How would you feel about a man who couldn't get an erection?

[PeterWatson]

Due to a surgical slip, the nerve was cut that facilitates getting an erection so I can have a dry orgasm, but only with a flacid dick. I have not lost feeling in my cock so it loves attention, but it won't get hard. I know I could be a bottom for bi guys, but would anyone enjoy giving head to a guy that can't get more than just slightly stiff? I wonder what my prospects would be as the inability to get a good hardon makes me feel selfconcious about meeting up with another bi guy. Would you be interested in having sex with someone who is serously challenged in the erectile category? Am I worrying too much about this issue?

 

[JessGabriel]

I know you've posted this in GLBT, and you are looking for feedback from something other than a cis woman, but I wanted to throw my two cents in anyway. I love hard dicks...they're great. But they're not everything. My husband has 100% ED and I can still suck him to an orgasm. I still enjoy making him feel good. It just changes what we do slightly. I'm sure there are some out there who it will be a deal-killer for, but it's definitely not going to be for everyone. In my situation, we've recently learned to get more creative and have gone from no sex life to an active one with some fun, creative new additions. My hubby, @GessoOfJess IS a bi guy, so he can respond from a male perspective. Relationships are different from meetups, but I certainly wouldn't let the lack of an erection stop me from meeting someone I was into either.

 

[GessoOfJess]

I echo everything my wife posted. I've spent a long time fighting with those same questions, and between her constant reassurance and things I've read here on other threads, I don't think it's as big of a deal as we think it is. For me, I view sex with my wife as not that dissimilar than 2 lesbians. Clits are just tiny cock heads, so I just treat it like one. You just have to be open to learning new and different things. Accepting the situation is # 1 though, especially when you know it can't be like it used to.

 

[PeterWatson]

Thanks to both JessGabriel and GessoOfJess for your comments and your reassurance. It is great to hear that Gesso has a similar problem and has found satisfaction and acceptance. In my situation, that won't be the case. While I love my spouse, she has no interest in sex and is 'disgusted' by gays, so having a frank discussion with her about my bisexuality would not lead to matrimonial harmony.

I have lived with this secret for a long time, a little afraid of being outed, a little embarrassed about my attraction to hard cocks, and then, after the surgery and the loss of erectile functionality, things seemed even worse. Thank goodness I can still achieve orgasm because if I lost that too, my life would be far less fulfilled. It would be great to have a partner who understood and enjoyed a sexual relationship with her spouse, but you can't have everything in life you want. Through this community, I hope to make friends and maybe fill somewhat of a void in my life.

 

[CuriousTxGuy]

Thanks to both JessGabriel and GessoOfJess for your comments and your reassurance. It is great to hear that Gesso has a similar problem and has found satisfaction and acceptance. In my situation, that won't be the case. While I love my spouse, she has no interest in sex and is 'disgusted' by gays, so having a frank discussion with her about my bisexuality would not lead to matrimonial harmony.

I have lived with this secret for a long time, a little afraid of being outed, a little embarrassed about my attraction to hard cocks, and then, after the surgery and the loss of erectile functionality, things seemed even worse. Thank goodness I can still achieve orgasm because if I lost that too, my life would be far less fulfilled. It would be great to have a partner who understood and enjoyed a sexual relationship with her spouse, but you can't have everything in life you want. Through this community, I hope to make friends and maybe fill somewhat of a void in my life.

There are a lot of older guys who can't get it up that meet to suck cocks no reciprocating needed or wanted. Adult bookstores are full of them. They are found at gloryholes, too. Some of these guys would likely be happy to get you off.

 

[gary04]

Am in idaho and am 70 yrs old there are many days I can not get it hard or only simi. I love to suck small cocks hard or soft they are all fun. My wife still likes to satisfy me even when it's soft and if a guy gives me the opportunity to suck a soft cock I would love to suck it.

 

[Tayloroc]

That’s very sweet of you! It happens to all of us.

 

[betabrad]

This is my problem now too - i am not able to get and maintain an erection and i'm only 58. I'm single and i worry that i'll never be in a relationship with a woman ever again once she realizes i cant have sex anymore. Honestly tho, I've always been bad in bed - coming only after a few strokes and not being able to get it up again. But if maybe I could be in a relationship with a woman again, I would be fine with her taking a lover and giving her the pleasure that I am not able to.

 

[4yourpleasureiam]

Due to a surgical slip, the nerve was cut that facilitates getting an erection so I can have a dry orgasm, but only with a flacid dick. I have not lost feeling in my cock so it loves attention, but it won't get hard. I know I could be a bottom for bi guys, but would anyone enjoy giving head to a guy that can't get more than just slightly stiff? I wonder what my prospects would be as the inability to get a good hardon makes me feel selfconcious about meeting up with another bi guy. Would you be interested in having sex with someone who is serously challenged in the erectile category? Am I worrying too much about this issue?

if we lived in the same town I would be your bottom and thank you for having me.

 

[Bisexguy70]

I have a good buddy who has these issues. Sure i like a good throbbing hard cock. But at the same time you still deserve pleasure. Ive sucked hos flaccid cock, caressed his balls as i gave him a prostate massage. He treats me so well i owe it to him to give him pleasure. Im sure its a difficult thing to get past but some of the hottest pleasure ive experienced is from his sensual touch. Hes rubbed between my asshole with his flaccid dick as he reached around and stroked my cock and nips. I think the fact that your bisexual opens you up to many other acts that you can enjoy. Im 53, im sure my hard cock days are near an end. But i would hope i have a good friend whos willing to see past that and still play with me. Dont be ashamed or self conscious about it. And if i was close id still play with you and we could get naked and pleasure each other.

 

[Wanking_Frank]

I’d totally try to suck a guy off with ED, it is part of my nature to help others in need and there’s a satisfaction that comes from this. I gave head to a guy who was 71 and wasn’t getting any from his wife. I told him it would probably make his relationship with his wife better, he just needed something she wasn’t able or willing to give.

It’s kind of nice to be with someone who doesn’t have hundreds of different sex partners and who appreciates what you’re giving him.

 

[bobbyinhouston]

I’d totally try to suck a guy off with ED, it is part of my nature to help others in need and there’s a satisfaction that comes from this. I gave head to a guy who was 71 and wasn’t getting any from his wife. I told him it would probably make his relationship with his wife better, he just needed something she wasn’t able or willing to give.

It’s kind of nice to be with someone who doesn’t have hundreds of different sex partners and who appreciates what you’re giving him.

I take my hat off to you.

 

[canogagrizz]

Yes you are worrying too much about this issue.
I think it's important note here that most guys with ED that don't get erections can still feel the same exact pleasure & still can cum. BJ, etc. feels as good as it ever did in the past even without a maintained erection.
I would imagine for many guys this could be a problem with their wives. Especially if their wives want it. Thus they have Viarga and other meds for that.
in regards to other guys & if they care or not, I don't think most care or are not bothered by a older guy who has ED. Most know the guy with ED is loving it regardless of not having an erection. I mean I wouldn't. I've always had a 5-6in at best when erect so imo my dick has always been on the small side. In regards to other males I prefer the same. Big dicks never turned me on. So a guy with ED would actually for me be a huge turn on. Especially when they would cum. I think this would be even more of a turn on for other guys giving oral. I think most guys understand ED & are way more excepting of it and don't mind a limp dick at all. Especially if they have usually been bi or gay. They especially already know this when it comes to older guys and that being the case with ED when a guy is say 58yrs & older. So no I don't think it bothers other guys the ED problem. Unless they care more about getting anally penetrated.
And much thanks to people like JessGabriel and Wanking_Frank for their understanding & not caring about it. They know a ED person is still being pleasured and that is what gets them off as well. Us older ED guys are truly grateful for these types that get it & give it.

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[Nightspeed]

As someone with ED, this thread is encouraging.

 

[Samantha47]

Am in idaho and am 70 yrs old there are many days I can not get it hard or only simi. I love to suck small cocks hard or soft they are all fun. My wife still likes to satisfy me even when it's soft and if a guy gives me the opportunity to suck a soft cock I would love to suck it.

I'd love you to

 

[Clintdear]

Due to a surgical slip, the nerve was cut that facilitates getting an erection so I can have a dry orgasm, but only with a flacid dick. I have not lost feeling in my cock so it loves attention, but it won't get hard. I know I could be a bottom for bi guys, but would anyone enjoy giving head to a guy that can't get more than just slightly stiff? I wonder what my prospects would be as the inability to get a good hardon makes me feel selfconcious about meeting up with another bi guy. Would you be interested in having sex with someone who is serously challenged in the erectile category? Am I worrying too much about this issue?

You might try talking to you doctor about Tri-Mix. It may not be what he presecribes, but he'll know what you are after.

 

[mtsnowrider]

Due to a surgical slip, the nerve was cut that facilitates getting an erection so I can have a dry orgasm, but only with a flacid dick. I have not lost feeling in my cock so it loves attention, but it won't get hard. I know I could be a bottom for bi guys, but would anyone enjoy giving head to a guy that can't get more than just slightly stiff? I wonder what my prospects would be as the inability to get a good hardon makes me feel selfconcious about meeting up with another bi guy. Would you be interested in having sex with someone who is serously challenged in the erectile category? Am I worrying too much about this issue?

And worrying about it makes it worse. Being overly anxious makes it more difficult to get and stay hard. Its the "fight or flight" phenomenon

 

[Filipinawife]

A challenge

 

[BrokenQuill]

Personally I like the act of sucking a cock, no matter if its soft or hard to start with. I enjoy the sensation of a flaccid cock in my mouth and would be happy to oblige (if you werent so far away). To me its all about sharing pleasures.

 

[vizio]

I've been with a man that was unable to achieve an erection. But it was so much fun sucking him just the same. Even though it didn't get hard it still felt good to him.

 

[easyoff]

They still enjoy being sucked

 

[SomaSlave]

I'm a Pleasure Giver, not a Pleasure Receiver. What that means, simply, is that my only focus is the person to whom I'm providing pleasure. While I love a mouthful of cum, that's not a prerequisite for offering my mouth to a man. The important thing is setting expectations: let your partner know that failure to ejaculate does not represent a failure on their part (or yours, for that matter). I suspect that you will not only enjoy a good sensual blowjob, but also a round of body worship. I have yet to find a man who doesn't appreciate a nice bit of foot worship...I'll bet you're one of them.

 

[Gengen0806]

I guess it depends on my feeling. But definitely recommend to buy pills for that lol at Canadian Pharmacy. I guess it is kinda a problem and need to be seen and consulted by doctor. But If that man was shy or whatever so better form him would to buy pills!

 

[Beholders_Eye]

This is my solution to the problem:

This vacuum penis pump and cock rings have worked well for me for several years now. Be glad to discuss details in p.m.

There is also a good web site for men with E.D.: franktalk.org.

 

[canogagrizz]

https://www.fleshlight.com/products/quickshot-launchThis was my solution to my ED. My small flaccid cock fits in this every time and it goes to town on me making me fully erect again. Best massager ever invented so worth the couple hundred bucks. I can edge for well over a half hour with this thing.