It's been so long since I've had sex... (add your own punchline.)

[NewOldGuy77]

I forget who gets tied up.

 

[Mtnmike]

The crack of dawn makes me Hard

 

[DuvessaNight]

My “sexy” panties don’t fit anymore.

 

[Polranny]

When I was told I had got a girl into trouble I thought it was because I told her mom she had been smoking

 

[Bdm20]

Her scent on my face is almost gone.

 

[smilekisser]

I forget who gets tied up.

Reminds me of the tv game show - Match Game

 

[NewOldGuy77]

LOVED Gene Rayburn. That dude was wonderfully vulgar!

 

[smilekisser]

LOVED Gene Rayburn. That dude was wonderfully vulgar!

The drinks / alcohol the panel had during the show certainly may have helped
And it was on prime time tv

 

[Mtnmike]

I've been certified as a Born again Virgin

 

[DuvessaNight]

I always say “I’m revirginized”

 

[Bpar721971]

Forgot what a boner felt like!

 

[Trubbycat]

My sperm are going to college.

 

[bill4672a]

I've been without sex for so long that my penis is an innie instead of an outie

 

[Pairaclities]

I havn’t had sex for so long I have a scab near my asshole where my penis used to be.

 

[Passionmissed]

I haven't had sex in so large: my buckskin condom has dried up.

 

[Cherry_Brandy]

It's been so long ago since I had sex, Nelson still had both eyes.

 

[ThatGuyInTheCorner]

... the Lions won the NFL.

 

[Allyfox]

... the Lions won the NFL.

I genuinely laughed at this

 

[DuvessaNight]

It’s been so long since I’ve had some dick, the last time I used a dildo I forgot how to walk for three days.

 

[NewOldGuy77]

It's been so long ago since I had sex, Nelson still had both eyes.

English history high FIVE!!!

 

[WSM98]

...my hymen regenerated.

 

[Trubbycat]

I'd sleep on the wet spot.

 

[maybe_iwill]

284 days without sex, i went for a run wearing flip flops just to remember the sound

 

[WSM98]

284 days without sex, i went for a run wearing flip flops just to remember the sound

If it makes you feel better, you'd have to multiply 365 x a large number to get my total amount of days.

 

[hulmule]

I have to stick my finger in my ass and yell snake to get him to pop out...