How To Kill A Date In Four Words...

[Hypoxia]

Doctors say it's intermittent.

 

[EddieTheBastard]

Your sister always swallows

"Can my parents watch" wouldn't go down all that well either



https://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=4651310&page=submissions

 

[Hypoxia]

Fido's just being playful.

 

[Jada59]

I have a knife.

 

[CuteSlaveLisa]

I voted for Trump.

The late great George Carlin said he liked (to fuck) girls with tattoos because having a tattoo showed that they could make really bad and really permanent choices (to whit fucking him).

The old joke is that the hillbilly entered his gal from behind and said..

"Your sister (mom, brother, father, dog, hamster) liked this"...

Then held on for dear life.

Love and Kisses

Lisa Ann

 

[R. Richard]

Is that your husband?

 

[Hypoxia]

Can you stop screaming?

 

[Kantarii]

Who was calling you?
Kant

 

[Handley_Page]

Have you any penicillin ?

 

[SweetWitch]

Wanna build a wall?

 

[CuteSlaveLisa]

(As he/she checks the number on the ringing cell phone.)

It's my parole officer...

 

[PaxNurgle]

For me it's...

"...wanna do a line?"

(How about NO!)

or,

"Make America Great Again!"
(HOW??? probably not with your dystopian vision of it...)

or,

"I don't like...(insert ethnic group or classification of people here)"
(well, I don't like bigots.)

And the biggest one...

"My boyfriend's in jail."
(if your date ever tells you this, run away from her as fast as you can. Chances are she will NOT be your type!)

 

[Jada59]

Do I seem weird?

 

[Hypoxia]

Pay me first, sugar.

 

[Jada59]

You have money, right?

 

[Hereforfun68]

I have a micropenis

 

[Jada59]

I need to barf.

 

[Hereforfun68]

You need more make-up

 

[Jada59]

Wear matching outfits!

 

[kittybeaver]

Straight people are oppressed

 

[Hereforfun68]

Ever douched with acetone?

 

[Handley_Page]

Ever douched with acetone?

Taken your pills today ?