God damn SPAM!!

[Patryn]

And I ain't talkin' bout the lunch meat...wait, is it meat? But I digress. Now, I have a small family, but we're all pretty close. Still, all that aside, I am going to murder my cousin if she sends me any more lame spam.

She knows nothing about computers, and thinks it's "cute" or something to send everything she gets to everyone she knows. She sent me the I Love You virus for the love of god!! Good thing I have a Mac that doesn't know what to do with a .vbs.exe unless I use my PC emulator.

Yesterday was the straw that broke this already overloaded camel's back. She sent me this (excuse the formatting please):

> > >     Subject: Cancer (DO NOT DELETE) - You
must forward!!!!!!
> > >
> > >     Hi, my name is Amy Bruce.I am 7 years old,
and I have severe lung
> > cancer
> > >
> > > from second hand smoke. I also have a large
tumor in my brain, from
> > repeated
> > >
> > > beatings.  The doctors say I will die soon if
this isn't fixed, and my
> > > family
> > > can't pay the bills. The Make A Wish
Foundation, has agreed to donate 7
> > > cents
> > > for every name on this list. For those of you
who send this along, I
>thank
> > > you so much, but for those who don't send it,
what goes around comes
> > around.
> > >
> > > Have a Heart, please send this. Please, if you
are a kind person, send
> > this
> > > on. >>

AS IF!!! And she believes this. First of all, this obviously was not written by a 7 year old. Secondly, I'm pretty damn sure Make a Wish doesn't work like that. Thirdly, I don't think the cancer thing is medically possible, or my cousin and I would both have cancer....I'm 23 and she's 19 and both our parents smoke. She still lives at home. Fourthly...IF this is a real child, chances are Social Services would have had her removed from the home a looooong time ago.

Why am I posting this? Who the hell knows. Just venting, comiserating, whatever I suppose. And maybe someone will get a good laugh, or at least roll their eyes. What's everyone say I send her Suzy DeLucci and the Miracle of Life?

I felt kinda bad railing her out for this, but da-amn, this girl is driving me nuts!!

 

[CreamyLady]

I get this crap too, from people with the best intentions.

I finally told each of them that each of their emails would be sent straight to the trash unless they only sent me real messages. I did just that; I filtered all their mail into my trash.

I no doubt have the worst luck in the world, thanks to all the chains that hit the dumpster, but my mailbox is a lot emptier. Earthlink's Spaminator helped too!

 

[Lasher]

"I love spam. I'm having Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Bacon, Eggs and Spam..."

And I ain't talkin' bout the lunch meat...wait, is it meat?

Rumor has it that it's Pork Shoulder and Ham...

Btw, I hate this crap, too (the email spam).

 

[Patryn]

I have no problem with forwards, if there's some thought but into it and the person knows it is something I would actually enjoy, or if it's legitimate information. This one just took the taco, though. My cousin is also notorious for sending me those stupid assed "friendship stars" that are nothing but 60K of:
*
**
***
**
* etc etc...

Another pet peeve of mine is when someone sends this shit to mailing lists. I'm an aquarium hobbyist, so I belong to several lists on that topic, and I do not need to see this there. The spam usually gets quoted about 7 times while eveyone bitches about it. I also moderate a list....anyone who spams is gone, no questions asked, and I have a good deal of subscribers...hmm...do you see a corrolation?

I have a fast as hell cable modem connection, so loading this smeg isn't usually a problem, but the point that I have to IS.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'll have the spam, spam, spam, and eggs, hold the spam.

I'm sorry sir, we can't do that.

Thank you so much, Lasher, for getting that in my head now.

 

[Laurel]

Gah! Struck a nerve with this thread!

If there's anything more annoying than the "Make $1 Million a Week By Reading Email!" type spam, it's the "If You Pass This On to 10 Friends, You'll Get FREE (fill in product here) for Life!" or "If You Pass This On to 10 Friends, You'll Save Little Cancer Victim Bobby!" I recently got one that was supposedly written by Kelly somebody, "Founder of Abercrombie & Fitch", promising me free clothes for life if I passed this email on to 10 other people. First of all, Abercrombie & Fitch is a 100-year-old company, and I sincerely doubt that the founder's name is Kelly or that he/she's still around to send out emails promising free clothes.

Secondly, how could you possibly trace that? It's not linear... If I send it out to 10 of my friends, and they send it out to 10 of their friends, and so on, it forms a huge fan. Why would any company spend the time & money necessary to trace down the email paths, assuming it were possible, just so they could give away free shit? And how would such an email help them? If everyone on the list is getting free clothes for life, who exactly are you going to sell to compensate for your costs? There's been no confirmed account of ANY company using this type of "marketing".

If we all band together and delete these stupid obnoxious urban legends as they hit our mailbox, we can help stop this cancer from spreading. And for every one you delete, you're guaranteed a lifetime subscription to Literotica.

 

[Laurel]

OMG!

I just got this one in the mail - 5 times thus far today. It's obviously a scam of some sort - possibly a 1-900 scam, so don't call the number:

- - - - -

Hi,
A Poll is being taken to settle the issue whether
commercial e-mail or SPAM is a good form of advertisement,
which you would like more of or it's a bad form of
advertisement which you are against.
Your opinion on how to make this kind of advertisement
better & to increase its use is vital. Or if this is a
terrible form of advertisement and how it should be curtailed,
regulated or ended all together.

Please call, 1-900-226-0388 and tell us.

The charges for registering your opinion are as follows:
Of the $1.99 per minute charge,
1-dollar goes to the telephone service Bureau
19 cents to retrieve your opinion
79 cents to transcribe this information into a viable format
Leaving a total of 2 cents.
So do call if you wish to get your 2 cents worth in !





Attention both Pro and Anti Spam Advocates and those of you who may
have sought removal from any number of bulk mailing lists. If you
have received this e-mail it is because it is a conscious decision on
our part to try and include everyone in this important poll. To not
have included those who profess a dislike for this form of
advertisement would have eliminated those individuals from the
process and provide an unfair advantage to one side of the poll. We
sincerely hope that all interested individuals or entity's understand
the necessity of inclusion.


********************************************************

This message is sent in compliance of the proposed
bill:SECTION 301.
Per Section 301, Paragraph (a)(2)(C) of S. 1618,
further transmissions to you by the sender of this
email may be stopped at no cost to you by sending a
reply to this email address with the word remove in
the subject line. This message is not intended for
residents in the State of Washington, screening of
addresses has been done to the best of our technical
ability. If you are a Washington, Virginia, or
California resident or otherwise wish to be removed
from this list, further transmissions to you by the
sender of this email may be stopped at no cost to you
by sending a reply to mstrsrvcs@mailme.org
with the word remove in the subject line.

*********************************************************




M-AR-50-EM-J

 

[Rapheal]

I know that i am going to push a few buttons here but what the hell...
Why does it seem that all the spam emails i get are from females?! I got sent the same spam thing FIVE TIMES from the same girl today. i'll admit that the ones who send them are mostly teenage girls but still. i don't know of one guy that has sent me a spam ever. i probably should have kept my mouth shut huh?

 

[Svedish_Chef]

Monty and his python

Hey Raphael we find it hard enough to do the email thing let alone bother sending the stuff!

"Lovely SPAM wonderful SPAM.... but I dont like SPAM!"

Oh yeah lash... seen the goodies have you?

Da chef

 

[April]

I am the black hole of Spam. Or was that the Spaminator? Or maybe it was the Spam motel? Spam checks in, but it don't check out!

I'm sick of it too. I have this friend that used to send me that crap. Friendship letters, 'if you send this to 10 people' crap. I got fed up one day, and forwarded something she had sent back to her 10 times! There was my 10 people! Nobody ever said that you had to send it to 10 different people!! She stopped that right away, and I've had no problems with her since.