Respond with Monty Python

One of my favourite skits:Travel Agent

Mr. Bounder: Ah. Hello, I'm Bounder of Adventure.
Mr. Smoketoomuch: Oh, hello. My name is Smoketoomuch.
Mr. Bounder: What?
Mr. Smoketoomuch: My name is Smoketoomuch. Mr. Smoketoomuch.
Mr. Bounder: Well, you'd better cut down a little then.
Mr. Smoketoomuch: I'm sorry?
Mr. Bounder: You'd better cut down a little then.
Mr. Smoketoomuch: Oh, I see! Smoke too much so I'd better cut down a little then!
Mr. Bounder: Yes. Ooh, it's going to get people making jokes about your name all the time, eh?
Mr. Smoketoomuch: No, actually, it never struck me before. Smoketoomuch...
 
And then there was the man who couldn't say the letter C, replacing it with a B.

You mean Cat?

Yes, that's right, Bat

... What a silly bunt!
 
especially appropriate for lit


Zoot/Dingo: And after the spanking, the oral sex!
Sir Galahad: Well, I suppose I could stay a bit longer.
 
And so the final result:

The Upperclass Twit of the Year - Gervaise Brook-Hampster
Runner up - Vivian Smith-Smythe-Smith
Third - Nigel Incubator-Jones

Well there'll certainly be some car door slamming in the streets of Kensington tonight.
 
Now, you listen here! He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
 
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries (Holy Grail)
 
Well last week, we showed you how to become a gynaecologist. And this week on "How to Do It" we're going to show you how to play the flute, how to split an atom, how to construct a box girder bridge, how to irrigate the Sahara Desert and make vast new areas of land cultivatable, but first, here's Jackie to tell you all how to rid the world of all known diseases.
 
what also floats in water?

Bread!

Apples!

Uh, very small rocks!

Lead!

Churches!

....a duck.
 
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