Gender Bending

[AflyinYourweb]

Sudden thought: if a well rounded person is a person that is in touch with both their feminine and masculine side, can we draw a parallel and say that SWITCHES are potentially better rounded persons than pure Doms or subs? Or is it a bit like apples and oranges as a SWITCH is like a BI, and you can be in touch with both your masculine and feminine side even if you are 99.9% straight?

I certainly wouldn't want to draw parallels between switches and bi-sexuals.

I will say that, in some ways, I envy both groups for the experiences and insights they may have gained from being able to cross more boundaries than I have managed as a hetero submissive.

As for your last question: "...you can be in touch with both your masculine and feminine side even if you are 99.9% straight?"

I believe one can be in touch with one's feminine side and be 100% straight. For me, getting in touch with my feminine side was more a matter of opening my ears and my mind. It was allowing my imagination to go where it had never gone before. The CD and make-up and such were props which aided in that process, perhaps accelerated it, but, in retrospect, were not absolutely essential, or the only way to get there.

 

[Shankara20]

See, that's the difference. You pull the look off beautifully. It's your thing. It would be low comedy for me at best.

I worry too much about my non-existant dignity, I think.

your dignity is still intact, my dear...




ps - I'm still willing to destroy that dignity anytime you wish,
all you gota do is whistle - you do know how to whistle don't you?

 

[Shankara20]

And Kabuki is a great example of masculine men gender bending... thanks Hom...

indeed

 

[Shankara20]

: falls off chair with shock :













not

:helps Sister Rebecca back into her thrown, errr, chair:

 

[unfoundiamond]

I was not saying that, exactly

Rida,
I have to preface what I say with I am not disagreeing with you to say you are wrong, I just said something diffrent

I want to be sure not to say anything potentially offensive to Ds or s'... I am saying that people who can be open minded enough to expiriment with gender roles and gender bending are more well rounded (with the knowledge gained) than closed minded people who will not allow themselves to expirience all the sights sounds and expiriences that come with seeing life through the eyes of your counterpart...

I am not saying you have to be a switch to gender bend...

I think not all switches are bi sexual either...

I don't want to say anything except basically don't be closed minded about gender bending, I learned a lot about how people really are when I used to bend my gender and look masculine... I learned both good and bad things... and they have changed the way I treat people and the way I look at how people treat me...

I speak from my expiriences, If I am not sure about something then will admit when I don't know something to be true... and this is one of those times

*smile*

 

[Homburg]

Didn't want to bring it up but since you did ... You do look good in your Kimono ... and I know I ma being a snob, but not many GAIJIN (not-Japanese) can really pull it off and not look like they are just wearing a robe.

Thank you, rida-chan. Tomorrow night is Fetish Night at the goth club I go to. I've lined up a cute lil goth/raver rope bunny for some tying at the club, and will be wearing my kimono for it.

Back to the cross-dressing, many men in the Westners world would consider wearing a Kimono sort of cross-dressing.

Only because they're ignorant gaijin

 

[Homburg]

your dignity is still intact, my dear...

I dunno. DeservingBitch got me to talk about how hairy my ass is. That's a dignity-killer right there

ps - I'm still willing to destroy that dignity anytime you wish,
all you gota do is whistle - you do know how to whistle don't you?

You are a vile tempter, Shanks

 

[rida]

Rida,
I have to preface what I say with I am not disagreeing with you to say you are wrong, I just said something diffrent

I want to be sure not to say anything potentially offensive to Ds or s'... I am saying that people who can be open minded enough to expiriment with gender roles and gender bending are more well rounded (with the knowledge gained) than closed minded people who will not allow themselves to expirience all the sights sounds and expiriences that come with seeing life through the eyes of your counterpart...

I am not saying you have to be a switch to gender bend...

I think not all switches are bi sexual either...

I don't want to say anything except basically don't be closed minded about gender bending, I learned a lot about how people really are when I used to bend my gender and look masculine... I learned both good and bad things... and they have changed the way I treat people and the way I look at how people treat me...

I speak from my expiriences, If I am not sure about something then will admit when I don't know something to be true... and this is one of those times

*smile*

Thank you... I understand what you are saying. You are talking about expriences and esperimenting independently of your sexual orientation whereas I moved the subject to what somebody's orientation is. And that is out of the topic of this thread.
I didn't mean to imply that you made the statement in my last paragraph

Also, didn't mean to imply anything offensive and I didn't want to imply that all switches are bi-sexual either.

 

[rida]

I certainly wouldn't want to draw parallels between switches and bi-sexuals.

I will say that, in some ways, I envy both groups for the experiences and insights they may have gained from being able to cross more boundaries than I have managed as a hetero submissive.

As for your last question: "...you can be in touch with both your masculine and feminine side even if you are 99.9% straight?"

I believe one can be in touch with one's feminine side and be 100% straight. For me, getting in touch with my feminine side was more a matter of opening my ears and my mind. It was allowing my imagination to go where it had never gone before. The CD and make-up and such were props which aided in that process, perhaps accelerated it, but, in retrospect, were not absolutely essential, or the only way to get there.

Guess it was a bad idea to draw that parallel ...lol

And yes, I too believe you can be in touch with your opposite side and still be 100% straight. And that you can bend genders without CD.

 

[rida]

*little highjack *

Thank you, rida-chan. Tomorrow night is Fetish Night at the goth club I go to. I've lined up a cute lil goth/raver rope bunny for some tying at the club, and will be wearing my kimono for it.

Homburg-sama, as if I am not wishing already to be on your part of the world ... did you have to go and say that???

no need to answer ... I know the answer ... you are a sadist ... *goes back to dreaming about being a rope-bunny ...*



*end highjack*

 

[Homburg]

*little highjack *

Homburg-sama, as if I am not wishing already to be on your part of the world ... did you have to go and say that???

no need to answer ... I know the answer ... you are a sadist ... *goes back to dreaming about being a rope-bunny ...*

*end highjack*

rida-chan, you know that you are always welcome, and that I would love the oppurtunity...

 

[Shankara20]

Also, didn't mean to imply anything offensive and I didn't want to imply that all switches are bi-sexual either.

and then again, some of us are

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I've said it before: The idea that its possible to know what the opposite sex experiences is a delusion. You can only experience them thru your own sex. No woman alive or dead knows what a testicle injury feels like. Ditto for males and childbirth. Pick your experience. Try and experience what a quadriplegic experiences, without the paralysis. A quadriplegic is certain youve lost your fucking mind when you say, "I know what youre feeling."

 

[JMohegan]

Sudden thought: if a well rounded person is a person that is in touch with both their feminine and masculine side, can we draw a parallel and say that SWITCHES are potentially better rounded persons than pure Doms or subs? Or is it a bit like apples and oranges as a SWITCH is like a BI, and you can be in touch with both your masculine and feminine side even if you are 99.9% straight?

Rida, I am curious to know which characteristics, traits, strengths, weaknesses, or general behaviors you would attribute to a "feminine side," and which you would attribute to the masculine.

Whenever you have the time and inclination, would you please explain?

 

[rida]

and then again, some of us are

lucky you

 

[rida]

Rida, I am curious to know which characteristics, traits, strengths, weaknesses, or general behaviors you would attribute to a "feminine side," and which you would attribute to the masculine.

Whenever you have the time and inclination, would you please explain?

I feared this question would come up as honestly ... the more I think about it the more it gets confusing ...lol

Prefacing that I do not assume that female (sex) = feminine (personality) and same for male and masculine, I guess I'll have to go with the stereotypes:

masculine = hard, extrovert, action oriented, goal oriented, single focused, fighter, self-reliant, penetrant, dominant

feminine = soft, introspective, word oriented, details oriented, multi-tasker, nurturer, cooperative, receptive, submissive

... and with the last pair of carachteristic I am sure I have just digged my own flaming hell ...

 

[Shankara20]

... and with the last pair of carachteristic I am sure I have just digged my own flaming hell ...

you're doing just fine on your own, but if you need any help digging let me know and I can toss you a shovel I often used in the past to dig myself into flaming hell


I have been enjoying lurking this thread that I started so we could toss about gender labeling and expression. Sorry that work and the blossoming of a relationship with a vanilla female with no past experience with a crossdressing boyfriend have kept me from joining in the fun. Her questions about my CDing as she works to appreciate it have given me pause to ponder my own motivation. If any clarity arrives for me, I will share it here for discussion.

I must say I was surprised at her surprise at the number of dresses she found in my closet when I invited her to find a robe to her use the other evening - me CDing is more involved then she had allowed herself to expect. My reaction to her surprise came with a little embarrassment and a tad amount of shame -

god help me when she stumbles into my pile of undies

 

[rida]

you're doing just fine on your own, but if you need any help digging let me know and I can toss you a shovel I often used in the past to dig myself into flaming hell


I have been enjoying lurking this thread that I started so we could toss about gender labeling and expression. Sorry that work and the blossoming of a relationship with a vanilla female with no past experience with a crossdressing boyfriend have kept me from joining in the fun. Her questions about my CDing as she works to appreciate it have given me pause to ponder my own motivation. If any clarity arrives for me, I will share it here for discussion.

I must say I was surprised at her surprise at the number of dresses she found in my closet when I invited her to find a robe to her use the other evening - me CDing is more involved then she had allowed herself to expect. My reaction to her surprise came with a little embarrassment and a tad amount of shame -

god help me when she stumbles into my pile of undies

Thanks for the shovel ... I'll come and borrow it next time!

Figured you were busy with your lady-friend ....

Honestly I do not know how I would have reacted before to a closet full of dresses ... and a drawer full of panties ... , but now ... I would probably just start comenting on them and if they fit me, I would just try them on ... and of course I would give some Italian fashion sense unsollicited advice ...

 

[unfoundiamond]

Wtf...

So Hom.... Ditto what she said, Why you gotta make me wish I wasn't so far... Not Fair...I wanna be tied (By someone who knows what they are doing)... *not used to not getting what she wants*....

Rida
Always a pleasure... It is good to see someone questioning things and trying to form their own conclusions... maybe this time it didn't apply, but its good that you question things... TTYL...

AFly~ I agree with your post about being straight and crossdressing,
Gender bending is not a orientation, it is a identity issue more, I used to struggle with those two issues... seprately. And I can easyly see how they are seprate, though I think people who don't deal with these issues and feelings cannot see how they separate.

I haven't ever admited this...
I happen to have a old fantasy about this fantasyGuy who wears a silk teddy and the idea of his hard dick coming from below the silk... I don't know why, but the juxtaposition of the two opposites (him actually feminized, but not gentle... for some reason I want him to be kinda mean towards the end...lol...yes all my fantasies are hardcore... I don't know why)

But...
I used to think I was transgendered, because I think like a guy, I like male things... I get along better with guys for the most part... but I learned what I look like and how I feel is up to me, and some days I wear my bfs big 2xl Tshirts and Dickies, And some days I wear a corset... Its whatever I want... and I have gone the full spectrum on how I can be and settled somewhere in the middle I shop at Gap and Limited, opting for trouser cut pants, or tank tops and jeans (femine overall, but slighty masculine hints)...

But in high school I had short blonde eminem hair, loud hip hop style oversized clothes, and a unapologetic attitude
If someone could call me Sir, because they couldn't tell I was a girl at the time, then yes I can know what it is like to pass for a guy, and when I was fucking my ex Fiance Jessica with a dick that belonged to me, or when I went to the barber shop and had my hair cut every 2 weeks, or when I'd go for walks on the beach at night with my girlfriend and make love right there next to the water... *daydreaming*

I did things that are traditionally things that men do, I lived a completely untraditional female life, where the only paralells I could draw between my life and someone elses where to the men in my life, (my father, my grandpa)

I am not saying I know what it FEELS like to have jbj suck my balls but... I understand what its like to look like the male cookie cutter insted of the female...

No one knows what anyone else feels or goes through, and I do know what gender bending is like and that's what we are talking about...

No one is saying a female can BE a male and feel his feelings, but I can LOOK like a man, and FEEL what its like to be called Sir, or share other traditionally male expiriences.

 

[Homburg]

So Hom.... Ditto what she said, Why you gotta make me wish I wasn't so far... Not Fair...I wanna be tied (By someone who knows what they are doing)... *not used to not getting what she wants*....

The world cries out in need of riggers. I will answer that call...

But, alas, my primary duty is to the citizens of my own fair metropolis.

*strikes heroic pose with a coil of rope hanging from his belt*

 

[nh23]

The world cries out in need of riggers. I will answer that call...

But, alas, my primary duty is to the citizens of my own fair metropolis.

*strikes heroic pose with a coil of rope hanging from his belt*

Oh my! It's a bird, it's a plane. No it's Super Hommie!!

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

HUMBUG this is for you.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article482078.ece

 

[Homburg]

HUMBUG this is for you.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article482078.ece

JBJ, I just wanted to remind you that you are not like the others. You have gotten lost in whatever it is that motivates you and lost site of normal. Go back, JAMES. Go back to normal. They're waiting for you. They love you, and they want you back.

 

[nh23]

JBJ, I just wanted to remind you that you are not like the others. You have gotten lost in whatever it is that motivates you and lost site of normal. Go back, JAMES. Go back to normal. They're waiting for you. They love you, and they want you back.

*giggles*

 

[DeservingBitch]

I dunno. DeservingBitch got me to talk about how hairy my ass is. That's a dignity-killer right there

No no no. The real dignity-killer would be that hairy ass in my cute panties. 'Cause the panties would be way too small.