Do we really control our dreams?

[MrMannson]

Woke up this morning after having an intense sexual dream. It was very vivid and pretty explicit.

My question is this; how much control does one have with their dreams, especially sexually? My dream was of a bisexual nature, of which my wife doesn’t know I have feelings like that. I don’t have these often, but now that I woke up 100 percent aroused, what do I do with this? Forget it or tell her?

Maybe my intrusive thoughts are catching up with me. Anyone else have sexual dreams that either mirror how you feel or blindside you with something you hadn’t been aroused by before?

 

[Mrs_and_mr]

I’ve read about in a psychology class I took. It was selective dreaming. I did not buy into it. There are just too many unknowns. But basically it was brainwashing techniques to influence dreams. I never tried it. All this was to help people with nightmares. I do know if you listen to a book and fall asleep for me it guides my dreams.

 

[MrMannson]

I’ve been wondering about books and how much I could research about this.

At the same time, I watch an unhealthy amount of porn, and it’s not a real surprise how much it crosses my brain all day.

That being said, sometimes I dream about stuff I don’t entertain. I had an incest dream about my sister years ago, of whom I never thought that way about her. Where did that come from?

Interesting, thanks for your response!

 

[gk6h]

Have you looked into lucid dreaming? I was able to do it a few times but it was a bit scary I was a sleep but in the dream I was in my house moving around touching thing picking them up but I got to this point where I was having trouble telling if I was a wake or asleep and started to freak out a bit so I forded my self awake

 

[jomar]

I do it a lot.

 

[Not Normal]

Judging by the completely random and outright weird dream I had around 6am today, no, I have no control over my dreams.

 

[bookworm69]

Have you looked into lucid dreaming? I was able to do it a few times but it was a bit scary I was a sleep but in the dream I was in my house moving around touching thing picking them up but I got to this point where I was having trouble telling if I was a wake or asleep and started to freak out a bit so I forded my self awake

I've heard of lucid dreaming and have done it a couple of times. The most vivid dream was I was one of the criminals in Heat, in DeNiro's crew, when the bank was robbed. There's an epic gun battle with the cops ... and I was shot up, but since one of my dream rules is that I can't die ... the scene rolled back until I became part of Pacino's cop crew and lived.

For me, lucid dreaming is very rare. Although I believe I can sometimes influence a dream if I recognize in the dream that I am dreaming. When I can't seem to change the course of the dream (as in a bad dream), I wake up.

 

[Robbie527]

Woke up this morning after having an intense sexual dream. It was very vivid and pretty explicit.

My question is this; how much control does one have with their dreams, especially sexually? My dream was of a bisexual nature, of which my wife doesn’t know I have feelings like that. I don’t have these often, but now that I woke up 100 percent aroused, what do I do with this? Forget it or tell her?

Maybe my intrusive thoughts are catching up with me. Anyone else have sexual dreams that either mirror how you feel or blindside you with something you hadn’t been aroused by before?

I rarely have erotic dreams but my wife has been having extra marital activity for many years. Despite that it is just something she does almost as though she was a tennis enthusiast. I see other women and so it works reasonably well most of the time. This year though I have had a repetitive dream and it came again last night. We we in the Bluewater shopping centre and looking for a new sofa in John Lewis. My wife wandered off looking at different ones while I tried out a reclining armchair. I saw a very tall black salesperson approach her and they started talking. I got up to walk across and by the time I had put the recliner down and stood up she was bending over the back of a sofa with her skirt up around her waist getting a lot more than a sales presentation and her blouse open with her breasts hanging out over the other side of the sofa. Even weirder was when we had gone in she was wearing a pair of jeans and a sweater. As I got closer I saw her panties were around her left ankle hooked around her shoe and he was not wearing a condom. She was telling him to let go inside her because she was past being able to get pregnant. I then went back and sat down until they had finished. I watched as he pulled out and she bent down and took him in her mouth and then stood again and kissed him very affectionately while he had his hands all over her breasts. They both walked over to me and she still had her breasts out and was holding his hand. She said that she knew what she wanted and that James, apparently the salesperson's name, would be coming to install it and make sure everything was exactly as she wanted. So...no I do not want to see her fucked by a black man. She tried that once and it went badly. No I don't want to actually see her fucked by anyone. I know what she does, where she goes most of the time and, in general, who she is with. No I do not want any private messages. I would like to know why I have this dream though as it is totally alien to any 'normal' dreams I have.