I hate being NICE

[MunchinMark]

I'm a nice guy and I hate it.

The other people are the ones who pull in the evenings and have long term realationships. I'm "nice" and no-one considers the possibilty that I may have sexual ideas because of it.

Please, suggestions on how to prevent sexual encounters being the exception rather than the rule.

 

[ANiceGuy]

Keep being nice and have fun too!! hehehe

Don't quit being Nice. I've had relationships with girls that could have posed for playboy (and not had the pictures touched up!). I have been very lucky AND been a Nice Guy all my life. Some of my girl friends had been "raped" by real messed up guys. I was able to help them get over the negatives that left in their attitudes about all guys. Some of my girl friends were "Nice Girls" who loved being naughty in the bedroom.

I suggest you decide what "type" of girl you want to meet and start doing every thing you can to encourage that encounter. Don't wait for her to cum to you. Nice Guys always win although they usually don't know there is a contest!!!

I read about where they did a study of college girls. During the times when the girls were most likely to get pregnant (cycle wise at least even if they used birth control of some type like the pill or condoms) the girls more often than not dated the "macho tuff guys" . During the times when they were not as likely to be fertile they dated "Nicer Guys" who were more likely to settle down and raise a family. The study's conclusion was the girls were in the mode of trying to have children that could take care of them selves if it came to it, but to insure any child would have a stable family they dated the more stable guys. I have way over simplified the study because I don't want to write a ten page missive.

ANiceGuy

 

[goddess_euphoria]

I like nice guys... as long as they're not TOO nice! (I'm sure you know what I mean.) I agree that you should keep being nice, don't try to be someone or something that you're not to try to impress someone, cause then you'll never be happy. (Quite the little philosopher aren't I? )

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[R Nitelight]

Sweets

You are so right. So, how's the weather?
http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/net/boldblue.gif

PS: Sorry, but you're going to have to stick me in the pedestal group. I can't help it.

 

[ANiceGuy]

Your so right CelestialBody

Yeah I guess I consider " a nice guy" as one who treats a girl/woman with respect. Not so much putting her on a pedestal but listens when she says no, maybe or yeah lets.

A "not nice guy" is one who hurts her physically or verbally against her will, treats her like her needs are of no importance to him and does bad things like lies to her. (No of course I'm not fucking your room mate too. She just uses a dildo when I lay next to her and nap. I was moaning in my sleep not with her. That's what you heard when you passed by her room this afternoon. WAS she really calling out my name? I wouldn't know, like I said I was napping.)

Nice guys don't agree with everything she says or does. He is just willing to work with her to give her things she needs to get things he needs too.

I have had several girl friends that were willing to try new things sexually with me that they would not have done in other relationships because we had developed trust. They knew I wan't going to really hurt them even though what we did might cause a little short lived "pain".

If a girl says "Fuck me HARD! Fuck my ass!" she is going to get that just like she wants it. Using all the ways I know not to cause real pain just mutually enjoyable pushing the envelope hot sex!

If a girl says "Be gentl,e I have emotional scars because of a past abusive relationship." I won't do hardly anything unless she lets me know she really really wants it. (Of course I can carress and lick and suck for hours until she lets me know she is ready for more. hehehe)

By Nice Guy I don't mean Shy Guy or Meek Guy that is very different.

 

[MunchinMark]

Niceness in itself is not what bothers me, it's the way you get dismissed because of it.

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[Weird Harold]

Niceness in itself is not what bothers me, it's the way you get dismissed because of it.

Are you talking about the dreaded "I feel so safe with you. You're like the brother I never had."?

 

[Rizla]

Nice guys ought to do better

I consider myself a 'nice guy' almost because I don't get much success. It always seems that people who I wouldn't consider 'nice guys' end up with the 'nice girls', be that intelligent, funny or physically attractive. On the other hand, I can't say that none of the other 'nice guys' I know have not done well there either, so I guess the question is 'why do girls/ladies seem to _prefer_ guys who are not apparently so nice?' Maybe I'm just arrogant, concieted or too self concious to be considered suitable (in the Darwinian sense). Ho hum

 

[Jester]

How about the "your so sweet" line? You know, the one that means that she apparently sees you as a woman friend.

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[ANiceGuy]

NiceGuys win the best prize True respect and real love not just lust.

Nice guys don't focus on the impossibe, they make the negatives work for them.

I have had lots of girls who I had friendships with that I never wanted or expected more. I usually have three to five friendships at any one time. Some are semi casual sex realtionships (In today's AIDS and STD age casual has a total different meaning than it used to.) Some are platonic and will forever remain that. Some are one transitioning to the other. The girls that are just friends are 1) fun to spend a time with. 2) have friends that sometimes become more than friends 3) Tell me things about the girls I'm dating that I would never know otherwise. Platonic relationships don't always remain that way. I had one relationship go hot after ten years. So hang in there.

Dating several girls is fine as long as the girls know somewhat that you have other realtionships. In fact lots of girls would rather have a relationship with guys that have more than one relationship going on. ("If no other girl wants him why should I" she will ask herself) Just be honest with any girl who starts to get serious.



examples:

I met this really hot girl once who had a lot of money and playboy center fold looks. No matter what I did I could not get beyond being just a friend. I brought her name up to another girl friend who knew her better than me. It turned out she had gotten herpes from a real A**H***. She was bi so she focused on her girl/girl relantionships having developed a slight hatred for the male sex. Those guys she did have sex with were more of a revenge thing because she'd have unprotected sex and wouldn't tell them about the herpes. This was a few years ago when there wasn't much that could be done to keep the outbreaks in check. Actually the fact that she kept me as a friend and didn't tease me into hot sex meant she liked me much more than the guys she screwed around with.

More recently I had a girl friend who liked to flirt with other guys around me. I had another couple of girl friends I was having sex with so I didn't really want to go to bed with her especially when I got to know her better. But.... I do have a bit of a voyeur in me. I wrote about us in my Linda's Video Date. In real life I only recorded the sound via a mic in her purse although in the story I taped it.

Linda's Video date will not be posted for three weeks so if I get a request I'll post it here.

Nice Guy (but Not a shy guy)