The Challenge Club

[Dingus Guy]

Still waiting...

I finished a lousy Valentine Day story at midnight last night just in time for the deadline. I tried to be clever and make it different and non-erotic and I failed miserably. In the end I guess I just wanted an entry, but now I am not sure if they will allow it in. I also await CM's and my purple rash challenge stories. Here is my critique from what I read.

BT- I laughed, you have a clever wit that I love. I wish I could remember to quote something from the beginning of your story, but I read yours first and I forgot. So sorry. I did like the ABSOLUTE bit. I couldn't really get into the eroticism because that was not an important element in your story. It is ok that it is that way. If you wanted it to be more than it was, then the human element had to be giving a stronger emotional attachment. I dug the story as it was.

Reo- I enjoyed your piece, but you sometimes extend your sentences way too long. I do the same thing quite often. If you can break up a sentence than you should always take that approach. That was what I was told by an old english professor I had. Looking at the last sentence of the first paragraph, you mention 'time' twice and I think it gets a little confusing and I had to read it a few times to grasp it. Don't be afraid to make a sentence a few words. e.g.-Jack ran a mile. He found he was quite tired. Yet, he kept the pace despite his discomfort. Instead of: Jack ran a mile and found he was quite tired, despite his discomfort he kept up the pace. Otherwise, I liked the erotic nature of your beasties, especially the fruit feeding.

I too haven't started the scavenger hunt, still mulling over some ideas. Most likely tackle it Sunday.

 

[Guest]

Mine's up. Link is in my siggy.

CM

 

[Dingus Guy]

CM

I just read your story and I think I liked it the best except for the ass play. Never much cared for alien anal invasion. I think most guys wouldn't mind having good alien sex, but I don't want anything invading my doo-doo hatch.

I got my story accepted by like yours, it wasn't posted yet. You can see it in my story link at the bottom. Still waiting to see if my bad Valentine Day story made the cut.

 

[Guest]

There are alot of guys who wouldn't like that, including the one in my story.

The alien thought she was doing something nice for him. Kind of my way of poking fun at how easily things can be misunderstood.

CM

 

[Dingus Guy]

I got that

I enjoyed that aspect of incoming doom. Kind of like when you see someone get hit by the running of the bulls. You kinda feel the pain too.

 

[Guest]

So, how are you doing? Your last couple of posts sound kind of down. Is it just because you are bummed about the way your Valentines story turned out, or is something else going on?

CM

 

[Dingus Guy]

Some personal stuff

It hasn't been a great last few months for me. Trying to deal with it the best way I can, but some days get me down. The Valentine Day story should have been better but I didn't give it quality time and it stunk.

I didn't realize I was that humdrum.

 

[Guest]

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. {{{HUGS}}}

I can sympathize with the humdrum. I know my life is that way (which means that I am too.)

CM

 

[Dingus Guy]

Thanks

I appreciate the hugs. Here is a in return.

 

[Guest]

Thanks for the rose, that was sweet.

CM

 

[Dingus Guy]

My pleasure

You are very deserving. I have a question for you that has been nagging at me since we did SummerMorning's challenge about the Erotic Horror challenge. Did my story offend you with the title or context? I say this because you never gave me any comments on it. Just curious.

I can understand because I called it "The Ith: Rapebeast". Not exactly politically correct. Matter-of-fact, Laurel changed the title before it got accepted. Now it is just "The Ith".

 

[Guest]

Did I not comment on your story at all?? If I didn't, it wasn't because of any offense taken on my part. More like brain being mush from dealing with the kids.

I haven't felt real great the last couple of weeks, so it's more likely that I just overlooked posting about it. I did read it.

It's hard to offend me.

CM

 

[Guest]

Ok, I just looked back and saw that I didn't post anything about your story. I'm sorry that I didn't. I read it right after you posted it. I'm guessing that I never got around to posting about it because either I was immersed in trying to get mine done or the kids were driving me absolutely batty (not to mention the nerve and muscle damage have been giving me hell lately.)

It was a good story with very good descriptive detail. Nice that you left it open for a sequel. I'd be interested to know what happens with the beast and the girl and if the beast really did die.

CM

 

[Dingus Guy]

Thank you CM

I always like to hear feedback whether it is good or bad. Gives me something to strive for. I never intended to have a sequel, but you never say never I guess. The only story I am working to expand is my Ghost Story. I hope to be finish editing the first few chapters and add on after that in the next few weeks.

I hope you are feeling better at least.

 

[Guest]

Re: Thank you CM

I always like to hear feedback whether it is good or bad. Gives me something to strive for. I never intended to have a sequel, but you never say never I guess. The only story I am working to expand is my Ghost Story. I hope to be finish editing the first few chapters and add on after that in the next few weeks.

I hope you are feeling better at least.

Let me know when the sequel to the Ghost story is done, I'd like to read it.

Unfortunately, I am not feeling any better. The weather here has been rainy and damp, so I pretty much feel like someone is trying to rip my muscles out of my skin. I keep thinking one of these days that it will heal. I figure the muscles will eventually. The nerves may or may not. They only heal at a rate of 1/8th of an inch a year as it is, meaning it will be awhile before I will know.

I hope the next few months are better for you than the last few. If you ever need a friend to talk to, I am just a pm away.

CM

 

[Dingus Guy]

U R 2 Sweet

I appreciate the offer and the same goes out to you as well. I have made a promise to send the story out for editing before I submit it. As soon as that is done, you will get notified.

It's too bad you have to deal with such pain. It really sux. I only hope you heal sooner than later!

 

[Guest]

Thanks. You and me both. I'm going to ask hubby for a certificate for a one hour massage for Valentine's Day. I think that would help some, even if only temporarily.

The nerve stuff, though still around, is not as bad as it used to be (was constant for months, now it's just every now and then or is very mild if it's constant), so I am hoping that points toward it healing completely eventually. Neurologist was no help, said it might heal, it might not. The medicines they tried didn't help any, just made it worse.

I'll get there eventually. Writing and posting here helps take my mind off of it.

CM

 

[Dingus Guy]

I could use a massage too

Tell your hubby make it two.
Ever think about trying some voodoo/natural medicine? Stuff like that has been known to help.
I gotta get up early for work tomorrow, so have a great nite! Thanks for the pep chat.

 

[Guest]

You're welcome for the chat.

I don't know of any natural type medicine that will work. Going to a chiropractor would help the muscles (got bones out of whack that irritate them), but I can't afford to go right now.

You have to work on a Saturday? That sucks.

Sweet dreams!

CM

 

[Black Tulip]

Reo,

I had a bit trouble at the start of your story. I think you try to cram too much information in too little sentences. Once past that though, I enjoyed the story. Really alien. Scrambled eggs?

Dingus,

Good story, where can I get a massageboard like that?
I thought the agreement to barter after all, was a bit too abrupt for me. Why would she? She got what she wanted?

 

[reohoko]

LOL thank you Black Tulip. I actually am surprised at myself. I wrote that completely sick. Have to tell you that story sometime. LOL I was so sick I finished exactly two things that week.... all my school work and that story. I will be weeks catching up the house and everything else . I got lucky, my additional stories for Robin LaRouge were just needing editing that week (editing I fail to do correctly ).

I have a ton of schoolwork to do this weekend, at this rate I might not even finish my own challenge. HUGS hope everyone gets to write theirs. Wish me luck that I get this stuff done.

I probably won't be back on the boards this weekend .

Have a great weekend all.

HUGS HUGS HUGS

 

[Dingus Guy]

Barter

Dingus,

Good story, where can I get a massageboard like that?
I thought the agreement to barter after all, was a bit too abrupt for me. Why would she? She got what she wanted?

If you could have amazing orgasms at anytime, what would you pay for such a device? Hence the will to barter. Think about it like this...if you are interested in someone, what would you do to impress them into continue the relationship? Gifts, cooking, a Blowjob, who knows what barter you would exchange for someone you truly care for. In the story, she got what she wanted and she was willing to give up something for more of it. That was the barter.

 

[Black Tulip]

Dingus dear,

Thanks, I had not looked at it that way.
Too much of a mercenary mind I guess, just looking for profit in cash.

By the way, that is the key to your heart you are offering in your AV?

 

[Dingus Guy]

Dingus dear,

By the way, that is the key to your heart you are offering in your AV?

Yes it is, but I am afraid someone put bubble gum in the keyhole.

 

[minsue]

Yes it is, but I am afraid someone put bubble gum in the keyhole.

Damn kids...No respect for anything these days.