is it possible to be in love with two women at the same time?
- Thread starter maff1981
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JAMESBJOHNSON
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No.
I speak from experience.
If you really love a woman you wont be interested in a another woman.
My bet is you've never been in love.
I speak from experience.
If you really love a woman you wont be interested in a another woman.
My bet is you've never been in love.
Noor
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Loving someone and falling in love is two separate though not always mutually exclusive things.
Yes, you can love your partner and be falling in love with a work interest. Falling in love is often an illusion or fantasy, often it's proximity and familiarity that makes you feel that way.
There is no choice you have to make to see a co-worker everyday, there is usually little conflict and without choice and conflict you are not forced to frequently re-evaluate whether you want to be there.
As to being "in love" with two people, yes, as to loving two people yes, most things are not so black and white.
Yes, you can love your partner and be falling in love with a work interest. Falling in love is often an illusion or fantasy, often it's proximity and familiarity that makes you feel that way.
There is no choice you have to make to see a co-worker everyday, there is usually little conflict and without choice and conflict you are not forced to frequently re-evaluate whether you want to be there.
As to being "in love" with two people, yes, as to loving two people yes, most things are not so black and white.
X
xxamendsxx
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J
JAMESBJOHNSON
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No. Cathouse luv isn't love.
Recidiva
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You can lust for more than one person also.
J
JAMESBJOHNSON
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None of your appetites would surprise me.
Recidiva
Harastal
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They might. I didn't really develop them for your approval.
There is a choice
We don't always work together or at the same time but as we got to know each other better we have made time to talk at work or even arranging breaks together to go for coffee. We enjoy being with each other and think we provide what is missing for each of us in our other relationships. How do you see this ending?
We don't always work together or at the same time but as we got to know each other better we have made time to talk at work or even arranging breaks together to go for coffee. We enjoy being with each other and think we provide what is missing for each of us in our other relationships. How do you see this ending?
Recidiva
Harastal
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Your life, you write the end, or the beginning. None of us here will have enough information to know what's the right thing.
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JAMESBJOHNSON
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Hmmm. I guess you didn't get the memo.
InsatiableDsire
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If we can love more than one child, more than one parent, more than one friend, why can't we love more than one partner?
Bramblethorn
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Yep. Google "polyamory".
It's not a quick fix to anything. Some people aren't suited for polyamory, and even for those who are, it takes a lot of work. But it can be great when it works.
Bramblethorn
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Gotta be careful with that "what is missing for each of us" bit.
I'm a big believer in not expecting one person (partner, guru, whatever) to meet all your emotional needs in life. Poly can work well with that - e.g. one person enjoys BDSM, their spouse isn't into that, they have a partner who is.
But it's not so great when used as a way to avoid dealing with an actual problem in a relationship. The Poly Bingo slogan is "relationship broken, add more people" and it's pretty much guaranteed to lead to a horrible trainwreck. So you probably ought to figure out which of those two applies to your situation... and if you still want to pursue it, talk to your spouse.
Noor
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As friends, if you don't blow it.
subdued_passion
Meh
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Depends on how you define love.
From what you've posted on this thread you're having different experiences with each of the women.
Sometimes I like to pretend I'm in love... its easier than accepting that I'm a slut.
subdued_passion
Meh
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subdued_passion
Meh
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Why, she got new boobs!
We aren't sleeping together. We do have a lot of physical contact, cuddling and touching each other as we pass at work. We don't want anyone to know about us but we have both confided in friends. We have talked about where this is going and she wants as much as I am prepared to give but understansds that I am in a different place to her just now but that I do have genuine feelings for her and I'm not just trying to get laid or i would have done that already.
Noor
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So she is single?
J
JAMESBJOHNSON
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She Doesnt Want You, She Wants Your Job.
She had been in a complicated relationship for a while but its finished now. She is not after my job because we work in different areas. She also comments on how much effort I make to see her and how I go out of my way to spend time with her. She says I treat her different to other peiple have and make her feel special.
