Should we have a Safe Sex contest?

[PennLady]

Joe and Sally are too busy on facebook or too wrapped up in their problems to tell junior to wrap it up or tell their daughter to make sure her boy friend wraps it up so now the schools, the government and apparently the porn industry should now teach them.

I. NEVER. SAID. THAT.

 

[PennLady]

Not directly, no. Sure did a dance around (and away from) it, though. And I can say that I was just stating my own opinion on the subject.

No, I didn't dance away from anything. I was also expressing an opinion, which was I think many parents still don't talk with their kids as openly about sex as perhaps they should, which then means the kids get their information on sex and related subjects from places they shouldn't, or that aren't helpful, or both. It was off-topic, no question.

Then I went on to say -- to agree with you! -- that I didn't think it was anyone's responsibility on this site to write safe sex stories. If you want to, fine; if not, fine.

I never said anyone "should" write safe sex stories, here or anywhere else.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Sort of shades of JBJ there, Stella. You have barely more than he does posted here (only two stories) and neither one of them do anything at all with safe sex. I guess the story is that you can't get in trouble on safe sex--and can pat yourself on your back about it--if you don't actually write and post stories.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=487603
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=376223
http://www.literotica.com/s/the-end-of-innocence-1

The rest of it is on my website. Or, I admit, in unfinished files on my harddrive. But it's around.

 

[sr71plt]

That's all fine. It's those "should" words that can get folks in trouble.

My only worry about other people's kids, though, concerned where they intersected with my own kids. My son wasn't a worry because, although girls draped themselves over him, there obviously was nothing working its way between his legs but a computer until he almost had his doctorate in hand. And my daughter was even more of a worry concerning when she was going to "join life." I think my wife and I did a little victory dance in the bedroom of my daughter's apartment when she was 25 and we first noticed a spent condom in her wastebasket.

 

[electric1]

What parents do or fail to do is irrelevant here.

If most erotica is rooted in the idea that unsafe sex is the only kind that's sexy, that encourages readers of all ages to be less safe. Can any informed person doubt that?

There was a time when most Americans thought wearing a seat belt was dorky. Then in the mid-80's someone started a campaign to have TV shows depict characters in cars wearing seat belts. A small change to the TV shows. But today are there any Americans left who think wearing a seat belt is dorky? After watching the coolest action heroes and hottest babes in badly written fantasies buckle up, Americans now accept the idea that you can wear a seat belt and still be cool.

Hell, when the Fonz got a library card, libraries across America were suddenly flooded with people of all ages requesting their first library card.

Whether any writer has a *responsibility* to include safe sex in their porn stories is another question entirely. But to deny that it can have an impact on people's real life attitudes and practices is just ignorant.

 

[sr71plt]

What parents do or fail to do is irrelevant here.

If most erotica is rooted in the idea that unsafe sex is the only kind that's sexy, that encourages readers of all ages to be less safe. Can any informed person doubt that?

There was a time when most Americans thought wearing a seat belt was dorky. Then in the mid-80's someone started a campaign to have TV shows depict characters in cars wearing seat belts. A small change to the TV shows. But today are there any Americans left who think wearing a seat belt is dorky? After watching the coolest action heroes and hottest babes in badly written fantasies buckle up, Americans now accept the idea that you can wear a seat belt and still be cool.

Hell, when the Fonz got a library card, libraries across America were suddenly flooded with people of all ages requesting their first library card.

Whether any writer has a *responsibility* to include safe sex in their porn stories is another question entirely. But to deny that it can have an impact on people's real life attitudes and practices is just ignorant.

All of that too is irrelevant to what separate folks find erotic. Which is why we have all kinds of stories here and why we don't need vigilantes here to try to guilt trip us and to piously tell us how we all should write.

This is an adult erotica/porn story site that is not open to underage readers and that has the privilege of putting the responsibility for the reading of any story by the adult members it accepts solidly on those adults' own shoulders.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

We have safe sex stories in all the contests. They are called non-erotic. Some have even won a contest or two.

I have safe-sex stories and I don't place them in non-erotic at all. Never have I ever considered safe-sex non-erotic.

 

[electric1]

uh ... how is holding a contest for hottest story with safe sex guilt tripping you?

We're not allowed to have a contest because it makes you feel guilty? What kind of politically correct bullshit are you trying to impose on us? All the rest of us have a responsibility to not show you up because it makes you feel bad? Is that what you're saying? Please tell me I've got that wrong.

 

[Stella_Omega]

uh ... how is holding a contest for hottest story with safe sex guilt tripping you?

We're not allowed to have a contest because it makes you feel guilty? What kind of politically correct bullshit are you trying to impose on us? All the rest of us have a responsibility to not show you up because it makes you feel bad? Is that what you're saying? Please tell me I've got that wrong.

He's a selective conversationalist.

 

[TxRad]

I have safe-sex stories and I don't place them in non-erotic at all. Never have I ever considered safe-sex non-erotic.

This must be the night everyone misunderstands everyone else.

I know people write safe sex stories. I have a few myself but I was pointing out that non-erotic was the ultimate in safe sex.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

This must be the night everyone misunderstands everyone else.

I know people write safe sex stories. I have a few myself but I was pointing out that non-erotic was the ultimate in safe sex.

Ah, gottcha. You'll live another day, Texan.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Condoms are easy to fit in a story, so that takes care of men, But what about safe Cunny?

Given the 'enthusiasm' with which pussy is eaten in most stories, how do you make that safe? Saran wrap?

That's what dental dams are for. Unfortunately they're a lot harder to find than condoms.

 

[sr71plt]

I've heard many authors here say it would be too challenging to make condom-use sexy, so they depict irresponsible behavior and expect the reader to remember it's just a fantasy.

Hey, you moved into this pious, accusatory, guilt-trip attempting territory on your very first post, electric1.

 

[sr71plt]

That's what dental dams are for. Unfortunately they're a lot harder to find than condoms.

Didn't read no safe-sex dental dams in Stella's cunt-lapping lesbian story (one of two stories total--the other one saying it was non-erotic) posted to Literotica--didn't see no safe-sex devices anywhere else in the story, either, for that matter.

(Pretty good story, though.)

 

[Stella_Omega]

That's what dental dams are for. Unfortunately they're a lot harder to find than condoms.

Pretty much a waste of time. There's simply no way to replicate the particular sensation and friction of a tongue through that shit.

So, hands. And toys.

Didn't read no safe-sex dental dams in Stella's cunt-lapping lesbian story (one of two stories total--the other one saying it was non-erotic) posted to Literotica--didn't see no safe-sex devices anywhere else in the story, either, for that matter.

(Pretty good story, though.)

True, when that one was written women weren't using dental dams.

And true there are two stories-- three actually, one with someone else's name added but mostly my work, you know how that goes.

And also true because there was no need for any other devices. Hosting a squid in your pussy? Redefines safety, as far as I can see.

(And thanks for the compliment.)

 

[Bramblethorn]

I know people write safe sex stories. I have a few myself but I was pointing out that non-erotic was the ultimate in safe sex.

I've seen a few authors write non-erotic sex. Patrick White springs to mind...

 

[sr71plt]

I've seen a few authors write non-erotic sex. Patrick White springs to mind...

Sounds either dull, brutal, or, worse, clinical. I think erotic non-sex is interesting to try to write.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Sounds either dull, brutal, or, worse, clinical. I think erotic non-sex is interesting to try to write.

Yeah, I found White unutterably dull, and not just because I had to read it for high school. I still don't know what the Nobel committee was thinking.

 

[NaokoSmith]

I really enjoy non-safe sex stories on here and other sites, I have no problem with seeing them, reading them and celebrating every 50th shade of their success. However I don't see why there shouldn't be a place for safe sex stories and why we shouldn't give them a bit of a bump to get people's creative juices flowing. Think of it less as a boring duty to sex education and more as an artistic challenge.

(Will you get that condom on, banana!)

Lovecraft, unfortunately many parents are even more ignorant about sex than their children, even if they aren't too embarrassed to have That Conversation. In another life, I do research in this field and when my colleague and I present at conferences, we often get intelligent professional well-connected people coming up not to ask about our research findings but to ask if there is any good place they can go as parents for advice to hand on to their kids (So far as I know, there isn't).

Pilot, I notice you were elated to find a used condom in your daughter's wastebin and I wonder if you'd have been quite so excited if it had been a used pregnancy tester kit or STD clinic voucher.

I think if teenagers are surreptitiously cruising the net for dirty stories that's probably better than them surreptitiously trying sex out with other ignorant teenagers - I mean over 18s only OF COURSE . I also know there are many adults who could do with a bit of a reminder to use some form of contraception. I hold my hand up here. I wouldn't have minded another baby in my long-established safe relationship but I got a bit more sensible after the second unpleasant and unplanned miscarriage.

PennLady - thank you for the congrats. I am a bit boggled myself that it's possible to make money from werewolves who have safe sex! especially when that story is available free all over the net. No accounting for the behaviours of those Kindle owners.

xxx

 

[3113]

Safe-Sex will be a hard sell on this site

Oh and PS, despairing of finding a werewolf story to review with safe sex in it, I finally wrote one. It has sold 60 copies on Amazon in the last 6 days (I find that a bit weird actually!), gone to 1200 plus downloads on Smashwords with three 5 star reviews and although it has strange ratings on this site, I have yet to get a comment complaining that the condom spoilt the story.
xxx

I'm very glad about your success with the story, but that it did well is kinda Apples and Oranges to this discussion. You did not, I imagine, advertise it as a safe-sex story did you? You advertised it as a erotic werewolf story. And those do very well. And kudos too that you had no complaints, but, again, I'm going to guess that your story had a sexy male werewolf and was probably as romantic as it was erotic? Those sell to women, and it's a lot less likely that women are going to object to the condom. In fact, most women are going to applaud it as it shows the guy is concerned about them.

But the suggestion here is to have a bunch of stories about safe sex. That means we'll be advertising the stories as "safe sex" stories. And most of the readers here are men--and your own thread on condoms shows how most men feel about them: Necessary--but would much rather do without. So I have to agree that male readers who come here for an erotic fantasy--for "I wish I could have sex with mom..." or "I wish I could be in a threesome..." or "I wish I could fuck that hot cheerleader I always see at the local football games..." Those fellas ain't going to want a condom to come between them and their fantasy sensations--which they're undoubtedly probably giving to themselves with one hand as they click through said stories with the other.

Most such readers come here with the view that the fictional female in the story isn't someone they need to care about. She isn't human (if she was, she probably wouldn't be having sex so easily and quickly with them), and she isn't going to give them a disease, and she isn't going to get preggers, so why ruin the fantasy fun with a condom?

Female readers can be the same, but the huge popularity of romances show that female readers don't mind stories where the lovers hold off (see "Twilight" and"Fifty Shades") and the sexual tension builds. Virgins are hugely popular heroines with women (now there's a trope I wish I could change!) and men who don't push or rush into sex but take their time loving and caring about the woman are hugely popular heroes. (Gosh, I wonder what the popularity of this fantasy says about the experiences most girls have with real boys in their formative years? ).

Women are usually fine with safe sex as they have to be concerned about it anyway. Not just disease wise but pregnancy-wise. They *always* have to be worried about that. So the werewolf putting on the condom isn't going to deter them from a good sexy romance, especially as it doesn't affect the sensations for the woman as it does for the men. But if you tried to sell that story to the men--and advertised that it was a "safe-sex" story, I don't think you would have sold nearly as many copies; and had your buyers been mostly or all heterosexual men, I doubt you would have avoided zero complaints either.

 

[3113]

As for the cunny...

Condoms are easy to fit in a story, so that takes care of men, But what about safe Cunny?

From here:

A female condom (also known as a femidom) is a device that is used during sexual intercourse as a barrier contraceptive and to reduce the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs—such as gonorrhea, syphilis, and HIV) and unintended pregnancy. Invented by Danish MD Lasse Hessel, it is worn internally by the female partner and provides a physical barrier to prevent exposure to ejaculated semen or other body fluids. Female condoms can be used by the receptive partner during anal sex.

The female condom is a thin, soft, loose-fitting sheath with a flexible ring at each end...The inner ring at the closed end of the sheath is used to insert the condom inside the vagina and to hold it in place during intercourse. The rolled outer ring at the open end of the sheath remains outside the vagina and covers part of the external genitalia.

http://www.peripheries.org/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/female_condom_hand.jpghttp://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41lEes8cULL._SY300_.jpg

 

[scouries]

http://courtneyrosecs.com/wp-content/uploads/istock_snobsm.jpg
Is as good a contest idea as any other, especially for short-term use. A basic problem with the current contests might be that they are permanent themes.

Exactly! As I have often campaigned for in the past we should bring in at least three new themes every year. And every theme should be given at least one rest every three years.

And the theme guidelines should be tightened and then enforced. Summer? Winter?

One only has to read a couple of pages of the current tiger girl V-Day support thread to see how many recycled and old story ideas our poor readers are going to be exposed to this year. I think at least 15 regulars have already promised to dust off tales from the past…

Safe sex? Sure, try it if you like. A specific category contest? Go ahead. April Fools contest? Why not? Back to school contest? Give it a go. There are hundreds of possibilities - lets try some. ​

 

[sr71plt]

Pilot, I notice you were elated to find a used condom in your daughter's wastebin and I wonder if you'd have been quite so excited if it had been a used pregnancy tester kit or STD clinic voucher.

I don't get what your point is. It was both a sign of safe sex and that she actually was getting laid--which, at 25, ranks as "it's high time to be doing." What irrelevant tangent are you off on with this?

 

[lovecraft68]

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=487603
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=376223
http://www.literotica.com/s/the-end-of-innocence-1

The rest of it is on my website. Or, I admit, in unfinished files on my harddrive. But it's around.

Don't even dignify him with an answer, all the crap he posts here has been previously released in poor selling anthologies, so he puts them here to make himself look prolific.

 

[NaokoSmith]

I'm very glad about your success with the story, but that it did well is kinda Apples and Oranges to this discussion. You did not, I imagine, advertise it as a safe-sex story did you?

The point I'm trying to make is that although mine was a safe sex story in one of the most unlikely categories for safe sex nobody was bothered by a condom being popped on in it. It wasn't as difficult as I thought to make it part of the story and readers (male and female have favourited it) accepted it without comment.

Later you go on to say women readers will accept condoms but men won't. I think this is exactly why we need more good erotica with safe sex in them. I live in an area with very high teenage pregnancy rates, where women are expected to take responsibility for contraception (as well as be virgins! another good point you make reference to).

Without thinking that a pretty story can solve the world's problems, I hope that having a good range of writing that assumes condoms are normal for casual sexual encounters might influence those young people who are reading around. It's worth a go. Then we can have a bit more hope that our daughters' boyfriends will be as sensible as Pilot's, and not say: "Ugh, no, I can't do it with a condom, you don't love me if you're not willing to let me screw you bareback."

I don't feel too sorry for men losing a bit of sensation in order to ensure women are protected from STDs as well as falling pregnant when they weren't planning to. As someone remarked on another thread I posted on this topic, they're getting laid aren't they? And they've got lots and lots and lots of stories about daddy screwing his step-daughter bareback. I'm really surprised they don't say, "Sure, go to it! It would be great if my actual daughter had some enjoyable fiction about a man who might care enough to protect her to fantasise to, since I don't want to let her out the house because the world is full of men who just want 100% satisfaction out of her and think putting on a condom is somehow unmanly".

Don't worry, Lovecraft! I know Pilot's style. He says some good things sometimes but he likes to lure you in and have a big row that isn't necessarily relevant to the thread. I know, I shouldn't have thrown him the bone but I couldn't resist.