Tallulah's OMD
- Thread starter Tallulah82
- Start date
TomTeacher19
Needs experience pls
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- Dec 13, 2022
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- 3,501
Missing you T
Mrtenant
Lord of Chaos
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- Sep 4, 2009
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- 30,037
That's MrT, and thanks, missing you too.
Tallulah82
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2021
- Posts
- 7,464
Ok, let's do this. The update.
Firstly, the marriage is still open.
Secondly, I've not had a second meet yet - hoping the next one planned happens but we're having car issues so I may not be able to go. We'll see.
Thirdly - and kind of most importantly, my husband has been having some big learning curves and has now plateaued, which I'm grateful for. I'll break this down.
Husband was gung-ho (with my initial support), but it did get to the point where our conversations always seemed to lead back to the OM. No matter what subject it was, he seemed to make a link and bring it up. It got tiresome and eventually irritating to me. So, we made an agreement that the OM would only be talked about at specific times, if we needed to address specific things. I want the OM to feel more organic and it was bulldozing everything.
At one point, I genuinely feared that it had changed him so much that I didn't recognise my own husband. That was a worrying time.
He's had 3 or 4 meets (I lose track) with the same woman - though one was a group situation. And amongst that, he did the thing that I was expecting him to do which is invest himself more into it at a fast rate, rather than taking the fun of sex at face value. Guess what... he got his feelings hurt. From his side of the story, he's done nothing wrong except make assumptions. I believe him because he was acting like we've seen many do on here - to be too caught up in the thrill of it all and to feel all our feelings so hard and fast when new things happen.
He came back down to earth with a big bump and had to tend to his bruised ego as much as anything else. After some reflection on his experiences, he declared that he was stepping back from the OM activity.
Again, I wasn't surprised. But I was a bit cautious as I do have plans set and I wasn't happy with the idea that because I didn't work as fast as he did, then I could miss out on my plans if he wanted to shut it all down there and then.
Fortunately, he has not declared that he wants to close up and revert. However, I wouldn't be surprised if this is a topic for discussion a bit later down the line once my plans have happened.
IF this does happen, I'm prepared for it. This was never my idea and it's super cliched that a husband opens it, only to close it when things go wrong on his part. But... I will fully respect it if this is what happens and I won't put up a fight about it. But who knows, he may surprise me further by keeping it open and then re-entering his own activities but with a lesson learned and applied so that next time, he can have the fun without the drama.
Firstly, the marriage is still open.
Secondly, I've not had a second meet yet - hoping the next one planned happens but we're having car issues so I may not be able to go. We'll see.
Thirdly - and kind of most importantly, my husband has been having some big learning curves and has now plateaued, which I'm grateful for. I'll break this down.
Husband was gung-ho (with my initial support), but it did get to the point where our conversations always seemed to lead back to the OM. No matter what subject it was, he seemed to make a link and bring it up. It got tiresome and eventually irritating to me. So, we made an agreement that the OM would only be talked about at specific times, if we needed to address specific things. I want the OM to feel more organic and it was bulldozing everything.
At one point, I genuinely feared that it had changed him so much that I didn't recognise my own husband. That was a worrying time.
He's had 3 or 4 meets (I lose track) with the same woman - though one was a group situation. And amongst that, he did the thing that I was expecting him to do which is invest himself more into it at a fast rate, rather than taking the fun of sex at face value. Guess what... he got his feelings hurt. From his side of the story, he's done nothing wrong except make assumptions. I believe him because he was acting like we've seen many do on here - to be too caught up in the thrill of it all and to feel all our feelings so hard and fast when new things happen.
He came back down to earth with a big bump and had to tend to his bruised ego as much as anything else. After some reflection on his experiences, he declared that he was stepping back from the OM activity.
Again, I wasn't surprised. But I was a bit cautious as I do have plans set and I wasn't happy with the idea that because I didn't work as fast as he did, then I could miss out on my plans if he wanted to shut it all down there and then.
Fortunately, he has not declared that he wants to close up and revert. However, I wouldn't be surprised if this is a topic for discussion a bit later down the line once my plans have happened.
IF this does happen, I'm prepared for it. This was never my idea and it's super cliched that a husband opens it, only to close it when things go wrong on his part. But... I will fully respect it if this is what happens and I won't put up a fight about it. But who knows, he may surprise me further by keeping it open and then re-entering his own activities but with a lesson learned and applied so that next time, he can have the fun without the drama.
tallladiesman
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Oct 24, 2016
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You are a very brave woman
Complete respect
Tallulah82
Literotica Guru
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- Jan 31, 2021
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- 7,464
I think Lit has taught me so much over the years that I'm generally blasé about sex and I'm aware of how to handle my own emotional ties.
I completely recognise that he's at the beginning of his own journey into the delights and horrors that await deviant newbies and I have to give him space and time to figure it out.
It's tested my patience, for sure. And as I said, I was genuinely worried at one point that I'd lost my husband to this. He dumped all of his usual extra-curricular activities to focus on sex instead. He also took an actual strop one night when I said no to sex - something he's never done. He was not the man I knew.
We've had our challenges, but credit to him that he's always listened to my concerns and has tried to do better. And this is what's making it work.
Tallulah82
Literotica Guru
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- Jan 31, 2021
- Posts
- 7,464
Brave. Foolish. Very thin line.
aussiegeekygal
Faceless
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BongoGal
Compartmentalizing
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- Mar 17, 2008
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I had to look up that phrase.
