Polar Vortex vs Solar Vortex

[dolf]

I could bear you wearing them if I had the memory of chundering in them to comfort me.

 

[JohnnySavage]

Free Slupree day; and who doesn't love a free slurpee?

 

[dolf]

me. yuck!

 

[JohnnySavage]

Rory McIlroy hit a 436-yard drive on Thursday at the Scottish Open


That's twice as far as I can hit it.

Of course, I like to get my money's worth and take as many shots as possible. What fun is golf if you only get to take 70 shots?

 

[JohnnySavage]

I really hate doing the quarterly taxes. I always say I'm going to keep better records so it's not so much work, but I never do.

 

[JohnnySavage]

The neighbors seem to be moving out. Good... they had a passel of noisy kids.

I hope 8-10 beautiful young strippers buy the place and invite me over for pool parties.

 

[JohnnySavage]

Here's what's on my mind today:

I have Comcast with the whole shebang of TV channels. It's about $200 per month, which drives me nuts (I may have posted about this before).

All morning I've been researching how to cut the cable. It seems that getting a Roku thingy and a digital TV antenna is the right way to go.

But the problem is that I get set in my ways and I have one remote that does everything, and all the wires are inside the walls. Change is hard. I'd need a new remote... possibly as many as three... wires will run wild... and I may find that the one show I enjoy watching isn't available.

This is another reason I need to take a wife.

An accountant wife and one that knows about technology.

I wanna sit down and enjoy watching a little tv without having to figure stuff out.

 

[JohnnySavage]

I'm getting bike shorts. Not because I've been watching the Tour de France, but because I expect they will make my package look huge.

 

[Fata Morgana]

I'm getting bike shorts. Not because I've been watching the Tour de France, but because I expect they will make my package look huge.

Your future wife approves.

 

[phantom4533]

I'm getting bike shorts. Not because I've been watching the Tour de France, but because I expect they will make my package look huge.

They might also make you look like you're wearing adult diapers.

 

[thør]

Destined for Johnny's grill?

 

[JohnnySavage]

When I die, I don't think anyone at lit would have a way of knowing.

And if I died at home, it would be months before anyone knew. Probably when the house was sold for non-payment of taxes.

 

[JohnnySavage]

I broke my own #1 rule of technology and let windows update its self.


Now my speakers won't work.

Never... EVER update stuff. If your shit is working, don't mess with it

 

[JohnnySavage]

I dozed off for a few minutes and it was 0-0. I wake up and it's 3-0. I'm thinking, how long have I been asleep? But it was still the first inning.

 

[cjh]

Johnny dates women who remind him of his yard man?

Who knew?

 

[JohnnySavage]

We had a doozy of a storm last night. My kayak was over in the neighbor's yard this morning.

 

[trysail]

I could bear you wearing them if I had the memory of chundering in them to comfort me.

chundering
Britspeak for tossing cookies, blowing lunch, technicolor yawn, vomiting, driving the porcelain bus, etc.


​

 

[dolf]

we have the bestest words.

 

[unregistered]

 

[thør]

This thread is up shit creek without a paddle.

Johnny can paddle that kayak with his hands.

 

[JohnnySavage]

http://cache1.asset-cache.net/gc/142019854-monkey-sitting-on-kayak-in-water-gettyimages.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=wRe2%2BG7y%2BiG49DvbWbLnfgi9rhZJ2qWvSfoARkKQW20%3D

 

[unregistered]

 

[JohnnySavage]

Who doesn't love a monkey?

 

[JohnnySavage]

I cut the cable!

No more Skinemax titties for Johnny.

 

[unregistered]