Nuance of the meaning of "MILF"

[John_Vandermeer]

The first thing that comes to my mind is an attractive mother, or even non-mother woman, that is 40-60. Only second do I think of an attractive mother of likely underage children that is 40 or less. In this later group being a mother is imperative for the acronym MILF to apply. And really this second group I think of as "young MILFs" to distinguish from first. Any views, or adjacent acronyms I may not be aware of?

 

[SimonDoom]

I don't think there's a strict age range, necessarily, but I think 40+ is generally right. That's the likely minimum age range of your teenage friend's hot mom. Think Stifler's mom, or the video Stacy's Mom Has Got It Going On. It's a concept more than a clear category.

 

[jsmiam]

I agree with Simon and lean toward the original meaning of the term.

To me:
- Cougar is officially old enough (fifties) to not care what people think.
- MILF - likely forties, late thirties, old enough to be a parent of the admirer’s peer group. (That is/was the origin of the term.)
- Hot mom - anyone pushing a stroller, with Nannies, au pairs, and babysitters at risk of being mistaken for one. And this is where the distinction gets most blurred. One man’s MILF is another man’s Hot mom.

So, like going overboard on body descriptions, going overboard on assigning an exact age might just make certain aged readers become disinterested and go off and find some fan fiction to read instead.

Hmm. A cougar, a milf, and a hot mom walk into a bar. There’s gotta be a joke there somewhere!

 

[EmilyMiller]

The first thing that comes to my mind is an attractive mother, or even non-mother woman, that is 40-60. Only second do I think of an attractive mother of likely underage children that is 40 or less. In this later group being a mother is imperative for the acronym MILF to apply. And really this second group I think of as "young MILFs" to distinguish from first. Any views, or adjacent acronyms I may not be aware of?

Am I alone in not liking this term very much?

[puts on combat helmet and hunkers down]

Em

 

[Zootonius]

Am I alone in not liking this term very much?

[puts on combat helmet and hunkers down]

Em

I'll bite (metaphorically speaking), Why?

 

[EmilyMiller]

I'll bite (metaphorically speaking), Why?

It feels like it’s applied by others.

So I self-describe in my Lit profile as a cumslut. What’s different? Well that’s my choice. I feel like MILF gets applied to people without consent.

I also think there is a silent “still” in there before the “like”. As if having a child (or being a certain age) makes you inherently unfuckable.

Maybe just me.

[puts helmet back on]

Em

 

[Zootonius]

It feels like it’s applied by others.

So I self-describe in my Lit profile as a cumslut. What’s different? Well that’s my choice. I feel like MILF gets applied to people without consent.

Tough to answer. Do you find applying 'sexually attractive' to people in general without their consent, wrong? We do it all the time. Why not older women?

I also think there is a silent “still” in there before the “like”. As if having a child (or being a certain age) makes you inherently unfuckable.

Maybe just me.

[puts helmet back on]

Em

Looking back on my 20 year-old self, few of that type would be called "unfuckable." It just that some are more attractive than others. If an average looking middle-aged woman hit up on my college age self, oh yes!

 

[EmilyMiller]

Tough to answer. Do you find applying 'sexually attractive' to people in general without their consent, wrong? We do it all the time. Why not older women?

Maybe a difference in degree between the two phrases.

Looking back on my 20 year-old self, few of that type would be called "unfuckable." It just that some are more attractive than others. If an average looking middle-aged woman hit up on my college age self, oh yes!

Is there a subtext there?

Would your 20yo send want a MILF as a life partner?

Em

 

[Zootonius]

Maybe a difference in degree between the two phrases.

'sexually attractive' as a polite way of saying 'fuckable', IMO.

Is there a subtext there?

Would your 20yo send want a MILF as a life partner?

Em

Is everyone you find 'fuckable' someone you want as a life partner?

 

[EmilyMiller]

'sexually attractive' as a polite way of saying 'fuckable', IMO.

Being polite is nice.

Is everyone you find 'fuckable' someone you want as a life partner?

No. My point is that the complement of the set MILF in the universe M is MIDWTF. It feels like MILF is the exception, not the rule. No one says Teen I’d Like to Fuck.

Em

 

[Zootonius]

No. My point is that the complement of the set MILF in the universe M is MIDWTF. It feels like MILF is the exception, not the rule. No one says Teen I’d Like to Fuck.

Em

Point taken. But we use euphemisms for other type such as teens (hot, sexy, etc.). I suspect the key is you dislike the word 'fuckable'. Would anther term work, as from Wikipedia, WHIP, which stands for "women who are hot, intelligent and in their prime."

 

[EmilyMiller]

Point taken. But we use euphemisms for other type such as teens (hot, sexy, etc.). I suspect the key is you dislike the word 'fuckable'. Would anther term work, as from Wikipedia, WHIP, which stands for "women who are hot, intelligent and in their prime."

I think it’s more the Mom. And the implication that she might be desperate for the viewer to fuck her.

Em

 

[SimonDoom]

It feels like it’s applied by others.

So I self-describe in my Lit profile as a cumslut. What’s different? Well that’s my choice. I feel like MILF gets applied to people without consent.

I also think there is a silent “still” in there before the “like”. As if having a child (or being a certain age) makes you inherently unfuckable.

Maybe just me.

[puts helmet back on]

Em

Your intuition is belied by the fact that an enormous number of women self-apply the term in online erotica and their profile pages. I think there are a lot of women who enjoy the fact or fantasy of being the hot mom on the soccer field sideline or in the grocery store that's getting looked at by the other dads or by their son's friends.

 

[SimonDoom]

Being polite is nice.

But it doesn't get the motor running.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Your intuition is belied by the fact that an enormous number of women self-apply the term in online erotica and their profile pages. I think there are a lot of women who enjoy the fact or fantasy of being the hot mom on the soccer field sideline or in the grocery store that's getting looked at by the other dads or by their son's friends.

I have no problem with people self-deacribung as anything.

Em

 

[EmilyMiller]

But it doesn't get the motor running.

I find polite guys sexier than assholes. Not fond of bad boys, they tend to to be, well, bad.

Em

 

[djrip]

I think it’s more the Mom. And the implication that she might be desperate for the viewer to fuck her.

Em

I don't think that's the implication at all. The origin of the term is teen boys hot for their friend's mom. She is adult, unattainable. But maybe, this once, she is attainable. Then she is the experience of a lifetime for the young man.

And yes, the default is that the boys don't think of all their friends moms as MILFs, most are just their friends moms, a platonic relationship is expected and assumed. The MILF is the exception because she oozes sex and the boys can't think of anything else around her. She overcomes the usual expectation through overwhelming sexiness.

 

[Zootonius]

I think it’s more the Mom. And the implication that she might be desperate for the viewer to fuck her.

Em

That I think is you're reading too much into it. It's about the guy's thoughts, not who she is.

 

[Zootonius]

Uh oh, @EmilyMiller, tighten your helmet.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I’d be interested to hear something other than male voices TBH.

Em

 

[John_Vandermeer]

I agree with Simon and lean toward the original meaning of the term.

To me:
- Cougar is officially old enough (fifties) to not care what people think.
- MILF - likely forties, late thirties, old enough to be a parent of the admirer’s peer group. (That is/was the origin of the term.)
- Hot mom - anyone pushing a stroller, with Nannies, au pairs, and babysitters at risk of being mistaken for one. And this is where the distinction gets most blurred. One man’s MILF is another man’s Hot mom.

So, like going overboard on body descriptions, going overboard on assigning an exact age might just make certain aged readers become disinterested and go off and find some fan fiction to read instead.

Hmm. A cougar, a milf, and a hot mom walk into a bar. There’s gotta be a joke there somewhere!

I guess thanks for reminding me of the other adjacent terms. I guess the character(s) I am thinking of are closer to "hot mom" than "MILF", though as you said, it is a blurred line and subject to points of view.

 

[yowser]

Interesting that the equivalent FILF doesn't get much mention. (I was going to say 'none' but of course our vast eroto-lit corpus here does list a dozen or so tales.)

Any self-identified FILFs out there who want to weigh in?

 

[alohadave]

Interesting that the equivalent FILF doesn't get much mention. (I was going to say 'none' but of course our vast eroto-lit corpus here does list a dozen or so tales.)

Any self-identified FILFs out there who want to weigh in?

It's usually DILF, if you are referring to father. And it is used, not nearly as much as MILF.

 

[EmilyMiller]

It's usually DILF, if you are referring to father. And it is used, not nearly as much as MILF.

Is that because all Dad’s are assumed to be fuckable? Obviously by nubile teens (related or not). That goes without saying.

Em

 

[Seadog777]

The first thing that comes to my mind is an attractive mother, or even non-mother woman, that is 40-60. Only second do I think of an attractive mother of likely underage children that is 40 or less. In this later group being a mother is imperative for the acronym MILF to apply. And really this second group I think of as "young MILFs" to distinguish from first. Any views, or adjacent acronyms I may not be aware of?

There is no really strict "age limit", in my opinion, when it comes to "MILF".

A WOMAN of "child bearing age" is what I think of.