Serious Questions About Pleasing Women

[crazyman]

Ok, a while back there was big post on how to orally please women. If anyone knows where I can find it, please reply to this message.
Also, I am looking for advice on the best ways to please my g/f with my fingers. Perhaps there is some long "how to..." section for that as well. Women, please let me know what you do and do not like.

Thanks

 

[Whispersecret]

Hmmm, why do I get the feeling like you're under eighteen???

Like I just suggested in another thread, try searching this area of the bulletin board. Lots of great advice. I don't think there's really any better way to learn than to try stuff and ask her if she likes it. <shrugs> Every woman is different.

 

[Bonnie Wee Lassie]

I have that feeling too!

 

[crazyman]

Sorry to burst your bubbles, but I'm 20 (Not that 20 is much better than 18 in your opinions). I have fingered and gone down on a few other girls, but this girl isn't very vocal, in fact, she's damn near silent. I just decided that I'd look for a few ways to improve in case I lost what little skill I had.

 

[Whispersecret]

Sorry, crazyman, it's just that I figured anyone who was looking to please a girl with his fingers wasn't able to go for the whole enchilada -- intercourse. The most obvious reason for this was youth and/or inexperience of either or both parties. No offense. Twenty is a perfectly acceptable age.

Well, you'll know she's getting turned on if she gets really wet. I don't say this sarcastically!

Some advice from me. I have never been fond of fingers around my clit, which is a highly sensitve area on me. Fingers can be rough (hangnails, fingernails, etc.) If you're going to put your hand down there, be VERY VERY VERY GENTLE, like you're touching a baby chick or something similarly fragile. In fact, don't touch it all all at first. Touch all around it for a little while. (Watch Monty Python's THe Meaning of Life. There's a funny skit in there about going directly for the clit.)

I find that the more excited I get, the more pressure you can put on my clit. But if you put too much, BAM, I get spooked and tense, unable to relax because I think you're going to bash it again. Then you have to start over.

I once posted a lengthy piece about what I like in oral sex. If you want it, email me.

All of this is applicable perhaps only to me. Your girlfriend may like something completely different!

 

[CreamyLady]

WhatWhispersecret said . . .

Also, you might try telling her, when you aren't too excited, that you would like to know what pleases her. Communication works wonders!

 

[Wizard]

I agree with the Girls , Talk with her some girls like it gentle others like it a little rougher...or harder...you must ask your girl what makes her feel good.......save yourself some time and mistakes and just ask...talk with her...tell her what you like too....

 

[crazyman]

Thanks for the advice everyone. I always forget that whole "communication" thing.

 

[sallygirl]

I'm on the other side of this problem - I'm a woman who doesn't make many sounds during sex. My current lover tries hard to get me to talk to him and tell him what I like and for some reason I find that very difficult. He tries to get me talking during sex (I think it's a big turn-on for him) and I usually give only one-word answers. I simply can't find the words, though I'm fairly eloquent in other areas. I don't like to talk about sex, I like to DO IT! Some might say that's immaturity. I don't know.

 

[Treat]

All though verbal responses are a turn on for the majority of the human race during sex, it in my opinion isn't something that is required, or needed. There are times when I am with my baby (meaning lady, my fiance', my girl.. for you really perved ones ) that I may be vocal, or not and she visa versa. It all depends really on the intensity of the time and the situation. Just because one doesn't say anything, doesn't mean they are not enjoying what is going on. More can be said and conveyed through body language and actions of the body than words could ever describe.

Crazyman if you want to really read on something as you said, then goto the following site. Scroll down to where you see sexual positions, and also oral sex.

http://www.pleasure-zone.com

But let me tell you, that the best way to learn wht to do and want not to do is to follow the following two guidelines if you want to call it.

#1 Trial and Error - Try it, if it works remember it and do it again. If not then leave it alone or talk about it.

#2 Listen With Your Body Not Your Ears - A woman will guide you and tell you in one way or another if what you are doing is comfortable or not. Her body language will tell you all you need to know. Just listen to that, and not worry so much as to 'Am I good" or 'Am I the best you had' and thoughts like that going through your mind. I was the same way, and after I opened myself up and started to listen, things became more clearer. If there is ever a question about something, my fiance' and I will talk about it or discuss it. Though during sex talking about things may be the last thing on your mind, a lot can be resolved and discovered at the same time.

 

[Skibum]

Thanks for the advice everyone. I always forget that whole "communication" thing.

Hell, crazyman, I've been married for 21 years and I still forget it, too!

 

[Whispersecret]

sallygirl, try this...When he does something you like:

--moan or make some other verbal response that doesn't require actual words.
--have your hands on him somewhere and grip him or hug him more tightly when he does something you like.
--pant on purpose.
--shiver on purpose.

When you're not having sex, tell him it's hard for you to say things outloud. Or, you could write him a note. I know that sounds dumb, but a couple of times I've told my husband something important to me that I couldn't say to his face in a letter, and it worked very well.

 

[dancinvixen]

The best way to please a woman?? Try listening to your woman. Find out what noises she makes when she is excited, what turns her on or off, what makes her "cream". <g> Basically, don't ask us, ask her.

 

[Skitten]

Open up to her, see what she may like what she may be into. Ask her what her fantasies are and how and what she may want to try.

 

[sweetcyanide]

sallygirl

You know sallygirl, I have the same problem as you.

I just can't seem to find words at the moment...what I found helped me though, was something that my b/f did.

Since he knew that I didn't like to talk alot, and tell him what I wanted....he'd get me started, get me going...and then stop....pinning me there until I was FORCED to tell him exactly what I wanted him to do.

It turned out to be a major turn on for both of us.
And we both learned a little something new from it.

Just thought I'd share that little experience

 

[Skibum]

crazyman, try this link for answers to your questions:

http://very-koi.net/projects.htm

 

[honeylove]

serious advice for a serious Q

I don't know if I am "too late" with this reply, but I can tell you what I like.......something I do for myself, and have taught my man to do for me as well. I call it "the butterfly" (no----I am not bringing out an illustrated instruction book.....lol) You start with one finger....put it at the opening & gently tease a little. Some nipple sucking etc is a hot thing to do at the same time. Work in two fingers.....and tease. The pussy is most sensitive in the first inch or two, so this is where you will do the most "pleasing". When your lady is hot & horny, slide the fingers in about halfway, and then flicker them rapidly, and quite firmly, up and down (NOT in and out). It is a fickering....."butterfly wing" movement, and it is totally orgasmic!!!

 

[SeXy ReDHeD]

Everything they said and a couple minor suggestions.

1) Make sure the woman is somewhat wet before putting a hand there, either on the clit or in the vagina. It is one of the most painful things imaginable when a guy gets too hasty and goes for it right away.

2) If you've made it that far (or especially if you haven't), PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make sure your fingernails are cut short. The reasons are pretty straightforward I think.

 

[libra-2]

How to please your girlfriend with your fingers?

Put your hand in your pocket, pull out your wallet (billfold) and give her all the money in it. That should please her a lot.