Rules for How Men Think--Please Add Your Own

[Bachlum Chaam]

1. I am the man in this house and if I want to go out with the guys I will and there's nothing.... Now don't you start that pouting bit. It doesn't work. I am man and I'm stron....... No, no, no, don't start crying. You know that won't work. I'm to cleve..... Oh God, not the lip quiver. How dumb do you think I am to fall for that one aga...... Awwww not that shattered, hurt puppy dog look. You know that's not fair to use that one. Come on now, it's not that bad. It's just one night. Only a couple of hours and I'll be bac.... Oh please hun, don't cry like that. Come on now. Look, I'm calling the guys now. Please don't do that. I'll tell them maybe tomorrow night. Come here hun. Let me hold you. It'll be ok. I promise. Shhhh...

My lady Kiki I wouldn,t have dreamed of leaving you anyway,no need to pout and lip atrembling,you,d have been glad for me to go,hope you are well
Greetings Bachlum Chaam

 

[starkpic]

um Starkie..That sucks that you think I'm sulking...I don't sulk..I pout...and when I pout, my bottom quivers...

Sulking, pouting, quivering buttocks.....all the same to me, MsFeisty, either means you need spanking or riding. As a special consideration to your needs, i will, however, pull on your red mane.

 

[starkpic]

My lady Kiki I wouldn,t have dreamed of leaving you anyway,no need to pout and lip atrembling,you,d have been glad for me to go,hope you are well
Greetings Bachlum Chaam

Ha...hahahaha...har..har!
(sticks out foot in effort to trip Bachrub and spoil his entrance)

 

[Feistyred16]

Sulking, pouting, quivering buttocks.....all the same to me, MsFeisty, either means you need spanking or riding. As a special consideration to your needs, i will, however, pull on your red mane.

Oh darlin..I think I may need both!

 

[Feistyred16]

Hey, Spenser -

well, my ex & I weren't married, just dated for almost 5 years... It was a good reminder of why I don't miss him. Not into returning the favor in any sort of way - good thing for him I like to give more than receive.

And sometimes, breaking someone's dry spell is a good way to get them motivated to get out there & ask somebody out, or act on that crush. It's worked before, and I would like to see him get into seeing someone.

Feisty, better watch that bottom lip before I decide it needs to be kissed.

Now you know...that wouldn't bother me one bit...kiss away...and I'm sure we'd get no complaints from anyone here... Would we people?

 

[RomanHans]

Now you know...that wouldn't bother me one bit...kiss away...and I'm sure we'd get no complaints from anyone here... Would we people?

Ummm, in case it's not clear from the fact that I'm a man and therefore bound by the rules outlined in this thread...HELL NO!!

Roman

 

[kikmosa]

My lady Kiki I wouldn,t have dreamed of leaving you anyway,no need to pout and lip atrembling,you,d have been glad for me to go,hope you are well
Greetings Bachlum Chaam

Never would I have been glad to see you go. I fair well though I do admit to a bit of hurt. However, the hurt seems far away as a barrier of loratab stands between it and myself. In other words, I'm about half stoned on painkillers and not feeling much. I've survived yet another visit to the dentist's torture chamber with but one to go. Happy indeed will I be on that date.
Kiki

 

[kikmosa]

Ha...hahahaha...har..har!
(sticks out foot in effort to trip Bachrub and spoil his entrance)

Now Starkpic, I thought we were friends. Why would you try to harm or stop another of my friends? Was I wrong in thinking you were my friend? That would hurt indeed.

 

[starkpic]

Now Starkpic, I thought we were friends. Why would you try to harm or stop another of my friends? Was I wrong in thinking you were my friend? That would hurt indeed.

Ooooooohhh! No indeed, Mi'lady
'Twas merely a gentle joust betwixt mi' old, (and I mean OLD), countryman friend and myself. In England, Mi'lady, 'tis a well known mark of respect to trip up one's colleague whilst they try to make a worthy speech.
(Kneels to kiss mi'lady's feet .... )

 

[starkpic]

Never would I have been glad to see you go. I fair well though I do admit to a bit of hurt. However, the hurt seems far away as a barrier of loratab stands between it and myself. In other words, I'm about half stoned on painkillers and not feeling much. I've survived yet another visit to the dentist's torture chamber with but one to go. Happy indeed will I be on that date.
Kiki

Sorry about your toothache, Kiki, I hope it is resolved soon for you

 

[kikmosa]

Ooooooohhh! No indeed, Mi'lady
'Twas merely a gentle joust betwixt mi' old, (and I mean OLD), countryman friend and myself. In England, Mi'lady, 'tis a well known mark of respect to trip up one's colleague whilst they try to make a worthy speech.
(Kneels to kiss mi'lady's feet .... )

It makes me happy indeed to know that thou and I have betweenst us a friendship. For I treasure my friends above all else. Indeed friends make life worth enduring.

 

[starkpic]

It makes me happy indeed to know that thou and I have betweenst us a friendship. For I treasure my friends above all else. Indeed friends make life worth enduring.

Madame, dear lady Kiki, I am so close to Weirdsville myself, perhaps, some time, I might call and we could share own interests and life experiences.
Your true and trusty friend,

Starkpic Plantaganet

 

[Bachlum Chaam]

It makes me happy indeed to know that thou and I have betweenst us a friendship. For I treasure my friends above all else. Indeed friends make life worth enduring.

My lady Kiki thou must understand that the venerable OLD Stark my countryman is afraid of we young and rutting stags usurping his old and wrinkled sac in the matters of boffing and tupping.
It just shows he,ll do anything to injure a rivals prong to ensure he keeps all the comely wenches for himself.Hope you feel better my lady.
Ruttingly Bachlum Chaam

 

[kikmosa]

Sorry about your toothache, Kiki, I hope it is resolved soon for you

It will be resolved Monday when the last 5 are extracted. I simply keep reminding myself that there will be no more toothaches to deal with and once i have my dentures, I'll be able to smile for the first time in years.

 

[kikmosa]

Gentlemen, indeed both of you are my friend. Of equal value to me. I thank you for your offer Starkpic. At this time, I do ot feel that i'm ready to go further then a friendship here online. Bachlum knows why this is so as he has read my story. If you wish to know also then click on the link in my sig line that say "How do you help....." and you will understand. However, simply having the friendship of two such fine gentlemen lightens my heart considerably. I'm truly honered. A for you both.

 

[Bachlum Chaam]

Gentlemen, indeed both of you are my friend. Of equal value to me. I thank you for your offer Starkpic. At this time, I do ot feel that i'm ready to go further then a friendship here online. Bachlum knows why this is so as he has read my story. If you wish to know also then click on the link in my sig line that say "How do you help....." and you will understand. However, simply having the friendship of two such fine gentlemen lightens my heart considerably. I'm truly honered. A for you both.

Ah my lady you tease these two knights from England and never more perfect your smile that the one you have now thinking of the wrinkled old Storkpik.
your servant Bachlum Chaam

 

[RomanHans]

Ummm, not to be petty, but does SOMEONE have something to say about male behavior?

Roman

 

[kikmosa]

Ummm, not to be petty, but does SOMEONE have something to say about male behavior?

Roman

I deeply apologize for the hijacking of your thread sir. Will not happen again. Goodbye.

 

[English Lady]

geting back to the men's behaviour thing here are a few reasons whjy its good to be a man...


Movie nudity is virtually always female

.A five day vacation requires only one suitcase

Belching is cool

Your bathroom lines are always 80% shorter

Old friends don't give a crap if you've lost or gained weight

Screw up the laundry once, never allowed to do it again

Your ass is never a factor in a job interview

All your orgasms are real

You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you go

You can go to the bathroom without a support group

You can understand Homer Simpson

You never get a stupid Love Quiz in GQ

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness

You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes

 

[RomanHans]

geting back to the men's behaviour thing here are a few reasons whjy its good to be a man...

All your orgasms are real

Says who?

Roman

 

[SuperShyGuy]

Other advantages:

Grey hair on a man looks "distinguished"

You can write your name in the snow (useless but fun)

No shaving your legs

No one looks at you funny if you eat the WHOLE pizza

Admitting to masturbating isn't taboo (not that that nonesense flies on Lit anyway)

No buying pantyhose, that shit is expensive in the long term!

 

[English Lady]

Roman.....good point *L*


SSG all good ones...and your right about bloody pantyhose...horrid expensive things...ick...

 

[RomanHans]

Another 'rule'

1. It is always more important to wash the car than to wash the dishes. You can eat without dishes or utensils, but if you don't take care of your car, you can't look cool while driving!

Roman

 

[RomanHans]

And a corollary

1. Any inadequacy in penis size can always be compensated with the purchase of a louder stereo or more expensive automobile.

Roman

 

[bobsgirl]

The man of this house firmly believes in his ability to be right and error free 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Kind of like the two rules of motherhood: 1. Mom is always right. 2. In the unlikely event that Mom is wrong, refer to rule #1.


Computer doesn't work for him: Stupid piece of shit computer!

Computer doesn't work for me: Alright, what did you do to it THIS time??