Remote Control

[WriterDom]

It can be interesting cyber foreplay. Once I had a sub shave her pussy and mail me the hair in a small plastic bag. I find myself drawn to more real flesh to flesh now.

I've seen it taken to the extreme. Requiring the sub to suck off two stranger's cocks in one evening. If that's what floats your boat, it's fine with me. But not my bag.

 

[Cirrus]

Presumably there are things you would do and enjoy doing while outside your D's immediate presence...they needn't be in public or involve third parties; those were examples.

Do I take it that the examples didn't work for you...or that for you all D/s must be face to face?

Lance

I prefer my D/s face to face, but I don't like to rule anything out, either. If my Dom were to request an item of clothing that I was to wear in his abscence or to have on on demand, to masturbate (and how or with what) or not, I would probably do it.

I also want to comment on making up stories of what you've done. Even if you didn't do the activity, what's the harm in spinning a yarn? No one gets hurt, and while I suppose it could TECHNICALLY be considered a breach of trust, it's pretty harmless. And if a little fiction now and then, even if one doesn't know it's fiction, spices things up between partners, what's the harm?

 

[Rubyfruit]

... what's the harm?

It's lying.

Lying is not a good thing to do if you want a truly intimate relationship.

 

[Freya]

It's lying.

Lying is not a good thing to do if you want a truly intimate relationship.

Exactly. Why not just say "You know, masturbating with my gear shift is just not something I'm comfortable doing", and discuss other options or ideas? People talk about trust being so important, even more so in this type of relationship - but you'd risk the loss of trust that easily by lying about something like this?

 

[zipman]

I chime in to agree with Zip and Lance. If you take the time to actually think up an assignment and write it down, and she just makes something up, that would be a disappointment to me. To me, that's like faking an orgasm... why bother? That would very quickly disintegrate the trust of the relationship. I'd rather she just hand the assignment back to me and say "No thank you".

<snip>
I think some of you might have missed the point of these assignments. They are meant to be *enjoyable*. And at the same time, show that the submissive is thinking about their Dom/me when they are away, plus is willing to follow their direction when the Dom/me is not there and has no way of knowing if the submissive has followed the directions. It's kinda like the "honor" system. Sure you can cheat and lie, but will you feel better for it or worse?

<Snip>
Anyhoo... looks like some people "get it" and some don't. No biggie

PBW

Dang, PBW is on tonight! I think your points above are all excellent.

I see three reasons for giving out assignments.

1) To assert dominance over a sub when not together

This may be as simple as just "keeping the dominance fresh" or it may be a part of the subs' training. As a Dom, I often give instructions that I know will benefit the sub's growth. I expect my orders to be followed to the letter whether I am there or not. I would view lying about actually doing them as a betrayal of trust.

2) To allow the sub to feel the pleasure of submitting based on the "honor" system.

A sub that actually does the assignment should be filled with the enjoyment of submitting and obedience. Because it is based on honor, it can be even stronger than in person. I have had subs thank me after the first time we did this as they were so pleased to have had the chance to submit in a new way. If they don't feel that way, what are they looking for in the relationship if it isn't submission.

3) The mutual enjoyment of what is done.

This can be a lot of fun, and very erotic. I use this as a prelude to a scene and I have found subs to be in a high state of arousal after doing it.

The example WriterDom used above was extreme, but there are plenty of others such as:
- Masturbating discreetly in public (point taken Eb)
- Wearing sexy underwear in public
- Wearing a butt plug to run errands or at a meal
- Pinching their nipples at hour intervals during the day so they are hard and sensitive by the evening

But they have to obey - that's what makes it fun!

 

[lovetoread]

But they have to obey - that's what makes it fun!

For some reason this line made me smile.

I think lying about doing it is wrong.

Why bother?

Too much trouble trying to come up with the details to send out instead of what really happened.

But then again, what do I know?

 

[Lancecastor]

I suppose it could TECHNICALLY be considered a breach of trust

Bing!

 

[zipman]

One thing I am dying to try is to buy one of those remote controlled eggs (cordless, of course), instruct my sub to put it in and go to a busy bar. Then I would stand nearby in disguise and turn it on and off and watch the look on her face. I think making her keep her composure as it goes off would be a real turn-on.

As PBW said, making up the assignments can be a lot of work, but it can also be a lot of fun.

 

[Rubyfruit]

- Masturbating discreetly in public (point taken Eb)
- Wearing sexy underwear in public
- Wearing a butt plug to run errands or at a meal
- Pinching their nipples at hour intervals during the day so they are hard and sensitive by the evening

But they have to obey - that's what makes it fun!

I think this is my new favorite thread.

 

[WriterDom]

One thing I am dying to try is to buy one of those remote controlled eggs (cordless, of course), instruct my sub to put it in and go to a busy bar. Then I would stand nearby in disguise and turn it on and off and watch the look on her face. I think making her keep her composure as it goes off would be a real turn-on.

As PBW said, making up the assignments can be a lot of work, but it can also be a lot of fun.

That opens up a lot of possibilities. I don't have the egg, but I do have a 4" cordless vibrator. It would certainly get her attention in a nilla environment

 

[Freya]

One thing I am dying to try is to buy one of those remote controlled eggs (cordless, of course), instruct my sub to put it in and go to a busy bar. Then I would stand nearby in disguise and turn it on and off and watch the look on her face. I think making her keep her composure as it goes off would be a real turn-on.

As PBW said, making up the assignments can be a lot of work, but it can also be a lot of fun.

You're so evil. I've been dying to have someone do that exact thing to me.

 

[zipman]

You're so evil. I've been dying to have someone do that exact thing to me.

Yes, evil and imaginative. And like WriterDom, the thought of it going on over a romantic dinner for two, or while she's getting her nails done and has to stay still makes for a very entertaining evening of planning.

Of course I do all of my planning in my "Secret Mountain Lair." On a side note, I can be a most convincing Dr. Evil.

 

[Freya]

Yes, evil and imaginative. And like WriterDom, the thought of it going on over a romantic dinner for two, or while she's getting her nails done and has to stay still makes for a very entertaining evening of planning.

Of course I do all of my planning in my "Secret Mountain Lair." On a side note, I can be a most convincing Dr. Evil.

I have a best friend whose mind is as warped and kinky as my own, and we've had some interesting discussions on those cordless doodads, and the fun that could be had with a suitable man in control of it.

 

[lovetoread]

That opens up a lot of possibilities. I don't have the egg, but I do have a 4" cordless vibrator. It would certainly get her attention in a nilla environment

It would get her attention no matter what the enviroment, I would think.

 

[zipman]

I have a best friend whose mind is as warped and kinky as my own, and we've had some interesting discussions on those cordless doodads, and the fun that could be had with a suitable man in control of it.

Sounds like you and your friend could be quite the handful

I think the key is the location, the situation and the cruelty of the man to push the limits of the scene.

 

[Freya]

Sounds like you and your friend could be quite the handful

I think the key is the location, the situation and the cruelty of the man to push the limits of the scene.

Oh, I think we could be. We've often said that it's a good thing we aren't bi or into 3 somes, because it'd take a hell of a man to conquer us together.

Some of the scenarios we've discussed about the remote comtrols toys have been wicked, but it does really need the perfect amount of cruelty in a man to do it up right.

 

[TantaLiza]

my 2 cents worth...

In the past, I was involved in several "assignments"....because I wanted to obey and please, I followed them to the letter... it was also fun for me! He never asked more than I could do nor did He push me past a limit I had set... He wanted me to have pleasure giving pleasure....I felt no need to lie....He trusted me to follow instructions and I obeyed...

I have done it before and will do it again when/if asked....

Liza

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: my 2 cents worth...

... it was also fun for me!

Would you care to give an example of an assignment you enjoyed, Liza?

Lance

 

[Lancecastor]

I think this is my new favorite thread.

You said earlier you've not done this before but would be interested...have you thought about it this evening and if so, what sorts of assignments have crossed your mind ?

Lance

 

[TantaLiza]

Re: Re: my 2 cents worth...

Would you care to give an example of an assignment you enjoyed, Liza?

Lance

Let's see... one of my assignments was to masterbate everyday on my break at work.... just to the edge of orgasm.... at least 4 times.... using only one finger... without penetration... was not allowed to cum til the end of the week and only after I asked please in all earnestness....

Another was to gradually get myself used to anal penetration... beginning with one finger and up to 3.... then graduate to vib/dildo... this was to take place daily yet refrain from cumming til I couldn't hold out....

I was also instructed to not wear underwear... I did this and now have a hard time wearing any at all anymore... even my thongs!

All these things were to be reported daily in an email directly to Him and I was to confess if I didn't follow it to the letter... He, in turn, would derive some sort of "punishment" which I would deserve for disobedience... He was very imaginative!

Hope this is what you were looking for...

Liza

 

[Ishmael]

I've found over the years that I really giving enjoy remote control assignments with instructions to be carried out and reports to be filed afterwards.

The assignments can cover a range of kinks or be used to explore fresh earth...specific guided masturbation, public self touching or exposure, stroking a stranger's cock in a crowded elevator...the possibilities are almost limitless.

Do you? Don't you? Want to?

Curiously

Lance

"over the years" ?

Puppy.

Ishmael

 

[lovetoread]

Re: Re: Remote Control

"over the years" ?

Puppy.

Ishmael

Cute

 

[Oscuridad]

One thing I am dying to try is to buy one of those remote controlled eggs (cordless, of course), instruct my sub to put it in and go to a busy bar. Then I would stand nearby in disguise and turn it on and off and watch the look on her face. I think making her keep her composure as it goes off would be a real turn-on.

As PBW said, making up the assignments can be a lot of work, but it can also be a lot of fun.

And here I thought I was being all original with that same thought

This is an excellent thread.

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Remote Control

"over the years" ?

Puppy.

Ishmael

Arf..."decades" would have perhaps been inaccurate, and "eons" too godlike, even for me.

"I've been a Dom for several hours now...kneel and bark like a fishy, kajira!"

Good to see you post over here from time to time, Ish.

Lance

 

[Butter_cup]

I'm new here but I've been reading quite a bit of the threads and this one caught my eye as my Dom and I share in remote control all the time.

I admit with the very first assignment I hesitated wondering if I could do this. Then I pictured him there with me. The desire he harbors for me evident in every breath he takes. The beat of his heart calling out to me quickening my pulse. My hands becoming his. My body there to be worshipped and pleasured. Why the hell wouldn't I want to do this? Knowing full well when I had completed it, not only would I be spent from a wild orgasm but also HE would have been a part of it all.

What is the point in faking an assignment? Why bother doing it in the first place? You obviously have little to no rapport with your Dom if you can't be honest enough to share any concerns or impediments you may have when it comes to carrying out what you've been asked so lovingly and thoughtfully to do.

Getting a note from my love at any point during my day sends a thrill of excitement through me. Will this one contain a request for me to pleasure myself to the point of orgasm then stopping removing my hands and begging my lover to fuck me, to thrust his cock deep inside my throbbing pussy or something equally sensual and erotic created for me by HIM to experience together though miles separate us?

He experiences this through my retelling and my later reactions to him. Each time we come together my response to his attentions increases in intensity. If I were to fake or be dishonest with him, eventually it would be shown.

To have agreed to do the assignment, I agree with Zipman, I better do it. The compromise has already been worked out in the agreement. I would never feel like "rebelling" as someone noted. Why rebel when this is what I want just as much as he does? It is a combined effort all around.

I could go on but I think I'll watch for a few more responses. This is a very interesting topic. And in answer to your original questions Lance...

Do you? yes. Don't you? oh yes. Want to? May I please?