Physical Attractions Importance

[unusuallyconfused]

I am in total accord that beauty is only skin deep and true beauty lies with the inner person. However, can you be attracted to someone without physical attraction? I think you at some level have to have a physical attraction. Just curious.

 

[Willing and Unsure]

i dont need the physical attraction (or at least i dont think so)... i've met some people online and have been attracted to them without having a clue as to what they look like (and never asking since it doesnt bother me).. its the personality that always does me in.. not the appearance

 

[Mistress]

I admit it, I like it if they have some looks

 

[april-wine]

whats inside is most important, even if someone is not attractive to me at first getting to them can change my mind....as well there are alot of good looking folks out there, that the more you get to know them the uglier they become.......

 

[morninggirl5]

For me, a person's physical attractiveness changes as I get to know them. If I truly care for them, then their imperfections become beautiful because those imperfections are a part of them. I have a friend that is from another part of the country and the first time we talked, his voice wasn't appealing to me. As we've talked and I've come to care for him, his voice is now extremely appealing to me.

 

[WildHoney]

Unusuallyconfused and Everyone,

My beliefs on that subject are the same as yours. I, too, believe that inner beauty is a much more important part of a person. Probably what happens is that because you've gotten to know a person's beautiful inner qualities, the vision you have of that person takes on the form of what you love most about them. Does this make sense to you? I think I'm having trouble trying to explain what I'm thinking. When you look into their eyes, all of the love from the inside shines through and reaches out to you and grabs you tight - so in a way, what you're attracted to is the beauty from within. Maybe because they are attracted to you they feel handsome or beautiful so that when they smile, what you see is love and affection smiling at you. Hence, you love that special smile they greet you with. Maybe the beautiful arms you are in love with occurred when you needed someone to lift you high when you were feeling down. Maybe those handsome thighs you love to touch have walked miles just to be with you, and you are amazed by that depth of that person's love.

I'm not sure if I've explained it properly.....but that's the best I can do right now.

WildHoney

 

[ChaoticLil]

I was in a bar with my ex a few years ago, and a friend of his saw a man dancing with a woman with one arm. He bent down and whispered in my ear something about the guy must be hard up to be dancing with a "one armed bandit". I just looked at him and said:
"If you go by looks alone, you going to miss a hell of a lot of good lays."

I firmly believe that statement. I have been with lots of men who aren't classically handsome, but have a wonderful sense of humor, intelligent, and best of all a really good fuck. In fact, my husband and boyfriend are one of the first people that I've been with that other people think are handsome. I fall in love/lust with the soul, not the shell.

 

[morninggirl5]

You explained it beautifully WH.

Welcome to the BB, haven't got to do that yet.

I'm a Kindergarten teacher, too. That patience in the classroom is a great asset here on occasion as well.

 

[Bluenose]

Well I am more attracted by ones personality and sense of humor than by their looks

 

[Comshaw]

posted by unusuallyconfused:

Physical Attractions Importance

I am in total accord that beauty is only skin deep and true beauty lies with the inner person. However, can you be attracted to someone without physical attraction? I think you at some level have to have a physical attraction. Just curious.

I don't believe you have to have physical attraction to be attracted to someone, but the best is a combination of the two.
The smell of a person, a touch from them can be like a lightning bolt. Nothing better then to lay in bed after a bout of sizzling sex with someone that you are totally physically attracted to, and talk with that same someone you admire and desire. The combination of the two is a recipe for heaven! No that attraction doesn't mean you have to be one of the beautiful people. It means to me that I have to find you attractive. And that is entirely different from physical beauty. It's a force, a power all it's own.

Comshaw

 

[mars99]

the male point of view

With each post WildHoney makes, I fall for her more and more and I have no idea what she looks like. That should sum up my feelings on the matter right there.

I think men, in our testosterone induced haze, tend to place a greater emphasis on looks, but I'm finding as I get older(I'm 30) that lessens. I'd far more rather spend time with a less attractive woman who knows how to communicate than a babe who can't add 2+2. But I'd be lying if I said looks were completely unimportant. They are and always will be to a certain extent, for both men and women, I think.

 

[MysteryJKR]

I dont like judging on physical appearance. Ive been judged for way to many years and I dont ever want someone to feel like I felt growing up and still do.

I think the same way as everyone else does in here id say. After a while a person just becomes so amazing and beautiful in there own way.

To many people lose chances or whatever because people dont wanna look at em the same cuz there looks arent as great as others may be. Ive grown to love all my friends on the net whom ive met over time and Ive only seen like half of em.

 

[unusuallyconfused]

I work with a lot of people I have never met, and have been very attracted to them. I have never seen them either. I'm in accord.

 

[Desert Amazon]

 

[WildHoney]

Morninggirl5,

Thank you for the warm welcome, it's nice meeting you, also. So, it seems we're in the same profession.....it's a very small world. I will tell you that, yes, patience has brought me through many a difficult situation in and out of the classroom.

Hey, I wanted to tell you that I saw all of your stars this morning. That picture is most different - I really like watching them pop out at you.

Have a great Wednesday!

WildHoney

 

[WildHoney]

Mars99,

I don't know what to say about your comment....I'm flattered beyond words. You're such a sweet person. But, I need to ask you a very important question....Will you still be feeling the same way about me tonight as you watch my Sixer's annihilate your Laker's? ha! A girl has to be sure of these things before she wanders into uncharted territory.

Anyway.....have a wonderful Wednesday and be thankful for the small things in life....that's what it's all about.

WildHoney

 

[batter]

inner beauty

shows through with a good sense of humor.

that is one of the things i enjoy in a person.
and if a person has a good heart and shows some caring and compassion for others, that too counts as inner beauty

 

[Angelus]

I never judge on physical appearance alone, one the odd occasions that I do.... I judge a person on what they are like on the inside, their personality, their sense of humor and everything that makes them who and what they are. What they look like is irrelevant (sp?)- if they don't have any personality or inner beauty to them then they are the type of person I would rather not know.

 

[Vivid Blossom]

mmm batter - I have to agree with you - even if I am still awed my that magnificent torso.

To me personality, sense of humor, caring attitude, the way a person treats other people -- all of those things are most important. I talked with my love for 6 months online falling more and more for him everyday. By the time we met I was so in love with him it wouldn't have mattered what he looked like.

 

[nasty]

Well said

posted by unusuallyconfused:



I don't believe you have to have physical attraction to be attracted to someone, but the best is a combination of the two.
The smell of a person, a touch from them can be like a lightning bolt. Nothing better then to lay in bed after a bout of sizzling sex with someone that you are totally physically attracted to, and talk with that same someone you admire and desire. The combination of the two is a recipe for heaven! No that attraction doesn't mean you have to be one of the beautiful people. It means to me that I have to find you attractive. And that is entirely different from physical beauty. It's a force, a power all it's own.

Comshaw

You don't have to have a supermodel look to you, but for me to be attracted to someone, I have to be attracted to both looks and personality.

 

[Juspar Emvan]

Reality check


Here at Lit you meet characters, and form initial opinions based on text. Presumably that text represents the personality behind the computer screen. Here it's easy to get to know someone without the superficial baggage getting in the way.

In real life your first impressions are invariably more emotive. What does this person look like, smell like, sound like? In a short lived opportunity (like a bar) these are the thing and the whole thing. If you don't connect with the individual based on them, you will not seek out further validation of them as a person. That doesn't mean to say they have to be built like a model, but whatever turns your personal crank has to be there. Personally I'm really interested in the way a girl moves.

In a longer association, like a work relationship, we have a chance to get to know the person behind the initial impression, without it being a focus on their suitability as a partner. So the looks become less important over time, but don't tell me you wouldn't make more effort to get to know the adonis or super model than you would the plain guy/girl.

At least that the truth I know applies to me.

Truth is beauty, beauty is truth.

 

[Morden]

I do agree that physical atraction is never before personality on my list. I have admit that I do like a variety in physical stature. I know that right now there are certain things I am looking for in a woman. Not ecause of certain public demands but more just because I was not satisfied with other things. I think however the emphasis on physical or beauty is the key. I find that we each desire a wide variety. The key for me is the whole package. Just as I like a girl with a nice a smile, I won't go out wiht her if she can't say a sentence worth saying.