"How Desperate Housewives Is Castrating Us All" (a bit of humor and a bit of truth)

phoenix1224 said:
Wow... I really didn't think that this thread would go on for so long.

See what happens when you walk away from the computer for a while? :p




There was a reason why I posted this article AND the other one ("The Bigger, the Better").

The other article talked about the pressures put on women... You MUST be pretty/skinny... But that's really the only pressures the main stream puts on them... Besides being totally crass.

Let's face it... Us guys could care less if you ladies have a BA or a PhD... We could care less if you can fix a car, clogged drain, etc. We could care less if you know about fashion... We could care less if you know about fancy/expensive foods... Etc., etc., etc.

However, society as a whole puts a-whole-nother set of pressures on men... Not only do us men have the pressures of having to be hansome/fit (just look at all the male models in magazines these days), but we are ALSO supposed to be socially sophisticated (know about fashion, know what the five different forks in front of us is for, be overlt groomed, etc.), be well-educated, be somewhat well-off financially, be 'sensitive', AND still somehow hold on to our 'masculinity'.

Many guys feel as if they have to walk some sort of tight-rope through life... Balancing, dangerously, to avoid going too far in any one direction... As to not be considered either a total neanderthal or a complete wuss.

And, you have to admit, there IS an alarming trend in the media (especially in sitcoms) to make men look foolish... Just think of all of them... 'Malcolm in the Middle', 'About Jim', 'Married With Children'- the list can go on and on and on- that show the main male character to be gross and incompetent... And, sometimes, even a drunk.

But think of the very few shows that have done the same in regards to the main FEMALE character... The only one that I can think of off-hand (and the show STILL didn't portray her as being gross... or a drunk) is 'I Love Lucy'.

Many men are left feeling both angry and confused.
Yup, all very true.

How many women are going to protest about men being portrayed as idiots? You can find 'em, but not among the female pundits. Hell, try and find someone who doesn't think all men are idiots. You can find 'em, for sure - but again, not in any position of power.

Then again, women are more often than not portrayed as sluts. Dressed up as sluts. In the streets you see little girls wearing sexually provocative clothes because practically speaking that's all that is being sold. Women as property or mere objects, that's the cross women in the media have to bear.

Everyone is being exploited and yet everyone is against each other. The truth of it all is, throwing out the raw meat of hatred is how the power elite keeps us divided. Hatred of someone else energizes people and it's a big money maker. Jerry Springer proved that much.


If we're too blinded by the reflections off the swords we raise against each other
and deafened by the clanging of verbal weapons

we can't hear or see who's really castrating us.
 
Stuponfucious said:
*swats your ass with the cane* Quiet! I ask the questions here.

You know, you've been very naughty lately, strutting around in this new uniform...you know it's not obeying the dress code don't you? *swats your ass again, harder this time*

This skirt is too short and your tight, young ass hangs out all the time, teasing all the men around here... *swats yet again, in the same spot, your ass beginning to develop beautiful red streaks*

And these white stockings aren't suppsoed to be worn at all! *Swats again and again* and flashing your navel under this short blouse is just unacceptable *swats several times mroe in quick succession, and you begin to sob*

What do you have to say for yourself, you harlot?

lol! hahaha!

Well (clears throat)
---------------------
"I ain't no harlert sir, jus coz I dun need a bra or such other contraptions I ain't never be readin' about in the bible, and jus coz my ass hangs out an' makes some of them men wanna touch it and I ain't about to start wearing panties, I don't see why you's punish me, you's a bad man! My ass hurts bad, but oooh" she descended into sobs and whimpers "feels sooo good and hot...but I ain't never gonna be able to sit down." (rotates my comely butt cheeks, the black skirt now having shrivelled around my waist like a belt.)
I look you in the eye, you have a mean look, the stick quivering in your hand,
" At least I wear stockins sir, to cover my legs up some."

------

Stuperthingy, your pants are on fire :catroar:
 
LovingTongue said:
Yup, all very true.

How many women are going to protest about men being portrayed as idiots? You can find 'em, but not among the female pundits. Hell, try and find someone who doesn't think all men are idiots. You can find 'em, for sure - but again, not in any position of power.

Then again, women are more often than not portrayed as sluts. Dressed up as sluts. In the streets you see little girls wearing sexually provocative clothes because practically speaking that's all that is being sold. Women as property or mere objects, that's the cross women in the media have to bear.

Everyone is being exploited and yet everyone is against each other. The truth of it all is, throwing out the raw meat of hatred is how the power elite keeps us divided. Hatred of someone else energizes people and it's a big money maker. Jerry Springer proved that much.


If we're too blinded by the reflections off the swords we raise against each other
and deafened by the clanging of verbal weapons

we can't hear or see who's really castrating us.

I think Hitler proved it long before Springer did.
 
LovingTongue said:
Yup, all very true.

How many women are going to protest about men being portrayed as idiots? You can find 'em, but not among the female pundits. Hell, try and find someone who doesn't think all men are idiots. You can find 'em, for sure - but again, not in any position of power.

Then again, women are more often than not portrayed as sluts. Dressed up as sluts. In the streets you see little girls wearing sexually provocative clothes because practically speaking that's all that is being sold. Women as property or mere objects, that's the cross women in the media have to bear.

Everyone is being exploited and yet everyone is against each other. The truth of it all is, throwing out the raw meat of hatred is how the power elite keeps us divided. Hatred of someone else energizes people and it's a big money maker. Jerry Springer proved that much.


If we're too blinded by the reflections off the swords we raise against each other
and deafened by the clanging of verbal weapons

we can't hear or see who's really castrating us.
I couldn't agree more.
 
LovingTongue said:
Yup, all very true.

How many women are going to protest about men being portrayed as idiots? You can find 'em, but not among the female pundits. Hell, try and find someone who doesn't think all men are idiots. You can find 'em, for sure - but again, not in any position of power.

Then again, women are more often than not portrayed as sluts. Dressed up as sluts. In the streets you see little girls wearing sexually provocative clothes because practically speaking that's all that is being sold. Women as property or mere objects, that's the cross women in the media have to bear.

Everyone is being exploited and yet everyone is against each other. The truth of it all is, throwing out the raw meat of hatred is how the power elite keeps us divided. Hatred of someone else energizes people and it's a big money maker. Jerry Springer proved that much.


If we're too blinded by the reflections off the swords we raise against each other
and deafened by the clanging of verbal weapons

we can't hear or see who's really castrating us.


And yet you throw out the raw meat of hatred every chance you get for no apparent reason other than you like to cause dissension. A lot of people here agree with me and YOU know it too. And yeah I took you off iggy because I need a laugh every now and again, and since you are so hysterical....

Now come on "Book", tell me how you did it to me because you found me wanting in some way. LOL thats what I'm going to start calling you, Book, because you are so readable.
 
stingray61 said:
Ok just so long as I know not to take you seriously. :cool:

Oh no you must.

I am a bowlful of serious.

If you want my true opinion- I still feel women haven't obtained full rights in the work place, particularly in areas such as politics. They are less likely to be envisaged as charismatic leaders, and often, it is still women who mimick the aggressiveness of men who get out on top.

However, I also believe in the home, in the family, men are discriminated against being able to be seen as equal participants in child rearing, equal participants in needing respect. This is displayed in custody cases, or cases involving violence.

If they increased mens rights within the family (e.g. paternity leave, being able to stay of work when their child was sick, etc) then it will free women up to achieve what they want to in the workplace anyway.,
 
stingray61 said:
And yet you throw out the raw meat of hatred every chance you get for no apparent reason other than you like to cause dissension. A lot of people here agree with me and YOU know it too.
Name me one person who agrees with you. You come on here babbling nonsense about how people who don't serve are cowards and how white traditional women can't speak up for themselves and all that bs.

Check out what people think of what you said: https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=317263

Notice how 18 of 26 votes has you pegged as a babbling retard or worse? That's a two fold rise from last night when I posted it.

I'm gonna re bump it a few hours from now hahahahah
 
GirlMidnite said:
Oh no you must.

I am a bowlful of serious.

If you want my true opinion- I still feel women haven't obtained full rights in the work place, particularly in areas such as politics. They are less likely to be envisaged as charismatic leaders, and often, it is still women who mimick the aggressiveness of men who get out on top.

However, I also believe in the home, in the family, men are discriminated against being able to be seen as equal participants in child rearing, equal participants in needing respect. This is displayed in custody cases, or cases involving violence.

If they increased mens rights within the family (e.g. paternity leave, being able to stay of work when their child was sick, etc) then it will free women up to achieve what they want to in the workplace anyway.,
He thinks because you're playful, you can't be serious. I used to think shit like that too. A [/i]looooooooong time ago[/i], back in my teens. The playful girl sometimes packs an intellectual whallop in her purse...
 
GirlMidnite said:
lol! hahaha!

Well (clears throat)
---------------------
"I ain't no harlert sir, jus coz I dun need a bra or such other contraptions I ain't never be readin' about in the bible, and jus coz my ass hangs out an' makes some of them men wanna touch it and I ain't about to start wearing panties, I don't see why you's punish me, you's a bad man! My ass hurts bad, but oooh" she descended into sobs and whimpers "feels sooo good and hot...but I ain't never gonna be able to sit down." (rotates my comely butt cheeks, the black skirt now having shrivelled around my waist like a belt.)
I look you in the eye, you have a mean look, the stick quivering in your hand,
" At least I wear stockins sir, to cover my legs up some."

oh, but that's the thing. You're covering up your legs, but that's such a tease. We can still see your soft, tender skin through the nylon.

So you like it, hmm? *drops the cane with a clatter, and bends over you, rubs the crotch of your thong panties...*

Oh my, you DO like this, you masochistic little slut! Ypu're all wet here...

*slips your panties off and slowly inhales your your sweet scent, puts them in my pocket*

I'm going to keep these, as a souvenir. besides, thong panties don't match the dress code either...

*slowly rubs and kisses your tender, red ass, you moan*

Let's see how you like this...

*I raise up, unzip my fly and take out my already ahrd cock, spreading your ass cheeks and lining it up with your tender, tight pussy, I whisper in your ear*

You want this, don't you? Tell mehow much you want it, beg me for it!

Stuperthingy, your pants are on fire :catroar:

How's that?
 
Stuponfucious said:
oh, but that's the thing. You're covering up your legs, but that's such a tease. We can still see your soft, tender skin through the nylon.

So you like it, hmm? *drops the cane with a clatter, and bends over you, rubs the crotch of your thong panties...*

Oh my, you DO like this, you masochistic little slut! Ypu're all wet here...

*slips your panties off and slowly inhales your your sweet scent, puts them in my pocket*

I'm going to keep these, as a souvenir. besides, thong panties don't match the dress code either...

*slowly rubs and kisses your tender, red ass, you moan*

Let's see how you like this...

*I raise up, unzip my fly and take out my already ahrd cock, spreading your ass cheeks and lining it up with your tender, tight pussy, I whisper in your ear*

You want this, don't you? Tell mehow much you want it, beg me for it!


How's that?

hm, do you write erotic stories? You should.

-------

"Oooh sir, I can feel your cock head bulging into my pussy hole, please sir...." I try to push myself onto you but you retreat, in frustration I grind my ass onto your cock, impaling myself, "yess...I am a masochistic slut....and I love to tease my strictest teachers sir, so when they go home and their fuckin themselves or their girlfriends, they cum sooo hard..." , I feel the cane descent on my tender reddened bottom, I scream and contract around you and your throbbing hard...
-------

Look, now you have corrupted my innocence and I am one of the ruined urchins of Literotica. Shame on yourself, :devil:
 
GirlMidnite said:
hm, do you write erotic stories? You should.

I've only written one so far, submitted to Lit under a differnt name. I've been thinking of submitting more under yet another pseudonym.

"Oooh sir, I can feel your cock head bulging into my pussy hole, please sir...." I try to push myself onto you but you retreat, in frustration I grind my ass onto your cock, impaling myself, "yess...I am a masochistic slut....and I love to tease my strictest teachers sir, so when they go home and their fuckin themselves or their girlfriends, they cum sooo hard..." , I feel the cane descent on my tender reddened bottom, I scream and contract around you and your throbbing hard...

Mmm yes, I love to think of my sexiest students while I fuck my girlfriend *SWAT* Ahhh...! Sometimes she even dresses up in a uniform a lot like this one. She rather enjoys playing the sweet, innocent little girl as I molest her... *SWAT* Mmm, your fuckhole is so tight! How can you be such a slut and yet be so tight? Do you do special excercises? *SWAT* Oh FUCK, I'm going to come soon. Where do you want my juice, huh? tell me, cumslut! You want it in your fuckhole or do you want to drink my cum, hmm? *SWAT*

Look, now you have corrupted my innocence and I am one of the ruined urchins of Literotica. Shame on yourself, :devil:

Oh, that's the best part though, I'm shameless...

And so are you, my sexy little slut. ;)
 
Stuponfucious said:
I've only written one so far, submitted to Lit under a differnt name. I've been thinking of submitting more under yet another pseudonym.



Mmm yes, I love to think of my sexiest students while I fuck my girlfriend *SWAT* Ahhh...! Sometimes she even dresses up in a uniform a lot like this one. She rather enjoys playing the sweet, innocent little girl as I molest her... *SWAT* Mmm, your fuckhole is so tight! How can you be such a slut and yet be so tight? Do you do special excercises? *SWAT* Oh FUCK, I'm going to come soon. Where do you want my juice, huh? tell me, cumslut! You want it in your fuckhole or do you want to drink my cum, hmm? *SWAT*



Oh, that's the best part though, I'm shameless...

And so are you, my sexy little slut. ;)

I ain't got no game for shame.

-------------
I widen my eyes, and slowly part my red, moist lips and let my tongue creep over my white teeth, as if to suggest I would like my thirst to be quenched...
-------------

FYI, I am a big fan of special exercises (wink nudge.)

:nana:
 
stingray61 said:
malice would imply an intent to do harm either physically or emotionally. Questioning LT's intelligence does neither.

really...
and yet you said we don't have a right to call other people stupid, did you not?
you don't think LT has feelings?
seems rather hypocritical of you, really.
 
Catherine Zeta-Jones / Susan Misner / Deidre Goodwin - Cell Block Tango Lyrics



[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!

[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!

[ANNOUNCER]
And now the six merry murderesses of the Crookem County Jail in their rendition of "The Cell Block Tango"

[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!
(4X)

[ALL]
He had it coming
He had it coming
He only had himself to blame
If you'd have been there
If you'd have seen it

[VELMA]
I betcha you would have done the same!

[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!
(2X)

[LIZ (Spoken)]
You know how people
have these little habits
That get you down. Like Bernie.
Bernie like to chew gum.
No, not chew. POP. So I came home this one day,
And I am really irritated, and
looking for a little sympathy
and there's Bernie layin'
on the couch, drinkin' a beer
and chewin'. No, not chewin'.
Poppin'. So, I said to him,
I said, "You pop that
gum one more time..."
and he did.
So I took the shotgun off the wall
and I fired two warning shots...
...into his head.

[ALL]
He had it coming
He had it coming
He only had himself to blame
If you'd have been there
If you'd have heard it
I betcha you would
Have dome the same!

[ANNIE (Spoken)]
I met Ezekiel Young from
Salt Lake city about two years ago
and he told me he was single
and we hit it off right away.
So, we started living together.
He'd go to work, he'd come home, I'd
fix him a drink, We'd have dinner.
And then I found out,
"Single" he told me?
Single, my ass. Not only
was he married
...oh, no, he had six wives.
One of those Mormons, you know. So that
night, when he came home, I fixed him
his drink as usual.
You know, some guys just can't hold
their arsenic.

[ALL]
He had it coming
He had it coming
He took a flower
In its prime
And then he used it
And he abused it
It was a murder
But not a crime!

[JUNE (Spoken)]
Now, I'm standing in the kitchen
carvin' up the chicken for dinner,
minding my own business,
and in storms my husband Wilbur,
in a jealous rage.
"You been screwin' the milkman,"
he says. He was crazy
and he kept screamin',
"you been screwin the milkman."
And then he ran into my knife.
He ran into my knife ten times!

[ALL]
If you'd have been there
If you'd have seen it
I betcha you would have done the same!

[HUNYAK (Spoken in Hungarian)]
Mit kersek, en itt? Azt mondjok, hogy a hires lakem lefogta a ferjemet en meg
lecsaptam a fejet. De nem igaz, en artatlan
vagyok. Nem tudom mert mondja
Uncle Sam hogy en tettem. probaltam
a rendorsegen megmayarazni de nem ertettek meg...

[JUNE (Spoken)]
Yeah, but di you do it?

[HUNYAK]
UH UH, not guilty!

[VELMA]
My sister, Veronica and
I did this double act
and my husband, Charlie,
used to travel round with us.
Now, for the last number in our act,
we did these 20 acrobatic tricks in a row
One,two,three,four,five...splits, spread eagles,
back flips,flip flops, one right after the other.
So this one night before the show we're down at the hotel Cicero,the three of us,boozin', havin' a few laughs and
we ran out of ice, so I go out to get some.
I come back, open the door, and there's Veronica and
Charlie doing Number Seventeen the spread eagle.
Well, I was in such a state of shock,
I completely blacked out. I can't remember a thing.
It wasn't until later,
when I was washing the blood off my hands
I even knew they were dead.

[VELMA]
They had it coming
[GIRLS]
They had it coming
[VELMA]
They had it coming
[GIRLS]
They had it coming
[VELMA]
They had it coming all along
[GIRLS]
They had it coming all along
[VELMA]
I didn't do it
[GIRLS]
She didn't do it
[VELMA]
But if I done it
[GIRLS]
But if she done it
[VELMA]
How could you tell me that I was wrong?

[VELMA]
They had it coming
[GIRLS]
They had it coming
[VELMA]
They had it coming
[GIRLS]
They had it coming
[VELMA]
They had it coming
[GIRLS]
They took a flower
[VELMA]
All along
[GIRLS]
In its prime
[VELMA]
I didn't do it
[GIRLS]
And then they used it
[VELMA]
But if I'd done it,
How could you tell me that I was wrong?

[MONA(Spoken)]
I loved Al Lipschitz
more than I can possibly say.
He was a real artistic guy...
sensitive... a painter.
But he was always trying
to find himself.
He'd go out every night
looking for himself
and on the way
he found Ruth,
Gladys,
Rosemary and Irving.
I guess you can say we broke
up because of artistic differences.
He saw himself as alive
and I saw him dead.

[ALL]
The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum
The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum

[Group 1]
They had it comin'
[Group 2]
They had it comin'
[Group 1]
They had it comin'
[Group 2]
They had it comin'
[Group 1]
They had it comin'
[Group 2]
They had it comin'
[Group 1]
All along
[Group 2]
All along
[Group 1]
'Cause if they used us
[Group 2]
'Cause if they used us
[Group 1]
And they abused us
[Group 2]
And they abused us
[ALL]
How could you tell us that we were wrong?

[Group 1]
He had it coming
[Group 2]
He had it coming
[Group 1]
He only had himself to blame.
[Group 2]
He only had himself to blame.
[Group 1]
If you'd have been there
[Group 2]
If you'd have been there
[Group 1]
If you'd have seen it
[Group 2]
If you'd have seen it
[ALL]
I betcha you would have done the same!

[LIZ (Spoken)]
You pop that gum one more time!
[ANNIE (spoken)]
Single my ass.
[JUNE (Spoken)]
Ten times!
[HUNYAK (Spoken)]
Miert csukott Uncle Same bortonbe.
[VELMA (Spoken)]
Number seventeen-the spread eagle.
[MONA (Spoken)]
Artistic differences.

[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!
 
LovingTongue said:
Hell, try and find someone who doesn't think all men are idiots. You can find 'em, for sure - but again, not in any position of power.

Pffft. Give me a few years, I'm working on it!

Well said, LT.
 
It's just a TV show.

An attempt could be made to analyze "Gunsmoke" too, but why bother?
 
landslider said:
It's just a TV show.

An attempt could be made to analyze "Gunsmoke" too, but why bother?

Why not? Although gunsmoke wasn't that deep.

And I suppose Star Trek was "just a show"? Or Bonanza? Or The Prisoner?
 
LOL.

By the standard above, "Gunsmoke" was about the Rousseauian view of nature , the Turner Thesis, and so forth.
 
landslider said:
LOL.

By the standard above, "Gunsmoke" was about the Rousseauian view of nature , the Turner Thesis, and so forth.


Have you ever even watched any of the series I mentioned, especially The Prisoner? Can you tell me what it was about?
 
Watched him in "Secret Agent," but was overseas when "The Prisoner" was on.

Have you ever even heard of Rousseau or Turner?

Can you tell me what they were about?
 
landslider said:
Watched him in "Secret Agent," but was overseas when "The Prisoner" was on.

Have you ever even heard of Rousseau or Turner?

Can you tell me what they were about?

You're being a hypocrite.
 
landslider said:
It's just a TV show.

An attempt could be made to analyze "Gunsmoke" too, but why bother?
"It's just a TV show" is not a very good argument.

People are very impressionable, that is part of why why we have ratings for movies and games.

People affect what messages go on TV and what goes on TV affects people's perceptions of things. It goes both ways.
 
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