StillStunned
Mr Sticky
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Minute Maid: A woman who orgasms after three strokes, then roles over and falls asleep. The most satisfaction you'll get out of her is if you give her oral, as long as you like fruit juice.
Female Archetypes
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forgotmyantidepressants
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Do we have to use the word "bitch"? Why not confident and self-assured?
forgotmyantidepressants
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It's not really sexual, either.
pink_silk_glove
Literate Smutress
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It's all right. I'm a bitch. No big whoop. (shrug)
Lifestyle66
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My wife ENJOYS drawing that term out of me!
She will, at times, choose to be aggressive, controlling, unreasonable, malicious, and domineering, merely to incite me until I call her "Bitch!", to which she responds, sweetly saying "But I'm YOUR bitch!"
I think it's a sport to her. She wears that term with pride!
EDIT: I've long ago realized that she's "self-assured" and does not care at all what others think of her. NOTHING you can say to her can bother her. Call her a "MILF", and she's likely to respond "Oh, yeah! I'm that sexy!"
pink_silk_glove
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Hoping to not derail the thread, but I will take the opportunity to add that being self-assured, or at least accepting oneself is a choice. Most people don't know this. I used to not accept myself until I learned that it is simply a choice. Once one learns that, the choice is easy and one becomes self-assured.
I'm not trying to say that anyone who does not choose to be self-assured is wrong or a lesser person. It is a tricky thing to learn as our society tells us the opposite at every turn. However, I've been fortunate to have an experience that allowed me to learn this, and I relay this in hopes that others can realize this and choose to accept themselves and gain their self esteem and be self-assured. Because life is just way better this way. There will always be ups and downs, happy days and sad days, but it is a blessed blessed comfort to know that you will never ever be depressed again as long as you live, because you accept yourself and have a measure of self-assurance.
I just wanted to share that. Carry on.
Cagivagurl
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Being confident and self assured means I get to choose who calls me what.
I will allow my friends, who I trust and admire to call me names others can't.
If on the other hand somebody I don't know thinks they can do likewise. I am quick to put them in their place.
The purpose of being confident is choice.
I choose, nobody else chooses for me... If I feel it was said as a joke, or in a loving context. I will accept it. Other than that. Look out...
I have beliefs, and I am happy to stand up for them. Call me judgy, or preachy... I don't care. They are my opinions.
I'm not telling people what to write, or how to write it.
I merely offered a different perspective, which doesn't demean or dehumanise women.
Cagivagurl
I will allow my friends, who I trust and admire to call me names others can't.
If on the other hand somebody I don't know thinks they can do likewise. I am quick to put them in their place.
The purpose of being confident is choice.
I choose, nobody else chooses for me... If I feel it was said as a joke, or in a loving context. I will accept it. Other than that. Look out...
I have beliefs, and I am happy to stand up for them. Call me judgy, or preachy... I don't care. They are my opinions.
I'm not telling people what to write, or how to write it.
I merely offered a different perspective, which doesn't demean or dehumanise women.
Cagivagurl
forgotmyantidepressants
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I'm self-assured enough to say that I don't like being called a "bitch". Just as you are self-assured enough to say that you do.
pink_silk_glove
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More accurately, people choose to call you whatever they want. Your choice is to believe what they say or not.
If someone says, "Hey PSG, you're stupid, have a cunt personality and can't write worth a shit," it all comes down to how much of that I actually believe or might believe. If I believe any of it, I will either accept/agree with it or get butthurt over it. If I don't believe any of it, it will not hurt my feelings. I may argue against it, but not over my feelings.
That is the test, the butthurt test. If someone tries to insult you and you feel bad, it means that you actually believe or might believe it in some way and your gut instinct is telling you that you might have a faulty belief. Then you can sort out your beliefs and make changes in yourself. That is how you grow. This is all part of what I've learned. Of course the ego never admits fault, so you have to kinda push ego aside for the truth. When you lash back out of hurt, that is the ego telling you that it's the other person's fault for your own beliefs which is completely untrue and helps no one.
Lifestyle66
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So true!
If a word can make you angry, you have a weakness which others might exploit.
Tell a bully the word which makes you angry, ... and the bully can make you angry anytime they choose! They can trigger you at their pleasure, treating you like a puppet, jerking your strings anytime they want! All they need do is "say the word!"
The only way to disarm that bully is to "not get angry over ANY word!"
The old saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never harm me!" is a lesson many seem to have forgotten.
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pink_silk_glove
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Would it not be nice to have control of your own feelings and emotions? Well, if your strategy for feeling good about yourself relies on others treating you a certain way, you are literally giving up control of your feelings. The way to take control of your feelings is to simply realize that you are in control of them and always have been, and the only way that you lose control is by giving it up. Easier said than done, as again, our society tells us otherwise at every turn (and it's getting worse and worse with all of the cancel culture - everyone else should behave a certain way so that you can be happy, and you should behave a certain way so that everyone else can be happy - which is complete nonsense!), but once you realize that you are the only one in control of your feelings and emotions, life gets so much better, so much easier.
lovecraft68
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As bad as I expected.
Cagivagurl
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Sorry, but it's got nothing to do with whether you believe it.
It's whether you're going to accept it. If I choose not to accept or allow it...
It's a choice.
Being self assured and confident is all about how you feel about yourself... Not how others see you.
Cagivagurl
Cagivagurl
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I disagree... LOL, as if that comes as a surprise.
There is in my opinion truth in that old adage. "Sticks and stones may break bones, but words hurt."
If you and others are triggered by their use, and stand up knowing you are going to get criticised for defending your beliefs.
The only method of breaking down bullies is to point out their behaviour is unacceptable.
Letting them continue to demean you, only empowers them.
Confidence comes from inside...
Cagivagurl
Lifestyle66
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But the point is that if you choose to NOT ALLOW OTHERS to use certain words, then you have ENABLED others to control you!
Unless you intend to cut their tongues out, they CAN MAKE you angry by saying those words! They have a means to control the strings to make you react. And it's not about whether YOU believe it or not. It's about forcing you to react.
My wife is self-assured, not because anyone taught her HOW TO with catch phrases like "believe in yourself", "fight back", or "don't allow them to ...",. She's self-assured because she doesn't CARE what you or anyone else thinks or says! And you are powerless to make her care!
To my wife, anyone using disparaging terms on her are only worthy of her pressing the handle on the toilet to flush them away! She'll move on to surround herself with people who are happy and positive, while ignoring those with any negativity.
You can TRY breaking down bullies by pointing out their behavior is unacceptable. BUT you NEED them to agree and ACCEPT your version of how they should behave!!! They win by merely saying "No, I refuse to accept your way." Then what are you going to do? Get violent? That's what they really want: a reaction!
Did you read my story "The Maneater"? It starts with this type of scene: a woman encountering two thugs in a parking lot. The main female character in that story is modeled after my wife's attitudes. Even her boss at work can't make her give-a-shit! In the story, she decides whether she'll allow her misogynistic boss to remain employed in the company! (She has her ways!)
EDIT: BTW, I realize that trying to change a bully by pointing out that their behavior is unacceptable is about as effective as me trying to change YOUR attitudes with these debates! (Ironic, isn't it? LOL.)
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Cagivagurl
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Arguing our perspectives could go on for infinitum... You and I disagree... That's OK... I'm not trying to change your mind, merely expressing my opinion. Your opinion is as equally valid as mine.
My approach is, if I see something I disagree with. I speak up... I don't expect to change the world, I simply say "I disagree." Everybody has opinions... Speak up, or stay silent.
Silence merely empowers the bullies to keep doing the same old thing... Turning your back and walking away solves nothing.
My inner peace comes from knowing I spoke up. I have no expectations of changing the world.
Cagivagurl
SimonDoom
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I agree. A self aware bimbo is so much more interesting than an unthinking one.
I feel that way about kinks and fetishes generally.
The contributors to this thread have been more thoughtful than the thread title may have suggested. I think it's pretty clear most people are talking about erotic story types, not the varieties of real women. These are two different things.
pink_silk_glove
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You contradict yourself here. Accepting and believing are the same. And the last two lines are exactly what I said so I'm not sure what you are disagreeing with.
Again, these two lines contradict each other.
If confidence comes from the inside then words don't hurt as they are external.
Cagivagurl
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There is no contradiction.
The difference is in intent... Choosing to accept, or believe, are inherently different.
IMO... I'm not trying to alter your view. Just expressing my opinion...
You and I see the world through different lenses. Nothing wrong with that.
Cagivagurl
NotWise
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I can't add to the list or to the discussion.
My only point is that I avoid your archetypes and their labels. When you stick a label on a person (character or real) there's a tendency to stop thinking of them as the person they are and to start thinking of them as the label. Maybe you'd like to lean on an archetype to simplify a story, but in my life and in my writing, the fewer labels used, the better.
My only point is that I avoid your archetypes and their labels. When you stick a label on a person (character or real) there's a tendency to stop thinking of them as the person they are and to start thinking of them as the label. Maybe you'd like to lean on an archetype to simplify a story, but in my life and in my writing, the fewer labels used, the better.
lovecraft68
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The topic is female arch types, legit enough conversation in the terms of what we do here.
But I think the thread has inevitably exposed certain male arch types.
The question I ask myself is are they unaware of the negativity of what they're showing of themselves in their uncontrollable desire to exert control on how women think, feel, react and how they should be labeled and stereotyped or are they fully aware and so ingrained in their behavior they're convinced they're right so don't care?
The fact they can't help themselves renders either answer valid and damning.
I credit women on here for the patience they display in trying to use reason or simply defend your opinions. It's good to not just give in to what comes down to 'boys will be boys', but is ultimately futile. I don't want to say they don't get it, they simply choose not to, which is far worse.
'The usual suspects have shown up and shown out here in style.
Too bad because the topic itself has merit and I think the OP only meant it in those simple terms. CMI however, will always rear its head.
But I think the thread has inevitably exposed certain male arch types.
The question I ask myself is are they unaware of the negativity of what they're showing of themselves in their uncontrollable desire to exert control on how women think, feel, react and how they should be labeled and stereotyped or are they fully aware and so ingrained in their behavior they're convinced they're right so don't care?
The fact they can't help themselves renders either answer valid and damning.
I credit women on here for the patience they display in trying to use reason or simply defend your opinions. It's good to not just give in to what comes down to 'boys will be boys', but is ultimately futile. I don't want to say they don't get it, they simply choose not to, which is far worse.
'The usual suspects have shown up and shown out here in style.
Too bad because the topic itself has merit and I think the OP only meant it in those simple terms. CMI however, will always rear its head.
StillStunned
Mr Sticky
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You can't keep those old seadogs down!
AlinaX
Asymmetric Snowflake
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Seriously, we talk about avoiding stereotypes and caricatures and tropes and cliches, but it's absurd to pretend these things don't exist. There are six or seven basic plots, we keep being told, and maybe that's true. We can't avoid them but we can breathe fresh life into them. It's the same with characters. Listing and defining archetypes is just a way of highlighting the building blocks of the characters we create, and thus I can muse, "I'm going to write a story about a whore - with a heart of gold. A reluctant whore, coerced into the sex trade and learning to love it. Set on a spaceship. And she's non-binary and loves the idea of escaping to the stars. And one day... she gets there."
ETA: Four of the basic plots:
The Quest: The core of Sam's story: To escape Earth, to reach the stars and freedom, and to find her way ultimately to Algoran.
Overcoming The Monster: The monster is dystopian Earth's authorities, not defeated but escaped.
Voyage And Return: The voyage is to the stars, and the return is not to Earth but to humanity and a new home she has sought throughout.
Rags To Riches: She leaves Earth with nothing and must gradually surrender her humanity... to become something so much more.
ETA: Four of the basic plots:
The Quest: The core of Sam's story: To escape Earth, to reach the stars and freedom, and to find her way ultimately to Algoran.
Overcoming The Monster: The monster is dystopian Earth's authorities, not defeated but escaped.
Voyage And Return: The voyage is to the stars, and the return is not to Earth but to humanity and a new home she has sought throughout.
Rags To Riches: She leaves Earth with nothing and must gradually surrender her humanity... to become something so much more.
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