but I'm supposed to accept that now because I'm mansplain?

Oh boy, you in for some rough shit.

 

[Plasmaball]

If you genuinely think that most women on porn sites and erotic online forums are not exaggerating or delving into pure fantasy when talking about older men, then my popcorn bucket is overflowing!!

Fantasies are based on reality. Things you would do. Regardless of how dark or light they are. One may not act on them but they are desires. So the idea a woman wouldn't like am older man? Lol..ok.

If you say yes then I think we are on another level here

The thing is, if you take data from dating apps, then yes, a significant number of women would show as preferring older partners. Whatever the fuck Badoo is returns 26% of women aged 18-24 preferring men over the age of 35. This was in 2018. But what type of woman goes on dating apps versus the women that prefers only hanging out in public? In certain social circles only? Versus the woman that just has an OnlyFans and uses her Twitter/Instagram? Versus the woman that uses dating apps that aren't Badoo?? (Like Tinder, Hinge, Bumble...)

Um there has been a shift to where more women prefer dating sites over going out. Which is their choice. Does it affect society? Yes. See incels, but they are free to do what they like.

So if a guy wants to fuck anybody, he should at least give it a decent try because, like you said, there are women who fuck older men. But usually, they fuck the older men that have something going for them. Women in this age group, in this time, are trending toward having fewer children (which older men usually don't want to do), and they are starting to have more in common with older men media-wise due to the Information Age making such media more available, so basically...

You need a personality.

I don't disagree with this. But this What basically should have been said at the start. Not younger women don't want you. He needs to sell himself better and maybe he will get lucky. He has to understand it's a giant pond and he's a small fish now.

 

[KatieDoes]

Not at all. This is reality.


We all do. Nobody should be forced to spend time with someone they don't want. Nobody is

I am 58 and my love/lust for young, gorgeous women has never diminished. Nowadays, because of the technology, we see their images all the time. When one such image makes my heart ache, or my sex drive go to warp factor 10, I always have the same thought: how could I, a humble nobody-in-particular, but a nice man and true gentleman ever even interest this girl?
First, they are often making so much money from their OnlyFans or other pay sites that they certainly don't need a man's financial support, not to mention that precisely because they are so stunning, rich men must offer them the moon and the stars all the time.
I'm not saying I would want a relationship that was based on a financial transaction,
What is to be done? I actually have quite a lot to offer a young woman, I'm alluding to ways in which I could improve the quality of her life and save her time, while also loving her and receiving love in return. But, the young ones either expect too much, or know they can get it themselves and so are closed to the entreaties of nice men like me, or have gotten caught up in the wave of straight white man hatred that has erupted these recent years.
What is to be done...

ah mansplain. That's the issue here. People like you with chips on their shoulders who don't like it when men talk back becsuse you feel they have had all the advantages up until recently. So there fore it doesn't matter how far it swings the other way you are justified in your crap..

Yeah nah don't work like that kiddo. This is a give and take world and you don't get to have it all.


How about this..next time you post some woman issue you are having you can tag me and I'll tell you how you should be feeling and how you feel because as a man I know better.

Get the fuck out of here. You wouldn't accept that but I'm supposed to accept that now because I'm mansplain?

Oh boy, you in for some rough shit.

He.
Did.
Say.
It.

 

[Plasmaball]

Current literature disagrees with this statement. I can't be assed to continue because dinner's almost ready and you...

...seem kinda heated

Fantasies aren't desires....ok..that's amusing.

Not at all actually. Don't assume things you don't know.

 

[Plasmaball]

He.
Did.
Say.
It.

1) they don't need his support money wise so he feels he must offer other things, but alot of women aren't into those things.
2) they expect too much...so..what? None of that's says what you want it to say.

In none of that does he talk about control. He talks about how society has shifted and he doesn't know how to adjust to it. He thinks younger women want x,y,z, and he can't compete with that.

Shrug..

 

[KatieDoes]

1) they don't need his support money wise so he feels he must offer other things, but alot of women aren't into those things.
2) they expect too much...so..what? None of that's says what you want it to say.

In none of that does he talk about control. He talks about how society has shifted and he doesn't know how to adjust to it. He thinks younger women want x,y,z, and he can't compete with that.

Shrug..

I suspect that your need to defend his beliefs stems from you sharing them.

It is 2023. Women can support themselves. We no longer require a man to obtain credit or a mortgage. Now women are free to choose whether or not we share our time with a man, based on whether we enjoy being with him or not.

A lot of men are struggling with that. This dinosaur clearly is, and your posts appear as if you are, too.

Good men… men that are emotionally mature, capable, competent partners, attract women and always will. Men that have nothing to offer aside from things that women no longer need, will not attract women.

Rather than lamenting that women have options, I’d suggest devoting your energy to becoming a better option.


Or don’t…. We’re all becoming bi curious out here for a reason

 

[Escierto]

I suspect that your need to defend his beliefs stems from you sharing them.

It is 2023. Women can support themselves. We no longer require a man to obtain credit or a mortgage. Now women are free to choose whether or not we share our time with a man, based on whether we enjoy being with him or not.

A lot of men are struggling with that. This dinosaur clearly is, and your posts appear as if you are, too.

Good men… men that are emotionally mature, capable, competent partners, attract women and always will. Men that have nothing to offer aside from things that women no longer need, will not attract women.

Rather than lamenting that women have options, I’d suggest devoting your energy to becoming a better option.


Or don’t…. We’re all becoming bi curious out here for a reason

That last line. I have always wondered why most women (maybe all?) would not be lesbians. Men are so unappealing I don’t understand why any woman would want to be with one. They commit most of the crime, they are not interested in caring for others, they are interested in violence and controlling others etc. Really I can’t name a single thing men have going for them.

 

[KatieDoes]

That last line. I have always wondered why most women (maybe all?) would not be lesbians. Men are so unappealing I don’t understand why any woman would want to be with one. They commit most of the crime, they are not interested in caring for others, they are interested in violence and controlling others etc. Really I can’t name a single thing men have going for them.

I hate to be the NotAllMen person… ( believe me, I HATE TO ) but damn, the rare great one is an amazing find.

I mean… knowing what you know of me, can you imagine how badass the man is that makes me feel safe enough to submit to him, sexually? A rare find, but worth the search to find him, and worth cherishing what he brings to my life.


Most of these fuckers can fuck right off, though

 

[policywank]

But hes not wrong, but its also not a bad thing either. What is to be done is another issue all together.


Hmmm I'm not sure I agree totally here with the curtailing. I see it more as leveling the playing field to online dating, but not grasping the fact that men out number women when it comes to these. Anyone who has been on lit would understand this by going to the personals or the amateur sections.


Time and technology has passed him. Either he adapts or he doesn't. He needs to make himself more attractive to these women in his profile. The idea younger women aren't into his age is wrong way to look at it

There is no need to level the playing field. It is already level. It is just that when it comes to sexual dynamics between genders (online or in real life) women have the stronger team (metaphorically speaking).

When it comes to areas where men have the advantage they see equality in terms of opportunity. If we were talking about an actual team sport chances are the men would have the stronger team. Given equal opportunity to compete women should not expect to win many games. And the only way to achieve equal outcomes would be to constrain the men or give the women an advantage - either of which would be quite rightly protested as unfair by the men.

But when it comes to an area where women have the advantage men want equality of outcome and apparently see no problem with constraining women to achieve that.

 

[stickygirl]

There is no need to level the playing field. It is already level. It is just that when it comes to sexual dynamics between genders (online or in real life) women have the stronger team (metaphorically speaking).

When it comes to areas where men have the advantage they see equality in terms of opportunity. If we were talking about an actual team sport chances are the men would have the stronger team. Given equal opportunity to compete women should not expect to win many games. And the only way to achieve equal outcomes would be to constrain the men or give the women an advantage - either of which would be quite rightly protested as unfair by the men.

But when it comes to an area where women have the advantage men want equality of outcome and apparently see no problem with constraining women to achieve that.

That brings to mind a couple of ongoing issues in Formula One racing. Firstly the FIA rule book didn't allow for 'disabled' drivers to compete in single seat cars until 2021 when Billy Monger argued his case - he lost the lower half of both legs in a F3 crash. The other one is power-steering in F2 and F3 which is making it harder for women, from progressing on to F1, where power steering is normal. The formula rules have been based on male physiques. The pressure is now on to force that change, but done yet.

Sorry I digressed, but the point is the rules we've inherited today are often male-orientated and need to change. I've gotta go prep supper. England's Lionesses are playing Belgium later

 

[raceryz]

Listen, aknowledge and engage. Be helpful and no man buns

 

[KatieDoes]

‘Man buns’ are just buns. Most women don’t care how a man chooses to keep his hair out of his face when he needs to.

 

[RoperTrace]

It was in the bible

Well, Lee is pretty old.
(edit): My long-departed BIL was a golf pro, who got to hang out with Trevino at Pebble Beach one year, and Lee used that line when a smoking hot lady walked through the bar. Lee had a slightly more vulgar variation of the quote, I'm told.

 

[silver gurl]

‘Man buns’ are just buns. Most women don’t care how a man chooses to keep his hair out of his face when he needs to.

Speak for yourself.

 

[KatieDoes]

Speak for yourself.

That’s why I said ‘most’