The unappreciated limerick

[EmilyMiller]

It’s the time of year for vay-kay
For Emily less work and more play
When down on The Shore
Wanna fuck like a whore
The problem: I just want to stay

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

When discussing flat versus curved
through inuendo, the comnments did swerve
to buxom or flat,
what's the value in that?
The joy's not in volume, but verve.

 

[feel_the_beast]

This one may be in here already, in one form or another, but I'm not reading 35 pages to see.

There was a young man from Devizes
Whose balls were of different sizes
The one was so small
It was no use at all
But the other was huge and won prizes

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

How big are my balls, you ask.
That's rude, it's boorish and crass
It's my pronouns, you see,
I've changed them to she
besides, they sit on a shelf in a flask

 

[SimonDoom]

The limerick gets no respect.
It's insulted and often hen-pecked.
There's no disputation
O'er its poor reputation.
So, really, what can one expect?

 

[CharleneBarr]

Clyde Hyde spied;

Clyde Hyde tried;

Mercy, mercy!

Negative. Curse. He,

Hyde, fried, died.​

 

[Smuttyandfun]

There was a young lady from Wheeling
Who said she had no sexual feeling
'til a young man named Boris
Touched her clitoris
And she had to be scraped from the ceiling

 

[EmilyMiller]

Our heroines go back thirty years
Em and Lily must conquer their fears
And fuck several creatures
With very large… features
While singing to some Britney Spears

- my forthcoming Halloween story (publishes tomorrow)

 

[Steadfast421]

There once was a Communist lass
Who would always flaunt her fine ass,
There’s no comrade yet
To whom she’s said “Nyet”
You can read all about it in Tass.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

There once was a girl, name of Kreemi
Whose visage, demure yet so dreamy,
would, with wistful sigh, <---Say this line three times fast.
break hearts far and nigh,
leaving dreams in her wake so unseemly

 

[AlinaX]

I 'borrowed' my sister's green dress
And sat on Dad's lap to play chess
His bishop grew quick -
It was really quite slick -
By the end, the green dress was a mess!

 

[AlinaX]

My daddy has knobbly knees
That I sit on when I want to tease
“Spank me,” I’ll beg
As I pee on his leg
And cry, “Punish me, Daddy! Oh please!”

 

[AlinaX]

There’s a man who lives just round the block
Who his wife keeps secure with a lock
But I’ve copied the key
So when he’s visiting me
We play hickory dickory dock

 

[Steadfast421]

A lovely young woman named Brooke
Never quite learned how to cook
But on a divan
She could please any man
She knew every trick in the book.