Incompetently Flirt with the Lister Above You

[Coyote100]

I'd lend you my inhaler but you don't seem to be breathing anymore.

 

[verysimplegal]

uh im not good at this. Are you?

 

[Sunlover102]

Hi you are beautiful. You remind me of my mother.

 

[Hodes101]

I look up in the sky and all I see is stars.

I look at you and all I see is Uranus.

 

[LaisDeMarieDeFrance]

Did you poop yourself with excitement when you saw me for the first time?

 

[Bassytian]

Now that I've been to Taco Bell, I shall serenade you through farts... and hopefully only farts!

 

[FistfulOfMyHair]

You had me at Taco Hell.

 

[TheStefanSinadinovicLore]

You had me at you.

 

[Sunlover102]

You sir are a poet but you don't know it.

 

[Bassytian]

Worried about going to Hell? Sit on my lap, and I'll take you straight to Heaven!

 

[Photog1rl]

“Hey baby, do you come here often?”

Looks around and realizes we are at a funeral parlor.

 

[JPReads]

Hey so sorry for your loss... How about a win ?

 

[dawn_of_night]

I come with you, babe....

 

[Sundayschild]

Do you like magnets?

 

[dawn_of_night]

I prefer twistable vacumm pumps

 

[annmsguy]

You’re amazing! I’m going to be in your DM’s all day, every day, about everything because you’re GREAT, and you DESERVE all that attention.

 

[dawn_of_night]

Do you like Pina coladas?

 

[Pad_Foot]

Penis Coladas??

 

[cowslinger64]

Penis Coladas??

Hey baby... nice jugs.

 

[dawn_of_night]

Were you my rodeo clown???

 

[fakingadulthood]

I never knew the dawn of night would take me from 6 to midnight… I’d have thought 8:30 ish this time of year

 

[SusanHoward]

Did you just spill something in your lap?

 

[deft]

Would you like to see my burnt match collection?

 

[fakingadulthood]

How deftly could I…

He said before tripping and falling on his face

 

[ImpishSeraph]

My ex invited me to double date at his mom's, wanna be my date?