Past Love Lost (closed)

[zydrate]

10 years ago

18 year old Dani Evans sat on the back of her boyfriend’s pickup truck, waiting for him after the game. It was senior year for the both of them and this was their last night together. Was it young love? Probably but deep down, Dani knew she loved Sebastian Moore, or Seb, as she affectionately called him. He was everything to her. He came from a good home and had a great family life which was quite the opposite of Dani’s life.

Others referred to her as trailer trash, but she knew she wasn’t. Her family was just poor. Hell, her father worked most of the time and drank the remaining time he was home, often beating his own kids, taking out his frustrations of losing his wife 10 years earlier to a heart attack. It was sudden and rare for someone so young. Dani would often escape to the woods and find peach and solace among the trees but when high school came, she joined as many clubs and activities she could just so that she didn’t have to go home too early.

Seb knew about how Dani’s father treated her, and he often told her he would kill her father if he hurt her again. But it did happen, and she always managed to talk him out of it. Soon, she’d be out of this town once they graduated.

Dani always thought she and Seb would attend the same college but he had told her the other night, he would be joining the military and that would mean he would be gone and out of touch but not for too long, he just needed to get through basic and then from there, a tour overseas. That was it. He promised he would stay in touch with Dani. And she believed him.

Of course, as young love was full of promises, it was also full of heartache as they had lost touch.

Dani did leave home and go to college but also worked full time at different jobs either as a bar hostess or waitress. She did what she could to get by as she put herself through nursing school. By the time she was 26, Dani had become a nurse. There wasn’t really anyone to share her accomplishments with, but she was proud of herself.

Present
Now, here it was, 10 years after graduating high school, 28 year old Dani Evans, found herself overseas and riding in a military convoy with some other volunteer nurses and doctors. They were on contract to lend their assistance where needed to different villages and towns in war torn countries. They were promised to be kept away as far away from the conflict as possible.

If that was the case, then why were they being led by military escort? Why was she in the back of a truck wearing a bullet proof vest? Why did everyone seem so tense? No one would tell the medical staff anything and that bothered Dani. It was the dead of night. They never moved at night. It was always in the day. Something wasn’t right.

As if on cue, the small convey was stopped at a check point. The leaders talked to those at the checkpoint. The next thing, a loud blast was heard. It was close. The medical staff looked to their military escort for direction but before they could say, more explosions and chaos. They were moved off out of the back of the trucks and told to take cover. Soon, shots rang out from both sides… what the hell was happening. They were told they wouldn’t be near any fighting…

 

[BeachBum25]

Sebastian Moore had been the big man on campus in high school. He came from a family that was well-off. He was the star quarterback on the football team and the star catcher on the baseball team. Sebastian could have had the pick of girls to be with. However, he only had his eye on one.... Dani Evans.

He was not one of those cocky kids that knew he was good at everything he did. Sebastian was level-headed and down to earth. He treated people the way they should be treated and he defended people that he felt others were mistreating. There were numerous times in high school that Sebastian saw someone being bullied, and he stepped in to end the bullying and tell the bullies to knock it off. Sometimes the bullies had been friends of his, which led to the end of their friendship. Sebastian didn't care. He didn't want to be friends with someone who mistreated others.

Sebastian had asked her out toward the end of their Junior year in high school. He was shocked when she said no. A week later, Sebastian tried again, and Dani agreed. From that point on Dani and Sebastian were always together. No, he did not give up his friends, but, if there was an opportunity to be with Dani, that was where you would find him.

Senior year went quickly. he had a very good year in football, but the coaches said he should have been better; they told him he wasn't putting in the extra time he needed to get a college scholarship. Sebastian didn't change though. Baseball season came and went, and yes, Sebastian played well, but not up to everyone's expectations. Just about everyone wanted to blame Dani for it. If they said that in front of Sebastian, he would go off. By the end of Senior year it was just him and Dani, and he was happy with that.

One Saturday morning while he was sitting at the breakfast table, his father came in and told Sebastian that he had talked to a football coach in California that was willing to give Sebastian a chance to earn a scholarship. He would have to walk-on as a Freshman, but, if he performed well, he could earn the scholarship. Sebastian told his father he did not want to go to California for school. He wanted to stay somewhere close. He could walk-on there. His father started in on Dani. "It's about that damned girl, isn't it. You are letting some tramp control your life. You are going to California to school. Either that, or you can figure out how to pay for somewhere else."

Sebastian blew up. He had known that his parents were not crazy about Dani, but calling her a tramp went too far. He went off on his father. "Fine, you do what you want. I don't want your money to go to school. Dani and I will figure out a way. She is not a tramp. You don't know a damned thing about her, and you have never taken the time to find out." Then he looked at his mother, shook his head, and stormed out of the house.

He spent the rest of the day driving around town. At one point, he drove past a military recruitment center. "Now, wouldn't that piss him off." After stopping to get gas, Sebastian was heading over to see Dani, and he passed the military recruitment center again. This time, he stopped.

"Baby, it will be perfect for us. Once I get through basic and then do a tour overseas, I will come back to the States, and we can be together wherever I am stationed. It is the best thing. You can go to school near where we will live and I can put in my time and then get out. It is just what we need."

He had no idea he would be wounded in combat a month after arriving in Afghanistan. He was one of the fortunate ones. Several had been killed when one of them stepped on an IED. Sebastian was transported stateside for treatment, but was determined to get back with his buddies who were still over there. He had to do a lot of Physical Therapy to be able to get back into action, but he did it, and was able to convince command to send him back.

*********************************

Sebastian never thought that he would spend this much time in the military. Many times over the years he thought about Dani, but he never wrote to her and he never called. At first, he didn't know what to say. The more time went by, the harder it got. Then, he figured that she would have moved on from him. How could he blame her. He had made her promises and didn't keep them.

He threw himself into the military. He was in Recon. He was committed to being the best he could be. He was always where the action was and he liked it that way.

There had been a recent change in territory controlled by the enemy, and Sebastian and the rest of his unit were sent in to gather information on the enemy and report back about their findings. As they were making their way, they approached a checkpoint. The information that they had been given said that the enemy line was 20 miles beyond that checkpoint, so, soon they would be getting out of their vehicles and doing a lot of work on foot.

As they got closer to the checkpoint, they noticed trucks stopped. Then, suddenly there were incoming mortar rounds. They stopped their vehicles a distance from the checkpoint. The attack only lasted a few minutes, during which one of the trucks at the checkpoint took a direct hit. Recon moved forward. It wasn't their job to deal with wounded, but they stopped to see if they could lend a hand and to see how many casualties there might be.

As Sebastian dismounted, and started toward the truck that had been hit, he stopped dead in his tracks. He looked at the woman. "No fucking way."

 

[zydrate]

The explosions stopped but the shouting continued. Again, not sure if it was safe to move, Dani had to check on her colleagues. She pressed herself against the tire of the truck they were forced out of. Everyone was yelling over one another, the other 2 nurses where not far and like Dani, they were scared out of their mind. But what about the 2 doctors?

She wanted to find them but there was too much chaos going on still. Dani was about to get up but one of the soldiers told her to stay where they were. What if they were attacked again? She was the most senior nurse of the others and so she did her best to stay calm… well, as calm as she could be in this situation.

Dani started to get up again when she heard a voice she hadn’t heard in a long time. A voice she thought she’d never hear again.

“Seb?!” She said in complete shock. It all rushed back to her… the last 10 years without him… Dani should have been mad at him. Mad at him for losing touch.

Mad at him for breaking promises.

But she knew she couldn’t be. Instead of wanting to smack him, like her mind told her to, her heart said something different. She jumped up and wrapped her arms around him quickly, thankful for something familiar. Dani quickly let go when another shell landed nearby…

 

[BeachBum25]

He wanted to ask her what she was doing here. Actually, there were a few questions Sebastian wanted to ask Dani, but now certainly wasn't the time.

"Get all of your friends and move off the road. Get away from the trucks; they are the targets. DO IT NOW... RIGHT NOW." He watched as Dani and the others moved off the road. There was no way to return fire. The mortar rounds were coming from a distance away. They called for some air support, but there was none that would be coming to help them. They were just going to have to wait it out.

What seemed like hours to the civilians was only about 20 minutes. Sebastian told them all to stay where they were, while his team and the staff from the checkpoint Went to check on the vehicles. Fortunately, none of the vehicles were damaged, which was a testament to the fact that it wasn't trained personnel who had launched the attack.

Once they were confident it was clear, so, they let the nurses know it was okay to return to the truck. Sebastian was busy talking with the team leader as the nurses were being loaded onto the truck. He broke away and went to the back of the truck. "Dani, can I talk to you for a second?"

He watched as she moved to the back of the truck. A lot of old feelings and emotions rushed over him as he watched Dani move toward him.

"What are you doing here? And by you, I am talking about you the individual and you the plural as in all of you ladies? Where the hell are you going?"

 

[zydrate]

Seb had said to get her friends off the road. Ha! Friends. Like back home, these other fellow “colleagues” treated Dani like a complete outsider, even though she held the same degree as them… had the same training. Even the doctors didn’t get along with the nurses too good. Well, unless you counted Dr. Tanner and Vanessa. But Dani as always, held her own. She was there for the job. To help others, not be in a popularity contest.

Dani wondered if the noise would stop. She hated it. She was still racking her mind about why this was happening! She looked at the map and knew they weren’t supposed to be anywhere near any fighting or this…these bombings.

Finally. It stopped. The 2 doctors had been found and had been with Dani and the nurses, keeping close as directed. Dani was hugging her knees and tried to keep calm through all this. Just something about all this wasn’t right.

When they got back into the truck, Dani went to the supplies to make sure they were still secured. It wasn’t much but they were told more would be provided when they got to their next destination in the morning. All the while, she thought about Seb.. what was he doing here? Well, it was obvious he was military but… there were so many other places he could have been but he was here… in the same place she was. She had to be wrong… that wasn’t him?

Yes, it was. Hearing him call after her and tell her that he needed to talk to her made her heart flutter. Yes, it was him. Why did she think otherwise? With legs shaking, she nodded and went to him. She hopped out of the truck and he led her away from the others and asked why she was there…why they were there.

Dani shrugged, crossing her arms in front of her, not looking directly at him because she wanted to keep her composure, “I don’t know why we’re particularly here… right here. We weren’t supposed to go near anything like this. I’m part of the Med Border Corp. We provide medical assistance to those in need and well…” she shrugged again. “We weren’t supposed to be here… we’ve never moved at night so I’m not even sure where ‘here’ is right now. I know we’re supposed to be in the Tandolar Village in the morning. But when I looked on the map, the trip shouldn't have taken more than 4 hours... it's been at least..." she looked at her watch, "Wow... 8 hours? Dr. Tanner had arranged everything, I just assumed we were loss?" Was that even possible? They had a military escort, did they even get loss?

 

[BeachBum25]

Listening to Dani, Sebastian was shocked that she was doing what she was doing. He had to admit to himself that she was proud of what she was doing, even though it wasn't his right to have pride in her. He had abandoned her years before and he had never been able to find the nerve to reach out to her and contact her to apologize.

"Dani, your escort obviously does not have very good intel. That village is currently occupied by the Taliban. It isn't safe for you to go there. Hell, it isn't safe for us to go there."

Sebastian didn't tell Dani that that was where his unit was on its way to. They were going there to find out as much information as they could about troop strength and fortification. It was the hope that the Coalition forces would be able to retake the village, but it wouldn't happen until his unit reported back.

"I have no idea why you would be sent out here, and I really don't know why you are travelling at night. It seems like whoever is guiding your group's movement needs to get their shit together. I don't know where you came from, but you need to head back there... and you need to go now. Our platoon leader is talking with the checkpoint staff, and then he will talk with your escorts. It isn't safe out here Dani. Not by a long shot."

He couldn't take his eyes off of her. Standing in front of him in the middle of nowhere was a beautiful woman.... a beautiful woman that he had abandoned years before. He had totally screwed it up all because he didn't know how to apologize for not keeping the original timeline that he had shared with her. What an ass he was.

"We have to get going, and you should too. Be safe Dani." Then, he took a shot. He wasn't sure it would be successful, but he went for it. "When I get back from this mission, I would like to talk with you. I wouldn't blame you if you told me to f-off, but I would like to talk with you... even if it is just on the phone."

She was quiet, and then he heard his unit being called together as they got ready to continue their mission. "Well, I understand. By the way, even out here wearing fatigues you look really good. Take care of yourself Dani. Don't let them have you doing anything stupid."

 

[zydrate]

And just like, he was gone again. Why didn’t she answer him when he asked to talk with her. Of course, it was OK, it was just a surprise he wanted to talk with her at all. She felt she was never good enough for Seb. He had to be married by now. Married to someone his parents approved of, if anything.

She watched him leave before she was called back to get back into the back of the truck…

He had said she looked good in her fatigues. She looked down at herself and wondered what the hell he was thinking. It made her smile for a brief moment. Her clothing fit like a potato sack and looked just as baggy. But damn, he did look good in his gear, that was for sure. She remembered when he was first shipping off, they had spent the night together… and the next day, she had seen him off…

Soon, the convey was back on its way, this time, going in a different direction.

“So, who was that?” Dr. Allen had asked. Dani shrugged, “Someone from home.”

“An ex?”

Dani didn’t answer. Instead, she closed her eyes, grabbing her personal bag and put it behind her head as a pillow. She wasn’t sure how long it would take to reach their destination, but she was exhausted in their travelling.

This was their last assignment. It was slated to last for 2 weeks in a village. And as much as it was rewarding to help, Dani could have done with different people to work with.


*** 6 weeks later ***
“Why are you even going?” Sasha had asked her older sister as she got ready for the night. “All they did at that school was fuck with us every day.”

Dani shrugged, “I don’t know. I figured, I’m already in town to help you move and saw stupid Kristy at the grocery store, who not only invited me but also tried to get me to join her dumb MLM. I know her friendliness was fake but, I just feel like showing up at this 10-year reunion.” Dani turned her younger sister.

“Ehh, OK, I guess.” She teased and they both laughed. They hadn’t had a lot to laugh at when growing up. Dani had vowed to Sasha they would get out of their abusive father’s hand and Dani worked hard to make it come true for the both, despite certain plans that were derailed. Agreeing to work as a contract nurse for that organization was a big help as the pay was enough to put toward Sasha’s graduate school.

“You know… you’re probably right, I should stay home.” Dani had said, suddenly getting nervous. What if this wasn’t a good idea. Sasha was right, school wasn’t exactly a pleasant thing… then again, neither was home life.

“No, no… you’re going. I have a date tonight and I’m hoping—”

“To bring him home…got it. Just be careful.”

“Always.”

***
The gym was lively, more than it had ever been back when Dani was a student. It looked like there were a lot of renovations done and well, it just wasn’t what she remembered. She had managed to talk to a few former classmates in passing. Some were glad to see her but of course, she read it as a fake happiness. Yeah, nothing had changed. It didn’t’ matter, she wouldn’t let that bother her. But she felt she was going to have to call it a night early.

She had just finished talking with Carla before Carla excused herself and went to go dance with her husband. Dani watched for a moment before turned and running smack into someone’s hard chest.

Gary Stevens. One of Dani’s first bullies. “Well, well, Dani Evans. Look at you. I thought I recognized you. How are you doing sweetheart.”

Sweetheart? Dani scoffed and shook her head, “Hi Gary.”

“I didn’t think I’d see you around. Hell, not since your old man died, I didn’t think you’d be back.”

Dani took a deep breath and nodded, “Yeah, well, I’m moving my sister out so she can finish her school—”

“Yeah, anyway,” he said, interrupting, “Let’s dance.”

“No…thanks, I’m OK. I was actually going to get going now.”

“No, I think you should stay.”

Dani laughed, “I think it doesn’t matter what you think. Don’t try me again Gary, remember what happened last time?”

He laughed, “Please, you got in a lucky shot that one time.” He said, remember how she had kicked in the balls when he tried to take advantage of her.

“Whatever. Have fun Gary.” She walked away and didn’t look back. Maybe Sasha was right, she shouldn’t have come. It wasn’t miserable but it certainly wasn’t any fun. Dani sent a text to her sister, asking her to pick her up when she was able.

 

[BeachBum25]

It was a good thing that Dani and her group did not make it to the village they were heading for. The village was now under the control of the Taliban; at least for the time being. Once Sebastian and his team were able to gather information, the coalition would be able to take the village back and hopefully they would get the medical care they needed.

After returning to base upon forwarding the information, Sebastian started contemplating leaving the military. It was odd that he was thinking about it now, because it never really crossed his mind before. He enjoyed what he was doing despite the danger involved. Was he thinking about it because he had seen Dani? He surely did not have any thoughts that they would ever get back together. Hell, he was certain that she was married by now.

The more he thought about leaving, the more he was leaning toward it. There was really only one thing that kept him from doing it..... what would he do when he got out? Sure, he could go into law enforcement. There had to be jobs somewhere in the country that he could use his military experience with. Of course, he could always go back to school and earn his degree, but that would take years. Sure, he could learn a trade.. hell, they paid well these days.

A couple weeks later, Sebastian decided he was not going to re-up. He still had no idea what he was going to do, but, ever since seeing Dani, he wasn't into the military anymore. Yes, it was odd, but he was afraid that he would get himself or someone else killed or wounded because his head just wasn't into it.

After getting out, he went back to his hometown. He didn't check in with his parents; he hadn't talked to either of them in 10 years. He got a hotel room on the outskirts of town; figuring he would stay there for a couple weeks while trying to find a job and move on with his life. Sebastian went to Phil's one night after eating at the local diner. Phil's was the dive bar in town. He went there to have a couple of beers, because he figured nobody there would know him. He was wrong.

Midway through his first beer, he felt a tap on his shoulder. Sebastian took a deep breath. He really didn't want trouble, and he assumed that the person tapping his shoulder was looking for a fight. He turned around. ''Listen I don't want to have to...." It was then that he saw Chuck Murray. They had played baseball together in high school. Chuck was standing there with Paula Reed... or was it Paula Murray neow? They had been a thing in high school, and it looked like they still were.

"Hey, what are you two doing here. This place looks like it is well below your standards." Sebastian turned to the bartender... "no offense intended." Chuck and Paula said they stopped at Phil's whenever they were trying to avoid the regular group of people they had gone to school with. Paula told Sebastian that he was one of the few people that had left town and hadn't returned.

"Well, it looks like I am back... for a little while anyway." They talked for a couple hours; catching up on the people they had gone to school with. One person was not mentioned... Dani. Sebastian didn't ask about her and Chuck and Paula didn't mention her. Sebastian didn't mention her because he knew he had messed up, and he figured Chuck and Paula didn't mention her because they knew the history and Dani was with someone else by now.

Paula sked if he was going to the reunion tomorrow night. "I didn't know anything about it, and even if I did, I wouldn't go. I don't think I want to see all of those people. I figure, if there are people I want to see... like you two... we can just meet somewhere and have a good time together." Chuck said he understood. Paula started nagging him. "Come on Seb, you have to go. Everyone will be happy to see you. There were a lot of people who were said you went into the military and really didn't say goodbye." Sebastian shook his head no. That, however, didn't keep Paula from trying to convince him to go.

She kept it up and kept it up. Sebastian looked at Chuck. Chuck just shrugged his shoulders, smiled, and said, "welcome to my world. Don't get me involved in it. I already have to go." Sebastian laughed at him. Finally, he relented. "Alright, alright. I will go, but just for a little while." He shook his head. "Now, I am going to have to go out and buy something to wear. Thanks for having my back Chuck." They all laughed and had another drink.

The next morning, Sebastian went shopping for a new suit. he needed to find a place that could tailor it and have it ready for him to wear to the reunion that night.

Walking into the high school brought back a lot of memories. Some good, some not so good. Wearing the charcoal gray suit he bought that morning with a white shirt and a gray and red striped tie, Sebastian walked up to the reception table and gave his name and told the woman that he had not responded because he had been overseas. He paid in cash for the ticket and walked down the hallway toward the gym.

He walked through the doors into the gym and stopped. "Dani?" He couldn't believe she was here. He never thought she would come to anything at the school.

"Are you leaving?"

 

[zydrate]

Dani knew not to take things so personally with these clowns but for some reason, nothing had really changed. Oh well, not that it mattered. She had done what she set out to do. Make a better life for herself and now, she was helping in getting her sister out of there. But after that…what then? She hadn’t really thought of it. As a nurse, she could get a job literally anywhere… and the sign on bonuses that came with it? It would help a lot with things if she needed to move but then, some would pay for her move.

As much as she wanted to be near her sister, she knew she had to let her off on her own someday.

Her phone vibrated and it was a reply from Sasha who said she wouldn’t be able to pick up Dani just yet. Sasha and her boyfriend had just ordered dinner. Perfect. Oh well, she had to rely on her little sister only because her own car was packed to the brim with half of Sasha’s stuff in prep for the move.

There were a few ladies Dani had ended up talking with. She remembered hanging out with them once in a while and that went to prove not everyone was a complete jerk in high school.

Feeling Gary’s leering stare at her. If he creeped her out before, adulthood hadn’t changed that at all. Why was he suddenly so interested?

Fresh air… she needed fresh air.

All night, Dani had tried to keep her mind occupied and not think of how this night would be a lot better if Seb were here. She didn’t know how to feel when she saw him back overseas. At first it was confusion, why was he there… and then it dawned on her, dummy, he was in the military. Funny how they still ended up coming together, even for a brief moment.

Excusing herself, Dani headed to the main exit. Yes, she needed air now.

As she was close to the doors, she thought her mind was playing tricks on her… but that voice. His voice.

Seb.

She stopped and looked at him. Was he here? Really? In front of her again? Dani was at a loss for words… he asked her something, right?

“I need…” she took a deep breath, “I was just stepping out for some air…” she said, as usual, not wanting to inconvenience anyone, she moved around him, “I’ll be back.” Of course, she knew he wouldn’t let her go out along.

Once outside, Dani closed her eyes, putting a hand on her stomach and taking a deep breath. She didn’t hear Seb behind her, always close by as before. She calmed herself down, not knowing what happened there. She composed herself and turned to Seb, “Sorry about that..” she didn’t want to admit she just almost had a panic attack… something she hadn’t had in a long time… only in school with most of these… classmates.

“I didn’t expect to see you here..” she smiled and took a step back, “You look good.” And that wasn’t a lie. Seb always looked good to her. It was sometimes a mystery to why he had asked her out. When he first did, she had said no. Only because she thought it was a joke. She didn’t trust easily… then he asked again. Why did she say yes? At first, it was just her way of submitting to whatever joke was to be pulled to be over and done with. But it wasn’t like that. And that was the shocking part for her. It took most of their junior year for her to finally trust him. And since, she never stopped trusting him. Yes, they had lost touch, even with the promises of being together, she still trusted him.

 

[BeachBum25]

Sebastian watched as Dani walked past him and went down the hall and outside of the school. He heard her say she needed some air, so, he followed her to make sure she was okay.

Once outside, he stood behind Dani; close but not crowding her. Sebastian wasn't sure if he was the reason that she needed to get some air, so, if he was, he wanted to have space between them.

When she turned and said that she was sorry about that, he still wasn't sure if he was the reason for her rushing out. He started to feel that he was the reason when she said that she did not expect to see him here.

Watching her step back from him, Sebastian took a step back from Dani, putting even more distance between them. He thanked her when she said he looked good. "You like this outfit better than the last outfit you saw me in?" Sebastian smiled at her.

"I thought you looked good when I bumped into you in the middle of nowhere in Afghanistan, however, you really look good tonight."

They talked for a little while. When Sebastian found out that Dani was single, he was shocked. He did not show his feelings with any outward reaction, but he was genuinely surprised that someone so attractive was single. He listened to her tell him about finishing school and becoming a nurse. "I knew your drive and determination would take you far. You were always a winner."

He did not share with Dani that he had left the military and was currently unemployed. Part of the reason he didn't was that she didn't ask about what he was doing. The other reason he didn't say anything was that he wasn't sure that she would be happy that he was unemployed. Of course, why would she care, it wasn't like they were together or anything?

Sebastian asked about what had happened inside, and Dani told him about Gary Stevens and how creepy he had been. "Some things never change, do they?"

"Do you want to go back inside or are you calling it a night? If you want to go back inside, I will stay close to you and keep Stevens away from you. If not, maybe we could go somewhere and just talk. After all, the night is still early."

 

[zydrate]

Dani thought about it and shrugged, "I don't want to go back in. I think I'm done with this place." She was talking about the school. It was just as bad and she wondered what she thought would change? Nothing with those clowns.

Not all of them were clowns of course. Seb was a sight for sore eyes. Yes, it was a surprise to see him here but it was a good surprise.

"I had sent Sasha a text to come pick me up but she can't be here for another hour or so." She stepped closer to Seb, "If you don't mind, I'd like to go elsewhere to talk." Dani always felt safe around Seb and now was no different. He just brought out a different side of her that no one else had or could.

Had there been someone else besides Seb? Yes, but no one to be deemed special enough to say she loved them. Not like how she and Seb had been.

Were promises made? Yes. Were those same promises broken? Yes. But still, Dani had pushed that pain aside and did what she needed to do in order to survive and get her education. Get out of this forsaken town. But yet, here she was, back again.

That made her wonder, what was Seb doing here?

He guided her to his car and opened the passenger door for her before getting in and driving. It didn't matter where they went to. She was open for being anywhere at the school.

 

[BeachBum25]

Sebastian was trying to figure out where they should go. They were too dressed up to go to Phil's; they would certainly stand out there. He decided to go to the Stumble Inn. The name i plied dive bar, but it was a nice quiet place where they could get a booth and talk.

While driving, Sebastian asked Dani about Sasha. "How is your sister doing, Dani? What is she up to?" He listened as Dani gave him a rundown on what was going on with Sasha and how Dani had been helping her out.

Once at the Stumble Inn, Sebastian opened the door for Dani and led her inside. They found a booth toward the back, and Sebastian asked Dani what she wanted to drink. He walked up to the bar and ordered their drinks and returned to the booth and sat across from Dani.

"I never expected to see you there tonight Dani. I didn't think you would ever want to have anything to do with that place again. Hell, I am surprised I was even there. If I didn't run into Paula and Chuck last night at Phil's, I wouldn't have known anything about the reunion. I didn't want to go, but Paula kept nagging me and Chuck was no help. I guess they will be mad at me. Oh well."

He paused for a second. He was talking fast, because he was nervous and he was afraid that Dani would ask him what happened and why had he never contacted her. She deserved to know, he just wasn't ready to answer. "I just got back into town and was at Phil's because I needed to get out of the hotel room I am staying in until I figure out what I am going to do with my life now that I left the military."

Sebastian did not tell her that he never thought about leaving the military until he saw her in Afghanistan. He didn't tell her anything. He knew she would ask the questions, and he decided that he would answer them one at a time when she asked.

 

[zydrate]

“She’s doing good…’ Dani had told Seb she was sending her little sister one state over so she could finish on her degree. Dani had funded what she could, and she was currently paying for the entire move from the money she had earned while overseas. Personally, Dani had just wanted her little sister to have better and if it required pushing her, then that’s how it was going to be.

They got a back booth and Dani asked for a glass of white wine. They both settled in and took a sip of their drinks. She listened to him talk about being here and why he was at the reunion. She knew of Chuck and Paula but didn’t really know them personally. Dani had spent her high school years making sure her grades were kept up so she could get out of this place and the only way she could do that was through scholarships. She spent what little time she had with Seb and never did regret it.

“I didn’t expect to see you here also… I didn’t even know about this reunion until Sasha had said something about it… I wasn’t going to go at first but then, decided to see what had changed.” She made a face and took a sip of her drink, shrugging as she recalled Gary and his stupid antics, “things did not change.”

It really was good seeing him again, especially now.

He mentioned he said he was staying at a hotel and that made her a little uneasy… only because she felt that it was her fault, he and his parents had a falling out. She had assumed that they would have made up or had made up but…. Dani nodded, “And your parents don’t know you’re back?”

She knew the answer, but he never got mad at her for asking personal questions. “I’m sorry.” She said quietly. A moment of silence between them, nothing uncomfortable, just silence. There was more she wanted to ask but now wasn’t the time.

“So, yes, Sasha is working on her degree for teaching. She loves kids and wants to follow in the steps of one of her former elementary teachers, so, she’s making things happen. Right now, she’s out at dinner with a friend. And then tomorrow, we’re driving her out to her new home. After that... I’m not sure… at least for me. All I know is that I want to make sure she’s safe.”

 

[BeachBum25]

"I am so happy for Sasha. She was always a good kid. I am also really happy for you. You have done so well for yourself Dani, and it is great that you can help your sister out. I must admit that I am shocked you are still here. I thought you would have left the first chance you got."

Sebastian stopped suddenly. If he had upheld his end of the bargain, Dani would have been out of the town a lot of years ago... with him. So, he changed the subject.

"My parents and I have not spoken a word since I left. They said they would never forgive me. I thought I couldn't forgive them for not respecting my decision. I tried to reach out a few years ago. I was on leave in Germany. I called them and he hung up the phone as soon as he heard it was me. I called back hoping she would answer. She did and she proceeded to tell me that their son had walked out on them and was no longer part of their life. I tried to be the bigger person, but they made their choice. Plus, I don't know how long I am going to be in town, so, that is why I am in the hotel." Wow, that wasn't really changing the subject. That was just taking the same subject in a different direction. It still dealt with him leaving Dani behind.

He heard Dani say she was sorry. "Dani, what are you sorry for. You didn't do anything. It is their choice and I have accepted it. To be honest with you, the only reason I am here....." He wanted to say that she was the reason he was there, but he didn't know how she would take it. "... the only reason I am here is that this is the starting point. I left from here, and I am going to start anew from here."

Sebastian took a sip of his beer. It felt so good to be sitting across from Dani. It also hurt so bad. He had abandoned her. He had been such an ass and left the best thing that ever happened to him behind. Look what she had done with herself since he was gone. She finished school, got her nursing degree, travelled to Afghanistan to help those less fortunate. "Great move Sebastian, " he thought to himself.

"So, Sasha is out on a date on the night before she leaves town. Is this a guy she has been seeing, or is it someone new?" He was trying to get the focus away from the awful decision he had made 10 years before. He still didn't know whether Dani was married, engaged, dating someone, single. He was not going to ask her. If that came up, it would be Dani that broached the subject.

 

[zydrate]

Dani tried not to roll her eyes at the mention of Sasha’s date. Dani was only being protective of her little sister but really, her boyfriend was an OK guy, “Yeah, the newly elected mayor’s son.” She smiled and shrugged. Thankfully, she was relaxing a little more after the small amount of wine she had sipped on so far.

Growing up, Dani was always under the impression that those well off didn’t have problems. While those in her situation had all the problems. She had grown up with an abusive father and Dani always ended up making sure she took the brunt of her father’s aggressions, just as long as he stayed away from Sasha. Dani sacrificed a lot for her little sister.

She sat there and just looked at him, “You’ve changed,” she said, “and by that, I mean, you’ve grown up a lot.” She placed her hands around the stem of her wine glass, looking at it and then back at Seb. “I mean, I know we’ve both changed but you… you’re different. In a good way.”

“You say you want to start anew… from here…” she nodded, seeing what he was saying, “I get it. I guess I’m doing the same. Sasha is off to do better things and I don’t have to worry about her as much but, yeah, I think it’s a new start for myself also. I’m not sure how, but we’ll see, I’m sure.”

 

[BeachBum25]

"Dani......" Sebastian started to try to apologize for what had happened 10 years before. However, even now that he was sitting with her, he struggled to find the words.

"I saw a lot while serving in the military. Much of what I saw was not good. It definitely changes one's perspective on many different things, and on life in general." He looked into Dani's eyes. "I guess by saying that I have grown up, you mean that I was immature. Thank you for saying I have grown up in a good way, but, in my opinion, you are the one who has grown.. .not necessarily grown up.. but grown in such a positive way."

Taking a drink of his beer, Sebastian tried to collect his thoughts. There were so many things running through his head right now, and he couldn't get them in order.

"I look at what you have overcome to get where you are today Dani, and I just think you are amazing. You overcame an abusive father, a school environment that was toxic with a student body that were just assholes and didn't understand what you lived with everyday. You had to deal with all of that, and here you are an RN who is working to get her younger sister through school in addition to having spent time overseas helping those less fortunate." He shook his head a little as he left out that she had dealt with a boyfriend who promised to take her away from this town. "Just amazing."

Yes, it was eating him up. He wanted to apologize to Dani. He didn't know how. Actually, he did know how, just let it out, but he couldn't bring himself to find the way to get started with it.

"I decided to start here, because it is where I left from. It isn't because I had anything here to come back to." There it was.... the chance to really talk to Dani.

"The only thing I left here that I really cared about...... was you." He paused for a brief moment to gauge her reaction. "Dani, you were the only thing from this town that I really cared about, and I was a fool and left you behind. I say I didn't have anything to come back to, because I was certain that you..... well, I didn't think you would still be here. I thought you would have moved away from here... and started a family."

He finished his beer and placed the glass down on the table. "Stuff happened, and then I didn't know how to tell you about it. The more time that went by, the harder it got for me to reach out to you. Then, I just figured you would have moved on, so, ...."

 

[zydrate]

Dani listened intently to what Seb was saying. It was often times she was the only one who gave him the time and attention to let him really be him, let him express what it was exactly he was trying to say without interrupted him. Like she did tonight, she listened to him. It was as if they were the only 2 in the place and all her attention was on him and vice versa.

“Seb…” she said softly, reaching out and putting her hand on his, “Please don’t think of it like that. You didn’t leave me, we had plans, yes, but…” how did she want to say this without sounding callous… “I mean, please don’t get me wrong, I was hurt when we lost touch, but I figured the same thing about you, you found someone else or just had gotten too busy with your new life in the military…or both. I did what I could to get you out of my mind, as usual, I put my focus fully toward school and work… whatever I could to not think about you, but you know what?” She looked into his eyes, “I still thought about you no matter what. I just wanted you happy…”

“I know we drifted apart but I kept telling myself it was because we were young that we just… didn’t make it.” Dani took a deep breath, trying not to let her voice quiver, “I had to push myself more and knew that someone else was counting on me and like I said, that’s where I put my focus on.”

But now, Sasha was no longer depended on her big sister, at least not quite as much. Dani would always be there for her but now, she had time to focus on herself…

Was this a new start? Like Seb, was this a new start for her also?

“I’m only still here because of Sasha, but now, she’s going elsewhere for school and as much as I want to follow her to make sure she’s OK, I know I can’t do that. So… I guess you could say this is new start for me also.” She finished off her wine and sat back, not looking at Seb, letting him process what she had said…

 

[BeachBum25]

Sebastian listened to Dani talk about letting Sasha go and engaging on a new start. He wondered what she had in mind. However, he didn't dare ask her. If she wanted him to know what she was thinking of doing, she would tell him. After what had happened between them before, he had no right to ask her.

"I left the military because it was time to go. I don't know what it was time to go to, but it was time to stop what I was doing. If I didn't get out now, I would have made it a career. There were times where I thought I would be in for life, but, recently, I just decided I wanted out. Now, I have to decide what to do and where to do it."

There was a brief moment of silence, and then Sebastian got up and walked to the bar and got them each another drink. When he returned, he placed the fresh drink in front of Dani, and sat back in the booth. Despite his time in the military, he was not a big drinker. Yes, most men in the military have a reputation for being big drinkers. Although, some were, it wasn't true for the large majority.

"No, I am not trying to get you drunk Dani." Sebastian laughed. "Two beers is my limit, especially when I am driving. I just thought one more while we talked would keep the bartender from coming over and asking us if we were going to pay rent for the booth."

He took a sip of his beer. "Coming back here has convinced me that this is not where I want to get my fresh start." Sebastian took another sip of his drink. "especially after talking with you tonight. It seems like nothing has changed here, and that there is not going to be anything here that would make me want to stay."

Sebastian looked down at the table, then to his beer before taking another drink.. this one a big one.

 

[zydrate]

They were both quiet for a moment as Dani took in what Seb was saying. She took a sip of her wine and sat back, “You’re right, nothing here has changed. Tonight’s my last night here. I just happened to be here when I found out that this reunion was taking place.” She smiled and shook her head, “I’m not even sure why I went. I have nothing to prove to anyone and well, I just thought would be different.”

Dani really thought it was going to be different. It was in a way… and that way was Seb was there.

He had mentioned he thought she’d have a family by now. As much as she had wanted one, there was no time… she had been focused on Sasha more than anything. Now, now was the time to have time to focus on herself…? Perhaps. It would depend, she guessed.

“So yeah, tomorrow, after we drive up to Sasha’s new school, I’m headed back to Dallas… after that, who knows. I have a job to go back to if I want but the thing is, I’m not sure if I want… at least not yet.”

 

[BeachBum25]

Sebastian felt himself to be in a position that he was terribly unfamiliar with.... not knowing what to say. He was so happy to be in Dani's company, yet, he couldn't come out and tell her that. He was shocked to here that she was moving away, but he was happy for her. Yet, he couldn't say that. He hoped to spend more time with her and get reacquainted, but he couldn't say that. He couldn't say any of that to Dani, because he had no idea how she would take it after what had happened between them.

It was odd. Sebastian seemed frozen by what had happened... what he had done. Dani, on the other hand, did not seem to be upset with him. For years, he thought that if he ever saw Dani again that she would go off on him for abandoning her after making promises to her. Nothing like that happened. Dani was not concerned about the past, it seemed. The only thing Dani was looking at was the future.

"Dallas, huh? How bout dem Cowboys." Damn, that was awkward. Sebastian just shook his head after he said it. "I am sorry Dani. For the first time in my life, I don't know what to say. I have never had a problem talking to people. Hell, I have had conversations with generals only minutes after meeting them, but here I am with you and I don't know what to say."

All of a sudden the ice was broken, and the words came pouring out.

"It is so nice to be sitting here talking with you. I am so happy to hear how you have done such incredible things for you and Sasha. You are really amazing; overcoming everything you had to overcome and helping your sister to follow her dream. Then knowing that you want to go to Dallas, and having options on whether you go back to your job or not. I am not sure that I have the right to say this, but I am going to say it anyway.... I am really proud of you. You are amazing. I always knew that. You have just done things that prove that you are amazing."

It felt good to get that off his chest. There was the big thing still out there though.

"Dani, I am so sorry for what I did to you. After I finished boot camp, and got to my first assignment, I knew that it wasn't the right place for you to be. You would have been there all alone while I was training and then when I got deployed. I wanted to call you and tell you that, but I was afraid I would disappoint you. Stupid, I know. When I didn't call you, it got harder and harder with each day to reach out. After a while, I was sure you had moved on. It hurt me to think of you with someone else, but I knew you deserved to be happy and that I could not expect you to wait around for me..... considering that I had just blown you off."

Sebastian finished his beer, before finishing his diatribe. "Dani, the truth is, I never stopped loving you.... NEVER." He took out his wallet, and from his wallet he took an old picture. It was dirty and stained and weatherbeaten, and it was Dani. "I wore this picture of you on my helmet.... everyday. Yes, it was on my helmet when we ran into each other in Afghanistan. I am sure you didn't notice, because of everything that was going on, but it was right there on the left side of my helmet, under the band."

Sebastian lifted his hands off the table and turned his palms up and shrugged his shoulders. "There it is Dani. That is probably more than you wanted to hear.... more than you care to hear. It is probably... no it is definitely, selfish of me to dump all of this on you. I am sorry for that. If you want, I'll take you home now."

After getting all of that off his chest, he felt like shit. He felt like he unloaded everything on the one person who he never should unload his shit on.

 

[zydrate]

“Damnit Seb…” Dani said, as she sat back in the booth, her shoulders slumped. All this time, she had tried to be strong. Just like she did when she was in high school. Thinking her resolve could fight all the hurt and disappointment in her life. But there were times, like now, she couldn’t do it anymore.

She had taken the picture from Seb and looked at it, held it in her own hand. It was her senior picture. The one and only she had given out… given to Seb.

“You must think I’m a real jerk for not saying anything about the past…” she sighed and smiled, although her own voice was shaky, “I thought you yourself had moved on. Maybe… even thinking about what your father had said to me one time that I was just a fling. That you would find better… and I held onto that. I mean… I didn’t want to think you with anyone else yet, I did hope you find someone better…” she took a small sip of her wine, “I’m not saying that right… not hearing from you was hard but I dealt with it by throwing myself into my schooling… my work as a waitress, bartender…whatever it was I was doing at time to put food on the table. I think I pushed you out of my mind because I wanted you to find better…”

She could feel her eyes watering, but she held it in, “I loved you then… I can honestly say that I still love you… and seeing you that day in the desert… that was like a kick in the gut to remind me, you’re still in my heart no matter how much I tried to mask it up…tried to push it away. You were there for me after the beatings from my father... you were there when the teasing in school got too much, and I remember you wanting to hurt those who hurt me…”

Dani took a breath, “and it’s not selfish for what you just said… you didn’t dump anything on me…” she leaned forward, her chin on her hand as her elbow rested on the table. “Things happened… maybe that night in the desert was a way to bring us together… maybe that’s why tonight happened…” she pushed the picture of herself that he had shown her back to him as if to say, the ball was in his court now.

 

[BeachBum25]

Watching Dani push the picture back across the table to him, Sebastian thought about everything that she said. He still had not told her that, prior to seeing her in the desert, leaving the military had never crossed his mind. Was it a coincidence? He thought not.

He picked up the picture, looked at it and then he looked at Dani

"I don't think you are a jerk Dani. I figured you had moved on from it... from me. Why would I think anything else? Why would I expect you to still have any positive feelings for me after what happened?"

Sebastian put the picture back in his wallet.

"Dani, until I saw you in the desert, I had not even considered leaving the military. After completing that mission, the only thing on my mind was getting out. It wasn't like I thought that I would come back here and we would pick up where we once were. Hell, I am sitting in front of you with no job and living out of a hotel room. I just know that I still love you.... never stopped. Maybe that night in the desert was, like you said, was a way to bring us together. I have never been one to believe in things like that, but...."

He wondered if this was truly meant to be. Was this the world's way of fixing something that he had fucked up 10 years ago?

"Maybe all of these things happened for a reason. It almost seems like there are too many things that happened for it to be a coincidence.... we meet in the desert, you go to a reunion at the school that you hated and where you were mistreated, I bump into two people who convince me to go to a reunion I knew nothing about.... we bump into one another as I am walking in and you are walking out to get some fresh air. Is it possible that all of that happened for a reason?"

Reaching across the table, Sebastian took Dani's hand in his. "I don't know what the future holds Dani. Hell, you are leaving tomorrow and not coming back. I have no idea what is next for me. You have your shit together, and I don't even have a job. Can we work? I would like to think so... I would hope so, but I don't know what it would look like Dani. Shit, I know I am rambling again. I guess what I am saying is I hope we can be together."

 

[zydrate]

"Move on?" she shook her head, "I've been so concentrated on Sasha, I've sort of put anything for myself on hold... again, maybe it was for a reason." Maybe it was for a reason. it wasn't that Dani hadn't been actively looking for a love life, she had just thrown herself in to her work and whatever it took to make sure her little sister was taken care of.

He took her hand in his and Dani didn't pull away, of course. She gave his hand a squeeze, holding him.

They were both quiet for a few minutes as Dani thought about it all. She felt there was something more to talk about but now wasn't the time. They would need a more quiet place to continue such an intimate conversation.

"I think it worked between us pretty good last time... even with people trying to pry us apart, we've no one to really answer to, not that we ever did." Dani didn't mention she still felt extremely guilty for causing a rift between Seb and his parents. She knew there was more to that but she still felt like part of the cause.

 

[BeachBum25]

Sebastian sat quietly looking into Dani's eyes.... holding her hand. It felt so good to be with her even though he really didn't anticipate seeing her.

"Things were great between us." He paused, which kept him from saying until he messed things up. It was time to start being positive and looking forward.. not back. "We only had each other to answer to. People that tried to pry us apart got left behind."

He gave Dani a big smile. "We were really good together, weren't we?"

Squeezing her hand. "I am so happy for Sasha. I think it is great that she is finishing school. She is so lucky to have someone like you to support her on her journey. I know you have a big day tomorrow taking her to school. I think we should get out of here."

He walked up and paid his tab and left the bartender a tip. Walking back to the table, Sebastian took Dani's hand and helped her out of her seat. They walked out of the bar hand-in-hand. It felt right... like it was supposed to be.

When they got to the car, Sebastian opened the door for her. Before Dani could get into the car, he cupped her cheek and gave her a soft kiss. That felt right too. Looking into her eyes. "I never stopped loving you." Then, he kissed her again before breaking it and letting Dani get into the car. He did not want to make a scene in the parking lot of a bar.

As he drove, he held Dani's hand. "I hope you don't walk in on anything with Sasha and her boyfriend."

 

[zydrate]

As if things hadn’t changed, Seb was taking care of Dani again. She always felt safe with him… a comfort she realized she had missed. In the back of her mind, she was wondering if this could really work. Or was she setting herself up again? Would he leave again?

No, damnit… stop thinking that way and enjoy the time now… her mind screamed at her. They walked back to the car, holding hands… nothing needing to be said, just the two of them enjoying this time together. At the car, Dani wanted to say she was surprised by the kiss, but she wasn’t. In fact, she was wanting it from the first moment they had set eyes on each other again back in the desert. It just felt so right, and she wanted more…

Yes, there were doubts but they could… would work through them, right? Dani was a bit disappointed that yes, she had to leave tomorrow but they had tonight, a least a couple of more hours.

She laughed and gave his hand a squeeze, “I hope so too but I have a feeling they’re not even home yet. This is the last night they’ll be together for a while so, who knows.” The ride continued, both were quiet again… She looked over at him and just looked at him, not believing he was here with her again...