Letters

[Vilac]

Dearest Major-City Television Sports Commentators,

Please hurry up the end of the NFL football season so that we may be able to concentrate on other professional sports. (Namely Hockey)

I realize this may be just a little out of your control, but you could at least try....couldn't you?

Warmest Regards and may you all be as successful as Scotty Bowman,

V~

 

[amelia]

Dear Vilac:

If you're going to use an ED av, please use a good one. Here are two to choose from.

Your friend,
Amelia

 

[amelia]

PS: number 2

 

[Vilac]

Dearest Amelia,

I appreciate the Ed photos. Unfortunately the second one looks a little too "Slick" and polished for Edward J. Stevens. I do, however like the first one with the funky hair. (Which was the effect I was going for.)

I shall change immediately!

You can be the Carol Vessy to my Ed any day.

Hugs and Kisses,
Ed

 

[amelia]

Dear Math Teacher:

I do not like you. You suck. I miss my old Math Teacher. She was super hot and actually knew how to teach math. You're not fit to lick her boots.

Man, i'd like to see her in her boots again.

You've made an enemy of me!

Amelia

 

[Nora]

Dear Miss Sicky-poo,

I see you are cranky when ill! You need popsicles to bring down your fever and chicken noodle soup just cuz you should have some.

However, you can't have any of those things 'til you go to the Health Center and see a doctor-type person.

With cold virus free huggies and smoochies,

Moi.

 

[amelia]

Dearest Nora:

*cough,cough*

it's to cold to go out. please, must...have..tomato....soup....now.

i'll go to the doctor tomorrow, if i feel like i need to.

with love and phlegm,
Amelia

 

[Eumenides]

Dear Director,

May I please remind you that I am acting in this show and cannot possibly make up for your crew's procrastination.

Huffily Yours,

Diva

 

[Eumenides]

Dear Letter Thread,

My sincerest apologies for your many near death experiences in the occurrence of one of my letters. I do hope that you will forgive me for strangling you and leaving you for the EMT's to resuscitate. Hopefully you are still beating strong and have a great tolerance to electro-shock.

Regretfully Murderous,
Eu

 

[Nora]

Dearest Nora:

*cough,cough*

it's to cold to go out. please, must...have..tomato....soup....now.

i'll go to the doctor tomorrow, if i feel like i need to.

with love and phlegm,
Amelia

Dearest SickyBedelia,

No, no tomato soup. Tomato soup must be made with milk, and milk (as we know) will just add to your phlegm problem. So no.

Broth for you, baby.

You'd better go to the doctor tomorrow or I'll find a vet that makes housecalls and send him out your way.

Love,

Your mean friend.

 

[kidthor]

Dear Amelia,

What'd you do with the pudding? Was it a whole $240 worth? I am strangely aroused at the thought of you with $240 worth of pudding. Did you cook and chill? Do you own a love seat?

Just wondering,
~KID~

 

[amelia]

Dear Amelia,

What'd you do with the pudding? Was it a whole $240 worth? I am strangely aroused at the thought of you with $240 worth of pudding. Did you cook and chill? Do you own a love seat?

Just wondering,
~KID~

Dear Kid:

Shhhhhh....Aw, yeah. Don't worry your pretty little head about it, baby. It ain't your concern. Now if you excuse me, I gotta whisper some sweet nothings to this puddin'.

awwww, yeah!

*giggling*
Amelia

ps: http://www.barryandlevon.com/puddin.html

 

[kidthor]

Dear Kid:

Shhhhhh....Aw, yeah. Don't worry your pretty little head about it, baby. It ain't your concern. Now if you excuse me, I gotta whisper some sweet nothings to this puddin'.

awwww, yeah!

*giggling*
Amelia

ps: http://www.barryandlevon.com/puddin.html

Dear Amelia,

What about the love seat?

~KID~...Virgo

 

[amelia]

Dear Amelia,

What about the love seat?

~KID~...Virgo

Dear Kid Virgo:

I can't find anything about the love seat..but i'll look more later.

Helpfully Yours,
Amelia

 

[zipman]

Miss Amelia,

I just wanted to drop you a letter and wish you the best of luck on Sunday. Despite the fact that the Raider's knocked the Jets out of the playoffs, I will be rooting for them as I do believe the better team won that game.

Sincerely,
A Jets' fan with much to look forward to next year.

Zip

 

[kidthor]

Dear Kid Virgo:

I can't find anything about the love seat..but i'll look more later.

Helpfully Yours,
Amelia

Dear Amelia,

I just wanted to know if you had one. And what you would do with it if you did.

Pervily Yours,
~KID~

 

[amelia]

Miss Amelia,

I just wanted to drop you a letter and wish you the best of luck on Sunday. Despite the fact that the Raider's knocked the Jets out of the playoffs, I will be rooting for them as I do believe the better team won that game.

Sincerely,
A Jets' fan with much to look forward to next year.

Zip

Dear Zippy:

aww, thanks. i'm glad you're going to be rooting for the raidahs. we need all the fan support we can get.



Amelia

PS: Kid: i do not have a love seat, but i'd love to have one.

 

[Vilac]

Dear Fate,

You've royally ass-fucked me today. I don't know what I did to enrage you, but at this point I'd consider sacrificing my puppy to make things right again with us.

Take that under consideration,
V~

 

[amelia]

Dear Fate,

You've royally ass-fucked me today. I don't know what I did to enrage you, but at this point I'd consider sacrificing my puppy to make things right again with us.

Take that under consideration,
V~

Dear V:

Don't do it. I just read about your day and it seems like your puppy is the only good thing going on for you right now.

Hugs,
Amelia

PS: if it makes you feel any better..remember monday when it was 70 degrees and i was bragging? well, we're going through a little cold spell now. we will be lucky to make it to 33 today. take comfort in the fact that we all get ass fucked from time to time.

 

[Vilac]

PS: if it makes you feel any better..remember monday when it was 70 degrees and i was bragging? well, we're going through a little cold spell now. we will be lucky to make it to 33 today. take comfort in the fact that we all get ass fucked from time to time.

Dear Bedilla,

Some assfuckings are better than others. lol

And...33 degrees hmm? That is awfully cold for down there. I'd offer to let you wear my fleece hat but you have one of your own just like mine.

Stay warm, and thanks!
V~

 

[Oscuridad]

Dear Amelia,

Would rather be the one to assfuck you.
Old man winter doesn't deserve such a prize.

Considerably more pleasant than an icicle up the bum,

- O

 

[amelia]

Dear Amelia,

Would rather be the one to assfuck you.
Old man winter doesn't deserve such a prize.

Considerably more pleasant than an icicle up the bum,

- O

Dear Oscuridad:

Lit's the only place in the world you can tell someone you'd like to assfuck them and it be considered a compliment. Thanks!

Waiting,
Amelia

 

[Oscuridad]

Dear Amelia,

You are so right love.

- O

 

[TexasHeat]

To whom it may concern:

If one writes a story and no one responds, is it a failure?

Wondering what's up,

 

[kidthor]

Dear M. Night Shyamalan

Your movies freak me out. You rock.

Heart racingly yours,
~KID~