Our version of a (slightly) exagerated interview with HKBJ...
- Thread starter lobito
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Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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Spoken with her best HKBJ voice....
"Well it has been a little slow this last few weeks. We ran out of Duct tape cuz some Government guy said we should use it to tape our houses shut.
So I am out of work until we find a replacement."
"Well it has been a little slow this last few weeks. We ran out of Duct tape cuz some Government guy said we should use it to tape our houses shut.
So I am out of work until we find a replacement."
Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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again with that voice...
Well after months of crying and whining here, someone finally replied to my personal ad, then for four months, I convinced her I was not insane after all, then we had four wonderful months of bliss, then she managed to find the key to the handcuffs and got away, and for the last four months I have been looking for her.
Well after months of crying and whining here, someone finally replied to my personal ad, then for four months, I convinced her I was not insane after all, then we had four wonderful months of bliss, then she managed to find the key to the handcuffs and got away, and for the last four months I have been looking for her.
Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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with the voice...
When I wasn't high, I used to think that Pot might be part of the problem, but after that last joint, I realized it wasn't the pot that was the problem, but instead it was the tampon wrappers I was using as papers. Someone said they weren't supposed to be the same wrappers that the used tampons were wrapped up in when they were thrown away. So now that I know what causes that, I strictly use coke cans as pipes instead.
When I wasn't high, I used to think that Pot might be part of the problem, but after that last joint, I realized it wasn't the pot that was the problem, but instead it was the tampon wrappers I was using as papers. Someone said they weren't supposed to be the same wrappers that the used tampons were wrapped up in when they were thrown away. So now that I know what causes that, I strictly use coke cans as pipes instead.
Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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the voice...
Oh the bike. You had to bring that up didn't you?
Well, I don't have it anymore. I had used it to get back to town and to work you remember? Well after the girlfriend got loose, err I mean after I threw her out, she snuck back with all her friends and trashed my bike.
I found one of the tires in the burn barrel out back, the other tire in the tree across the field. The handlebars were bent all out of shape and the seat was gone.
I would have tried to put it back together and just get a new seat, cuz I got an old milk crate I could've used as a seat, but, well as I already told you, we are all out of duct tape down here.
Oh the bike. You had to bring that up didn't you?
Well, I don't have it anymore. I had used it to get back to town and to work you remember? Well after the girlfriend got loose, err I mean after I threw her out, she snuck back with all her friends and trashed my bike.
I found one of the tires in the burn barrel out back, the other tire in the tree across the field. The handlebars were bent all out of shape and the seat was gone.
I would have tried to put it back together and just get a new seat, cuz I got an old milk crate I could've used as a seat, but, well as I already told you, we are all out of duct tape down here.
Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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voice.....
I knew it would finally come to that. Well I did go looking for one, but they all wanted money up front. I couldn't pay them in cash. I kept looking for help though.
I finally found a lady who would let me charge it to my neighbor's phone bill and then I could just pay him back when he got the bill.
Anyway, she didn't think there was anything wrong with me that a little loving wouldn't help. She even told me when and where I was going to meet the next love of my life. And you know what?
After 4 months of stalking that girl....oops I mean chatting with that girl, she finally agreed to meet me.
My neighbor is still a little mad at me about the phone bill though. He said that I forgot to tell him that I was calling a professional for help, (that lady assured me she was a professional psycho or was that phsycic) either way, I told him that I thought I had told him that it was only 5.99 a minute but I might have forgotten on the count that I was probly stoned when we talked about it. I told him as soon as the box factory picks back up though I would get back to paying him 5.99 a week for the next 853 weeks too.
I knew it would finally come to that. Well I did go looking for one, but they all wanted money up front. I couldn't pay them in cash. I kept looking for help though.
I finally found a lady who would let me charge it to my neighbor's phone bill and then I could just pay him back when he got the bill.
Anyway, she didn't think there was anything wrong with me that a little loving wouldn't help. She even told me when and where I was going to meet the next love of my life. And you know what?
After 4 months of stalking that girl....oops I mean chatting with that girl, she finally agreed to meet me.
My neighbor is still a little mad at me about the phone bill though. He said that I forgot to tell him that I was calling a professional for help, (that lady assured me she was a professional psycho or was that phsycic) either way, I told him that I thought I had told him that it was only 5.99 a minute but I might have forgotten on the count that I was probly stoned when we talked about it. I told him as soon as the box factory picks back up though I would get back to paying him 5.99 a week for the next 853 weeks too.
WOW! You're such a thrill to talk to, not that I'm finally geting more than 5 words form you at a time, I hope I can continue...
Now, please tell me about your Chemo... Did it help? And while I'm on the subject, there were quite a few nay-sayers at Lit, when you thought, I mean brought that up... Anything to say to those people now?
Now, please tell me about your Chemo... Did it help? And while I'm on the subject, there were quite a few nay-sayers at Lit, when you thought, I mean brought that up... Anything to say to those people now?
Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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again..the voice...
I took lessons on chatting while I was gone too.
Well, it didn't help as well as they said it would. I lost all my hair, and had to shave the cat just to get enough to glue back on my head, and I know what you are thinking....gluing is a rather harsh way to keep the rug on the noggin, but we don't have any tape.....
As for those nay sayers....if I didn't have cancer and wasn't so sick, why else would I have stayed away so long. I was too weak to stalk and chat at the same time. Chemo drains ya, and there ain't no way to recoup fast enough between treatments to get up enough strength to do more than one thing at a time.
So for all those who didn't believe me, now you know why I wasn't able to talk about it.
I took lessons on chatting while I was gone too.
Well, it didn't help as well as they said it would. I lost all my hair, and had to shave the cat just to get enough to glue back on my head, and I know what you are thinking....gluing is a rather harsh way to keep the rug on the noggin, but we don't have any tape.....
As for those nay sayers....if I didn't have cancer and wasn't so sick, why else would I have stayed away so long. I was too weak to stalk and chat at the same time. Chemo drains ya, and there ain't no way to recoup fast enough between treatments to get up enough strength to do more than one thing at a time.
So for all those who didn't believe me, now you know why I wasn't able to talk about it.
glamorilla
gorilla your dreams
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who's hkbj?
Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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the voice.....
Oh no....I'd prefer to do it, but can't!
I keep falling and dropping the gum out of my mouth, it gets stuck to my foot, and I try to scrape it all back off so I can keep trying to walk and chew at the same time.
Then just when I get the gum all scraped off and back in my mouth.....YUK I realize that wasn't the gum wad, I had been walking barefoot in the front yard again and that was a little wad left by the cat in the sand box.....damn cats...can't they just find a place to shit where I won't be walking?
Oh no....I'd prefer to do it, but can't!
I keep falling and dropping the gum out of my mouth, it gets stuck to my foot, and I try to scrape it all back off so I can keep trying to walk and chew at the same time.
Then just when I get the gum all scraped off and back in my mouth.....YUK I realize that wasn't the gum wad, I had been walking barefoot in the front yard again and that was a little wad left by the cat in the sand box.....damn cats...can't they just find a place to shit where I won't be walking?
I'm not quite sure I've ever seen you curse here, Hk. I'm shocked!
Tell me about livin' in Tennessee, I've been there before, several times, but never really stayed long enough to know...
Does everyone there really sleep with their family?
Tell me about livin' in Tennessee, I've been there before, several times, but never really stayed long enough to know...
Does everyone there really sleep with their family?
Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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voice....
Well not all of us. Some of us just sleep with our pets and their fleas.
Although, I do remember that my sister told me that my brother was alot smaller than she remembered our uncle being. I told her I thought it was just cuz she was a lot younger then. When you are young, things always seem bigger than they really are.
By the way, you wouldn't by any chance know where I can get a good pig would ya?
Sorry bout the cursing, but have you ever expected juicy fruit and gotten kitty poot instead?
Well not all of us. Some of us just sleep with our pets and their fleas.
Although, I do remember that my sister told me that my brother was alot smaller than she remembered our uncle being. I told her I thought it was just cuz she was a lot younger then. When you are young, things always seem bigger than they really are.
By the way, you wouldn't by any chance know where I can get a good pig would ya?
Sorry bout the cursing, but have you ever expected juicy fruit and gotten kitty poot instead?
I um, love Juicy Fruit, but I can't honestly say I've gotten kitty poot instead.
One last question tonight, and I'll let you go, perhaps we can pick this up again, tomorrow night? I mean if you don't have anything to do...
When your parents move to Dallas, I'm assuming you're going to move with them, is that right? Can I come visit you?
One last question tonight, and I'll let you go, perhaps we can pick this up again, tomorrow night? I mean if you don't have anything to do...
When your parents move to Dallas, I'm assuming you're going to move with them, is that right? Can I come visit you?
Kymberley
I perfected 'BITCHYNESS'
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voice....
Well I guess you can, but I don't think our bed is big enough. Besides, dad has this thing about us sleeping with strangers when mom is in the bed.
But i can ask them.
I have to get to bed tonight. I got a feeling I am going to get lucky
We can chat tomorrow if you like?
Here doggie doggie doggie....daddy's ready for bed now
Well I guess you can, but I don't think our bed is big enough. Besides, dad has this thing about us sleeping with strangers when mom is in the bed.
But i can ask them.
I have to get to bed tonight. I got a feeling I am going to get lucky
We can chat tomorrow if you like?
Here doggie doggie doggie....daddy's ready for bed now
HARDKOREBJ
sweet southern guy
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ha ha he he
very funny guys
very funny guys
