Has aging made sex a greater priority?

[LMWM321]

To those near 60 and beyond...

Does knowing you have less road ahead of you than behind affect your interest in sex?

As a younger man I didn’t mind so much when life's bigger priorities - like kids & their school-work, our own careers, our aging parents, etc. - kept my wife and I from having sex because I knew we would eventually get back on track. But as we approach 60 and as each week brings news of yet another friend passing away or having some sort of health crisis, I feel a greater sense of urgency regarding sex. It's as though my marriage has been a magnificent tropical vacation that is two-thirds over and now going just a single day without making love to my wife seems as senseless as not watching the sunset during the last few days at a beautiful resort. It's knowing those are opportunities I'll regret not taking; opportunities I'll never get back.

So often we hear how aging leads to a drop in libido; but for me, it’s actually increasing! And knowing I'm running out of time with the love of my life is the reason...

Anyone else feel this way?

 

[JennyCapricorn]

When I turned 48 my sex drive went into overtime but that I think was more biology than philosophy.

 

[Sgts19]

Married 46 years here so I kind of know what you mean. How much longer am I still be able to have sex? Is it going to be good? Will she still like it?

In my case we still love sex but its not like it used to be. A lot of it is because of the years married, let's face it how many times are you surprised by what you're both are going to do sexually. Been there done that a million times, I'm sure she would agree with me. In our case we have been with other people during the years which spiced things up. Different body types, different ways to fuck, just different. Whenever I was with another lady I couldn't wait to get back and feel my wife's body, I'm into tall thin girls.

I'm in the same boat as you several of my good friends are no longer here. I saw firsthand what they went through and even if they did think of sex they couldn't do it. Do it all while we can you never know about tomorrow.

 

[Sgts19]

One thing I meant to add. When we got married it was at least 2 or 3 times a day now after 46 years its a couple times a week

 

[dobbins1]

So often we read how aging leads to a drop in libido; but for me, it’s actually increasing!

Man, I can relate! 65 here, 42 yrs married. Love my wife dearly and we're still active, but..... Have to admit, I seek more stimulation these days from watching gay porn solo. She hates porn and doesn't know my interests. So unless I decide to cheat on her, I have to scratch my itch!

 

[luckyseven]

I am 67, and my wife is 60. We’ve been married for 40+ years, and sex has been often throughout our marriage. We are both horny as hell, and we love having sex with each other. We are both in excellent shape and active. Most people mistake us for being much younger than we are. If you are in your 20s or even 30s, you likely think of us as old. But when you get to our age, you’ll realise it’s not as old as you think. Don’t smoke. Don’t do drugs. Drink alcohol responsibly. Exercise and eat right. You’ll be healthy and sexually active for a long time!

 

[mrsladybug]

54 years old married for almost 35 years. Finally gotten my hormones under control and he wants nothing to do with me.

 

[Kenrychard]

Oh hell yes. Wife and I divorced 10 years ago. So I have been single Dad, taking care of aging Mom, working, and all the crap the last few years have been because of Covid. Celibate since Nov 11 2014. I haven't even hugged a woman that wasn't related in that whole time. And the last thing I want is to carry to the grave my "LAST" time having sex as it is. That was the night I knew it was over, stayed up all night burning all the marriage momentos, and when she left the next morning( we were separated but trying to work it out, well I was), not able to find me to say goodbye, well that was the last chance she had to talk for the next 5 years. I directed all her calls to the kids. So I am 66, kids adults but we are still a tribe, but I am free to pursue some intimacy. And I can't do it. I want nothing to do with a relationship. I would be OK hiring a professional if this area weren't 90% chance the poor woman is abused, addicted, or traffiked. Well, actually I still would have problem with it, because I would be so embarrassed I would probably just ask her to hang out and talk awhile. LOL. 66. Everything still works, the hormonal drive is gone, but the desire to still be ALIVE is going strong. So yes, age is a big issue. How much longer do I have before its too late? Don't know. But do know its NOT at all about the LAST time being my ex, really, I mean I do hate that. But damn I miss the glow satisfaction and the wide eye surprise when little old toad turns out to be not so bad, not so bad at all, at pleasuring a woman. I really miss the taste of an aroused woman. And at 66 with little time left its on my mind.

 

[Lucien_Al]

To those near 60 and beyond..

Does knowing you have less road ahead than behind affect your interest in sex?

As a younger man I didn’t mind when life's other priorities kept my wife and I from having sex because I knew we would eventually get back on track. But as we approach 60 and as each week brings news of yet another friend passing or having some sort of health crisis, I feel a greater sense of urgency. It's as though my marriage to my wife has been a beautiful tropical vacation and going just a single day without sex is like missing the chance to watch the sunset as the final few days wind down.

So often we read how aging leads to a drop in libido; but for me, it’s actually increasing!

Anyone else?

Definitely agree. I am very conscious about the amount of time left

I don't think we have had a drop in libido but we both dialed it back to 3 - 4 times a week rather than daily but that is more to focus on trying new things, playing out fantasies and lots of toys.

 

[LMWM321]

@Kenrychard and @mrsladybug

Your posts are heartbreaking - I'm so sorry to read you what you're going through. And I hope you get some small measure of satisfaction here at Literotica.

And not to presume such a solution is right for you, but your posts underscore my ardent belief that Sex Work should be legal and normalized here in the US. ...A construction worker who relies on his mobility can pay, without shame, to have a knotted back muscle released by a Physical Therapist but a lonely widow or widower, or anyone who's in a romantic rut who needs occasional physical intimacy to stave off unbearable loneliness can't pay for sex. Fucking stupid. Sex work should be legalized, and normalized and those who do it should be respected just as much as any other therapist.

It's outrageous our culture is fine with people monetizing their talent for brutality in pro sports like NFL Football, Rugby, MMA and Boxing - but NOT ok with other people monetizing their beauty and talent for sexuality. Again, fucking stupid.

And I share your belief @Kenrychard that having paid sex with someone who's been "abused, addicted, or traffiked" would be horrific, but if Sex Work was legitimized that wouldn't necessarily be the case. They could be licensed, bonded, and (hopefully) generously compensated. Would that take the place of sex within a healthy relationship? No, but some might find it HIGHLY preferable to going a very long time without sex.

 

[Lifestyle66]

It's outrageous our culture is fine with people monetizing their talent for brutality in pro sports like NFL Football, Rugby, MMA and Boxing - but NOT ok with other people monetizing their beauty and talent for sexuality. Again, fucking stupid.

Just my opinion from a long-life experience watching people, but I believe the majority of those against legalizing "monetization of sex" are due to men not wanting their wives, girlfriends, or daughters to have that job option, and women not wanting to give up their source of control over their husbands/boyfriends.

 

[drobert44]

To those near 60 and beyond..

Does knowing you have less road ahead than behind affect your interest in sex?

As a younger man I didn’t mind when life's other priorities kept my wife and I from having sex because I knew we would eventually get back on track. But as we approach 60 and as each week brings news of yet another friend passing or having some sort of health crisis, I feel a greater sense of urgency. It's as though my marriage to my wife has been a beautiful tropical vacation and going just a single day without sex is like missing the chance to watch the sunset as the final few days wind down.

So often we read how aging leads to a drop in libido; but for me, it’s actually increasing! And knowing I'm running out of time is the reason...

Anyone else?

Sure has, most women my age dont care for it....

 

[Stoicbutfun]

I think life in general becomes more precious as you become older, or your capacity to savour it to its full. I definitely every sensual act whether it’s food, a walk, friends, sex/ masturbation or similar has and should have a sense that this is it, and I need to give and receive as much as I possibly can. Life is a wonderful gift and I believe it’s all we are given, and we need to make and give as much as we can. Much love x x

 

[UtilityCurve]

To those near 60 and beyond..

Does knowing you have less road ahead than behind affect your interest in sex?

As a younger man I didn’t mind so much when life's other priorities kept my wife and I from having sex because I knew we would eventually get back on track. But as we approach 60 and as each week brings news of yet another friend passing away or having some sort of health crisis, I feel a greater sense of urgency. It's as though my marriage has been like a beautiful tropical vacation and going just a single day without sex with my wife is like missing even one sunset as the final days of our trip wind down.

So often we read how aging leads to a drop in libido; but for me, it’s actually increasing! And knowing I'm running out of time is the reason...

Anyone else?

Yes. Absolutely. You are, in the words of the old sing, "singing my life with your words."

 

[mrsladybug]

One thing I meant to add. When we got married it was at least 2 or 3 times a day now after 46 years its a couple times a week

I would be ok with once a week

 

[LMWM321]

I would be ok with once a week

Just out of curiosity mrsladybug.... Per my post above, would you consider sex with a paid escort - if sex work was totally legal, and normalized? ..Would that provide some measure of satisfaction for you? ..Or perhaps not?

 

[forgotmyantidepressants]

I'm a fair distance from 60 (33), but I could die in car accident or drop dead off a brain aneurism tomorrow, so I think the same logic applies.

My worldview changed dramatically in 2020. All of the fear, confusion, and hostility surrounding covid really made me take a step back and examine what I believed about reality and our institutions of authority.

I don't think I believe in heaven and hell anymore. And if this life is all we get, we may as well make the best of it. In my opinion, "the best of it" is good company, good food, and good sex.

As I approach my inevitable demise, I realize that I want more good sex and deeper personal connections in my life. It's up to me to figure out how to make that happen, but I'm enjoying the process. Even when it gets messy.

 

[mark_j]

I don't know about it being a "priority" so to speak, but after 12 years of nothing, I would like to experience that joy again before I shake off this mortal coil.

 

[LMWM321]

I'm a fair distance from 60 (33), but I could die in car accident or drop dead off a brain aneurism tomorrow, so I think the same logic applies.

My worldview changed dramatically in 2020. All of the fear, confusion, and hostility surrounding covid really made me take a step back and examine what I believed about reality and our institutions of authority.

I don't think I believe in heaven and hell anymore. And if this life is all we get, we may as well make the best of it. In my opinion, "the best of it" is good company, good food, and good sex.

As I approach my inevitable demise, I realize that I want more good sex and deeper personal connections in my life. It's up to me to figure out how to make that happen, but I'm enjoying the process. Even when it gets messy.

Well said! ..I'm glad you weighed in even though you're a "fair distance from 60." ..Many of us wish we saw things as clearly at your age.

 

[Britva415]

Has aging made sex a greater priority?

Not sex specifically, but age has made being decisive about placing my own needs and desires ahead of other people's projections, expectations and bullshit more of a priority.

Sex is one of those areas, and one of the effects has been to stop waiting around for chances and instead go pursue them. Another effect has been to be more ready to just dare to approach people and make my intentions clear. Maturity has improved confidence and largely erased fear of rejection.

 

[mrsladybug]

Just out of curiosity mrsladybug.... Per my post above, would you consider sex with a paid escort - if sex work was totally legal, and normalized? ..Would that provide some measure of satisfaction for you? ..Or perhaps not?

I have only been with one man, and that was on out hon

Just out of curiosity mrsladybug.... Per my post above, would you consider sex with a paid escort - if sex work was totally legal, and normalized? ..Would that provide some measure of satisfaction for you? ..Or perhaps not?

 

[mrsladybug]

On my honeymoon. I would not be comfortable.

 

[LMWM321]

On my honeymoon. I would not be comfortable.

Do you mind elaborating? Bear in mind I'm talking about a hypothetical sex-worker who is licensed & bonded (therefore not someone who's likely to steal from you), takes a credit card (so you don't need to have cash on you or share your venmo ID, etc.), maybe even has credible referrals. Imagine someone who is as trustworthy and respectful - and respected - as your favorite masseuse or physical therapist.

I'm interested in the role that legalized and legitimized sex work could play in helping people deal with loneliness. ..People like widows, widowers, people without a romantic partner, or maybe just people who want an occasional sex partner that is NOT their usual partner.

So, what about paying a sex-worker would make you uncomfortable?

 

[HBuff]

Yes, absolutely. I'm 52 and sex is a lot more present in my mind than when I was in my 20s. The only period I can compare it to now in terms of sense of urgency are my teenage years. I still have sex within my relationship, but the big difference is I'm now much proner to have an affair than I used to. No surprise here, but I need to explain a bit.

I do not actively pursue other women, but when a woman, especially a young one, seems to show interest, then it's a lot more difficult for me to say no than it used to. When it's a very young lady approaching me, I'll be inclined to go like, "Well, this will be my last opportunity". I always nonetheless resisted all offers of sex from other women until March 2022.

At that time, I struck a conversation with a girl who was about 18. Instead of politely taking leave at the end of our conversation, she invited me to the place she shared with a co-tenant (who was absent) for a cup of coffee. It was 2:30 A. M. The reason I was unable to say no is easily explained. Back when I was myself in my teens, I never had full-blown sex and the notion of sex with a teenage girl had always remained in the back of my mind. It was a "first teenage time" that I had been dreaming of for a great many years. It was amazing! Definitely worth it.

 

[Representingmyhotwife]

Does any man desire to be in an online relationship with a 29-year-old married woman? I want to get cucked.