Disobedient subs

[Andraste]

my Master is also my Daddy, and i am his little girl in addition to being his slave, although he would balk at being considered a "Daddydom" and we really don't have that sort of dynamic. there is certainly a time and place in our relationship for playfulness, for teasing, for joking, but ONLY at the correct place and time and never in a bratty/smart-alecky way. if i even get within a hundred yards of that line (like the time i slipped up and playfully said "well duhhh, Daddy"), i'm swiftly "rewarded" with a firm slap across the mouth, maybe two...and there certainly won't be any playtime (joking, teasing, light-heartedness) for a good time after that.

so teasing is only d/s if it's within the rules you live by?

i'll refer any future doms to you before they set their limits.

 

[HottieMama]

my Master is also my Daddy, and i am his little girl in addition to being his slave, although he would balk at being considered a "Daddydom" and we really don't have that sort of dynamic. there is certainly a time and place in our relationship for playfulness, for teasing, for joking, but ONLY at the correct place and time and never in a bratty/smart-alecky way. if i even get within a hundred yards of that line (like the time i slipped up and playfully said "well duhhh, Daddy"), i'm swiftly "rewarded" with a firm slap across the mouth, maybe two...and there certainly won't be any playtime (joking, teasing, light-heartedness) for a good time after that.

See..and this is where you and i will essentially differ..now and probably forever. i DON'T....just DON'T understand how light-heartedness is a "reward." For me, it is something i MUST have at all times. If my D/s relationship doesn't make me feel "good" on a fundamental level, then why the fuck am i in it?

[i am truly blessed to have a PYL (christ, that gets on my fucking nerves too) that's not all hung up on the "shoulds" for D/s relationships. ]

 

[ownedsubgal]

so teasing is only d/s if it's within the rules you live by?

i'll refer any future doms to you before they set their limits.

i really wish you would get off of that. of course a Dominant sets the rules and constructs the relationship however they choose, that is not the issue here. the issue is that not everything falls under the umbrella of dominance or submission, simply because one person is giving an order and another person obeys it (sometimes).

teasing is all fine and dandy, if that's something the Dominant likes and it fits the particular couple, as i and others have said numerous times. manipulation and blatant disobedience are things that are NOT part of a D/s relationship, no matter what the particular "rules" are. D/s is not a game, it is life, it is people.

 

[serijules]

There is a type of D/s or whatever you want to call it where bratting and mouthiness is not just the norm, but usually the foundation of the relationship. I refer to it as the "spanko" community since spanking is a huge focus and preferred form of punishment, and very early on I was very involved with this type of play, although I was never the brat that most of my friends were/are.

Mostly I would consider that kind of play topping and bottoming versus dominance and submission, but many of the relationships were a bit of a mix of it, and it worked just fine. I realized it wasn't for me as I DO find bratting very manipulative and unappealing for the most part, but many of these tops loved the interaction, the "excuse" to punish or spank.

Relax a little guys, it can be fun, really, it can.

Daddy/little girl was common as well. Little girl mouths off or brats or plays tricks on Daddy and Daddy scolds her and punishes her and spanks her, and thus the control is re-established for a time until it is pushed again. It's just a different kind of dance, that's all.

It IS a kind of dominance and submission, in my opinion. The control is there, it's just not so boldly present. I can't imagine being as disobedient and disrespectful as some of my friends would act towards their partners at times, but then again, I live a different style, I dance to a different drummer. Those same bratty, pushy bottoms were fantastic people and most were respectful of boundaries...in other words, you don't brat without permission, you don't force your kink on others. They were aware of the lines they could cross and remain within the consented line and if they pushed over that, well, they suffered the consequences. Again, just a different sort of consequence than some of the rest of us may expect. (loss of privileges, more severe type of physical punishment or grounding vs being released)

One of my good friends and submissive N was a sometimes-bottom to one of the guys that would come to the parties, a pretty well known and very sadistic huge 6 foot 7 inch bear of a dom that is very skilled with a bullwhip and pretty well known in the community at large. She used to play the funniest bratty tricks on him and he would whisk her off and "punish" the hell out of her, could hear her screaming two floors away, lol. It worked for them, they had fun with it. I can't imagine anyone else treating him like that and getting any reaction other than annoyance or simply being ignored. Is she any less of a sub or him any less of a dom because they play outside the "acceptable" realm regarding respect and obedience?

Not if it's consensual.

It's just another form of edge play, really

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[Andraste]

See..and this is where you and i will essentially differ..now and probably forever. i DON'T....just DON'T understand how light-heartedness is a "reward." For me, it is something i MUST have at all times. If my D/s relationship doesn't make me feel "good" on a fundamental level, then why the fuck am i in it?

[i am truly blessed to have a PYL (christ, that gets on my fucking nerves too) that's not all hung up on the "shoulds" for D/s relationships. ]

i've lived my life to a list he wrote every morning on the board.
exactly what was expected of me that day.
i did the list, i went where he took me, i respected his choices even when i thought they were wrong & never argued them, never threw bad choices in his face, never questioned. we moved house, took loans, bought cars only on his choice.

that was the line.

and on the other side, i argued politics {until he told me i wasn't allowed to}, i teased him for his grey hair and i put ice down his shorts.

 

[Andraste]

i really wish you would get off of that. of course a Dominant sets the rules and constructs the relationship however they choose, that is not the issue here. the issue is that not everything falls under the umbrella of dominance or submission, simply because one person is giving an order and another person obeys it (sometimes).

teasing is all fine and dandy, if that's something the Dominant likes and it fits the particular couple, as i and others have said numerous times. manipulation and blatant disobedience are things that are NOT part of a D/s relationship, no matter what the particular "rules" are. D/s is not a game, it is life, it is people.

d/s is a dom/sub relationship.

if he's dominant & i'm submissive then that's what it is.

everything else is for a couple to decide for themselves.
disobedience, in a situation where he has given unspoken permit for disobedience, isn't going against d/s because it's following the rules he's created!

 

[ownedsubgal]

See..and this is where you and i will essentially differ..now and probably forever. i DON'T....just DON'T understand how light-heartedness is a "reward." For me, it is something i MUST have at all times. If my D/s relationship doesn't make me feel "good" on a fundamental level, then why the fuck am i in it?

[i am truly blessed to have a PYL (christ, that gets on my fucking nerves too) that's not all hung up on the "shoulds" for D/s relationships. ]

Hottie...i never said that light-heartedness is a reward in my relationship, it isn't. it's a natural part of our interaction together in the appropriate place and time. by light-heartedness i am referring to those moments of playfulness, teasing, joking together, being silly, etc. because love is a part of our dynamic, and because we are best friends to boot, light-heartedness and fun is natural for us, again when appropriate.

however if i've messed up, and gotten too close to that line between playfulness and forgetting my place, he is quick to put me in check, and until he feels that the lesson has sufficiently gotten through to me, he will not allow any further playfulness. that time when i said "duh", i meant no disrespect or harm, however i was speaking to him as i would speak to a peer, an equal, and such a thing is NEVER okay. playing around is all fine and dandy, but i must never forget that he is Master, not my buddy D. thankfully i haven't slipped up like that in a long time.

 

[Andraste]

I'm not seeing where OSG is saying it "should" be like XYZ to "count" or be "real". It's how her dynamic works, and how she views BDSM, and she's unable to relate to Dolf's dynamic.

Honestly, I'd never want a D/s relationship as Dolf describes it... it would get on my freaking nerves, and I'd feel like I was running the show. If it works for her, great, but just because OSG's relationship is the anthesis of Dolf's style, doesn't mean OSG is demanding Dolf do things her way.

Dolf= Andraste, BTW. LOL

nope, but she did say that it's not d/s.
which i think is crap.

if i felt like i was running the show i'd be outa there!
i just like the feel of the limits, in a playful way.
that's how dogs sort out the pack order. they play to avoid a battle.
it lets me feel his strength without confronting him.
feeling his strength is comforting and reassuring.
him laughing at me, smiling at my silliness, feels good. i've put a smile on his face!

playing the game the right way is to a huge degree about pleasing him.

 

[Andraste]

There is a type of D/s or whatever you want to call it where bratting and mouthiness is not just the norm, but usually the foundation of the relationship. I refer to it as the "spanko" community since spanking is a huge focus and preferred form of punishment, and very early on I was very involved with this type of play, although I was never the brat that most of my friends were/are.

Mostly I would consider that kind of play topping and bottoming versus dominance and submission, but many of the relationships were a bit of a mix of it, and it worked just fine. I realized it wasn't for me as I DO find bratting very manipulative and unappealing for the most part, but many of these tops loved the interaction, the "excuse" to punish or spank.

Relax a little guys, it can be fun, really, it can.

Daddy/little girl was common as well. Little girl mouths off or brats or plays tricks on Daddy and Daddy scolds her and punishes her and spanks her, and thus the control is re-established for a time until it is pushed again. It's just a different kind of dance, that's all.

It IS a kind of dominance and submission, in my opinion. The control is there, it's just not so boldly present. I can't imagine being as disobedient and disrespectful as some of my friends would act towards their partners at times, but then again, I live a different style, I dance to a different drummer. Those same bratty, pushy bottoms were fantastic people and most were respectful of boundaries...in other words, you don't brat without permission, you don't force your kink on others. They were aware of the lines they could cross and remain within the consented line and if they pushed over that, well, they suffered the consequences. Again, just a different sort of consequence than some of the rest of us may expect. (loss of privileges, more severe type of physical punishment or grounding vs being released)

One of my good friends and submissive N was a sometimes-bottom to one of the guys that would come to the parties, a pretty well known and very sadistic huge 6 foot 7 inch bear of a dom that is very skilled with a bullwhip and pretty well known in the community at large. She used to play the funniest bratty tricks on him and he would whisk her off and "punish" the hell out of her, could hear her screaming two floors away, lol. It worked for them, they had fun with it. I can't imagine anyone else treating him like that and getting any reaction other than annoyance or simply being ignored. Is she any less of a sub or him any less of a dom because they play outside the "acceptable" realm regarding respect and obedience?

Not if it's consensual.

It's just another form of edge play, really

that was just a fantastic post!

 

[callinectes]

It's a hell of a day when I find myself 100% in agreement with OSG and Cat.

Even though the intensity of our respective relationships are on nearly opposite ends of the spectrum the basic construct is the same. Unlike them I do have limits but everything within those limits is fair game. It doesn't matter if I am barely on the edge of accepting the activity or if I am in a bad mood, the bottom line is I agreed to it all. Saying no just isn't an option. Saying "make me" damn sure isn't going to get me anywhere.

ETA, we play around and tease a lot. In fact we are pretty goofy most of the time. But as OSG said there is a time and a place, even in my casual relationship.

 

[Flamestorm06]

Depends

Depends on what you mean. A major disobiedence, something that would betray the trust in the relationship, well that i wouldn't do. A minor one, like not doing what he tells me to right away in bed or ignoring his orders, well i'd probably just do that because i liked being playful like that ^.^

 

[elizabeth22673]

.........

 

[littleone77]

I hate, absolutely hate to disappoint El_C. I want to be as perfect as possible for him. Having him displeased at me is worse than any punishment he could possibly give me. (Btw, there are punishment boundries with us due to my past experience).

When I do misbehave it is never ever on purpose. Either it is because of my attitude/mood/hormones or because of an external factor.

Random add on: Someone once told me (a Dom) that it is the sub which actually controls the relationship dynamic. There is truth in that.

 

[Xelebes]

This is a question for the subs - what would cause you to be disobedient and what would you do to be disobedient?

Stupid questions like this? Fonts like this? Manipulated sizes in posts? Funny colours?

 

[HottieMama]

Stupid questions like this? Fonts like this? Manipulated sizes in posts? Funny colours?

Seriously...Do you have to be THIS much of an asshole?

 

[Xelebes]

Seriously...Do you have to be THIS much of an asshole?

No, not really.

 

[Andraste]

Stupid questions like this? Fonts like this? Manipulated sizes in posts? Funny colours?

this post made me sad.

twigaphilia gone tragically wrong

 

[satindesire]

exactly.

hell, i haven't met an un-sammy sub on here.

*raises hand* Right here babe.

 

[Chris_Xavier]

Chris how on earth did you even think of that ?

No soup for you !!!

I have an evil mind. I am constantly playing out scenarios in my head about doing this or doing that. It is how I exorcise some of my demons.

 

[El_Cazador999]

I hate, absolutely hate to disappoint El_C. I want to be as perfect as possible for him. Having him displeased at me is worse than any punishment he could possibly give me. (Btw, there are punishment boundries with us due to my past experience).

When I do misbehave it is never ever on purpose. Either it is because of my attitude/mood/hormones or because of an external factor.

Random add on: Someone once told me (a Dom) that it is the sub which actually controls the relationship dynamic. There is truth in that.

Just so that everyone understands, Littleone is about as perfect as one can get. She almost never misbehaves although sometimes she thinks she has, when she really hasn't. She is all I could ask for and I consider myself very lucky.

I hope every Daddy/Dom can be as lucky as I am and a big thanks to all those that passed on this special jewel.

 

[Xelebes]

this post made me sad.

twigaphilia gone tragically wrong

Just so you all know, I'm being facetious.

I'm responding to the thread title.

 

[graceanne]

Just so you all know, I'm being facetious.

I'm responding to the thread title.

You? Facetious?

My illusions are all shattered. *sob*

 

[Andraste]

Just so you all know, I'm being facetious.

I'm responding to the thread title.

my post was entirely serious!

just so you know.

twigophile!

 

[Glitter_Pants]

I dunno, sometimes I like being disobediant to my dom/daddy. i enjoy seeing his reaction, and then getting his punishment. I dunno what type of sub that makes me, it's just how I am...