Even More Random Thoughts

[TongueLust]

New York, prepare.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

Lol

Well I do know a cure for that.. but I'm no doctor.

True story . . .

On one occasion, the cure was rubbing me through my jeans until I came in my underwear. I didn’t think anything showed, and I forgot about it. But around the same time, this kid at school was playing a prank by spraying silly string in guys’ underwear when our clothes were hanging in the locker room during basketball practice. Ha, ha, ha—no big deal. But a few nights later, my mom called my dad down to the basement, where she was doing laundry. He was gone for a few minutes, then came back upstairs. My dad, who never cursed or spoke lewdly in front of me, said, “It looks like you got your rocks off in your pants.” I had a guilty conscience, but fortunately I had the silly string incident to fall back on. Otherwise, I couldn’t have come up with a convincing lie.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

Do they know how to unhook a bra?

Oh, I don’t know. I assume they just google it these days. They will never appreciate the intrepid explorers on whose shoulders they stand.

 

[JerseyJade]

True story . . .

On one occasion, the cure was rubbing me through my jeans until I came in my underwear. I didn’t think anything showed, and I forgot about it. But around the same time, this kid at school was playing a prank by spraying silly string in guys’ underwear when our clothes were hanging in the locker room during basketball practice. Ha, ha, ha—no big deal. But a few nights later, my mom called my dad down to the basement, where she was doing laundry. He was gone for a few minutes, then came back upstairs. My dad, who never cursed or spoke lewdly in front of me, said, “It looks like you got your rocks off in your pants.” I had a guilty conscience, but fortunately I had the silly string incident to fall back on. Otherwise, I couldn’t have come up with a convincing lie.

Ewww!

I only made a guy cum in his pants once... wasn't my intention, I had something else in mind.. but we were making out in his truck and I guessed I rubbed a little too much.

 

[Orchidea73]

Oh, I don’t know. I assume they just google it these days. They will never appreciate the intrepid explorers on whose shoulders they stand.

I did a test just now, out of curiosity. This is what's most searched on google, if you type "how to unhook...."
No bra to be seen. I don't know if that's a good sign or not. lol

https://i.imgur.com/cunC8eQ.jpg

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

Ewww!

I only made a guy cum in his pants once... wasn't my intention, I had something else in mind.. but we were making out in his truck and I guessed I rubbed a little too much.

I once took about a four-hour road trip with my girlfriend (later my wife) to visit her parents. I had met her mother before, but not her father, who I understood to be an Italian force of nature who wanted all of his children to walk down the wedding aisle as virgins. So I was already nervous as hell. I was driving, and along the way, my girlfriend gave me a bj, but wouldn’t let me come in her mouth. So all of that was on my jeans when I met her dad. I wanted to be anywhere else at that moment.

 

[JerseyJade]

I once took about a four-hour road trip with my girlfriend (later my wife) to visit her parents. I had met her mother before, but not her father, who I understood to be an Italian force of nature who wanted all of his children to walk down the wedding aisle as virgins. So I was already nervous as hell. I was driving, and along the way, my girlfriend gave me a bj, but wouldn’t let me come in her mouth. So all of that was on my jeans when I met her dad. I wanted to be anywhere else at that moment.

Good Lord!

Well there's never a mess when I do that, but that's just me.

I'm going to bed now. G'night.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

Good Lord!

Well there's never a mess when I do that, but that's just me.

I'm going to bed now. G'night.

G’night!

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

I did a test just now, out of curiosity. This is what's most searched on google, if you type "how to unhook...."
No bra to be seen. I don't know if that's a good sign or not. lol

https://i.imgur.com/cunC8eQ.jpg

I just did the same search, adding “a bra,” and of course it’s all advice for men. As if men who really need to google it are ever going to get near one. Next I’m going to google “how to open a door.”

In all fairness, though, I remember the first time I was fumbling around in the back and the girl I was with rolled her eyes at me and unhooked the front. I didn’t know at the time that women possessed such technology. I was as befuddled as Borat.

 

[Orchidea73]

I just did the same search, adding “a bra,” and of course it’s all advice for men. As if men who really need to google it are ever going to get near one. Next I’m going to google “how to open a door.”

In all fairness, though, I remember the first time I was fumbling around in the back, and the girl I was with rolled her eyes at me and unhooked the front. I didn’t know at the time that women possessed such technology. I was as befuddled as Borat.

The trick is not to type "bra". By not finishing the sentence, google would show you the most searched by people. It seem bra is not among top priorities. So disappointing.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

The trick is not to type "bra". By not finishing the sentence, google would should you the most searched by people. It seem bra is not among top priorities. So disappointing.

Well, I guess that just means that most of us have figured it out. It’s possibly the first skill that we are all highly motivated to apply ourselves to.

 

[Orchidea73]

Well, I guess that just means that most of us have figured it out. It’s possibly the first skill that we are all highly motivated to apply ourselves to.

You're giving me hope for the future generations, Dirty.
Always such an optimist.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

You're giving me hope for the future generations, Dirty.
Always such an optimist.

Har! If I was a CIA agent, this is what I’d use to torture suspected terrorists:

https://youtu.be/55476dCgSsw

I’m only an optimist to the extent that I believe that roaches will pretty easily pick up where humans left off as stewards of this rock, and the universe will manage okay without noticing that we’re gone.

 

[Orchidea73]

Har! If I was a CIA agent, this is what I’d use to torture suspected terrorists:

https://youtu.be/55476dCgSsw

I’m only an optimist to the extent that I believe that roaches will pretty easily pick up where humans left off as stewards of this rock, and the universe will manage okay without noticing that we’re gone.

I'm with you there. Humans are the most pretentious, self-centered and self-consumed pricks of the entire universe. lol

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

I'm with you there. Humans are the most pretentious, self-centered and self-consumed pricks of the entire universe. lol

Let me get back to you on that. I have an appointment with an artist to pose for my portrait. . . .

 

[Orchidea73]

Let me get back to you on that. I have an appointment with an artist to pose for my portrait. . . .

lol

I want a copy.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

lol

I want a copy.

Har! The reason this subject popped into my head was that I was recently going through a footlocker of personal memorabilia, and came across a copy of a portrait of an old girlfriend. In my teen years, a local artist—the only local artist, as far as I could tell—sold all the local country club parents on the notion that what they really needed was portraits of their daughters to hang above their fireplace mantels. The portraits themselves were awful, but he was an expert marketer, and anyone who wanted to be anyone had to enlist his services to keep up with their neighbors. It was ridiculous.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

I firmly believe that, no matter how challenging and awkward the process may sometimes be, staring at a woman’s cleavage enriches my life and inspires me to be the best me I can be. Thank you, women!

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

Well, he’s kinda creepy…

Says the woman with evil faces on her butt.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

Possibly the best expression ever of “EXIT ONLY.” Me, I just take it as yet another roadblock on the path to my happy place.

 

[JerseyJade]

Possibly the best expression ever of “EXIT ONLY.” Me, I just take it as yet another roadblock on the path to my happy place.

Well when you get there, make sure you change your shorts.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

Well when you get there, make sure you change your shorts.

Thanks! You’ve reminded me I need to put another load in the washing machine before I can leave the house again. And maybe order new sheets. Life isn’t fun unless it’s messy.

 

[JerseyJade]

Thanks! You’ve reminded me I need to put another load in the washing machine before I can leave the house again. And maybe order new sheets. Life isn’t fun unless it’s messy.

Maybe for you. I don't like messy, myself.

 

[Dirt_in_the_Ground]

Maybe for you. I don't like messy, myself.

Well, I always pack a hazmat suit when I travel to New Jersey. So I can easily respect your boundaries.

 

[TongueLust]

Alexa! Mind your fucking business.... too funny.