Faked orgasms

[doormouse]

Getting a guy off is generally easy. Unless we're sobering up and actually see what we drug home from the bar or are sick or dying, or it it's that rare instance every decade when we're not in the mood.

LMFAO!!!!!

TFF lol

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Personally, I think both men and women have become too sensitive to each other's needs. It turns sex into a competitive sport.

I prefer a greedy lover to a sensitive one. I prefer a hungry little slut to someone who's all concerned and worried about how she's doing. Fuck the technique. I want enthusiasm. Give me a woman who just wants everything she can get from me and damn the consequences.

---Zoot

 

[The_Darkness]

Thanks DM

It seems talking about sex only makes my mind more random, but having it....goddamn. The old noddle just pays attention to every sound, every movement, every breath, and it figures out what's going on and how to make it better. It's like having ADD and 150 IQ at the same time while having the one hobby everyone really ought to enjoy.

I think that's why I coughed out "Having a girl tell you she faked an orgasm is like winning the lottery and getting paid in Monopoly money" last night. It's a hell of a let down on that rare occassion, and mostly because there's no one else to blame (well, there's SOMEONE else to blame, and on rare occasions as many as 5 others to blame) but yourself. And the flu. Stupid flu.

 

[Guest]

Thank you! Mab. I absolutely hate having to tell a man what to do, or worse - have him ask me what I like. Let's just fuck, I say. And if it isn't great, move on.

Perdita

 

[The_Darkness]

Dr. Mab, aren't there days that we should all be like that? Greedy little sluts, I mean.

Oh hell. Bad mental image from that one.

 

[English Lady]

Personally, I think both men and women have become too sensitive to each other's needs. It turns sex into a competitive sport.

I prefer a greedy lover to a sensitive one. I prefer a hungry little slut to someone who's all concerned and worried about how she's doing. Fuck the technique. I want enthusiasm. Give me a woman who just wants everything she can get from me and damn the consequences.

---Zoot

*throws hand up in the air eagerly volunteering for the position!*

 

[impressive]

If he didn't give me one, I tell him.

Nobody "gives" me orgasms. I take them.

 

[The_Darkness]

Impressive, apparently there's some folks that have none for the taking from time to time....

 

[arienette]

I just tell them that they're not good or they're not going to give me one. I offer to "help" them, or sometimes just let them watch me masturbate because I like an audience.

 

[The_Darkness]

I just tell them that they're not good or they're not going to give me one. I offer to "help" them, or sometimes just let them watch me masturbate because I like an audience.

Rest assured, some of us like to watch. With this motley crew, I'd say all of us probably like to watch and many of us more than once.

I have a camera.

 

[Guest]

I do as Zoot said in his post. I just give myself to him and say, "Use me," which leads to literally hours of delicious, often aggressive, pure and rampant fucking. Yep, hungry little slut, that's me.

Maybe TMI, but ah well, it's Christmas.

Lou

Edited to add: That's kind of what I was getting at with my reference to forced orgasms, earlier in the thread: being made to come over and over again, even when I can't physically take it anymore. Like I said, it's hell.

 

[LadyJeanne]

I do as Zoot said in his post. I just give myself to him and say, "Use me," which leads to literally hours of delicious, often aggressive, pure and rampant fucking. Yep, hungry little slut, that's me.

Maybe TMI, but ah well, it's Christmas.

Lou

Edited to add: That's kind of what I was getting at with my reference to forced orgasms, earlier in the thread: being made to come over and over again, even when I can't physically take it anymore. Like I said, it's hell.

Sounds like it's Christmas every day at Lou's house.

 

[The_Darkness]

Sounds like it's Christmas every day at Lou's house.

Heh. You should read about the Alpaca party in the Last Post thread.

Horror.

 

[English Lady]

Yeah "just fuck me" is my tag line too Lou

I know all about forced orgasms and it is hell...

least it is when I can't walk afterwards

 

[The_Darkness]

Can't walk....never been yelled at for that.

Bruised parts (groin, thighs, cervix)....now that's my usual bag.

But it's not really my fault when she keeps screaming "Harder, HARDER!" with her head all thrashing like that, is it?

 

[English Lady]

Can't walk....never been yelled at for that.

Bruised parts (groin, thighs, cervix)....now that's my usual bag.

But it's not really my fault when she keeps screaming "Harder, HARDER!" with her head all thrashing like that, is it?

No, no you can't be held responsible for that!

*flushes*

I love it when i notice brusies the next day *grins* though I always pretend I'm angry and make him kiss them better for me.....

 

[Guest]

Can't walk....never been yelled at for that.

Bruised parts (groin, thighs, cervix)....now that's my usual bag.

But it's not really my fault when she keeps screaming "Harder, HARDER!" with her head all thrashing like that, is it?

Stop making me hot, I'm not in a position to do anything about it right now!

EL, yep, I love bruises, too! Hand prints on the bum are also incredibly cool. I never complain, though, I thank him.

 

[LadyJeanne]

No, no you can't be held responsible for that!

*flushes*

I love it when i notice brusies the next day *grins* though I always pretend I'm angry and make him kiss them better for me.....

And I always pretend I have no idea how those scratches got on his back and shoulders...but I do kiss them to make them better.

 

[English Lady]

Stop making me hot, I'm not in a position to do anything about it right now!

EL, yep, I love bruises, too! Hand prints on the bum are also incredibly cool. I never complain, though, I thank him.

Ahh you're more of a good girl than I then Lou I think he quite likes kissing me better anyway.

Lady Jeanne... oh yes kissing him better is fun too

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Originally posted by TheEarl
<Makes mental note not to go to Joe Wordsworth's next party>

Timetable for my parties:

Afternoon ludicrous sport (BASEketball or kickball or beer-triathalon or something).
Evening, start the drinking, tap the keg, spread the alcohol of the party out (pick a type buy up every version possible, try them all, judging comes later).
Sometime around the Buzz, its time to start beating each other up. The guys take turns landing punches and generall a good half-hour of people beating the crap out of each other happens.
Then, its onto Karaoke. Because, fuck, if Karaoke isn't fun.
Then, the "shots of the bad stuff". Round of manly shots of the worst tasting shit we can find.
Then ('cause my parties are in the winter) its freezing cold hot-tubbing and pool-party time. The women-folk don't usually play, they think we're dumb.
Then, inevitably, some chick doubts the testicles/penis-cracking.
Show her.
About a good fifteen minutes of "I told you he could do it".
More stupid human tricks, from then on.
A play.
Fucky-fucky.
Sleep.

 

[English Lady]

Well that sounds erm... "fun"

can I just come in for the last 3 items on the agenda Joe?

 

[TheEarl]

Timetable for my parties:

Afternoon ludicrous sport (BASEketball or kickball or beer-triathalon or something).
Evening, start the drinking, tap the keg, spread the alcohol of the party out (pick a type buy up every version possible, try them all, judging comes later).
Sometime around the Buzz, its time to start beating each other up. The guys take turns landing punches and generall a good half-hour of people beating the crap out of each other happens.
Then, its onto Karaoke. Because, fuck, if Karaoke isn't fun.
Then, the "shots of the bad stuff". Round of manly shots of the worst tasting shit we can find.
Then ('cause my parties are in the winter) its freezing cold hot-tubbing and pool-party time. The women-folk don't usually play, they think we're dumb.
Then, inevitably, some chick doubts the testicles/penis-cracking.
Show her.
About a good fifteen minutes of "I told you he could do it".
More stupid human tricks, from then on.
A play.
Fucky-fucky.
Sleep.

Okay, I take it back. I want to come to your next party Joe, that sounds entertaing. I'll provide a rugby ball and we can play 7s - that'll get a thirst up for the beer.

The Earl

 

[Guest]

Joe, that was hilarious. I suppose it would defeat the 'nuance' but I'd love to see a formal invitation with your post printed in some fancy script. I'm copying this for friends (but don't worry, I won't give out your address ).

Earl, if you ever get to a Joe party I shall have to chaperone you.

Perdita/Pear

 

[TheEarl]

Timetable for my parties:

...

Fucky-fucky.
Sleep.

Earl, if you ever get to a Joe party I shall have to chaperone you.

Really Pear? Joe, when's the next one. A Mr T Earl and guest will be attending .

The Earl

 

[BlackShanglan]

Bruised parts (groin, thighs, cervix)....now that's my usual bag.

I prefer a bit more focus and finesse. For me, it's a good night if you can trace the track of passion in the whip-marks. The dappled bee-stings of the knotted flagellum ... the cloudy blooms of the heavy doubled rope ... the welted red kiss of the cat ...

Is there anything more lovely?

Shanglan (who has been reading too much Dorian Gray)