Statutory Rape & Such...

[Guest]

Yanno, I've seen this inconsistency several times now on these boards. To the point where I'm beginning to wonder what the true story really is.

I mean, in one story you met your boyfriend (who I am presumming is this Chris fellow) when you were 15, it's now 3 years later, and the two of you are going strong. Great.

Then, in story number 2, you met your "soulmate" at 15, broke up with him last summer (June, I believe it was?) and met Chris less than a month later by illegally signing up on an 18+ dating service. Well, alright.

Then, in story number 3 (which does sort of flow from #2) you've only been dating Chris (met through the illegally signing up on an 18+ dating service) only for something like 10 months.

I'm just curious. Which story is correct? I mean, if you met Chris when you were 15 and you met last summer, then - uh oh! That would only make you 16 and, uh, I do believe Lit would need to be notified to cancel your account.

I think instead of getting upset with the "morons" on this board, you need to figure out which story you are doling out as truth.

I've actually been waiting for someone to pick that up but I didn't think anyone would actually have the time on their hands (or care enough to bother since no one really listens to me normally) to read back and study my relationship timelines. Your mistake is in the fact that you didn't add them *all* up. They're all the same guy... broke up briefly (a month) and got back together. It really depends on my mood how I refer to it but usually I would refer to Chris and I as having been together for 10.5 months now because that's how long it has been since we got back together. On this thread our relationship during my 15-16 phase is more relevant so I refer to that time period.

Never could figure out why you seem to want to knock me down, Chele, but before you run around and accuse me of being too young to be on lit... maybe you should get to know me first. And I don't get upset with the morons on this board, I happen to love 95% of the people I've met here... I just hate some of the morons on this thread.

 

[MiloDRemix]

I think instead of getting upset with the "morons" on this board, you need to figure out which story you are doling out as truth.

LMAO... I actually mentioned this to Tania a week ago and she said (and this is a direct quote from our AIM chat):

Tania [1:05 AM]: Yea I keep wondering if I should clarify my relationship history but then I realize that no one really gives a damn anyhow so why should I waste my time.

Guess someone does give a damn, eh? And the thing is... Tania doesn't need to try to figure out which 'story' is the truth. It's far more entertaining watching other people try to uncover some evil lurking secret .

 

[Guest]

Milo, I'm just kind of worried that you save all of our chats, lol. Then again, I do that with Chris so... can't really talk I guess. If you want to uncover a really dark secret of mine... my board name was registered when I was still 17

BUT... my boyfriend was present and he's over the 18 age requirement to be on lit AND we were looking up sex tips *together so*... maybe that will make it okay with the literotica gestapo.

Any secrets you'd like to get out, Miles?

 

[SexyChele]

I've actually been waiting for someone to pick that up but I didn't think anyone would actually have the time on their hands (or care enough to bother since no one really listens to me normally) to read back and study my relationship timelines. Your mistake is in the fact that you didn't add them *all* up. They're all the same guy... broke up briefly (a month) and got back together. It really depends on my mood how I refer to it but usually I would refer to Chris and I as having been together for 10.5 months now because that's how long it has been since we got back together. On this thread our relationship during my 15-16 phase is more relevant so I refer to that time period.

Never could figure out why you seem to want to knock me down, Chele, but before you run around and accuse me of being too young to be on lit... maybe you should get to know me first. And I don't get upset with the morons on this board, I happen to love 95% of the people I've met here... I just hate some of the morons on this thread.

Now that ranks as one of the most lame excuses I've ever heard. Yeah, right. Whatever, little girl. The proof in the pudding. You stated in one of your posts that you signed onto a dating service (illegally, self-admittedly) last summer and that is where you met Chris. Now you hand out this explanation? Please. At least have the imagination to be more creative that that! Or simply get your stories straight.

Why do I knock you down? Easy. And I don't have to say it in private. I suspect you are a 16 year old girl involved with a 25 year old man. I also suspect you lied to get on Lit - just as you admitted lying to get on the dating service that you met Chris at. Does it matter to me? Nope. It would to the owner of the site, however.

 

[MiloDRemix]

Any secrets you'd like to get out, Miles?

Nah, I'm good. I'm 20 years old and I don't do anything illegal... at least not for the last year or so... okay, the last half a year or so. I'm just enjoying the sick pleasure you get out of confusing people in an effort to keep them from getting close to you or 'figuring you out'. In the words of your old therapist at least,

 

[Guest]

Now that ranks as one of the most lame excuses I've ever heard. Yeah, right. Whatever, little girl. The proof in the pudding. You stated in one of your posts that you signed onto a dating service (illegally, self-admittedly) last summer and that is where you met Chris. Now you hand out this explanation? Please. At least have the imagination to be more creative that that! Or simply get your stories straight.

Why do I knock you down? Easy. And I don't have to say it in private. I suspect you are a 16 year old girl involved with a 25 year old man. I also suspect you lied to get on Lit - just as you admitted lying to get on the dating service that you met Chris at. Does it matter to me? Nope. It would to the owner of the site, however.

You need to get a serious grip or at least quit harassing me and move on to someone who cares about your threats. My explanation does fit if you cared to ponder it for ten seconds and last summer I was still 17 - duh (for lack of a better word). Turned 18 this year, thanks for asking. You can suspect whatever you want and start as much crap as you want... but I can prove to the owner of the site that I'm 18 and you'd just be wasting everyone's time with your vendetta.

 

[MiloDRemix]

https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=175802&perpage=20&pagenumber=33

You've done this to Tania before, Chele, acted like you knew everything that was going on in her life and blah blah blah. You ended your long bit of 'advice' on the All About Roleplaying thread for Tania with, "I know you won't listen, and that's fine." and Tania replied, "All in all, I cannot listen to you because you don't know anything that's going on in my relationship. Do you understand that? You think you know and you think you have it all figured out... but you don't know Chris and you don't know anything about our relationship but the small bit I've posted on this board. You assume that we're following some little preset stereotype that you have all figured out... but I have news for you, there are things you'll never know about Chris and I and those are the things that I base my decisions on."

I think that what Tania said above applies to this current issue with you as well. You think you have her all figured out and you think you have her relationship all figured out just from a few posts on an erotica board.
And Tania really shouldn't have to justify herself to you. She could tell lies about her date with the fluffy pink bunny man from last night and what business of yours would it be? She hasn't lied but you sure seem to want that to be the case, and for what purpose? Your reply on the All About Roleplaying thread was downright insulting and no one who knows Tania agreed with your assessment there. If you want to offer advice or threaten someone, at least get your facts straight before you go off on a psychotic accusatory rant.

 

[Guest]

Just forget it, Milo. The weird thing for me is that I've always found Chele's posts to be entertaining and well thought out unless they were dictated to me as in the roleplaying thread and this latest bunch of crap. She says she knocks me down because she *thinks* I'm 16... ::shrugs:: I guess she's just one of those people who don't like teenagers?

Or maybe I'm just making a crazy assumption... but then it seems like that's happening around here a lot lately.

Last post on this thread. Just gets me in trouble . 'Night everyone...

 

[Cloacamaximus]

I do not think that much of this is helping Milo or Draker. They asked for help and advice on a difficult question, and few have given it to them. Perhaps because of the draconian laws that exist in the United States, there is no easy answer, or any answer at all.

The Mann Act is a catchall act whose original (putative) purpose was to prevent the kidnapping of women (not especially minors) for the purposes of prostitution in other states of the federal United States. It is not clear to what extent such a problem seriously existed at the time of enactment ("the White Slave Trade"). It has since been used to prevent adult men and women establishing a mistress or lover in another state of the union, and to prosecute young lovers.

I can see that this thread has generated a lot of heat and is therefore pertinent to the way a number of people live their lives now. It appears to be an old conundrum between states rights and federal law. And it seems to me that the real issue is if you have a Constitution and a Bill of Rights, then it is a fundamental principle of those rights that it should incorporate a set of human rights that guarantees the most basic of human affairs, i.e. the right to choose a sexual partner, in any state of the union, with the certainty that crossing a state line will not turn you into a criminal. For maters as serious as this to the individual, there should be ONE law in any modern sovereign state.

Or if not that, then at the VERY LEAST, the right to change your abode and take advantage of a regime more conducive to your situation and needs.

As regards the age difference, I asked my wife, a teacher of some 25 years standing. Her reply was that she saw nothing wrong with it and had known many women of 16 that had more sense and maturity than men of 24 and beyond.

I would add that probably none of us know the individuals concerned and are consequently totally unaware of the relative maturity, intelligence or experience of the parties. Yet this has not stopped others speculating upon them and then passing judgement based on their speculations. What is necessary is that infatuation is not confused with love. If the parents are so insensitive then this could be a problem. But there is no evidence of this.

I repeat, that in many western civilised countries the age of consent is 16 or below.

I am sorry Milo and Draker that I cannot offer you better help. But since you have had the will to raise this issue, you may consider a campaign to change the situation. You are surely not the only people in this situation. And believe me, such campaigns can and do work.

Finally, you should all remember that one of the greatest love stories ever written concerned a 13 year old woman and an older man. Loyal unto death.

Regards to Harold.

 

[MiloDRemix]

Thank you for your post, Cloacamaximus. It helps to hear from someone who isn't violently against the younger/older relationship... my brother, Draker, was even cheered up by your comments and your wife's feelings on the matter. It's nice to know that not everyone thinks he's some sort of twisted pervert just because he fell in love with someone who's younger than he is. I just don't know how one would go about trying to have the laws looked at and 'adjusted'... and they would probably still be unfair at any conclusion. It's just a bad situation...

 

[lovechild27]

Man...i dont know why I came back to read any of this crap. Vixen was right when she said maturity doesnt equall experience. I still dont get WHY you wouldnt want to live a little...be your age and date guys who you wont land in jail.

A man who dates a girl that young has issues. 16 may be legal to do somethings, but it is a far cry from being an adult Harold. Nice that your so trusting of your own kids that you can trust every screwed up decision that they may make...tell me are you just scared to not like something they do because it may reflect badly on you?

Milo and Tania...really get a life. Accept that people have different opinions and outlooks and this subject. ONE PERSON having a relationshiop with an older guy DOESNT mean its ok tania. And if you broke up so many times with this guy...were you really THAT mature in the first place??

 

[Guest]

Man...i dont know why I came back to read any of this crap. Vixen was right when she said maturity doesnt equall experience. I still dont get WHY you wouldnt want to live a little...be your age and date guys who you wont land in jail.

A man who dates a girl that young has issues. 16 may be legal to do somethings, but it is a far cry from being an adult Harold. Nice that your so trusting of your own kids that you can trust every screwed up decision that they may make...tell me are you just scared to not like something they do because it may reflect badly on you?

Milo and Tania...really get a life. Accept that people have different opinions and outlooks and this subject. ONE PERSON having a relationshiop with an older guy DOESNT mean its ok tania. And if you broke up so many times with this guy...were you really THAT mature in the first place??

You hate this thread so much and yet you keep reviving it... that's what I don't really understand. You get kicks out of insulting people? Really nice gal you are. As for my relationship... we 'separated' once for 23 days when my boyfriend had to do some traveling and thought he was going to have to relocate across the country. Through a wonderful twist in fate we got back together... and yes, I do think we are very mature. Sorry you don't think so but I really find it hard to respect your opinion when you're so rude and mocking all of the time.

 

[MiloDRemix]

Milo and Tania...really get a life. Accept that people have different opinions and outlooks and this subject. ONE PERSON having a relationshiop with an older guy DOESNT mean its ok tania. And if you broke up so many times with this guy...were you really THAT mature in the first place??

I don't understand why you keep griping at me - I told you that I respect and understand your opinion. I was perfectly civil to you as long as you were civil. It's a two way street, honey. You can't come on here and be a bitch and misspell *relationship and expect me to lay down and take your insults. And where did you get off on the whole 'ONE PERSON'... more than one person just on this thread has opened up and come forth on the subject. It's not a horribly uncommon scenario. And Tania didn't even break up with her boyfriend... they took a break from each other... ONCE. At least get your facts straight, please.

 

[Weird Harold]

16 may be legal to do somethings, but it is a far cry from being an adult Harold. Nice that your so trusting of your own kids that you can trust every screwed up decision that they may make...tell me are you just scared to not like something they do because it may reflect badly on you?

There's a big difference between trusting someone to make the "right" decision and being afraid of their actions reflecting badly on me. I raised my daughters to be able to make rational decisions and trust them to make their own mistakes. I'm proudof how they turned out and no decision they could possibly make would make me think it refelcted badly on the way I raised them.


You conveniently ignore the point that over half the world considers 16 to be adult enough to make relationship decisons. The USA is virtually the only place in he world where 16 is NOT adult enough and it isn't even a universal legal stricture here. In fact, if Wisconsin conformed to the Federal/Military age of consent (16), this thread would never have existed.

 

[babydoll_73]

I can't help with the legal aspect of this because I am in Illinois and I am 22 and my finace is 22 also so I don't have to worry about this. But here is my opinion. I hope nobody thinks I am judging them because I am not.


In general I think that 16 year old have some growing up to do. The ones that I do know can be mature at times and incredibly(sp) immature at other times. But here is where the gereralities end. Since I don't know every 16 year old out there (or the people in question) personally I can not say that they are not mature. There are alot of laws that are pointless. This one I see as being one that should be enforced when a person is under the age of 16. 16 year olds can make alot of choices. I feel that if the parents have met the person(just in general) and agree that it is ok for the 16 year old to see them that the law should be overlooked. I think that the law comes in handy when a person is 13, or 14 and under. So basically I think it should be the parents that are ruling over this type of thing not the law. The goverment does not know all people so it can't know that so and so is not being forced into the relationship or sex with the older person. I hope this makes sense. If it doesn't then post and I will try to clear it up.

I hope everything works out for your brother Milo.

 

[MiloDRemix]

"I hope everything works out for your brother Milo."
Thanks babydoll ... things are working just fine between my bro and his young love. They'll most likely be getting married before this year is out. A small affair and then they're going to have a huge ceremony and throw the wedding they really want when she graduates high school and they both have more time for parties, honeymoons, and house shopping .

I understand what you're trying to say in your post and for the most part I agree with it... I feel like 16 is old enough to be able to consent in a relationship and that if the parents are okay with it then the law shouldn't be able to override and punish the people involved. But the problem is that there will always be a few exceptions... some parents don't care enough or know enough about their children to be able to offer an intelligent opinion on such a matter. And there are always going to be a few older guys who are taking advantage of younger girls. That's why I won't really take a definite stand for or against this issue and choose rather to focus on my brother's situation... there are too many variables. All I know is that my brother and his girl are sincerely in love and work perfectly together, so I support them based on what I've seen in the individual situation.

Maybe that's what I believe should be done in general... you should be judged based on your situation rather than a preset age limit.

 

[James G 5]

But the problem is that there will always be a few exceptions... some parents don't care enough or know enough about their children to be able to offer an intelligent opinion on such a matter. And there are always going to be a few older guys who are taking advantage of younger girls. That's why I won't really take a definite stand for or against this issue and choose rather to focus on my brother's situation... there are too many variables. All I know is that my brother and his girl are sincerely in love and work perfectly together, so I support them based on what I've seen in the individual situation.

Maybe that's what I believe should be done in general... you should be judged based on your situation rather than a preset age limit.

See, you're kind of agreeing with what some of us said tho
It goes back to my analogy about seatbelt laws
They're there to protect all of us from the exingencies of a few
It becomes ponderous & practically impossible to deal with things like this on a case-by-case basis, so it's a risk management issues to say "There is great potential here for harm & abuse so we will dissallow it entirely rather than leaving one well uncapped for a child to fall down"

 

[MiloDRemix]

Never really cared to agree or disagree with anyone... my only problem is when people start getting rude and deliberately provoking & insulting the other posters (but I'm going to just ignore those people from now on and spare myself the pain of trying to have an intelligent discussion with them). I've tried to keep my personal opinions on the overall issue to myself because there is far more gray area than black or white area concerning the statutory rape laws. Makes for a great deal of friction that I don't really want to get involved in... mainly because my opinion won't change anything. I prefer to focus on facts because those are the only things that matter.
I believe that the age of consent should be lowered to 15 or 16 in all of the states but that isn't going to change reality so there's no point in my fighting about it. I'm just going to ignore other people's negativity and help my bro plan his wedding .

 

[James G 5]

I believe that the age of consent should be lowered to 15 or 16 in all of the states but that isn't going to change reality so there's no point in my fighting about it.

What about a sliding scale like Florida uses where a 15 or 16 year old can consent up to a certain age partner, said age climbing each year till she's 18 & can be with anyone?

 

[MiloDRemix]

What about a sliding scale like Florida uses where a 15 or 16 year old can consent up to a certain age partner, said age climbing each year till she's 18 & can be with anyone?

Words cannot even begin to describe what I think of that plan. Well, maybe a few words like "sucks" and "horrible"... I don't really think that age should be a factor in how much you love someone. If you're 16 and in love with a 30 year old but are only allowed to date anyone up to age 18... that's just ridiculous. Like I said, the law will never be ultimately 'fair' unless each case was judged on individual merit. Even then it wouldn't be fair because no one else really has the right to judge someone else's relationship... Which brings me back to my motto: Live and let live, lol.

 

[James G 5]

Words cannot even begin to describe what I think of that plan. Well, maybe a few words like "sucks" and "horrible"... I don't really think that age should be a factor in how much you love someone. If you're 16 and in love with a 30 year old but are only allowed to date anyone up to age 18... that's just ridiculous. Like I said, the law will never be ultimately 'fair' unless each case was judged on individual merit. Even then it wouldn't be fair because no one else really has the right to judge someone else's relationship... Which brings me back to my motto: Live and let live, lol.

So you don't feel there's any societal interest in protecting people from their own poor judgment or the specter of predation when the consequences often cost the society as a whole? (IE in welfare, broken homes, abused kids, etc etc)

 

[MiloDRemix]

Not going to get into a huge debate over this, lol. I don't agree with the way our world is run and the selfish crooked people in charge of it just scare me. The problem I have with government and laws and restrictions is that they are never fair. They never will be. I accept that and just try to live as best I can without being judgmental of others.

 

[theplayer007]

Here in canada

If you are 18 years of age you can consent to all lawful sexual activity.

You can consent to sexual activity if you are 14 to 17 years of age as long as:

no relationship of trust, authority, or dependency exists;
there is no payment or offer of payment for sex;
there is no anal sex (unless you are in a legal, heterosexual marriage
with the other person).
Do not even think about having sex if you or your partner are under
14! The law prohibits touching or inviting, counselling or inciting a
person under 14 to touch, directly or indirectly, with a part of the
body or with an object, any part of the body for a sexual purpose. As
well, someone can be convicted of sexual assault of a person between
14 and under 18 if they are in a position of trust or authority or
dependency toward the person between 14 and 18 (even if the accused is
also under 18).

Now I bring this up cause this girl in my school who is 15 and have been dating a guy in his 20's, she's said they've only held hands and kissed, but whatever...

Now here's where it gets interesting, this guy is a black belt (she says hes just a black belt and not a qualified instructor) sometimes he helps teach a 15 minute warm up for the class, she's must know the law since she makes it clear he's not an instructor and just a black belt...

But does this still have the relationship of trust, authority, or dependency?

 

[marge_w]

Here in the UK the legal age of consent is 16, however you have to be 18 to get married without parental approval (go figure), was i sexually mature enough to start a relationship at that age?....yes. was i emotionally mature enough?.......yes.

If i had brought home someone 8 years older than me my parents would have been initially worried however given the chance to get to know the older man and also to see how the realationship was going, if i was happy and safe my parents would have given approval. Especially knowing what a bag of rampant hormones teenage boys are lol.

My parents knew me well enough to have faith in my judgement and strength of character that they knew I would not be co-erced or pressured into beginning a sexual relationship until I was ready, and they were right in that faith.

Questions have been put forward about whether ANY teenager can know what and who they want to spend the rest of their lives with and I believe you can, I knew at 16 that I didnt want to spend the rest of my life with my ex and I knew at 19 I did want to spend the rest of my life with my SO of almost 15 years.

Are we the same people we were 15 years ago, in some ways no, we have grown and been lucky to grow together however in some of the most fundamental ways yes we are the same people, our morals, values and the things we hold dear to our hearts have not changed.

Every person is different, every situation is different, however the law does not take this into consideration and maybe this is one of the situations where each case should be looked at on its own merits.

On the whole the law exists to protect people from harm and to punish those who have commited a crime, to me in this case, at face value, it seems like no hurt is being caused and as such no crime has been comitted...........unfortunately justice is blind

Marge

 

[Dom68005]

Many years ago, it used to make the wire services with some frequency when some guy would marry a very young lass in Tennessee. At the time, it was perfectly legal to marry a gal in her preteens. I have NOT kept up with the Tenneessee law changes if any since that era.

------------------
In many states, parental consent and/or consent of the young lady involved is NOT a valid defense against statutory rape.

=============
Furthermore, if bondage is involved, some states have laws the person being bound cannot consent to any sexual activity regardless of age. Thank God, it is not always enforced between consenting adults.