How Much of Yourself Do You Pour into a Relationship?

[juicylips]

I could do a poll, but I dislike them. But if you had a ratio to compare it to...say 60/40 or 50/50, etc. How much do you feel you give towards making a relationship work?

Friendships as well as romantic ones.

Do you redouble your efforts if you feel the relationship shifting or changing? (For the worse)

Do you handle your online relationships different than those in real life?

Tell me.
jl

 

[christcat69]

I always give 100% of myself in any situation.
It's what everyone should give, there would be so much more substance in the world.

 

[juicylips]

I always give 100% of myself in any situation.
It's what everyone should give, there would be so much more substance in the world.

Nicely said.

 

[teddybear4play]

All of myself. If you hold things back, it can't, technically, be a relationship.

TB4p

 

[Spinaroonie]

8 fluid ounces.

 

[Darkthought]

I used to pour quite a lot of me in, but got sick of one-way relationships. Now I keep it casual. Less work, more play.

 

[PepperminTrish]

I could do a poll, but I dislike them. But if you had a ratio to compare it to...say 60/40 or 50/50, etc. How much do you feel you give towards making a relationship work?

Friendships as well as romantic ones.

Do you redouble your efforts if you feel the relationship shifting or changing? (For the worse)

Do you handle your online relationships different than those in real life?

Tell me.
jl

I'd like to think that I give 100% of myself but I don't think that's accurate. I have my own hang ups and 'issues' that sometimes make me feel as if I'm giving less of myself than I should be giving. That goes for friendships and/or romantic relationships. I often feel like I get more than I give and I'm trying to correct that as best I can.

I tend to panic and think the worse when things shift and I have a tendency to assume the shifts/changes are for the worst. At times, it's just a natural progression and I end up reading too much into it all.

Online is only different because of not being able to be with that person. I can't give the hug or the shoulder to lean on like I may want to so I have to rely on my words to do that for me. The feelings are still the same though.

 

[juicylips]

I used to pour quite a lot of me in, but got sick of one-way relationships. Now I keep it casual. Less work, more play.

Also nicely said. I see your point.

 

[Guest]

I could do a poll, but I dislike them. But if you had a ratio to compare it to...say 60/40 or 50/50, etc. How much do you feel you give towards making a relationship work?
<---------------------------This much----------------------------->

Friendships as well as romantic ones.

Do you redouble your efforts if you feel the relationship shifting or changing? (For the worse)
Consistancy is my game.

Do you handle your online relationships different than those in real life?
No, because my on-line relationships are mostly with bots.

Tell me.
Told 'ya.
[/B]

 

[juicylips]

8 fluid ounces.

Yea..but you're suppose to drink 8 of those a day.

 

[Guest]

for me...its all or nothing.

 

[juicylips]

Re: Re: How Much of Yourself Do You Pour into a Relationship?

I tend to panic and think the worse when things shift and I have a tendency to assume the shifts/changes are for the worst. At times, it's just a natural progression and I end up reading too much into it all.

You know we are twins about this very thing.

I gotta be in control. Just have to know where I'm going and what is waiting for me there. Drives me totally bonkers if I don't.

 

[Willing and Unsure]

I try. I used to give 100% and I got hurt very badly then. now I give as much as the other person is willing to give. and if they dont want to give that much, then fine, I wont either and it will fall apart.

 

[juicylips]

I try. I used to give 100% and I got hurt very badly then. now I give as much as the other person is willing to give. and if they dont want to give that much, then fine, I wont either and it will fall apart.

It's hard to gauge how much that other person is investing though, isn't it? Especially in the beginning.

Hugggggs

 

[juicylips]

All of myself. If you hold things back, it can't, technically, be a relationship.

TB4p

It can't?

Or it just can't be an honest one?

 

[Guest]

ok revising my earlier answer.

In relationships...I believe you give it your all... and if it doesn't work...they can't say you didn't try.

as for friendships. There is one friendship that I give 100% in...and thats because she has proven that she wants the friendship. Every other one...I hold back. Too many people want to get close to you for the wrong reasons... and I like to be the one holding the cards.

 

[juicylips]

Every other one...I hold back. Too many people want to get close to you for the wrong reasons... and I like to be the one holding the cards.

Control freak.

 

[Willing and Unsure]

It's hard to gauge how much that other person is investing though, isn't it? Especially in the beginning.

Hugggggs

in the beginning I give more, but once I start to get to know the person better, I back off some depending on how much they are willing to give.

 

[Rambrat]

I could do a poll, but I dislike them. But if you had a ratio to compare it to...say 60/40 or 50/50, etc. How much do you feel you give towards making a relationship work?

Friendships as well as romantic ones.

Do you redouble your efforts if you feel the relationship shifting or changing? (For the worse)

Do you handle your online relationships different than those in real life?

Tell me.
jl

I'd say about 70/30 in a relationship...

and since all my on-line relationships end in death...I'd say that's more like 100/0.

 

[juicylips]

Re: Re: How Much of Yourself Do You Pour into a Relationship?

and since all my on-line relationships end in death...I'd say that's more like 100/0.

*Coffeespew*

 

[teddybear4play]

It can't?

Or it just can't be an honest one?

Well, yeah. But can a relationship in which one person is being dishonest even be called a "relationship"? A relationship takes two people giving of themselves.

TB4p

 

[Guest]

Control freak.

LOL sometimes yes

 

[takingchances42]

So, you're like dating someone, and all of a sudden this magical day comes and it is a Relationship? And from that day forward, you are to be twined together giving all of yourselves to each other endlessly?

Sounds good, and some people do it that way. Which is a good way to make major mistakes. Keeping it fun and natural is the way to go in my opinion. If the natural path for each of you, is to bond closer and closer, then nurture it and let the relationship develop at its own pace, and find its own character...

But this standard relationship expectations, black and white, it is this way or not at all bothers me. Each relationship is unique, there are no rules.

 

[sheath]

I usually keep myself pretty reserved...

...at first. As the friendship grows and time moves on, I give more. When it gets to a point where I can imagine that person in my life when I'm old and gray, then I am ready and willing to give more.

Of course, when I fall in love, I give my all. I think that love deserves nothing less.

S.

 

[ma_guy]

I'd say it's a gradual thing. At first maybe 5%. As things progress that number moves up the scale. There might be a total of 5 people that I could say I'd put 100% into a relationship with in my entire life. There are probably 100 people where I'd say 50% and thousands at the 5% level.