Guys, have you ever hit a woman? Ever.

[Marxist]

I don't want to hear about the time Bertha Washington kicked you in the nuts in 4th grade and you had to respond. I also don't want to hear about some BDSM bullshit.

I'm asking, have you ever ever hit, punched, or kicked a woman in anger and on purpose? Period.

 

[TN_Vixen]

how many men are going to respond

"Hell yeah, I kick my old lady around all the time, but you know, she deserves it. If she wouldn't piss me off, she wouldn't get slapped around"

 

[Rubyfruit]

Not a man, but if one ever hit me in anger, it would be the last time he ever touched me.

 

[BigDawg69]

Nope never ever.

 

[april-wine]

I've been hitting on Ruby for weeks.............

 

[Marxist]

Re: how many men are going to respond

"Hell yeah, I kick my old lady around all the time, but you know, she deserves it. If she wouldn't piss me off, she wouldn't get slapped around"

I didn't want to prejudice the response, but yes I have. I'm not really proud of it. !0 years ago in a fight with my SO she hit me in the face twice. I punched her in the ribs. Not a good moment for anyone. I promised myself from then on to always walk away. I'm not sure if that's good enough, but I haven't done it again.

 

[lilminx]

Not a man, but if one ever hit me in anger, it would be the last time he ever touched me.

What she said.

 

[HarlemBlade]

No, I've never hit a woman and never plan to (unless tae kwon do classes count; but she was asking for it).

My last girlfriend hit me a lot, though. She was kind of messed up. One of those short girls that got a kick out of punching her taller and stronger boyfriend.






Yes, I admit...I miss the punches

 

[Marxist]

Not a man, but if one ever hit me in anger, it would be the last time he ever touched me.

Easy to say in the abstract. Almost impossible in practice.

 

[TN_Vixen]

Re: Re: how many men are going to respond

I didn't want to prejudice the response, but yes I have. I'm not really proud of it. !0 years ago in a fight with my SO she hit me in the face twice. I punched her in the ribs. Not a good moment for anyone. I promised myself from then on to always walk away. I'm not sure if that's good enough, but I haven't done it again.

No, it's not good enough. I remember my ex husband telling me that he slapped a girl he dated and from that moment on I was afraid of him getting physical with me when we fought. In all fairness, he never hit me, but he was a big bully. He pushed me a lot, and verbal/emotional abuse is just as damaging... sometimes I felt as if I'd been knocked around just by his words.

I only hit him once and it suprised me just as much as it did him.

I can't imagine being a man and feeling in any way justified for using my strength over a woman.. no matter what the circumstance.

 

[MissTaken]

Easy to say in the abstract. Almost impossible in practice.

Good point.

It is easy to predict your behavior when you are calm, aloof and emotionally detached from a situation. When in the midst of a situation, we don't always know what we would do when emotions become involved, even if the greatest emotion is fear.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Marx, we all do things in anger that we regret later. I've lost control before. I've thrown things at my husband, but thank god I'm a lousy aim and none of the objects actually made contact with him.

That was many years ago as well, and I believe I've since learned to curb my anger.

My brother is of the opinion that if his wife (or any woman) hits him, he may then hit her back. I don't really know what to say to that. I'm sure if I was hit in the face like you were, my first instinct might be to hit back as well.

I'm glad that you've learned to walk away now, and I hope your s/o has stopped hitting you!

 

[Weevil]

Re: Re: Re: how many men are going to respond

No, it's not good enough.

What, he's not allowed to make one mistake in his life? The fact that he made the mistake and learned from it, "isn't good enough" Why not?

As for me. I'll go with....no. I threw a girl pretty hard against a wall during a bar fight though. Not my proudest moment.

 

[Marxist]

Re: Re: Re: how many men are going to respond

He pushed me a lot, and verbal/emotional abuse is just as damaging... sometimes I felt as if I'd been knocked around just by his words.

I only hit him once and it suprised me just as much as it did him.

I can't imagine being a man and feeling in any way justified for using my strength over a woman.. no matter what the circumstance.

I only hit her once and it surprised me just as much as it did her.

What's the diff?

 

[Cath!]

I have been pushed very hard twice...out of anger...and I have smacked back...but that was a very long time ago.

I find that it is easier to walk away...or just kinda go inside yourself and then the anger passes faster.

 

[seXieleXie]

i've never hit anyone out of anger that i can recall, man or woman.
the only time in recent memory i've been violent due to anger was about two years ago. my brother pissed me off so much that i threw the contents of my glass in his face (ice water) and when i did that and still wasn't satisfied i threw the glass at him, right in the gut. then i went to my room and cried myself sick. he apologized, i don't think i ever did. it takes so much to drive me to that point, i was hardly even conscious of my actions.

 

[TN_Vixen]

Re: Re: Re: Re: how many men are going to respond

I only hit her once and it surprised me just as much as it did her.

What's the diff?

What's the difference? Jesus, c'mon, I know you're not serious. Unless you were dating some chick that outweighed you by 50# or she was a bodybuilder, men have much more advantage in physical strength than women do. A slap on the face is completely different than a punch in the ribs. There's no fucking comparison.

 

[TN_Vixen]

Re: Re: Re: Re: how many men are going to respond

What, he's not allowed to make one mistake in his life? The fact that he made the mistake and learned from it, "isn't good enough" Why not?

As for me. I'll go with....no. I threw a girl pretty hard against a wall during a bar fight though. Not my proudest moment.

No, he's not forgiven for punching a woman. It isn't "good enough" that he sits here and admits it in hopes of exonerating himself. You will never get me to see that his behavior then is excused now. Having said that, I'm not insinuating that he is branded for life or doesn't have the capability to never behave that way again, but I also cannot find any reason to make him feel good about what he did then.

Now, why doesn't it suprise me that you "threw a girl pretty hard against a wall during a bar fight"? huh! Imagine that.

 

[Marxist]

So, let me get this straight Vixen.

Man hitting woman: Not OK

Woman hitting man: OK

Man verbally assaulting woman: Same as a hit.

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: how many men are going to respond

Unless you were dating some chick that outweighed you by 50# or she was a bodybuilder, men have much more advantage in physical strength than women do. A slap on the face is completely different than a punch in the ribs. There's no fucking comparison.

You are saying that it is based on size or strength whether a person can hit another back after being attacked. This logic then tells me that you are against the United States attacking the smaller and weaker Afghanistan army, even though the United States was struck first. There is a big difference between blowing up one building and demolishing a whole country, like you say. The Taliban army is smaller and weaker too. You are either with the terrorists or you are with the Americans. Which is it?

 

[freakygirl]

If I'm hit.. I'm going to hit back

If I hit him.. I expect to be hit back..

natural human response..

Sorry guys.. I agree with Marxist.. why is it ok for a woman to hit a man? But not ok for a man to hit a woman? And don't give me the "strength" thing.. it's all bullshit..


and no, i'm not an abuser.. and i'm not abused.. ONE man raised his hand to me (didn't hit me but wanted to).. I walked out and never went back.


* I don't think anyone should hit anyone. My questions are for the sake of this argument.

 

[lavender]

 

[Weevil]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: how many men are going to respond

No, he's not forgiven for punching a woman. It isn't "good enough" that he sits here and admits it in hopes of exonerating himself. You will never get me to see that his behavior then is excused now. Having said that, I'm not insinuating that he is branded for life or doesn't have the capability to never behave that way again, but I also cannot find any reason to make him feel good about what he did then.

Now, why doesn't it suprise me that you "threw a girl pretty hard against a wall during a bar fight"? huh! Imagine that.

I'm not sure he's looking for forgiveness or to be excused but your attitude seems to imply that he is branded for life if the only adult thing he can do, learn from a mistake and not do it again, isn't good enough. What is good enough then? Building a time machine? Killing himself over the shame. Is nothing good enough? If that's what you're saying then you are insinuating that he can never again not wear the stigma of once having hit a woman.

Why doesn't it suprise you? Who knows? I did get into a lot of bar fights in my wild days and women don't exactly shy away from them. I'm not thrilled about what I did but I still think it was better then letting her punch me.

 

[TN_Vixen]

So, let me get this straight Vixen.

Man hitting woman: Not OK

Woman hitting man: OK

Man verbally assaulting woman: Same as a hit.

Marxist. Listen. I'm not condoning physical abuse in any form, be it female on male or vice versa. What I am saying is that men in general have more physical strength than a woman. I'm all for equal rights, but I'm also a realist concerning this specific instance. Men ARE stronger, for the most part.

Convince me that the woman you punched caused you to suffer from her slaps or kicks like she did from your single punch.

Agression takes many forms, and YES, verbal assault be it from a woman or a man is very similar to physical abuse.

 

[TN_Vixen]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: how many men are going to respond

You are saying that it is based on size or strength whether a person can hit another back after being attacked. This logic then tells me that you are against the United States attacking the smaller and weaker Afghanistan army, even though the United States was struck first. There is a big difference between blowing up one building and demolishing a whole country, like you say. The Taliban army is smaller and weaker too. You are either with the terrorists or you are with the Americans. Which is it?

Should I even justify this comment by responding? *laughing* C'mon, we're talking one on one personal situations between men and women. I mentioned the strength issue simply because it is a physiological fact that most men have the potential to be stronger than women... for you to make the correlation between this argument and current political machinations is slightly(!) ridiculous.